I reach over and turn on the bedside lamp. He wipes his face quickly and starts to pace the room.
“Judd.”
He won’t look at me.
“Judd. Look at me.”
He keeps pacing the room.
“Judd!”
Finally, he looks at me. “Judd, it’s okay. You were having a bad dream.”
His side of the bed is saturated with sweat and his body is coated. He still hasn’t said anything.
“Judd, why don’t you go shower off and I’ll find some clean sheets, okay?”
He nods and walks toward the downstairs bathroom. I walk to the linen closet and find some sheets. I lay him out a clean pair of boxers and I grab a clean shirt for myself. His sweat has part of this shirt soaked.
About thirty minutes later, he returns to the room wrapped in a towel. He looks at me and seems defeated.
“I’m sorry if I scared you, Princess.”
“No, it’s fine. You didn’t scare me.” Well, he did a little, but I’m not telling him that.
He sits down on the sofa with his head in his hands. “I thought maybe I was ready to have someone stay with me, but I guess I’m not. Sometimes the dreams wake me up, sometimes they don’t.”
“Hey, this is okay. You’ve been through a lot, you’re allowed to have some emotions.”
“I know, but I thought maybe since everything felt so right with you that I would sleep, but I guess it’s not meant to happen.”
I sit down by him. “Look, I changed your sheets, go try to rest. I’m gonna go on home.”
“No. I don’t want you driving this late. Please go sleep in the bed, I’m gonna sit here for a little while and watch TV. I seem to sleep better sometimes while I’m watching it and sitting up.”
I nod. I don’t want him to worry about anything else, he has enough on his plate. “Okay. Here, I grabbed you a pair of boxers.” I hand them to him.
He kisses my forehead. “Thanks, Princess.”
Chapter 5
I wake up sitting on the couch with some random movie playing on the TV. Glancing over to the bed, I see my princess curled up sleeping. Last night comes back to me. No one has been around me when I had the nightmares. I definitely haven’t let anyone take care of me like she did.
I have to go talk to my counselor. I need to see if I’ll ever be safe to sleep with someone again or if this is the way it’s going to be.
Walking to the kitchen, I fix myself a small drink to calm my nerves.
I’m going to have to tell her I’m not ready for this, and it’s going to hurt like hell because I want nothing more than to be with her. I’ve got to get all of this figured out with myself, though.
I really need to look at getting my own place. Ryder has been great to me, but some of this I have to work out on my own. Movement startles me out of the corner of my eye.
Annabelle walks in the kitchen. “Hey, how are you feeling this morning?”
“Tired. Look, I’m sorry about last night. You know, if I freaked you out.”
She shakes her head. “No. It’s completely understandable. Have you thought about talking to someone about it?”
“Yes.” I bark out.
She jumps noticeably. “I’m sorry. I was just asking.”
Shit, I scared her. “Sorry. Yes, I’m talking to a counselor about everything. Look, I really want to explore what this is between us, but I think maybe I need a little more readjustment time."
She rubs her hand on my arm. “Maybe you’re right. I just want you to know I’m here for you. I’m gonna go shower real quick and then head home. I’ve got some studying to do today.”
“Okay.” I rub my hand through her hair. “Thanks.”
She leaves me sitting here in the kitchen with my 7am mixed drink.
~*~*~
I’ve been living in the apartment in one of the barns for a few weeks now. I feel better about being out here, less dependent. I help Ryder and my dad out around the farm. Ryder wants to pay me but I won’t let him because I’m living here for free and he’s done so much for me.
I haven’t saw much of Annabelle, I guess she stays pretty busy with her nursing stuff. The counselor had me put on some kind of sleep medicine to help with the nightmares but I don’t see that it works too well, I still have to take several shots before bed so I don’t wake up. I don’t really feel like it’s doing me any good talking to that guy anyway. Once my mandatory sessions are up in a couple of weeks, I’ll probably quit seeing him.
A knock at the door pulls me from my thoughts. Looking through the window, I see it’s Ryder. I open the door.
