“Well, it worked out well. You were here.”
“Yeah, but this is a small clinic set up for minor situations so the people in town don’t have to travel all the way to the city every time they have the flu or need a shot. If this was more serious I would have had to transport you anyway.”
“I’ll remember that next time. But hopefully there won’t be a next time.”
Hawk started writing notes in her chart. “You live alone now, don’t you?”
“Yes, I have a condo over at the Wingate.”
Hawk thought a minute. “I don’t like the idea of you being alone tonight. Head injuries can be a little tricky. You seem okay and your initial shock from the accident seems to have subsided. But sometimes even the smallest bump on the head can become something more. You might want to consider staying at your parents’ house tonight just so that someone can wake you up periodically to make sure you’re okay.”
“Is that really necessary?”
“It’s up to you. Is there a problem with staying at your parents tonight?”
“Yes…well, no. I can stay in my old room, but my parents aren’t home. My aunt had surgery today so they’re staying at her house in Rapid City.”
Hawk nodded. “Then perhaps they can call you periodically through the night to check on you.”
“Soon as I get home I’ll call them.”
“I want you to follow-up with me in a few days even if you feel better.”
Maddie agreed to come back for a follow-up visit and climbed off the examining table. Ethan was waiting for her in the waiting room when she emerged from the exam room. Nancy, the clinic’s receptionist, was laughing hard at something Ethan had said. But they both stopped and looked up as she approached.
When Ethan saw her, he tapped his hand on the counter lightly and asked, “Did you get a clean bill of health?”
Maddie didn’t say anything and Hawk, who came into the waiting room behind her, didn’t elaborate.
“Are you driving her home?” Hawk asked.
Ethan nodded. “I’m off-duty now.”
“Good. I need to head home so I can help Regis scout some volunteers to do work this weekend at the Wounded Veterans Center. Now that the foundation has been repaired we can start working on the inside.” Hawk’s face brightened as he turned to Maddie. “Hey, what are you doing this weekend?”
“I don’t think I have any plans.”
“A lot of volunteers are coming out to help,” Ethan added. “Mom is catering for the day so everyone will be well fed. It should be a lot of fun. You and your parents should come over. That is if your aunt is on her feet again by then.”
“We’ll see.” Turning to Hawk, she said, “Thanks for everything. Goodnight, Nancy.” She waved at the receptionist as she headed for the door.
“Night, honey! I hope you feel better,” Nancy said.
Maddie walked down the clinics ramp to the small parking lot. The McKinnons had always been a big presence in Rudolph. Early on it was MW Oil that had given work to a lot of people during hard times. And then Kate McKinnon, Ethan’s mother, had opened a diner when Hawk was just a baby and Wade was a toddler. Maddie’s gaze was drawn to the building across the street. The little diner was a focal point of town, sitting at the crossroads of the two main streets in and out of Rudolph. It held memories for most everyone who had grown up with her. The lights were still on and cars were still scattered in the parking lot.
Suddenly her mind wandered to a hot summer day much like today. She was much younger then, and the McKinnon boys were out for mischief and wanted to rile their mother up. They’d loaded the back of a truck with laundry baskets filled with water balloons and called everyone down to the diner for a water balloon fight that had everyone laughing and cooling off in the hot sun. Maddie had never laughed so hard in all her life. She’d worn a pair of cut-off jeans and a bikini top just to make herself look older like Poppy and Kelly.
And so Ethan would notice.
She smiled with the memory, but felt the bittersweet tug in her heart thinking about how it was one of the few times when Denny had not only let her tag along with him and Ethan, but he’d purposely drove to the house to pick her up so she could join in the fun. Kate McKinnon was rip-roaring mad at them for the mess they made of the parking lot that day. But she still laughed along with them while they lined up so she could take a picture, all of them dripping wet and holding spent balloons in their hands.
* * *
She was lost somewhere, Ethan thought as he took in the wistful expression on Maddie’s face. She stared across the street as if she were looking at something from the Ghost of Christmas Past. Something tugging at her and she couldn’t break free.
“Are you hungry?” he asked.
She blinked hard and then shook her head, pulling her attention back to the clinic parking lot. “Where’s the cruiser?”
“I swapped vehicles at the station while you were in with Hawk. The SUV is mine.”
“If you don’t mind, I just want to go home.”
They drove most of the way to the condo in silence. It had been a long day for him and by the vacant expression on Maddie’s face, he knew she was upset.
Now that the adrenaline rush of seeing her bleeding had worn off, Ethan had a chance to really look at her. She’d always been a pretty girl and it always puzzled him why men weren’t falling at her feet. Truth is, he’d been watching her and he knew she wasn’t dating anyone. It helped that his mother knew just about everyone in town, including Maddie’s parents.
Maddie’s brown hair was streaked with golden stands throughout, something she’d never done before. And she smelled nice. Her perfume was light and citrusy. Nothing heavy. She’d always liked lotions and cologne when she was younger. When Ethan had teased Denny for smelling like a department store make-up counter, Denny had always complained, saying it gave him a headache just to walk into Maddie’s room because she had all that “stuff” lined up on her dresser.
