I’m confused. “What?”
“Taking in most of his conversation, my father had been telling them that I was engaged to Patrick Wilson. After everything that happened, he said that Patrick and I had split up. The man is insane.”
I shake my head. “I’m so sorry. What else did the man say?”
“He said that he’s sorry that many of the investors are leaving my dad’s firm. He’s worried that my father will lose it all. I feel like this is somehow my fault. I know that’s crazy, I shouldn’t care.”
I rub her hair. “Hey, that’s not your fault. Don’t think about it. I know that’s hard for you because somehow, even with those people as parents, you have a heart, but you can’t let this all bring you down. They failed you, remember that.”
I’d love to kick her dad’s ass for putting all of these thoughts in her pretty little head.
I pull her tighter to my chest. “You’re perfect. Don’t let anyone ever tell you different.”
Chapter 28
How did I end up with someone like Judd caring about me? Sitting here in his lap on the hay bales, I look up at him. “No, you’re perfect.”
He snorts. “I’m far from perfect. Hell, I can’t even go to a Braves game without losing my shit.”
“Hey, don’t talk about yourself that way.”
He nods. “Well, you don’t talk bad about yourself, either.”
“You know, you look kinda sexy in this suit. I was thinking all kinds of naughty things while we were standing up front.”
I see his Adam’s apple move. He dips his head into my neck. “Well, I was thinking how beautiful you were.” He licks my neck. “And how I’d love nothing more than to rip this beautiful dress off you.”
“Oh, well I’m glad you didn’t. You know, since there was a preacher there and all.”
He rolls us so that I’m lying back on the hay and he’s on top of me. He’s gently holding my hands above my head. He runs his hand up my thigh. “You are so damn sexy.” He leans down taking my mouth with his. “God, I’ve missed you.”
I try to touch his face. He shakes his head. “Nope, keep your hands up here.” He holds my hands above my head.
I giggle. “Oh, so you did read the books.”
He takes one hand and pulls down my top, revealing my breasts. Putting his mouth on my breast, he talks as he’s licking. “Did you ever doubt me?”
I shake my head. “No.” Looking into his eyes, I ask. “Are you sure we’re ready?”
He nods. “Yes.”
He lets go of my hands and reaches under my dress, grabbing my panties and tearing them off. He bites my nipple a little roughly. “Oh!”
I reach for his shirt, ripping the buttons open. He removes his hands just long enough to shrug out of his shirt and quickly undo his pants. He shoves his pants and briefs down, settling back in between my legs.
Pulling my nipple back into his mouth roughly, I cry out again. My senses are on overload. I hear someone’s laughter outside. I stop. “Judd, someone could walk in.”
He looks down at me through a lust filled haze and nips at my collar bone. “I don’t care.” He thrusts into me without warning. “God, I’ve missed you. I’ve missed us.”
All thoughts of the person on the outside of the barn are gone. I’m so wrapped up in the passion of this moment. “Me, too.” That’s all I can manage to say.
He reaches back up, placing my hands back above my head. “Tonight I’m in control. Leave your hands above your head.” He takes his hands away, grabbing at my hips.
He thrusts hard back into me.
“Oh, fuck. Judd, please. I need to come.”
He licks at my nipples as he thrusts into me. “You will, just be patient.”
“I can’t. I can’t.”
He looks down at me with total control. “Oh, you can and you will. Don’t come until I say.”
He starts pounding into me harder. As always, he has me stretched to what I feel is my limit. I feel his cock pulsating and I know he’s getting close.
With rapid movements he sits back on his heels, pulling me with him. He makes quick hard thrusts and from this angle it feels as if he may break me.
Suddenly, I’m down on my back again. “Now, Princess.”
As I come he pumps a final thrust into me, coming himself. “I love you, Princess.”
I nod. “I love you, too.”
~*~*~
Waking up in Judd’s bed this morning was just as fun filled as passing out in it last night was.
After having wild passionate sex in the barn, we made our way back to his apartment for a few more rounds. This morning, I woke up with his head between my legs. After screaming his name, I smile at him. “You are very good at that.”
He smiles. “I can say the same thing about several of the things you do.”
I giggle. “Hmm. Thank you.” I roll over and he smacks me on the ass. “Ouch.”
