by Lauren Wood
I made a sound as his fingers brushed over my hardened nipples. “What are you really doing here Meri?”
“What do you mean?”
“I mean that you are all warm and soft in my arms. I can’t think of anything right now, so am I reading this wrong? Are you ready to take me up on my offer to make it all better?”
I bit my lip and pressed my ass back against the hardness that sprouted from in between his legs. I moved back and ground myself against him until I thought it was pretty clear what it was that I wanted. I wanted him inside of me, where I yearned to be touched the most. That was all I could think about. Why couldn’t he get that? I didn’t want to have to say it out loud.
His hand moved over one breast and he squeezed it gently, like he was testing out the waters. I didn’t stop him and that was as close to an answer as he was going to get. I was sick of waiting. I had been waiting my whole life to feel this way and it seemed as good of a time as any.
“Meri, your body feels perfect against me.”
He pulled me tighter to him, every inch of me was covered by every inch of him and it was perfect. He did fit so nicely next to me, like that was what was supposed to happen. It was as if everything had led up to this and I was done trying to put off the inevitable. It was Sam that I wanted, no matter how he was brought into my life.
His hands were everywhere, pulling away all thoughts I had of him. I couldn’t think when he was touching me. All I could do was feel. His fingers were pulling on a nipple, while more moved down my stomach to the place between my legs. I was so hot there, his touch lighting a fire inside of me that was impossible to control. Even if I had wanted to, there was no way that it would have happened any other way. This was fate in the making.
Sam turned me around, kissing my lips and making my heated core grind against his hardness. He pulled me on top of him and I finally straddled his thighs to keep myself upright. It was wobbly up there and I didn’t know how to stop myself from falling over, his body underneath me not static at all. He was thrusting up with his covered cock, while I tried to keep my balance. Finally he just yanked me down till my breasts pressed against his chest. His lips captured mine and promised to never let go. I was lost in the moment with him.
Things moved quickly after that and I don’t know where it all changed. My clothes were off before I knew what was happening and instead of feeling his hard meat through the clothing, it was not hotter than ever, a searing rod burning my inner thighs. I as now beneath him, feeling the large man cover me completely.
“God you are so ready for me Meri. I don’t think I can wait any longer. I need you now.”
My arms went over him and I knew then that this was the moment. This was the moment that everything was going to change. His words came mere moments before I felt the sharpest pain I think I had ever felt before. It was Sam pushing through my innocence and I called out, trying to stifle the sound coming out of me, but it was impossible.
Sam paused on top of me and looked at me with surprise. “What just happened?”
I giggled and told him that he was my first. I thought it was rather obvious, but Sam was still stunned. He froze so long that the pain had long since subsided and now I wanted more. He felt good inside of me, but I wanted him to move, to slide in and out like I knew he was supposed to.
Squeezing the thickness inside of me, I heard him groan and I did it again to see if it was a fluke. He grunted and pressed his hands down on my hips, like that was somehow going to stop what was going on with my inner walls. He couldn’t stop what my inner muscles wanted to do.
“You have to stop Meri. You are going to make me lose my cool.”
It sounded a little scary, but it was like an unanswered promise as well. I wanted him to lose the control that held him above me, his arms shaking. I knew that I wanted all of him and I pulled him down for a kiss, while my insides massaged him. If he wasn’t going to move, I was going to have to make him.
Sam pushed in quickly, slamming into me with all of his might and I no longer wanted to tease him. If I thought I was full before, now it was far worse than I could have imagined. This whole time, there was another inch or two that I didn’t know existed.
I cursed and he chuckled. “I warned you.”
“All I heard was promises.”
I really didn’t know what I was asking for, but now all I could think about was Sam. He was inside of me, taking me over and there was nothing that I could do about it. I became one with him in those moments and each time he thrust inside of me, I fell deeper into his spell.
My body exploded, as well as my mind. I couldn’t think straight and all there was right then was Sam. Clinging to him, I went from one pleasure wave to another. Eventually it was I that had to push back from him. He was just too much and I couldn’t stop the way I felt anymore. “God, I love you Sam.”
A second later he was shooting deep inside of me and I hoped that he didn’t hear my declaration in the moment. I meant it, I really did, but I knew that it was too soon. I shouldn’t have said it, but I passed out in his arms before I could really think about it too much.
This is what is was supposed to feel like.
Chapter 10
Sam
I stayed up listening to her even breathing for some time. The tiny woman was curled against my chest, her curved body touching mine. I wanted her again, hell needed her again desperately, but it had not worked out the way that I thought it would. I had assumed so many things, that I now knew were wrong. I was her first and I heard the soft words uttered right before I came. I had really messed up this time.
Getting up, I went to the phone that I had been ignoring all day. It wasn’t like I wasn’t worried about what was going on back home, but I just wanted some time together. I wanted to be with Meri all on my own, just me and her. It was all I could think about and the more I tried to push the thoughts away, the harder it was to do that.