“I’ve been back in Rudolph for almost a year and I barely see you,” Ethan said.
Silence.
“You know, you can’t avoid me forever,” Ethan said, taking his eyes off the road for a second to see her reaction.
“Wanna bet?”
Ethan smiled. At least he got that much out of her.
Progress.
“So, you have been avoiding me.”
With his help, Ethan thought. Only Maddie didn’t know that. And maybe his brother, Sam, was right. They couldn’t dance around a ghost forever. Some things had to be faced head on.
“I don’t want it to take another car accident for me to see you again. Besides, Rudolph is a small town and we know all the same people.”
She continued to look out the window.
Ethan put his directional on to pull into the parking lot of the Wingate Condominium complex where Maddie lived.
“Which one is it?” he asked.
“Number eleven.”
He found the parking space marked number eleven and parked the SUV. Before he could undo his seatbelt and get out of the car, Maddie turned to him and placed her hand on his arm.
“Thank you for bringing me home. But you don’t have to see me inside.”
“Why not?”
“It’s not necessary.” She drew in a slow breath and looked out the window toward her condo. “Thing is, the last time I saw you…well, I shouldn’t have let my emotions get the best of me. I shouldn’t have…behaved the way I did.”
“You were upset.” Ethan said. “You had every right to be.”
“But I meant what I said about not wanting to see you again.”
Her admission was like a blow to the gut. “What?”
“It’s too difficult seeing you. Everything about you reminds me of Denny and what happened. I’ve never been able to reconcile what happened out in the Badlands that day. And…I don’t know that I’ll ever forgive you for what you did.”
It was hard to swallow the lump of tru
th she was feeding him, but Ethan listened. It was a long time coming and he’d bet a week’s pay this was harder for Maddie to say than for him to hear.
“I don’t expect you to forget what happened or think I have forgotten Denny.”
Her expression turned cool. “Haven’t you? As soon as the funeral was over you headed to the airport to play the hero. You spent eight years in the military being the hero. Every time I went anywhere in town all I heard was Ethan got an accommodation for this or Ethan just finished BUDS training or… It was like you had a damned publicity department singing your praises. Everyone forgot what really happened out there with Denny. All they saw was ‘Saint Ethan, the Hero’. Look at you, even now you’re playing the hero cop, coming to my rescue. No wonder everyone has forgotten.”
She drew in a deep breath as if she were searching for courage or getting ready for a battle she’d waited ten years to fight. Ethan wasn’t sure which, but he remained silent and would take whatever beating she gave him.
“But I remember, Ethan. I remember seeing my parents grieve for years until all the life in them drained away. They’re only now back to doing things like normal people do. For years I don’t think I even heard them laugh. They didn’t spend eight years forgetting and living life on the edge, playing super hero.”
“Is that what you think I did?”
“I know that’s what you did. You always took everything to the edge. If Denny dreamed up a prank, you took it one step further. But one thing I know for sure is that you didn’t grieve for Denny.” She pointed out the window. “Out there, doing whatever it was you were doing, it was easy to forget that a kid like Dennison Newton died because of your prank. But here...it was with me every day.”
Maddie pushed the car door open with more force than needed and climbed outside to the parking lot. Ethan did the same.
“Don’t follow me, Ethan. I’m not Denny’s little kid sister anymore. I’m not going to follow in your shadow and I don’t want you following me.”
With both of the car door’s ajar, Ethan sat in the driver’s seat and watched Maddie rush to the door of her condo. The only thing he could hear was the sudden rush of blood storming through his veins and his heart hammering in his chest.
He’d done this to her. No one else. People say time heals all wounds. But Maddie’s wounds were as fresh as the day he’d stood in her living room and told Denny’s family that Denny was dead. He’d stayed away because he thought it would be easier for all of them. And now he knew for sure that he’d been wrong. And he had no idea how to even begin to make it right.
# # #
Chapter Three
He pulled into the parking lot of MW Oil, the company his family had founded and where his father still worked. Maddie had accused him of playing the hero. Well, hero wasn’t a word he’d ever used when describing himself. None of the Navy SEALs on the team he’d had the privilege of working with did. But it still surprised him when others used that word associated with him. Especially in his home town of Rudolph where he left for the Navy over ten years ago as anything but a hero.
The normally warm summer weather had settled into a cool day thanks to the cloudy sky that covered the sun. The light rain shower that had caught him off guard earlier had stopped a few minutes ago, but the strong smell of moisture and wet earth still hung heavy in the air. As he pulled into a parking space and stepped out of his SUV, Ethan could still see steam rising from the ground, caused by the rain hitting the hot pavement.
He stepped out of the car and sat on the curb under a shady tree with his legs stretched out drinking the cup of hot coffee he’d picked up at the diner before coming over. He’d been to MW Oil at least a hundred times in his lifetime. He’d never been nervous about walking inside. But then, Maddie Newton wasn’t sitting behind a desk just inside that door.
