Of their own accord, my hands tangled in Avery’s hair; the silky strand wrapped around my fingers, gentle, teasing. I loved the way his hair felt, and I whimpered again when he slipped a hand beneath my shirt to touch my back gently. I arched myself against him. No, I didn’t have a bit of experience, but it seemed that my body had taken over; instincts took control, leaving me to savor the luscious sensation of Avery’s tongue snaking around mine. He tasted like something warm, something delicious. I couldn’t name the taste; it was special, unique, and fantastically addictive—I wanted more and more, and I feared I wouldn’t ever be able to get enough as the kiss ended and Avery pulled back, looking down at me, with beautifully damp, kiss-swollen lips that were oh-so-perfect.
His hands moved to cup my face tenderly. “Christ! I’ve wanted to kiss you like that from the moment I saw you last semester, sitting in Professor Johnson’s class looking so sexy.” After a kiss like that, I could no longer doubt his admission, but it still amazed me and I guess the depth of my amazement was reflected in my eyes, because Avery grinned. “I can see we are going to spend some time building up your self-confidence, Decker, because you really need to know how incredible you are.”
“No one has ever said anything like that to me before.” My hand rested on his chest, and I could feel his heart racing.
“Anyone who can’t see what I see when I look at you is blind or stupid.”
“Avery—”
“Of course, I consider myself damn lucky someone hasn’t snatched you up.” He leaned in to brush a light kiss over my lips, and I shivered from the brief contact. “And honestly, baby, this isn’t how I wanted to go about this and I’m sorry.”
“Sorry for what?”
“I intended to get you alone tonight, I can’t deny that, but I wanted to tell you how much I like you and ask you out.”
“Seriously?”
“I want to do this right, Decker.” His thumb brushed my bottom lip. “I want to take you out to dinner. Maybe see a movie. Or maybe go dancing. I’ve never done actual dating before, I have to admit, but with you… damn, with you, baby, I want to get everything right. No rushing, no pushing for too much too soon.” He sounded so earnest and his eyes…. As cliché as it sounded, his eyes reflected the honesty behind those words and I smiled, pulling him to me, into another kiss that soon had us clinging to one another. I surprised myself. I couldn’t believe I was being so bold, actually initiating a kiss, but the way Avery responded assured me I was doing it right. I groaned when his hands trailed down my back to greedily cup my ass and my dick swelled, to the point it was near painful. I pressed hard against Avery. I needed contact, as much contact as I could get; damn, but I wanted anything, everything. It would have been embarrassing, if I hadn’t been well past the point of caring, as Avery suddenly lifted me and I instinctively wrapped my legs around his waist.
With remarkable ease, Avery walked us across the room to his bed, where he sat down with me straddling his lap.
My hands rested on his shoulders as we sat there for an endless time, kissing again and again, with each kiss becoming more intense, hungrier, than the last. I forgot about anything and everything beyond Avery; the party downstairs was meaningless, my insecurities were seemingly miles away from me, and I didn’t question it. I didn’t feel the need. I was in Avery’s arms and he wanted me and that was really all that mattered. “Avery….” I gasped his name when he broke the kiss and immediately turned his attention to the sensitive patch of skin just below my right ear. I thought I might pass out. He licked and sucked and nibbled, and I was putty in his hands. Avery seemed to intuitively know where to touch, where to taste; places that I wouldn’t ever have imagined sensual were lusciously susceptible to Avery’s exploring mouth, and I arched against him again, feeling emboldened by the press of his erection hard against mine. Incredible. So amazing, so insane. I was a mess of raw emotions and need, and I knew it was the same for Avery as he reached for the hem of my shirt. I quickly lifted my arms, allowing him to easily free me from the still-damp garment.
Avery threw the shirt aside before quietly removing his own and I swear, my mouth watered at the sight of Avery’s hairless chest, dark brown nipples, sculpted pecs and abs… he was a freakin’ work of art, and the knowledge that he was mine made me lightheaded. “Christ, Avery, you’re perfect.” The words escaped before I could think to stop them, and I was pleased to see Avery blush at my truthful outburst; I liked knowing I had the same power over him that he had over me. That only fueled my already raging desire, and I reached out, almost tentatively, to place my hands on his chest. At the contact, Avery sucked in a breath. I looked up to see that his eyes were wide, dark with desire, and I wanted more. Needed more. I wanted to touch, taste; it was a need unlike anything I had ever before experienced, but Avery seemed willing to give me the freedom to explore, and my hesitation melted away—if my touch could bring Avery pleasure, I wanted that. I could hear both of us breathing heavily, intently, as I moved my hand over him slowly. Reverently. I was completely in awe. His skin was so warm and taut over his hard muscles, but his skin was also surprisingly soft. I adored how it felt, how he felt, trembling, ever so slightly, beneath my touch.
