by Bella Juarez
“You didn’t need to do this, James,” Irene said as she poured herself a cup of coffee.
“I wanted you to sleep,” James said.
Irene sat at the table and yawned. “I need to go and get my car before you leave.”
“It’s here, sugar, I went and got it this morning after my run,” James said, looking down at the paper. “I made you an omelet.”
Irene said nothing as she stared at him. She looked around the kitchen and saw the skillet on the stove. In the sink, she noticed the dishes he’d used to make breakfast were washed and in the dish rack. She used to cringe when David offered to cook because he would leave a wreck and a mountain of dishes to clean. James stood and went to the stove. He plated the omelet he’d prepared and set it in front of Irene. It looked amazing.
“Do you want something else with that, sugar?” James asked. He picked up his cup and refreshed his coffee.
“No. This is fine,” Irene
said lowly.
“I’ve got to go to London this week on business. I should be back in ten days,” James said, returning to his seat.
Irene said nothing as she cut a piece of her breakfast and took a bite. She was famished, and the meal he’d prepared was delicious.
“What are your plans for Christmas?” James asked.
“I’ll spend it with Amy and Gavin, and then I’ll go visit my mother and sister, too.”
“Would you like to do something with me?”
“I’m not sure I want to continue seeing you,” Irene said sternly.
James smiled patiently, shook his head, and took a sip of his coffee. Damn he’s handsome! He was dressed in a denim button-down shirt with khaki pants. As usual, he was neatly groomed and his clothes fit his hard body flawlessly. His shirt and trousers were perfectly pressed. She looked down at her breakfast.
“Sugar, I hate repeating myself. How many times do I need to tell you I’m not going away and you belong with me?” James asked.
“Admit you were wrong,” Irene said, taking another bite.
“No. I didn’t do anything wrong,” James said patiently. “I didn’t touch another woman last night, other than to introduce myself. You, on the other hand, went through a few men before you finally got to me. They were all over you, Irene. How pissed off do you think I was watching that? I can’t stand the thought of someone else touching you.” She remained silent and looked down at her food. “I was asking because I need to go to Washington, DC, for business the week in between Christmas and the New Year. I’ll be there for three days. I wanted to take you with me.”
“I’m not going anywhere with you until you admit you were wrong and you apologize,” Irene said tersely.
“All right, sugar, I guess we do this the hard way,” James said, sipping his coffee, unruffled.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” Irene asked sharply.
“It means, Irene, I don’t quit and I won’t quit until I have what I want. The hard way is my standard day, sugar.”
“James, you need help.”
“No, I need you. That’s all I want,” James said, standing. He walked to Irene, bent, and kissed her gently. “I love you, sugar, and no matter how bad you treat me, I’ll always come back for more.”
James walked out the door, and Irene shook her head as she heard it softly close. She pushed her half-eaten plate away from her. She was so confused and conflicted. She hadn’t talked to anyone about her breakup with James. Her lack of self-control would ruin her if she didn’t make some decisions soon about the direction they were going.
She dressed for the day and waited until eight o’clock and called Dr. Adams for an emergency appointment. Irene was told to come at three p.m.
Irene waited in Dr. Adams’s office for her emergency appointment. It was the last appointment of the day for Dr. Adams. She’d never asked for an emergency appointment before but didn’t know what else to do. Dr. Adams always seemed to make such good sense and give sound, practical advice.
“Irene?” Dr. Adams called from the doorway.
Irene followed her back to her office where they’d often conduct her sessions. Dr. Adams took a chair opposite Irene’s usual place.
“I was surprised to hear you needed to see me before your regular appointment. Did something happen?” Dr. Adams asked.
“Doctor…” Irene started.
Irene told Dr. Adams about her and James and the sudden shift their relationship had taken. She told her about James’s subtle but constant attention. Irene told her about the conversations they’d the few times they’d seen each other after the incident in San Diego, and finally Irene told her about the night before. Doctor Adams sat and listened patiently.
“I don’t know what to do. I want to forgive him and a part of me even believes him. I can’t get past what I saw,” Irene said.
“What’s his explanation?” Doctor Adams asked.
“He says he can’t tell me.”
Dr. Adams frowned. “Has he said why he can’t tell you?”
“It involves his job.”
“What does he do?”
“At the time, he was a Navy SEAL. He’s just retired.”
“A Navy SEAL?” Dr. Adams asked, surprised. Irene nodded her head. “You say he’s just retired. What does he do now?”
“He works for a private military company in Austin.”
Dr. Adams sat back and folded her hands. It seemed to Irene she was digesting the information Irene had just given her.
“Men like Mr. Jones are a very interesting breed, Irene…” Dr. Adams started. “Let’s consider something. Let’s say it’s exactly like you believe and he had a tryst with a much younger woman. If he were to admit that he cheated on you, could you forgive him and move on?”
Irene walked to the window overlooking the historic town square. “I don’t know. I know I could never trust him again. No. I don’t think I could do that. I couldn’t forgive him.”