He laughs. “We better get up and go see the newlyweds before they leave for their honeymoon.”
I laugh. “Yeah, Nana said she’s doing a big family breakfast for their send off.”
About that time my phone pings.
Scarlet: Get your skinny ass over here I leave soon and breakfast is ready.
Me: Wow I thought you should be bridezilla before the wedding not after.
Scarlet: Well this bride has a hangover. She is also ready to go start her honeymoon with all of the new toys she’s been keeping her new husband from breaking out this week.
Me: Alright keep your panties on we’ll be there in a second.
“We’d better get going. That was Scarlet, she’s ready to hit the road.”
He laughs as we get dressed. He pulls me in for a kiss. “Yeah, I kinda worked up an appetite anyway.”
“Mmm. Me, too.”
Chapter 29
Ryder and Scarlet have been on their honeymoon in the Keys for almost a week. Originally they were only supposed to be gone a week, but they’ve decided to stay an extra few days.
Annabelle and I have been spending a lot of time together. I’ve stayed with her in the main house most of the time. Her bed is bigger. What can I say? We needed room to play.
I think she’s stolen my dog, though. Beau cuddles with her all the time. He still helps me, though, if I have a dream that wakes me up.
We have a few cows that are about to have calves so I’ve been riding the fields each day checking on them. There are a couple that I need to get moved back closer to the main barn. I’m headed back there now to get what I need and see if Dad can help me. It’s really a two man job.
As I pull up to the barn, I see an odd vehicle. I walk up to the doors of the barn and see a ghost from my past.
Princess sees me come in and smiles. “Hey, Judd. Mack here says he’s been trying to get in touch with you for months. I told him I had no idea that you’d forgotten how to return phone calls.”
Mack looks over at me and grins. “I told her to give you a break. Phones can be complicated things for a guy like you.”
I shake my head. “Yeah, yeah. Whatever, smartass.”
Princess smiles. “Okay, well you guys have some catching up to do. I’m going to go in and study for a little bit.”
I kiss her on the lips. “See you in a bit. Oh, can you call my dad and ask him if he can help me gather a few pregnant cows this afternoon?”
She nods and heads back up to the main house.
I look at Mack. “You want a beer?” I say reaching into the barn fridge.
“Yeah, man. That’d be good.”
I hand him a beer and he looks at me. “So, Hughes. What gives?”
I shrug. “What do you mean?”
Suddenly he rolls his wheelchair my way. “I mean why in the hell are you avoiding me?”
I shake my head. “I’m sorry, man. I really didn’t mean to. I’ve been having a rough time. I’ve been having some attacks and some dreams. I’m seeing a counselor and using a dog for PTSD.”
He nods. “I’ve done the same. I wanted to come and talk to you. My therapist asked me something one day and I had to come talk to you.” He looks down. “He asked me if I held ill feelings toward you. He pushed. He asked if I blamed you for what happened since you were in NCOIC.” He shakes his head and I stop him.
“Mack, it’s okay. I am to blame, I made that call that day. I live with it every night. I hear all of your screams. I smell the smell.”
He throws his beer to the ground. “Damn it, Hughes! This is why I’m here. I came here to tell you, YOU ARE NOT TO BLAME! None of us were. We made the best decisions we could on the information and training we had. When you wouldn’t call me back, I knew you were blaming yourself because that’s the kind of guy you are. Judd, damn it, don’t blame yourself.”
“How can you not blame me? I made those calls.”
He shakes his head. “You never made those calls alone and you know that.”
I just stand there for a few minutes letting his words sink in, until a relief washes over me. Once we pass over that hurdle, we talk and catch up on our lives.
After Mack leaves, my dad comes to help me with the cows. I realize while I’m out working that Nana was right. She told me I’d know when it was time to tell Princess, and it’s time.
Once we finish up with the cows, I make my way into the main house to talk to her. She smiles when I come in. She has supper fixed and it smells wonderful. I kiss her cheek. “Hey, Princess. What did you fix?”
“Oh, just some spaghetti. That way I can take left overs in tomorrow. I’m so glad to be on day shift for a little while.”
“Oh, yeah.” I pull her tight against me. “Well I am, too.”