My phone had so many missed calls. I had done my best to postpone the court date next week, but it looked like my assistant wasn’t able to make it happen. That meant that I had just four days, two of those non-business days to get me and Meri back home. It may have well been impossible, but I knew that I wasn’t going to leave her here. I was going to be in Thailand until she left. I owed her at least that much. There was so much that she wanted from me, most likely expected from me, but it would never happen. I was not the man of her dreams. I was not a man worthy of love.
Going back into the hotel, I stayed downstairs for a while, trying to get my head on straight.
“You look lonely.”
The same woman that I had seen every day since I had been here finally spoke to me again. She sounded even younger than she looked.
“No, I am not lonely, but thank you.”
She was surprised to be turned down, much like I had felt when Meri had done the same thing to me. “You are beautiful, but I cannot.” It was strange that I felt like I even had to give an excuse, though I knew what it could do to someone’s ego, what it had done to mine.
Going back upstairs, I didn’t look back at the temptation. Now was I not able to indulge? Was this night the start of the end? Relationships, marriage were the end. I had never seen one work and I told myself years ago that I wouldn’t play the game. Why have one woman, when you can have them all?
I slipped back into the fold out bed that she was lying in. Meri was still naked, her body was half exposed by the sheet at the bottom of the bed and I was left hypnotized by how good she looked. I wanted her again, desperately and I moved closer, hoping that I could awaken the woman and her desires one more time. I had thought that one time would be enough. I just needed to feel her and taste her that once to get her off of my mind. But it hadn’t worked at all. I wanted her even more than ever before and the more I tried to fight it, the worse off I was.
She moaned as I kissed her neck, her ass backing up against me. Meri wasn’t even all the way awake, but her body had already agreed to my pl
an. She wanted me, I could feel it and it didn’t take long to wake her up and convince her. I pulled her on top of me and entered her slowly. She was sore, I knew that I had to take it slow, but it was Meri that pushed for more. I had created a monster and it was I that was drained dry an hour later.
***
We did what we could to search for Carol and by Sunday we had a lead that was promising. My mind had shifted from the woman I was helping, to actually helping her. With my career on the line, I had to find Carol and get this all straightened out.
She was supposed to be working at a type of whore house outside of the city. I went without Meri, while she was sleeping to see if I could get eyes on Carol. It wasn’t that hard to recognize her and before I knew what was happening, I had her out of the dank house and back to the hotel with me. Carol was not okay. They had been giving her something and I found a doctor to see to her. I needed her at least with it enough to take to the police station for identity purposes.
It all was working out and that didn’t make sense to me. Nothing was ever this easy, but by the evening of Sunday, Carol and Meri were talking about everything and I had a good feeling that everything was going to end the way it was supposed to. We would be back in the States tomorrow and from there, I don’t know. I was still trying to decide what I was going to do about Meri. I had a feeling that she expected something to come of this trip. She was going to be expect me to be with her. The problem was, I was not with anyone.
The hotel was still booked, so the girls stayed in the bedroom and I was left alone with my thoughts out on the couch. I heard the door open and several times I thought it was Meri sneaking into bed with me, but she never came and I finally went to sleep.
When I was awaken later, it was Meri and she wasn’t wearing any clothes.
“Another bad dream?”
“No, it just occurred to me that we would most likely be leaving tomorrow.”
“Uh huh.”
“So I was thinking that maybe you would want to do something our last night here?”
There was no talk of what happened next, but there really didn’t need to be. I could see in her eyes that she wanted more, but at the moment I was unable to give her that. I couldn’t see past the naked woman standing in front of me. Her body was still pure perfection and instead of answering her, I lifted the sheet back and invited her in with me. I promised to keep her warm.
Meri moved against me like a moth to a flame and I could feel all of her wonderful curves up against me. Her nipples were already hard, pressing back against my hot skin. It wasn’t long before I was as naked as she was, pumping into the woman that I knew was all mine. When had I ever been able to say that before? Meri was all mine, every inch and as I laid down next to her and pulled her close, I realized that I didn’t want anyone else to ever have her. I didn’t want her, not in the way that she would want, but the idea of another man touching her put my stomach to tilt.
“What happens when we leave Sam?”
“What do you mean?” Were we already having this conversation?
“I mean, what happens with us when we get back to New York.”
It was the moment of truth and I should have been honest.
I wasn’t the type of guy that was okay being with only one woman. I was a man that still had some wild oats to sow and even though it had been magical here with Meri, I knew that reality had to sink in eventually. I would get back to New York and I was sure that I was going to fall back into my old self. There was too much temptation there to think that anything was going to be different.
“I don’t want to think about what happens after tonight Meri. I just want to enjoy this moment with you. You are going home and I know that it is going to be a lot for you right now. We will get together after the dust settles and see where we are.”