I brushed fingers over his already budded nipples. He jerked in reaction, and again, I smiled at him. “I like touching you.” I whispered the admission, and Avery caught one hand in his, easily lifting it to his lips and kissing my knuckles gently. It was such a tender gesture. But that was Avery; he was wonderfully tender, respectful. I knew without asking that he was waiting for me to determine the pace, and that meant a lot to me; it told me he respected me and how far I was ready to take things between us and honestly, I knew what I wanted. Needed. I wanted Avery in every possible way, and I wanted him to know that, but despite the information he had gleaned from my good buddy Scarlett, there was still a great deal he didn’t know, and I wanted to be upfront with him.
He seemed to notice something in my eyes, and again he cupped my cheek, his thumb brushing over my cheekbone. “What’s wrong? Decker, if we’re moving too fast, we can slow all this down until you’re more comfortable.”
“It’s not that.” I whispered, my fingers playing idly with the hair at the back of his neck, mostly because I loved how soft and silky it felt. “You think you know me, but I… well, there’s a lot you don’t know, and I guess I don’t want you to move forward with whatever this is until you understand certain things about me.”
“Decker—”
“I don’t have contact with my family,” I blurted out baldly.
“Okay.” Avery watched me closely and I drew in a breath, feeling a little sick, because this wasn’t a subject I enjoyed.
“The short version is this: my dad is a drunk and he can be a real ass and I… well, when I came out, he disowned me right then and there.”
“Baby….”
“And my mother, she cried and she was so upset, but she’s never been able to stand up to my father.” I tried a casual shrug to appear more at peace with the situation than I actually was, but I suspected Avery saw through my bravado. “Scarlett’s the closest thing I have to family. It was her family I stayed with when she and I went home over summer break, and I just wanted you to know that I’m a little screwed-up and if it bothers you, I understand.” I just needed to get it all out there. It was time for full disclosure before I ended up completely losing my heart, and I didn’t doubt that I could tumble head-over-heels in love with Avery before the night was over, because I was already halfway there. Maybe more than halfway there, truth be told. He had this intense hold on me and my heart and honestly, I didn’t know what I would end up doing if he decided I wasn’t worth his time thanks to my less-than-ideal family history. I silently prayed I wouldn’t find out, as Avery shifted our position so I was stretched out on his bed and he lay down beside me.
He braced his weight on his elbow and looked down at me, one hand resting on my chest. I reached up to cover that hand with my own, and Avery
laced our fingers together, which made me smile.
“Remember when I said I wanted you since I saw you last semester?”
“I remember.”
“And I also said I had some stuff going on I had to deal with, because I didn’t want to have anything distracting me from you?” I nodded at that. “Well, the thing is, my mom and dad split years ago. My dad lives in California, and I have to say, he and I aren’t close. I never did forgive him for ditching me and my mom for some bimbo and… well, my mother has never been a strong person emotionally.” There was a catch in his voice at that admission, and I squeezed his hand gently and Avery squeezed back just as gently. “She’s spent years in and out of different institutions and things go okay as long as she keeps on the medication, but last semester, after a conversation with my father, she stopped taking the meds and she had some bad times. My aunt does what she can to help, but I’m an only child and usually, I’m the only one my mom listens to, so I had to talk her into going back to the hospital until the drugs were working again and it’s pretty messy.”
“Avery, I’m so sorry.” And I was, I could see how much it hurt him and I hated that.
“It’s just the way things are and they can’t be changed, but I want you to know, I have some family history that’s complicated too.”
“It’s doesn’t bother me.”
“And the fact that your father is an asshole doesn’t change how I feel about you.” His eyes locked on mine and held, and I nodded, not trusting myself to speak. “Listen, I know it sounds cliché and hokey, but I’ve never felt drawn to anyone the way I feel drawn to you, Decker, and that means something special. You’re special. I need you to know that. Believe it, baby. I won’t lie and say I haven’t had sex a few times, but that was just sex and I don’t want something cold and meaningless with you.”
“I believe you. I do. And I… I’m not experienced. At all.” My face burned. “I don’t want to be a disappointment.”
“You could never disappoint me,” Avery whispered. “But if this is moving too fast, we can slow down. Okay? I won’t be upset with you.”