She nervously looks back at the pot and starts to stir the bubbling sauce. “So how was your friend Mack?”
I nod. “He was great. He came to talk to me about some issues.” I place my hands on her shoulders. “I want to tell you what happened. But after we eat, I’m starving.”
She turns to me with tears in her eyes. “I’m so glad.”
We finish supper and make our way into the den to talk. Once we sit, I lean forward, placing my elbows on my knees. “I’ve never told anyone but Luca this story.” She nods.
I think back to that day.
“We had orders to go out on a patrol. It was to a nearby town. We were supposed to pick up a high profile Afghan official. He was going to do some informing, but we were supposed to make it look like a government snatch and grab, so his people were clued in. I was the NCOIC. Sorry. I was the Non-Commissioned officer in charge. Basically, the sergeant in charge. We pulled off the grab with preciseness. The route we were to take back out of the town had a wreck that was blocking traffic. I made the call not to investigate the normal route, for us to take the alternate route. Once we headed down the alternate route, a large truck pulled out in front of us blocking the street. Before we could back up, we were ambushed. Guns, grenades, you name it, they lobbed it at us. The official we’d been sent in for died. A few of my men died. Mack and two other guys lost limbs. A few of us were ate up with shrapnel. By the time help got there, I lost a couple of the shrapnel victims. I was hit in my lower back and legs. The doctors in Germany said a few more inches and I would have joined Mack with a wheelchair or bled to death.”
I stop and look at her. She’s crying and up until this moment, I didn’t realize I was, too. “There are nights I dream about it. I’m still trying to help them. I can smell the burning flesh and gun powder when I wake up. I hear their screams. My heart aches and races like I’m still trying to tie off Mack’s legs to keep him from bleeding to death. I’ve blamed myself for a while. I made the call to take the alternate route. Today, Mack came to find me and make sure I wasn’t blaming myself and to let me know that he doesn’t blame me, either. I’ve avoided him the entire time I’ve been home because I was scared. I was scared that he hated me. Here I am, walking around and living a normal life. All the while, he’s in a wheelchair with his legs amputated from the knees down. I felt so guilty for so long. Seeing him today helped me let go of some of that. I’m praying this helps me move on just a little bit. Some days, I wake up and I see a stranger in the mirror. I’ve never had this pent up stress and all of these emotions before in my life. I was always in control and now I’m like a fucking ball of nerves. I just need you to understand what you’re getting yourself into.”
She smiles. “Thank you for telling me. I’m not going to push you. I just want you to know that whenever you need to get something off of your chest, I’m here. I love you, just like you are, and I hope I never come that close to losing you again.”
I pull her into my lap and wrap her up in a hug. I kiss her hard. “I love you, too.”
Chapter 30
Since the night Judd told me about the mission that led to his injury, we have been inseparable. Well, whenever we aren’t working, that is. Which here lately we’ve both been working a lot. He’s been crazy busy with calves being born, and I’ve been wrapped up at the hospital and working with Nana.
With Ryder and Scarlet getting back a few days ago, we’ve been staying in the apartment more. It’s like I have to have him to sleep and he’s the same. It feels kinda weird since I’m a house guest there to have someone staying with me. Plus, no one, and I mean no one, wants to accidently witness those two.
The stories Scar shared with me from her honeymoon make me blush. It’s funny to think about the fact that just over a year ago, my friend was a virgin. She met Ryder and went coo coo crazy for him. I went to school with Ryder and in the past year I’ve learned more about him than in our entire past. Like he’s pierced, I could have gone my entire life without knowing that. Scarlet tells me about the amazing orgasms it brings on. To be honest, though, I’m glad Judd isn’t. He’s so damn big that if he added anything metal, it may puncture my womb.
I’m on my way to Nana’s now for one of our sessions. Her stories always crack me up, but today I need to talk with her about Judd. I need to tell someone that he’s told me everything.
I don’t want to tell Scarlet and Ryder because that feels like gossiping. With Nana it doesn’t feel like gossip, it feels like asking for wisdom.
Pulling up to her house on the ranger, she’s sitting on the back porch smoking those damn Pall Malls.
“Hey, old lady, you ready to get started for today?”
She laughs. “I might be old but it’s better than the alternative.”
I laugh and nod. “True. True.”