It wasn’t what she wanted to hear. That was more than obvious by the way she was looking at me. I wanted to smooth it over and I pulled her to me for a kiss. I knew that she wasn’t going to be able to resist me, no matter how badly she wanted to. She could be mad at me in the morning, but tonight I wanted that look of lust back in Meri’s eyes. She was vulnerable and I was going to have to be gentle letting her down. I would make it easy. I was her first after all.
Chapter 11
Meri
The night was a blur and Sam kept me up most of it. When I had asked him what came next, I could tell by the way he answered me that he hadn’t even thought about it. It hurt my feelings a little bit, but at the end of the day I knew that it was going to be that way. I shouldn’t expect more.
So I tried to pull myself together, like our awkward conversation about the future didn’t happen at all and I was thankful for that. It made it easier to look at Sam in the morning. He was handsome, so damn hot and even though he wanted to have a quickie, I was beyond sore and didn’t want to muck with my heart any more than it was already being done. I didn’t want to lose my heart to Sam. I had already given him my body and that was just going to have to be enough.
“Are you ready for today Meri?”
I was out of the shower and he was getting dressed. Carol was still sleeping and I was about to get her up. I stopped, looking at the man in front of me. I wanted to remember every single line on his body to remember it for later. He was just that hot and sexy. I would have never thought that a guy like him would have been interested in a girl like me. It made more sense here than in New York though.
“Yes I am. I know that Carol is ready to get home. I don’t know how to thank you Sam. You have done more than I could have ever imagined.”
“Don’t thank me just yet. You aren’t out of here yet, but besides, it was all because of Ashlyn.”
“Yeah, I am going to have to pay her back to. It was one thing for her to pay for me to go to college, but this is too much.”
“She paid for you to go to college?”
I shook my head and then tightened the towel around my body. He was given me far too much attention and it was making me nervous. I didn’t want to point it out, but I was going to have to because I couldn’t think otherwise.
“Yeah, she said it was payback because I helped her, but I think it was just because I reminded her of herself when she was younger. She doesn’t have much family, so she made her own. I have always thought of her as more than just a friend.”
“So what did you do to become family?”
I bit my lip and didn’t know how much I should say. Ashlyn was a very shy person about her past, well some of it and I didn’t think that she wanted me to tell Sam about it. So I just kind of glazed over it and hoped that it was enough.
“Let’s just say that she was going to go down a path that was dangerous and I was able to talk her out of it. It wasn’t more than that. I knew who she was around and I just kind of warned her, helped her get away from them. I didn’t want to see someone else go through the same thing. She was older than me, but when she first came to the city she was a little naïve.”
“And you aren’t?”
I giggled and moved towards the bedroom door, I had to get some distance between us.
“Not really. I may have been in some ways, but in others not so much. I have spent a lot of time in New York. I know all of the games.”
“Then why I am your first?”
I couldn’t believe he was asking me such a thing, but at the same time I could understand the wonder. He wasn’t the first person to look at me as if I were an alien. I didn’t think it was that hard to comprehend, but for many it was. If nothing else, I had at least learned that.
“I don’t know. Maybe because you saved me Sam. No one has ever done something so nice for me. I owed you one.”
“Ouch, that is not what I wanted to hear.”
“Well it is what it is. I don’t want to pretend it is something else. I will always be grateful to you Sam, but I doubt I will ever see you again. New York is a big city.”
“I know you are right, but I don’t like to think about
it.”
I waved him off. I was sure that he was just being nice. “I am going to get Carol up and we will hopefully all be back in the States by tonight. You are a good man Sam and I am glad to have met you.”
I went to shake his hand and he pushed it aside, pulling me in for a hug. He tried to kiss me, but I was already telling myself that I had to back off a little bit. I was in too deep and any kind of contact was just going to make losing him even worse. I didn’t want to think about it and I certainly didn’t want to think about what I was going to feel like when I was back home. I was just going to have to focus on getting a job and moving on. I had to put all of this behind me, including Sam.
***
We made our way to the courthouse and the judge couldn’t do anything else but let us go. He put a warrant out for Rico because of the testimony that Carol gave, but I didn’t want to wait around to see what happens. Carol didn’t either. She wasn’t going to come to New York with me. Carol was going to need some time to heal and was already looking into a rehab that would give her what she needed.
I tried to forget about Sam, I really did. In the day time it wasn’t so bad, but at night I was always visited with thoughts of him and what we had done together. It was a lot to take on and it was even harder to forget. He kissed me one last time as I was getting off the plane. It was sweet and spicy, but I knew that it would be the last time. I wish it wasn’t, I knew that I was in love with the man. I also knew that I couldn’t make him do or be what I wanted him to be, no matter how hard I tried. It just wasn’t meant to be.