“Hey, man.”
He smiles back. “Hey, I was gonna see if you could ride into town with me? I gotta pick up a few things for the farm and Nelson is at a doctor’s appointment today.”
I look at him strange. “What’s dad at a doctor’s appointment for?”
He shrugs. “I think it’s just a usual physical or something. He didn’t say.”
I grab my cap. “Yeah, I’ll go.” I make a note to ask my parents what the doctor’s appointment was about.
“So, are you enjoying having your own space out here?”
“Yeah.” I say climbing in to the front seat of the work truck. “It’s nice. It’s not like we ever got in each other’s way in the house, but smaller is better for me. ” I chuckle. “Plus, I don’t run the risk of seeing you and Scarlet having sex God only knows where.”
“Hey, that was one time that we got carried away in the kitchen.”
I laugh. “Um no, that’s the only time that you guys know I saw. I almost walked up on you guys in the pool one night. One night I heard a noise in your dad’s study and went to go check it out only to glimpse the two of you playing some fucked up version of CEO and secretary. Then I about walked in the barn mudroom the other day until I heard Scarlet, you are so fuckin’ tight. Nana’s right, you guys are gonna be shooting kids out soon.”
He starts laughing. “Dude, I’m so sorry. We are just a very romantic couple. What can I say? I’m in love with her and no, no kids anytime soon.”
“Yeah, yeah. I get it. I’m happy for you.”
He smiles. “Thanks. You could still come up to the house more often though. Hell, today’s the first time I’ve laid eyes on you in almost a week.”
I can’t tell him that I like being alone. That I feel more secure this way. “Yeah, I’ve been catching up on some reading.”
I see something lying in the road. “Ryder, slow down!”
He starts slowing down. “What?”
“Go around that!” I point to what looks like a deer maybe.
He looks at me confused. “Okay.” He slowly goes around it. “We okay to speed back up now?”
I shake my head. “Yeah. Sorry. It’s just sometimes dead animals are used to hide IED’s in. I have to remember I’m still getting used to not having to worry about that anymore.”
“Hey, it’s okay, man. It’s gonna take you a little while to get used to everything around here again.”
We pretty much ride in silence the rest of the way into town. I feel like my family and friends keep looking at me like any moment I’m going to lose my shit. If I’m honest, there are days that I feel like I will.
Chapter 6
This ER rotation gets more insane by the day. Last night we had three car wrecks, one attempted suicide, a couple of heart attacks and two meth addicts tearing the damn place up.
I haven’t had much time to do anything other than study and go to work the past couple of weeks. I’ve texted Judd a couple of times but not much else. I’d love for us to pick up where we left off before he deployed, but I have a feeling that’s never going to happen.
I felt so bad for him the morning after his welcome home cookout. He looked so defeated. I know Scarlet said he’s moved into the apartment in the barn.
The funny part is, even with all of the problems he has, I still feel safer with him than anyone else in this world.
<
br /> My mother is constantly bitching about how late I come in from work. My dad has his own snide remarks, but he tries to mask them with sugar coated shit basically.
I’m supposed to go with my family to the cookout at their country club for the fourth of July in a few hours. I really don’t want to, I’d rather go to Scarlet’s. I’ll never hear the end of it, though, if I don’t go with them for at least a little while.
“Annabelle, are you almost ready to go?”
I wish my mother would just go away. “I thought we didn’t have to be there for like three more hours?”
“Yes, but I’ve arranged to have tea with the Wilsons in an hour.”
“Why do I need to be there for that?”
She opens my door without knocking. “Jesus, Annabelle, you aren’t even close to ready. We are having tea with the Wilsons and their son Patrick.”
Fuck, I know what this is. I snatch a light blue dress with a bright red belt out of my closet and a pair of bright red heels. “I’m dressing now, mother. Why do I have to have tea with them?”
“Well, it would be nice for you to meet some young men of our, well, our caliber in society.”