She gets up and we go in the house. She hands me a couple of stacks of journals. “These are the latest ones I’ve been through. I ear marked some pages.”
I flip through the books. “Thanks, this makes it super easy.”
She sits down in her recliner. “So, baby, what’s on your mind? You have that scrunched up look on your face that says you have something on that brain of yours.”
I sit down on the couch across from her. I start wringing my hands together. “Judd’s friend, Mack, stopped by the other day. They spent some time together for the afternoon. Mack is in a wheelchair, he was with Judd the day he was injured.”
Nana’s face frowns and I know she’s thinking about the day that we got that call. “So, was his friend okay?”
I nod and sigh. “Yes, ma’am. It actually did Judd some good to see him. I didn’t realize that he’d been avoiding those guys. He told me what happened that day. It’s hard to explain, but it’s like a weight hast been lifted between us.”
She looks around the room, trying to not get upset. “I’m so glad he finally talked to you. I knew he’d tell you when he was ready. I was beginning to worry if he’d ever be ready.” She reaches over and squeezes my hand. “You’re good for him.”
I smile. “Thanks.”
She lets her hand fall in her lap. “Alright, let’s get to work.”
I laugh and pull out my laptop. I get the file open I’ve been working in and look to Nana for her to start.
She laughs
and starts her story.
“You know Ryder gets his personality from his grandfather. Grayton was always that ‘bad boy with a heart of gold’. I remember the day he came to school on a motorcycle for the first time. I had just turned 15 earlier that month. It was April of 1949. Just watching him pull into school on that motorcycle did all kinds of things to my girl parts that, at the time, I didn’t understand. He was a couple of years older than me and even though we’d know each other my entire life, I was pretty sure he thought I was just a pain in the ass.”
She stops and smiles, shaking her head in a memory. “But that day he asked me if I wanted a ride home.”
She looks back at me seriously. “Now, I wanted to say yes. I felt dumber than dirt for not saying yes, but if my daddy would’ve found out I was riding on his motorcycle, he’d have tanned my hide. Plus, if I’d have pulled up in the yard with my dress clad legs wrapped around him on a motorcycle, my momma would have fainted.”
She smiles again. “Don’t get me wrong, he wasn’t all sweet and innocent. Like I said, everyone liked Grayton, but he had a little rebel side to him. He could be a cocky bastard, though. He had every girl in the damn school chasing his cute Levi covered ass, but I just wanted him to be mine one day. I could see Grayton growing up to be like Humphrey Bogart, all classy, but with Southern Sweetness.”
Looking over at Nana, she’s lost in her thoughts. “Nana, I’m gonna go grab a glass of sweet tea, you want some?”
“I made some fresh lemonade. I’d like a glass of that.”
I grab our glasses and come back to the living room with her. “Here you go. So how did you and Grayton finally hook up?”
She laughs. “Well, I wouldn’t call it hooking up.”
She sits her glass of lemonade down and starts back talking.
“Well, that same year, summer had just started. I had went with Momma and Daddy to Atlanta for some cattle conference. I had saved up all my money from odd chores and babysitting. I took that money and snuck off to buy my first bikini. Now, it would be considered nothing by today’s standards, but back in them days...” She shakes her head. “My daddy would have never let me leave the house again. So I waited until we got back home. I was shy about going in front of my friends in it. I was ballsy, but I wasn’t that ballsy. So I snuck off to the spring behind our house one day. Our property joined this property behind there. There I was, swimming and having a good old time by myself in my bikini, when someone dove in the water with me. I screamed. It scared me more than a holiness preacher layin’ hands at a tent revival. A sandy blonde head popped up out of the water. It was Grayton. He swam over to me and said, ‘Did I scare you, Pearlie Mae?’ I looked at him and called him an ass. He smirked and swam closer to me. With the water being crystal clear, I knew he could see the blue striped bikini I was wearing. He grinned. ‘Nice swimsuit. Your Daddy know you got that on?’ I smirked back at him. ‘No, you gonna tell ‘em?’ He laughed and said. ‘No, I like the way it looks too much to do that.’ He gave me a wicked grin and pulled me in for a kiss. That was my first kiss.”
Secrets in Battle: Secrets of Savannah Series Book 3 Page 11
