After Dorcas had gone he lay still, trying to recollect what had happened the night before. But he could only remember discovering Loris and Dickson in each other's arms, and then driving off in his car with Elaine. Where they had eaten, and to whose party they had gone afterwards, remained a mystery, but he must obviously have drunk more than was good for him, for how he had got home or who had put him to bed he did not know.
The butler came in with coffee and poured it out, and Brett sat up carefully and took the cup. "How did I get home last night, Dorcas?"
"Mrs. Forest brought you back, suh. She took yo' car and drove herself home in it."
Brett swore softly. "Lord, I must have been drunk!"
"Can ah get you anything else, suh?" the old man asked impassively.
"Yes, you can bring me an Alka-Seltzer."
"Ah'm sorry, Mis' Brett, ah plum forgot to bring one along with the coffee."
"That's all right, Dorcas—I'm not in the habit of having hangovers, so I guess you didn't think."
As soon as Dorcas went out Brett reached for the telephone and dialled the Loftus number. A second or two later he was put through to Elaine and her voice, light and sibilant, came over the line.
"How are you this morning, Elaine?"
"I'm fine, Brett. But how are you? You should have a terrible hangover right now."
He gave a short laugh. "I have. Thanks for driving me home. Hope I didn't disgrace myself last night, but I can't remember a darned thing."
There was a short silence and he would have been puzzled if he had seen Elaine's expression. She had only just awakened before Brett telephoned and had lain in bed thinking over the events of the previous night. The implication of Loris's drawn face and the fact that she had stayed up so late for no apparent reason had not been lost on her, and she was willing to bet that Brett's distraught manner had some connection with the girl. Brett had been extremely drunk last night—a rare occurrence where he was concerned—but that he had no recollection of anything that had happened during the evening put an idea into her mind which seemed to become more feasible the longer she thought about it.
"Are you still there, Elaine?"
Infusing the appropriate emotion into her voice, Elaine answered softly: "Don't you remember anything about last night, Brett? Don't you even remember…" She seemed to hesitate, and he prompted:
"Is there anything special I ought to remember?"
Her voice trembled effectively. "Unless you don't consider asking me to marry you something special?"
Brett stared at the telephone incredulously, at a loss for words, and it was Elaine's turn to ask: "Are you still there? You do remember, don't you, Brett? We were alone in the garden at Mimi Fawsett's place and you were so sweet that—that I—"
Her unaccustomed diffidence touched him. "Why, of course I remember, Elaine." But although he spoke kindly, his face was blankly incredulous as he uttered the words.
"Darling, I'm so glad! I couldn't have borne it if you'd regretted asking me. I've waited so long! Oh, Brett, hurry up and come over, I'm longing to see you. I must go now, my bath's running, but please don't be long. Au revoir, darling."
Brett replaced the receiver and lay staring at the sun-washed wall at the foot of his bed, cursing himself for a drunken fool. Why hadn't he realized that in the state of mind he was in last night he might do something he would regret? Why hadn't he come home to drink, if drink he must? Why had he ever accepted Elaine's invitation? Why? Why? Why? The fruitless questions hammered in his brain.
He contemplated the idea of going over to see Elaine immediately, and making a clean breast of everything, but he shrank from hurting her, especially as by this time she had probably told her parents, as well as Dickson and—Loris.
Loris! What would her reaction be when she heard about it? Dismissing the bitter hope that she would be as hurt as he had been hurt last night, he wondered whether her vanity would be wounded that he had consoled himself so quickly with someone else. Had she waited for him and wondered why he had not turned up, or had she been so engrossed with Dickson that she had not even noticed or cared that he had not kept his promise? With a groan he got out of bed—if he needed a reason for going on with this farce of an engagement, the idea of hurting Loris would be reason enough in itself.
Elaine felt no compunction at the lie she had told Brett, and his reception of it only filled her with triumph. Ever since they had met she had been determined to marry him, and the fact that she was going to achieve her ambition by means of a lie in no way detracted from her satisfaction.