I look at her like she’s lost her mind. “Mother, really, that is complete bullshit.”
“Really, Annabelle, do you have to talk like a sailor? He is a nice young man and he’s already lined up for a position at his father’s firm. He’s an active member at the club and your father really likes him. They play golf together quite regularly.”
Arguing with her at this point is not going to work. “Whatever, I’ll be ready in a few minutes, but I’m driving myself. I’m going to Scarlet’s later for their cookout.”
She rolls her eyes. “Please make sure you do something with your hair and makeup.” She spins around, stomping out of my room.
“Yes, mother.” I call out after her.
~*~*~
Sitting across the table from Patrick Wilson, his parents, and my parents is actually quite painful. I think I would rather go for my annual pap smear. He is completely boring and is stuck so far up my father’s ass I can’t tell where my father ends and Patrick begins. He keeps staring at me. It’s fucking creepy, like some sort of perverted stalker.
“So, Annabelle, what do you do?” His father asks.
“I’m in nursing school and I’m doing my clinical rotations right now.”
“Well, that is a noble profession, I guess.” He comments.
The distain for my noble profession drips off of his tongue. I want to slap the shit out of him. “If you’ll excuse me, I need to use the ladies’ room.” I stand, placing my napkin on the table.
Once I’m in the ladies’ room, I sit on the small sofa. These people drive me insane, they are so hung up on their money that they can’t see anything else. My phone pings, alerting me to a text message.
Judd: R U coming to the farm
2day?
Me: Yes as soon as I can blow off
my parents.
Judd: Good haven’t saw u in a while. Oh and Scar said to bring your ass on.
Me: Tell her to keep her damn hair on. Trust me I’ll be there ASAP. The longer I stay here the more likely I am to end up with a drinking problem and a prescription habit. LOL
Judd: Good to know C U Soon.
Me: : )
I need to figure out some way to blow this hot dog stand early. I don’t know how much longer I can sit with the HobSnob family and mine.
My brothers Gregory, Shane, Victor and Christian are due here soon and it’s only going to get worse. Vic and Chris are okay, they’re still intimidated by my dad, but Greg and Shane are his cronies. They are my dad’s little Dudley Do-Rights. Vic and I are the only ones who branched out from my father’s firm. Vic is in medical school and Chris wanted to go to med school, but he couldn’t bring himself to do it. He did, however, go to work for a different firm.
Walking back out to my parents’ table, I realize that I’m too late, two of my brothers are already here. Gregory and Shane give me a made for TV hug as I walk up. I smile. I wish it were Vic and Chris, they at least have some normal tendencies. We all look like we’ve been carved out of cream cheese or something.
Finally, I’m released to mingle around. Thank God, because if I have to listen to the Wilson’s and my family talk anymore about bottom lines and mergers, I’m going to puke. I see the youngest of my brothers, Chris, standing by the bar. I walk over to him. “Hey, brother. Didn’t see you come in.”
“Are mom and dad really making you sit with Patrick Wilson? You know he’s a prick, right?”
I cringe at the thought of him. I let a big breath out, take the drink from my brother’s hand and start drinking it. “Yeah. He’s kinda creepy and I’m about to go crazy. I’m ready to leave here. Is Vic coming?”
He looks over at me slyly. “He’s here somewhere. I think he’s seeing one of the cart girls and they are currently busy.” He smiles.
My mouth opens and closes. “So, is he really dating this girl or is he just getting his rocks off?”
He shrugs as he takes a sip of his new drink. “I think he really likes her. Just, you know how mom and dad are. I don’t think he’s ready for their scrutiny yet.”
“Ah. I see. What about you? Any nice young ladies in your sights? We never get a chance to talk without everyone around.”
“Yes. I’m seeing a girl from my office, Angie. I definitely wasn’t bringing her here though, but I’m going to see her in a little bit.”
“You know dad is still acting like a freaking wounded bird about you deciding to work for someone else?”
“What the fuck does he expect? I’d have to wait behind his two clones, Greg and Shane. Those two would make my life a living hell.”
