Ah, so he didn’t have to explain why she was beside him and that he wasn’t some lech trying to rub knees with her. And yet…she’d made the comment as if she had read his mind. Had he revealed any emotion? Demonstrated any awkwardness or weakness? If so, he would have to watch that. Visible chinks in the armor were unacceptable.
“That’s right. If you were in front of me this close, parts of you would be blurry, but at this angle I can see that you’ve pulled your hair back, you have dangling earrings and you’re wearing a blouse with contrasting buttons. The top one is open.”
Those big gray eyes flew open wide. Jeremy suppressed a smile. “Sorry,” he said. “I couldn’t help noticing, but I probably shouldn’t have mentioned it.”
She lifted her chin, her color high. “No, that’s all right. It helps me to know what the situation is, and I really do need to understand, but…”
He waited. The tension emanating from her was palpable, practically electric. His fingers itched to touch and soothe. With effort he restrained himself.
“Is that how you’re able to run?”
Without thought, he turned toward her even though she blurred a bit more. “Partially, yes. I can see part of the ground and things at the edge. What I can’t see is what’s too far ahead, but the estate is familiar territory and the grounds are well kept. I don’t have to worry about hazards or holes or traffic.”
“I’ve had students who were runners. You have a nice form. I mean—”
He held up his hand to stop her. “I know what you meant. You don’t have to watch your words or worry that I’ll misread anything you say. I think we’ve established that whatever lay in our past is in the past and this is just business. While I find you attractive, I’m not going to jump you.”
For a second she looked startled. “I never thought you would. And…I wouldn’t jump you, either. That is—”
He smiled. “It’s okay, Eden.”
“Not to me, it isn’t. I never stammer anymore. It’s unprofessional, and I’ve trained myself not to. Besides, all I really meant to say was that you could have been a runner on the school team. I can see you’re that good.”
“No. That wouldn’t have happened,” he said with a small smile. “I never stuck to anything that long.” He’d been too busy causing trouble, but there was no reason to say that. They both knew it.
Eden shifted on the seat beside him. Her prim skirt brushed against his leg. An innocent occurrence that connected them for half a second and sent a current of awareness through him. Quickly she smoothed the cloth away, and he controlled the urge to lean closer. She might project a cool, calm demeanor, but there were still traces of the younger, skittish Eden. She’d obviously been hurt by men, and he was her employer, a man she had a right to trust.
“My troublemaking days are over,” he assured her.
“Because of your…”
“My blindness? No. It’s because I choose for them to be over.” Which implied that he might just as easily choose to start them up again.
She nodded. “What else do you do?” she asked, and he saw then that she had pulled out a pad of paper.
He reached out and gently pulled it away. He took her hand and felt her long, slender fingers in his grasp.
“I’ll help you with your research when I can, and I’ll even try the instruments out when it’s necessary, but don’t use me as your model. The things I do—well, it wouldn’t be wise to make those kinds of promises to a child or a parent. I don’t want to be a role model. That’s not me.” And never had been.
He felt her tremble and take a deep breath. “You’re not still the wild one?” she asked, raising her chin as if daring him to answer.
He laughed and gave her back her hand. “Not as wild as I’d like to be. I’m a businessman these days. Boring.”
“We’ll see,” she said with a smile of her own. “And I won’t make any promises I can’t keep to a child. I don’t like disappointing them.”
Something warmed inside him. “Ashley chose well,” he said.
She shrugged. “I’m her cousin, and she knew I needed the money.”
“No. She’s a pro. It’s more than that. Despite your situation, she wouldn’t have recommended you if you weren’t suitable. You care about kids more than the average person, don’t you?”
“I don’t know about that, but I like them a lot. I even plan to have a few of my own, even without a husband. And I want to start a private school where I can help disadvantaged children and make the ones who never feel special realize their potential. So don’t think I won’t consider your children’s needs first. I’ll run everything by you before I make any promises.”
Your children. Jeremy’s breath froze in his throat. He’d never gone so far as to think of them in those terms.
“They’re not mine. I don’t want to stake a claim on those children or have my own. I wouldn’t allow that to happen.”
She bit her lip. “I just meant—I spoke without thinking.”
Jeremy instantly regretted his knee-jerk reaction. He shook his head. “No, I overreacted. But having a family or children…that’s completely out of the picture for me.”
Thank goodness Eden had just told him that she intended to have some. Because while he found her desirable and could tell she wasn’t immune to him, her need to be a parent threw up an impassable barrier that would keep them apart. That was good. It would make working with her in close quarters much easier.
“Jeremy?”
“If you need anything, just ask,” he said. “And if you don’t eat and take care of yourself you won’t be any good for me or for helping the children.” His tone was light, but he meant every word.
Her answering laugh was delicious.
“What?”
“Forgive me, but that was such a pathetic ploy to get me to eat breakfast. I would think that someone who’d been born a rebel would know more about getting a rebellious person to do something,” she said, rising.
He followed her up so that they were both standing. “What do you mean?”
She tilted her head. “When you were a kid breaking all the rules, what would someone have to do or say to persuade you to do things their way?”