She, too, wondered what Loris would say when she heard of the engagement, but no remorse stirred her at the thought of having come between two people who, until she had manoeuvred them apart, had obviously been in love with each other. She bathed and dressed quickly, and went downstairs to find her parents so that she could tell them the news before Brett's arrival.
Mr. and Mrs. Loftus were delighted. They had always looked on Brett with affection, and when he arrived, he was immediately shown into the lounge where they greeted him warmly.
"I'm so happy," Mabel Loftus said, kissing him heartily. "I've known for a long time Elaine was in love with you, and it's wonderful to know you feel the same way."
Although he met their congratulations with a polite smile, Brett realized that to ask Elaine to release him was going to be even more difficult than he had imagined.
At that moment there was a sound of children's voices and Timothy and Gillian rushed into the room, slowly followed by Loris, who was walking painfully with the aid of a stick.
"I didn't know you were taking the children over again today, Loris," Elaine said, with unwonted sweetness. "Are you feeling well enough?"
"Yes, thank you, Mrs. Forrest," Loris replied politely, although she did not add that it was only the thought of another long day without anything to do which had made her resume her duties.
"I was going to take them down to the beach," Elaine continued, "but as things have turned out perhaps it's just as well you're in charge again."
Mrs. Loftus saw Loris's puzzled expression and hastened to explain. "You haven't heard my daughter's good news, Loris—she and Brett are going to be married."
In that instant Loris was glad her sleepless night had already given her a pallor, for otherwise the wave of faintness which swept over her would have been noticeable. She clutched the back of a nearby chair to steady herself, and forced a smile to her lips as she turned to Elaine, studiously avoiding Brett's eyes.
"Congratulations, Mrs. Forrest. I hope you'll both be very happy." Then with a little gesture she motioned the children to follow and left the room.
If Brett had expected to gain any satisfaction from Loris's reaction to the news, he was disconcerted to find that far from amusing him, the sight of her white face filled him with distress, and it was only by keeping a firm grip on himself that he refrained from going after her.
But even Mrs. Loftus had noticed Loris's expression, and she remarked on it. "I must say the poor child seemed rather taken aback at the news. For a moment I thought she was going to cry."
Mr. Loftus lit a cigar. "She was probably thinking of Melanie. After all, if it hadn't been for Dickson's accident, it would be her little friend who was getting married."
"Possibly," his daughter murmured ambiguously.
After that, conversation became general, and Brett was thwarted in all his attempts to be alone with Elaine and tell her that the engagement was a mistake, for Mrs. Loftus remained with them all the morning, discussing plans for the wedding.
"There's nothing to stop you getting married as soon as you like," she said happily. "So why not have the wedding before the children go to school?"
"We haven't got as far as making plans yet, Mother—after all we're only just engaged," Elaine protested, although to herself she admitted the wisdom of marrying as soon as possible, doubting whether, once he had had time to think about it, Brett would go through with their marr
iage.
She glanced down at her watch. "Darn! I've got an appointment with the dressmaker at twelve. I think I'll call her up and put it off. I'm too excited to stand still long enough to be pinned!" She flashed Brett a smile. He looked so maddeningly inaccessible that she longed to be in his arms and make him quicken with desire for her, confident in the knowledge that he would not be human if he failed to respond to her own urgent longing.
"I'll come along with you, Elaine," Mrs. Loftus interposed. "If you're calling Thérèse I'll have a word with her at the same time."
Mother and daughter left the room together, and Brett stood up and paced agitatedly backwards and forwards, running nervous fingers through his dark hair. With every passing moment the situation was becoming more and more difficult, and the longer it was allowed to go on the more impossible it would be to extricate himself.
The sound of children's voices drew him out on to the terrace, and he saw Timothy and Gillian playing on the lawn while Loris sat near them, her ankle resting on a stool.