“You should have went to med school like Vic.”
“Yeah. You know, I’ve thought about going back. I have all of my pre-reqs.”
“Wow, really? You should do it. I mean, Mr. Wilson would tell you that is ‘noble’ profession.”
He looks at me confused. “What?”
I roll my eyes. “That’s what he told me about nursing.”
“Did you tell him to go suck a dick?”
I shake my head. “No. But can you see our mother’s face if I would have?”
He laughs. “She probably would’ve choked on the olive in her martini. She’s probably on what, number six by now?” He sits his drink down. “Let’s get out of here. You want to?”
I put my finger on my chin. “Um, let me think…yes. You text mom some shit to get us out of here. Tell them you need my help, then go grab your girl. Meet me at the Abbott’s, Scarlet and Ryder are having a cookout for the fourth.”
He grins. “Sounds good. Do we need to grab anything?”
“Just whatever you want to drink.”
He nods, heading out the door. I run out to my car, making sure I threw my bag with a change of clothes in the backseat. As I’m about to get in, I feel a hand on my arm.
I spin around to see Patrick Wilson. “You aren’t leaving, are you?”
“Um yeah, I’m going to help my brother Chris with something. I may be back in a little bit.” A bald-faced lie, but maybe it’ll make him go away.
“I was hoping we could go have an unchaperoned drink together.”
I try to smile, even though I want to throw up. “Maybe later, after I help Chris.”
He touches my arm again. “Really? I think your parent’s wanted you to stay.”
I pull my arm away. “Well really, I think I’ll be going.”
About that time, Vic steps up. “Is there a problem here?”
I look up at Vic. “Well, I was just trying to leave. I have to go meet Chris somewhere.”
Patrick looks at Vic. “I don’t think your parent’s wanted her to go.”
Vic looks at him and cocks a grin. “Well, it seems to me she’s a grown woman. I’d suggest you let her go, Chris will be expecting her.”
Patrick nods and walks away.
Vic looks at me. “Where are you really going?”
“To Scarlet’s for a cookout. Grab your mystery girl and come on over.”
He chuckles. “Chris told you.”
“Yeah. He’s gone to go get his girl now. They’re going to meet me at Scarlet’s.”
“Well, Kari doesn’t get off until six. Think it’ll be okay if we come after that?”
“Yeah, that’ll be fine. It’s only a couple of more hours.” I jump in my car, wave to my brother, and head off to Scarlet’s.
Chapter 7
I really wish Ryder hadn’t invited all of these people. I know he always does a big party for the fourth, but I’d just like something a little lower key.
I’m ready for my Princess to get here, that way maybe we could escape for a little while.
“Hey, buddy.” A guy I knew growing up named Josh says. He’s already well into a case of beer.
“Hey, man. How’s it going?” I shake his hand.
“Good, man. Welcome home.”
“Thanks.”
Princess walks up to me and smiles. I look down at her. She’s gorgeous wearing a dress with a pair of awesome fuck me red heels. “Hey, I was wondering when you were going to get here, beautiful.”
“I got here as quick as I could.”
“Josh, this is my friend Annabelle. Annabelle, this is Josh, he grew up just down the road.”
Princess smiles. “Hey.”
“Damn Judd, you got you one of those high class girls.”
I try to ignore him and so does Princess. Then he looks at me. “So, how many of those rag head mother fuckers did you get to kill while you were over yonder?”
Before I can say a word, Princess slaps the shit out of him across the face.
He looks at her. “What the fuck, bitch?”
Everyone at the party starts looking, and Ryder and Scarlet make their way over to us.
Ryder looks around. “What’s going on?”
Princess looks up at Ryder. “Well, this boy needs to learn some manners.” She looks at Josh. “That was rude, you son of a bitch.”
After all of the story gets hashed out, Ryder asks Josh’s brother to take him home.
Secrets in Battle: Secrets of Savannah Series Book 3 Page 3