He knew what she was trying to do. “Nothing would have persuaded me if I really didn’t want to do something,” he told her in a low, conspiratorial voice.
For half a second she looked disappointed, but then she quickly recovered. “Exactly. And if I don’t want to eat breakfast, you can’t make me.”
He grinned at her.
But Eden was looking aghast. “I didn’t mean that to come out the way it did. That sounded childish, didn’t it?”
“It’s okay, Eden. I know you’re new at this rebellion thing. You always did what was expected of you, didn’t you?”
She frowned. “Always.” And then a triumphant look came over her. “That’s why I need to assert myself now and be a bit more forceful.” She picked up her pad of paper. “No matter what you think the children can and cannot do, I think that matter might be open to speculation. No one should be limited by one person’s opinion. Each person is an individual and some can do more than others, right?”
Okay, now he knew she was trying to manipulate him, but he couldn’t help applauding her tenacity. “I’m sure you’re right, Eden,” he said.
“Now…what other hobbies do you have besides running?” she asked, fishing a pen from the pocket of her skirt.
Appreciating how a woman looks when she believes she’s about to experience something wonderful came to mind.
Irrelevant, he reminded himself. And anyway, she had bested him and deserved to be rewarded for her efforts. “I play basketball when I can get Donald in a free moment,” he said, searching around for one of the less challenging of his activities. Nothing where a child would get hurt.
“Basketball? That’s wonderful.”
“Do you play?”
“No. I’m afraid I’ve never been good at anything physic
al.”
If he’d been drinking coffee he would have choked. As it was, she was the one who looked flustered.
“I mean, I never played sports in school.”
“Then you might have a talent for the physical that you haven’t discovered,” he said.
She looked up at him, blushing furiously. “I might, but I probably won’t find out. Too busy. Work to do.” And she scooted away, headed for his library.
Jeremy wondered which one of them had won that bout, but then he shook his head. Maybe both of them had won. Somehow he had managed not to touch her. Which was, of course, a good thing.
Eden carefully closed the library door behind her, then shut her eyes and slid to the floor. Her heart was racing faster than the winner of the Kentucky Derby. That interlude with Jeremy, all that sparring had been…
Invigorating, exciting. “Dead wrong,” she muttered. He was her boss, not some teenage fantasy crush she was still nurturing. And yet, when he had held her hand, it had been all she could do to sit still. She probably shouldn’t have challenged him. She was out of her league. With Jeremy, and in this town, she had always been out of her league.
But at least I got him to help me. She looked down at the almost-empty sheet of paper. Only one item was listed, but she had added to the knowledge she’d need to help any children. From here on out, she was going to absorb as much as she could by observing Jeremy.
Because while she wanted to escape the crushing weight of debt, the bad memories of this town and the all-too-potent aura of the man, she also did care about the children she would be responsible for guiding into a possibly new and scary life. She really did need to look at things from all angles, and that meant studying the man who was a walking laboratory for her research.
Maybe that was how she should think of him. An experiment, a laboratory subject. But then she thought of his skin against hers when his hand had closed over her fingers and how she had had to look up into those dimming but still-fierce eyes, and everything in her world seemed to narrow to him and her and—
“Okay, not a lab experiment. A man who, unfortunately, makes you hot.” One it was dangerous to stare at too much.
“Too bad, Byars,” she told herself. She had signed on the dotted line. Jeremy Fulton was hers to watch. For now.
CHAPTER FOUR
IT HAD been a reasonably successful week, Jeremy tried to tell himself as he shuffled papers at his desk. The private investigator had met with him and Eden and had reported that he had located a former employee of the sperm bank and hoped to be able to finagle a lead out of that. In addition, Jeremy’s business was going as well as it always had.
So, it wasn’t business that was bothering him right now. It wasn’t even his blindness, at least no more than usual.
It was Eden. All week she’d been there in the background like a mouse waiting for a bit of cheese to drop. She’d had her notebook held tightly against her chest like a shield, and she’d tried her best to fade into the background. No doubt she thought she’d succeeded.
Because I don’t see well was his first angry thought. But he knew it wasn’t that. She just thought…he suspected she’d always thought that she was an invisible person, the kind a man didn’t notice.
To his shame, he had to admit that she had been just that to him when they’d been growing up.
But she wasn’t now.
When he was in the gym lifting weights, his muscles straining to lift as much as he could, he’d sensed her eyes on him. Her light, distinct perfume had drifted to him, sending warmth through his body.
In the pool while he was taking his morning swim, the chlorine had covered her scent, but when he’d emerged from beneath the water, she’d been there leaning against the wall, pen in hand, scribbling.
She’s just trying to gather useful information, you jerk, he told himself, but that hadn’t helped. Aware that she was watching him as an object to be studied, anger rose within him.
And every time he ran, he was conscious of her, always. The sun was on his back, the wind was in his hair and Eden’s gaze followed him. He’d been used to women watching him all his life, but this was different. It was impersonal.