When she had left the lounge her only desire had been to hide, but the children had made it impossible for her to be alone, and she had taken them out into the garden, resolutely controlling her tears.
During a sleepless night she had made up her mind to see Brett and ask him what it was he had intended saying to her last night and why he had not come. It was ridiculous for two intelligent people to go on misunderstanding each other and she would tell him without false pride that she had waited for him all the evening and ask him what had prevented him from keeping his promise.
Now there was no need, for the answer was quite plain. She doubted that he was really in love with Elaine and wondered dully whether he had asked her to marry him to prove to himself that she, Loris, no longer meant anything to him. The widening stream of misunderstanding seemed to bear her away on a flood of misery, and she knew that they were further apart now than they had ever been.
She shifted her ankle gently and tilted the canopy above her deck chair to shade her from the glare of the sun. The heat was so intense that it seemed to throb around her and the lawn and flower-beds shimmered in a haze.
From the terrace Brett stood watching her, and then, almost without thinking, walked down the steps and crossed the lawn.
"Loris, I…" He stopped, for he had no idea what he wanted to say. A pang of anguish shot through him at the sight of the pain in her eyes, and he wanted to gather her into his arms and kiss it away. Ironically, he realized his own folly, because he had committed himself to one woman when his whole being cried out for another, and she because of her love for the man who was engaged to her best friend. How much simpler life would have been if he had not come in upon that scene in the lounge last night! He might have been engaged to Loris this morning, instead of to Elaine, and he wished with all his heart that it was so. Then at least one of them would have been happy, for he knew that just to be with her would be happiness enough for him.
Scarcely conscious of what she was saying, Loris took up the conversation where he had left it in mid-air, intent only on breaking a silence which was becoming unbearable.
"My ankle's much better this morning—I can walk quite well today, whereas yesterday I could only hobble."
"I'm glad. You came downstairs yesterday evening for the first time, didn't you?"
"Yes. Melanie went out with Mr. and Mrs. Loftus, and Dickson and I spent the evening together."
"I know you did. I nearly intruded on your privacy."
She was startled at the harshness of his voice, and replied sharply: "Then I'm glad you didn't. Elaine would have been furious if you'd kept her waiting."
"I had no arrangement to go out with Elaine last night until I saw you and Dickson together."
Loris's voice trembled. "What are you trying to imply?"
"I'm not implying anything, I'm merely stating a fact." His anger was rising. "I'd advise you not to trespass on other people's property."
"When I want your advice I'll ask for it. Up to now, I've managed quite well without it."
"I'm sure you have. But if I were you I'd leave Dickson alone. Or have you no qualms about stealing your best friend's fiancé?"
Suddenly, with startling clarity, Loris realized what he meant, and knew he must have come into the lounge as she was comforting Dickson. Seeing them so close together he had misinterpreted their proximity as an embrace! A scarlet flush of indignation mounted to her cheeks, but Brett read it as a sign of guilt.
"You must have a very low opinion of me to say a thing like that." Her voice trembled as she struggled to control her anger.
"I base my opinions on the evidence of my eyes," he returned icily.
"Then you must be blind."
"I certainly have been. But I'm not any more."
"How dare you!" Loris retorted angrily. "As you seem to think so little of me I'd be glad if you'd leave me alone and go back to your fiancée. We have nothing more to say to each other."
Furiously Brett turned on his heel and strode away.
He reached the lounge just as Elaine and her mother returned, and Mrs. Loftus came straight towards him.
"Edward and I want to give a party to celebrate your engagement, Brett," she announced gaily.
For an instant Brett hesitated, undecided whether or not to stop this thing before it had gone any further. But almost as the thought occurred to him his anger at Loris flared up again and he realized the pointlessness of regaining his freedom. Freedom for what? To go on living the loveless life he had endured for so long? Wasn't it better to take whatever love was offered and fill his life, if not with the substance of his desire, at least with its shadow?