“Let’s say the opposite is true and he’s telling you the truth. Men like Mr. Jones live with a lot of secrets, and unconditional trust is a huge requirement in any relationship they have, work or personal. For several reasons, they can’t talk about what they do. They’re gone all the time, and there are a lot of bad things they see and do that I’m sure they’d love to forget. If he were telling you the truth, could you be that understanding?” Dr. Adams asked.
Irene paused a long time before answering. “Doctor, I lived with that sort of man for over thirty years. I think toward the end of David’s life, all those secrets and demons started to catch up with him. He was distant and obsessed with his work. I was lonely, and I wanted my husband back. He was a stranger before he died. I don’t think I could do that again,” Irene said.
“I think you’ve just answered your own question. No matter how great the sex is, Mr. Jones isn’t the man for you,” Dr. Adams said.
Irene closed her eyes and took a deep breath. The stinging truth of Dr. Adams’s statement made part of Irene’s being scream out in protest. Being with James was where she needed to be and nothing in her life ever felt more right. Then, there was part of her that knew Dr. Adams’s last statement was truer than she was ready to admit and was the very reason Irene had dug in her heels with James. She made up her mind. For her own sanity, she would move on without James in her life.
* * * *
JJ waited for Irene at a small bistro just around the corner from his condo in Austin. He was so glad she'd asked to see him when he returned from London. He was hoping she’d changed her mind about going to Washington, DC, with him. He was planning on taking her to the Smithsonian Museum of Science while they were there. The trip with Mick had been exhausting and he still had to debrief with Rock but he managed to hold all his other business off to see Irene. He spotted her immediately when she walked into the bistro.
“Hello, sugar!” JJ said, standing as she took the seat across from him.
“James…” Irene started.
The hair on t
he back of JJ’s neck stood on end. Something was wrong, very wrong. Irene was nervous and fidgeting with the napkin on the table. Whatever she wanted to say wasn’t good news.
“What’s up, sugar?” James asked, sitting back in his seat.
“James, I didn’t want to tell you this over the phone…” Irene started again.
“Irene, please just tell me. Whatever it is just say it.”
“James, I can’t see you anymore.” JJ started to protest but Irene stopped him. “Please don’t make this any more difficult than it already is for me. I’m sorry, I can’t get past what happened and I can’t keep seeing you. I need you to respect my decision and let me move on. Please, James.”
JJ stared at the wall behind Irene. He ground his teeth in frustration. What the fuck more can I do? He knew it was no use. Irene was a strong woman and her mind was made up. JJ also knew there was no way he was letting Irene slip through his fingers. There was still the wedding in St Thomas and he was sure as hell going to it. He made the split decision to let her have the couple of months until the wedding to think and hopefully realize she was wrong.
“All right, Irene. Good-bye.”
Chapter Twelve
BRAVO-ZULU Security
Classroom Number 2
Austin, Texas
February 04, 2009, 1845 Zulu
Two months later
“You will see this again,” JJ said to the group assembled in the training room.
JJ watched as half the students wrote down what he’d just pointed out and the other seemed glazed over in boredom. You will see this again. He’d told them from the beginning it meant memorize it, you will need it again. BRAVO-ZULU had just picked up a large contract with the State of Texas to provide security. During their field training tomorrow afternoon, he would make damn sure he painfully drove his point home with those who would screw up because they weren’t paying attention. Class time was almost up.
“Memorize those building layouts, boys. We’re running through them tomorrow afternoon. If you screw up, it’ll be painful,” JJ warned.
“Are we done, JJ?” one of the young men asked.
“You’re done,” JJ confirmed.
The young man who’d asked the question was one of those not paying attention during class. He was a cocky boy and screwed up a lot. He always seemed to shift the blame onto one of his teammates. JJ made a mental note to watch him during close-quarters training tomorrow. The young men filed out of the classroom. They were all newly discharged from the military or military wannabes. The young man who’d asked to be dismissed was one JJ knew would not last through his program. He had a way of washing out the undesirables quickly.
This class was in phase one of the training required for nonspecial-operations personnel. These men would hold domestic security positions, like the contract for the state of Texas. By the end of phase two, JJ would’ve half the class size he originally started with. By the end of phase three, a third of those would be gone. The physical, classroom, and tactical training these men received prepared them physically and strategically for their work. Many of these young men were surprised that he could keep up with them and sometimes outpace them in endurance. When they finished training with him, they were prepared for damn near anything and were good representatives of the company.
JJ gathered his binder and went back to his office. The class would be doing physical training for the next two hours. He laid out a course for a five-mile run, calisthenics, and upper-body strength training. He had a low tolerance for lack of discipline and laziness. He would sadistically take it out of a trainee’s ass if they didn’t follow his program to the letter. They hated him now, but would thank him later when their asses were on the line and they had the skills to get through whatever situation they had to deal with.
BRAVO-ZULU was gaining a reputation for a tough but thorough program. They were starting to get requests for tactical training from outside groups, including some small-town police departments. JJ and Jake had discussed expanding the program to include training those who worked outside the company. For now, the facilities they had would not support these requests. Jake and Mick were investigating expanding the facilities to support outside training requests. It would make the company a lot of money. So far, Jake had turned all external requests for training away.