Ethan had spent most of the night walking the floor until his father finally came downstairs. Unlike when he was a teenager, getting caught for sneaking into the house after a night of fun, Don McKinnon didn’t yell. He was concerned. But he didn’t ask any questions beyond how his day was before getting a glass of water and urging him to go to bed. Even when Ethan finally crawled under the cool sheets in his room, sleep eluded him, and he was paying for it today.
He couldn’t get the words Maddie had said to him the other night out of his mind. She meant what she’d said at Denny’s funeral. She never wanted to see him again. That was her choice and for years Ethan had respected that.
But no more.
During the long hours of the night he realized that Maddie was right. Not about him forgetting Denny. Ethan couldn’t possibly forget their friendship, or how Denny died. But he had escaped his grief in the military. Being in the military and then becoming a Navy SEAL had taken all his focus. He didn’t have time to dwell on what he couldn’t change and he didn’t have a constant reminder of how he’d failed. He focused on not failing for the sake of his SEAL team and the special ops they’d done.
But Maddie was left here to grieve every day. The only difference between her and her parents is that they’d finally found a way to live again. After seeing Maddie yesterday, it was clear to Ethan that she hadn’t. But he was going to change that. Even if it killed him.
* * *
“I was wondering if I could have an extra hour or so off for lunch,” Maddie said, standing in Don McKinnon’s office while he signed papers that needed to be mailed today. “My car is fixed. George is closing the garage early today to go to his nephew’s Bar Mitzvah and I want to pick it up before he leaves. I hope that won’t be a problem, Mr. McKinnon.”
Don McKinnon sighed as he leaned back in his leather chair, shaking his head. “I’ve told you since the day you started working at MW Oil that you don’t have to call me Mr. McKinnon. You’re making me feel ancient.”
Maddie smile sheepishly. “Old habits die hard. My whole life you’ve always been Mr. McKinnon. I guess it’s going to take more than a few months to get used to it. But I will try my best to work on it.”
“Why don’t you take the rest of the afternoon off?”
She raised an eyebrow. “No, I just need to pick up my car.”
“You didn’t even take a day off after you had the accident. It’s a nice day. Maybe you and Ethan can find something fun to do. He’s been brooding for the last few days.”
“Ethan?”
Don glanced up and handed her a stack of papers. She gave him a new set to sign. “I know there’s some bad blood between you because of what happened to your brother,” he said, signing and shuffling the next round of papers she handed him.
Maddie shrunk a little where she stood.
Don stopped writing and looked up. “I’m sorry. I know it’s sometimes hard to talk about a loved one, even when they’ve been gone a long time.”
Tears filled her eyes, but she knew Don was referring to his eldest son, Wade, who was presumed lost at sea during a tsunami that hit the Asian island he’d been working on several years ago.
“It’s okay.”
“Take the afternoon off. You deserve it.”
A few minutes later, Maddie walked down the hallway, slipping her purse high on her shoulder. As practical as her little car was, she was happy to finally be getting it back after the few days without it. George had given her a sweet deal on repairing the radiator and body damage. And he’d turned the work around in a matter of days which meant she could drive again and not rely on being driven.
Denny had taught her how to drive when she was only fifteen, right before she’d begged her mother for legitimate lessons. And Denny had died before Maddie had received her license. She never got the pleasure of thrusting her new paper license in her brother’s face and hearing him rib her about how the roads will never be safe again now that she was driving. Yet every time she backed out of the driveway or out of a parking spot, she remembered how Denny told her to sit her arm at the back of her seat as she backed out, making sure the area was clear before she put he
r foot on the gas.
As she pushed through the front door of the building, Maddie thought of the irony. She hadn’t allowed herself to visit those memories in years, and yet, so many of those good times seem to flood her mind lately. Denny’s warm smile. Denny and Ethan laughing out in the yard. Camping trips with her family. She remembered everything.
As the sunshine hit her face, she froze on the top step of the walkway and stared out into the parking lot.
Ethan was leaning against his SUV holding a Styrofoam cup in his hand, smiling at her in a way that melted her heart. She cringed with embarrassment just thinking about the way she used to hang on his every move when she was a kid.
When she reached the parking lot, she said, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you were stalking me.”
“So call the police,” Ethan said smiling wider.
“Very funny. What part of ‘I don’t want to see you’ didn’t you get?”
“This is official police business.”
She glanced at Ethan, trying not to hold his gaze. She narrowed her eyes, just enough to attempt to discern the situation happening in front of her.
“You need to look these over and sign them,” Ethan said, breaking her out of her trance. There were papers in his hands. When she peered closer, she saw the official police station seal on the top.
“What’s this?”
“The report I wrote up about the accident. I want to make sure I didn’t miss any details that will be problematic with your insurance company. The way people are getting denied for claims around here, you can never be too careful.”
“When do you need this back?”
“I need to file it today.”
“I need to pick up my car at George’s before he closes.”
“I’ll drive you.”
She shook her head. “Look, I appreciate all your help the other night, but that won’t be necessary. My mother is coming to pick me up.”
“No, she’s not.”
Wild Dakota Heart (Book 4 - Dakota Hearts) Page 2