"It's very kind of you," he said stiffly, "but I intended holding a party myself in any case—for Melanie and Dickson—so how about letting me give it as I'd planned and making it out engagement party as well?"
Elaine drew her arm through his and leant against him. "If you're always so considerate, darling, I can see I'm going to be very happy."
He smiled at her briefly. "That's settled then. I'll see about getting the barn fixed up for dancing and we can have a barbecue supper on the lawn."
Mrs. Loftus sighed happily. "Most men never seem to know what kind of party to give. My husband usually leaves it all to me and doesn't care whether it's a picnic or a formal dinner. Thank goodness you know exactly what you want, so all we have to decide on now is who to ask."
"How about giving me a list of the people you'd like to have, and I can add my own friends to it?"
"Elaine can do that for me, Brett. I've got to go and speak to Cook about lunch."
Mrs. Loftus bustled out and for the first time since his arrival at the house Brett was alone with Elaine.
She moved close to him, her hair brushing against his cheek. "You've made me the happiest woman in the world, Brett—or have I said that before?"
Almost against his will he was aware of her heavy intoxicating perfume.
"Elaine, I—"
"Don't say anything to spoil it, darling. Just hold me in your arms." Her voice was languorous. "When you asked me to marry you last night you were so sweet—and humble, too, quite unlike your usual self!" Her imagination started to run away with her. "I'll never forget the wonderful things you said or the way you kissed me."
"I'm sorry if I—"
She silenced him by putting her fingertips over his mouth. "There's no need to be sorry, darling. If you kiss me now like you did then," she whispered, "you'll make me even happier."
Her arms stole up around his neck and he pulled her towards him, seeing in his mind's eye Loris's flushed, guilty face, and with a little groan he sought Elaine's mouth with his own, trying to find forgetfulness in her passionate response. After a moment she drew back with a satisfied sigh and moved over to the mirror, patting her hair complacently as she did so.
Brett lit a cigarette with a hand that shook, thinking that if he wanted to forget Loris, Elaine might after all prove a means of do
ing so. Although he had never realized before how responsive she could be, he felt bleakly that if passion alone could suffice he might at least find solace in her arms.
"Penny for your thoughts, Brett." Their eyes met in the mirror, and throwing away his cigarette he reached out and pulled her roughly towards him again.
"They're not worth a cent," he said thickly, and his mouth came down on hers, hard and demanding, stifling her half-hearted protestations.
In the days that followed Brett was a frequent visitor to the house, for there were a hundred and one details to be settled for the coming party. Melanie received the news of the engagement with mixed feelings, for she had thought Brett was in love with Loris. But when she mentioned the subject Loris's reply was so laconic that she was forced to the conclusion that whatever had happened between Brett and Loris on the boat had meant very little to either of them.
Loris was thankful that the days were fine so that she could keep the children out most of the time and thus avoid seeing Brett. Whenever Timothy knew Brett was coming he would want to be there and Loris became quite adept at getting him out of the house and down to the beach instead. As far as Loris could see, the only good thing about Brett's forthcoming marriage to Elaine was the fact that in Brett the children would have a very good stepfather, and they themselves viewed the prospect with delight, anticipating the pleasure of having an understanding father of their own like their other young friends, and last but by no means least, being able to play in the barn as often as they liked!
Meanwhile preparations for the engagement party went ahead. Although it was being held at Brett's house Elaine still had a lot to do and she saw to it that everyone helped her, with the exception of Loris whom she left strictly alone. But Loris would not have been human if she had not found the constant excitement and anticipation a painful reminder of what it portended, and looked forward to the day when Elaine would leave the house altogether, even though she knew it would be as Brett's wife. Better that than to have to see the beautiful face with its provocative expression and hear the insolent voice continually saying Brett's name; better to know that Brett and Elaine were married and the door on the might-have-been was closed once and for all, than to dream dreams that would never come true.
The Widening Stream Page 10