JJ picked up his phone and called San Antonio. Thankfully, the shit storm with Rafe had been resolved. Rafe and his doings had come to an end when he kidnapped Rock’s wife and tried to kill both of Rock and Anna. Rafe was really dead this time. Rock and his team had managed to shut him down for good and the pieces of a fucked-up puzzle had come together. Rafe was greedy and crazy, just as JJ had known him to be from their very first meeting. JJ had still never forgiven Rafe for screwing over Jake Maccabee.
“Rock? Did I see that e-mail right, no reserve duty this month?” JJ asked.
“We’re all taking leave, remember?” Rock asked.
Everyone would be leaving next week for the big wedding down in St. Thomas. JJ had almost canceled his flight and declined the invitation a few weeks after he got back from London and talked with Irene because he was angry. Unfortunately, Amy had asked JJ to walk her down the aisle with Irene. He couldn’t say no to his sweet little Amy. Going to this wedding would mean he would’ve to spend a week with Irene in very close quarters. He was giving Irene space. Being that close to her, he knew his self-control would slip and he would be all over her working to convince her she was wrong.
Amy kept JJ informed about Irene’s activities. There were no men in Irene’s life that Amy knew of. With his job consuming almost all of his waking hours, he decided to let things go until after the wedding. He thought with a sting to his heart how Irene had managed to make the split with him final after he had returned from London. But with time he managed to get a grip and realize that there was no way he could walk away without fight. It would never be over even if Irene thought so. He was backing off. For now.
* * * *
JJ found himself walking through the Austin-Bergstrom Airport early on a cold February morning as he checked in for his flight to St. Thomas. Mick would be taking his classes while he was gone for ten days. He stepped up to the desk and set his bag on the scale.
“Are you checking in baggage, sir?” the clerk asked as her fingers flew across the keyboard.
“No, but I’m declaring a weapon in my baggage,” JJ said as he presented his military identification and the permit to carry the weapon on board an aircraft. After his two little run-ins with assassins, Dixie arranged for him to carry a weapon wherever he went.
“All right, sir.” The clerk noted the declaration and gave him a special tag allowing him to pass through airport security. “With your frequent-flyer miles would you like to upgrade to business class, sir? It gives you a little more leg room.”
“Sure.” JJ shrugged.
“Would you like me to make that applicable on your return flight, sir?” the clerk asked.
“Yeah, that’s fine.”
JJ finished up at the desk and proceeded through airport security. He was taking a direct flight to Charlotte, North Carolina, where he would connect for his flight to St. Thomas. The security guard looked at the tag on his luggage and asked him to step aside to a table.
JJ knew the drill. He walked to the table and presented his identification and permit once more. The little security guard searched through his luggage and JJ mentally ticked off twenty-seven mistakes the man had made. JJ looked at the sloppy uniform and the lack of attention to detail. Had this been one of his trainees he would’ve torn this kid a new asshole.
The man let JJ through and he walked, noting in his mind the location of the cameras and plain-clothes security people littered through the terminal. He found his gate and checked his watch. He had another hour before his plane left so he dug out his iPad and started working on the new facilities plan Jake had asked him to do.
JJ noticed the terminal filling up and knew it
was getting close to boarding time. He put away his iPad and looked at his watch. In a few minutes they’d be boarding the aircraft. He had enough to keep him busy on the flight because he needed to catch up on some reading. He also needed to work on developing a new training program to update the Special Forces personnel of the company. He stood and walked as they announced the final boarding call for the flight.
JJ was one of the last passengers to board the aircraft, even though his row had been one of the first called. He liked to go on last, watching the other passengers as they boarded the plane. When he finally decided to enter the aircraft he would scan the cabin to see where everyone was sitting. He took his seat and a deep breath as he started for St. Thomas.
JJ was able to catch a combat nap in between Charlotte and St. Thomas. He’d noticed a man watching him throughout the flight from Charlotte off and on. When the flight landed in St. Thomas, he grabbed his bag and started through the terminal. He glanced at his watch. Gavin would be picking him up soon because his flight was on time. He was stopped right before he was able to exit the secure area of the terminal.
“Sir, can I have a word with you?” the man asked. It was the man who was on the flight from Charlotte that had been watching him.
“Okay…” JJ said.
JJ walked with the man to a room next to the security checkpoint in the airport. He noticed two other local security personnel had fallen in behind the man. What the fuck is this? They entered the room. The two security guards stood on either side of the closed door and the man that had asked JJ to the room approached him.
“I’m Federal Agent Paul Esties, sir. Place your bag on the table and step away. I need to check your luggage and your identification,” the man said firmly.
“May I ask why?” JJ asked, not moving.
“I have reasonable suspicion that you’re carrying a weapon,” the agent said.
What the hell is this? JJ was already stressed about seeing Irene. Now this dumbass was harassing him about carrying a weapon he declared and had a permit to carry? He was getting a little testy.