“A good thing,” he told himself, except when he glanced over at her as he passed, he’d been aware of the wind in her hair. For the first time, without the small details to distract him, he’d noticed the long, graceful curve of her neck, the fact that a man’s hand would fit perfectly there in order to pull her closer for a kiss, where perfect vision was unnecessary and only physical sensation mattered.
A curse escaped Jeremy. He had no business thinking of Eden that way. She wasn’t here for his pleasure. If he desired her, it was probably because she was the only woman in his life right now. His lust for her was immaterial. She was studying him only to discern how he functioned and what his limits were so she could convey that to the children’s parents.
But acknowledging that didn’t help his foul mood. No sense sitting here pretending to work when he wasn’t getting anything done. He swung away from his desk, put down the magnifier he hadn’t been using anyway and strode out of his office into the hallway just as the doorbell rang.
Instantly he realized that Donald was off getting the limo serviced and it was Mrs. Ruskin’s day off, so there was no one closer than he was to answer the door. He also became aware of Eden entering the hallway behind him. But she wasn’t a servant and she wasn’t required to greet visitors. No, Eden was the woman who had been treating him like a lab rat all week. If he asked her to open the door and greet whoever was there she would probably pull out that blasted notebook of hers and…
Jeremy frowned. He moved to the door and opened it. The change from the slight darkness of the house to the brilliance of sunshine worked its ugly magic, as he had grown to expect. His malfunctioning eyes took much longer to adjust than they had in the past. For seconds that felt like minutes, he simply stared at the person on the doorstep, trying to make out…something.
And then old habits kicked in. It was time to be outwardly charming. Anything else might be disastrous. Whoever the person was, he didn’t want them to realize he couldn’t see, and maybe, despite everything, he didn’t want Eden to see him like this yet, either. Telling her about his condition for the sake of the task at hand was one thing. Letting her see the worst of his emasculating weakness was another.
He moved forward, looking toward the unknown visitor. “Hello,” he said with a practiced smile. “May I help you?”
For half a second he realized that the person at the door could be carrying a machete or an Uzi and he wouldn’t have a clue. Yet, he was chatting amiably to what was, at least temporarily, a total stranger in order to salvage his pride. And from the momentary silence that ensued, he could tell that he must have made some sort of gaffe.
Suddenly the scent of Eden was much closer. “Miriam, how nice. Come on in. You know Jeremy, he always did like to tease. Acting as if he didn’t know you…”
Although she wasn’t facing him, Jeremy could hear the smile in Eden’s voice as she pretended that he had intentionally spoken to Miriam the way he would have to a stranger.
Miriam?
Jeremy wanted to beat his head against the wall as he realized to whom Eden was referring as his vision began to adjust to the light. Ignoring every protesting instinct in his body, he stepped aside to let Miriam DeAngeles in the door. She was no stranger, but not a friend either, despite the fact—or maybe because of the fact—that he and Miriam had been an item for about two months back in high school.
Recently divorced, back in town and looking for a new diversion, she had shown up once or twice lately to borrow a cup of sugar, she had said, although her house was half a mile away. No doubt she read the business section of the paper and knew that Fulton Enterprises was raking in buckets of money. Knowing the woman for what she was and always had been, Donald had made excuses, telling Miriam that Jeremy was working. But that had been last week. Today Donald wasn’t here, Eden
was unaware of the whole scenario, and…I can’t very well announce to Eden that Miriam is here on a fishing expedition, Jeremy realized.
This was going to be awkward. He was standing here next to Eden, a woman he desired but shouldn’t. On his other side was a woman who wanted his lust but in whom he had no interest. Moreover, Miriam could be dangerous when crossed.
She was capable of dropping hints to the media if she discovered what few people knew, that the owner of the Fulton empire was going blind. He would be besieged. And while the truth would, inevitably, be discerned in time…he didn’t want to think about that. It was difficult enough living with the unknown and wondering how much of his world would be left when the dust settled. Facing a media onslaught? Being observed like a goldfish in a bowl? Being seen as defective or weak? No.
Yet he was the one who had let Miriam in. Bracing for damage control, he stepped forward.
“Hello, Miriam,” he said. “Sorry for putting you on. It’s good to see you.” Although it wasn’t. Miriam was interested in three things only, position, money and gossip, and a better position and more money would always be welcome.
As for gossip? He tried not to visibly react. Miriam was definitely going to wonder what Eden Byars was doing standing beside him welcoming guests almost like a wife.
He waited for the hit, the biting comment.
“Jeremy, hon, I just haven’t seen enough of you lately. None, really. That awful man of yours wouldn’t let me in. Still, I’m here now and you’re looking as edible as ever,” Miriam said, stroking a hand down the length of his sleeve, letting her fingers linger just two seconds too long. No mistaking her intent. Miriam was on the prowl. His vision was adjusting to the light, but Jeremy didn’t need vision for this.
What’s more, he knew what was expected, and giving Miriam what she wanted was probably the quickest way to deflect her rabid curiosity and get rid of her. “Miriam…thank you. You, of course, are looking beautiful, as always.” Which she was, at least on the outside, from what he could see.
Her Millionaire, His Miracle Page 4