“It means a lot to me, that you’re willing to wait, but I want this.”
“Decker….”
“I know it’s sudden and maybe it’s crazy, but I just know that this is right and I want to be with you.”
“I won’t hurt you. Ever. I’ll take my time and I swear, I’ll make this good for you.” He leaned down to capture my mouth in a heated kiss, and I instantly responded, placing a hand on the back of his neck to pull him closer. “Gonna show you what you mean to me.” I shivered at the promise as Avery again turned his attention to my neck; he nipped and licked and bit into the skin at my collarbone, which sent electric-like jolts directly to my dick, and I cried out, because it felt incredible. His body pressed down against mine, effectively holding me captive. I was happily engulfed by blazing skin and hard muscles, and I repeatedly arched against Avery, rubbing our cocks together as best I could with layers of denim between us. I whimpered helplessly. I hadn’t known it was possible to want so much, to feel completely driven by need. It was wonderful and it was heady and I never wanted it to end; I wanted everything Avery could give me, and I dug my fingers deep into his back, using my aching body to beg for more. And more. I couldn’t fathom a rational thought, I couldn’t conjure words, all I could do was make gluttonous little noises as Avery began kissing and biting a sensual path down the length of my chest. He wrapped his lips around first one nipple and then the other, sucking hard at the aching nubs before tugging with his teeth and when he did, I bucked up off the bed. Avery laughed gently against my skin, and I loved the vibrations that created. I shivered once more. I was trembling inside; I was in utter bliss. Avery’s mouth played my body like an instrument only he knew how to manipulate, and I wrapped my legs around him tightly, anchoring myself to that delectable body and the strength it possessed.
“Taste so good, baby.” Avery breathed against my skin. “So good. Could spend all night just tasting you.” He nipped teasingly at my belly button as his hands moved between us, and I shuddered as he unfastened and then carefully unzipped my jeans. I felt as if I were teetering on some precarious edge. Everything was hypersensitive, but I realized that I loved how wanton and eager I felt; for the first time in my life, I wasn’t hiding behind self-constructed walls, because I knew, with Avery, I was safe and always would be. Always. Avery would see to it. I was where I was meant to be, and I was meant to be with Avery; there wasn’t a single doubt resounding in my mind, and I suspected my feelings were evident in my eyes as I forced them open to watch as Avery stood long enough to tug my jeans and boxers down my hips and legs.
He had to pull off my shoes before he could completely remove my pants, and I happily watched each move Avery made; he was so damn sexy, the way his muscles moved gracefully kept me totally transfixed. “You’re beautiful.” I didn’t feel any shame saying the words because they were honest and Avery smiled, emotions shimmering brightly in his beautiful blue eyes; in those eyes, I could clearly see everything Avery felt in that moment, and it thrilled me to know his emotions matched mine. This was indeed real. Avery wanted me. It no longer felt like a hazy dream; it felt like reality, because that was what it was—Avery Beckett had found something in me no one else had ever seen (me included), and that knowledge thrilled me. It made me believe I was more than some nerdy loser; it made me believe I was special and wanted, and I basked in the confidence that generated as Avery stood for a moment, looking down at me, stretched out on his bed and more aroused than I had ever been. It was erotic. Exciting. I knew that compared to my soon-to-be-lover, I wasn’t some masculine work of art, but the way Avery looked at me, the way his eyes devoured me with undeniable hunger, assured me Avery liked what he saw. He didn’t believe me too thin, too pale, too inadequate… whatever I was, in Avery’s eyes, it was more than enough. I smiled at him as he took a quick moment to strip himself, leaving me to eagerly drink in what was the most beautiful sight I had ever witnessed. Christ! He was perfect. I was dumbfounded, mesmerized; he was all enchantingly sculpted muscle—I could look at him, forever and it wouldn’t be nearly long enough, a thought that bounced around my mind as my ravenous eyes finally settled on his erection. Damn, but I gasped, seeing his impressive (and gods help me, enormous) shaft nestled in a patch of curls only slightly darker than his hands-mussed hair.
Dazed, I pushed myself up on my elbows. “Avery….” I wasn’t certain what I wanted to say, but Avery smiled and crawled back onto the bed to lie down beside me, one arm draping over my waist.
“We’ll take our time,” he promised, and I nodded. “If anything doesn’t feel right, or if you need time, just tell me and we’ll slow down, baby.” His lips claimed mine again, and I opened to him as we turned, facing one another, side by side. We seemingly fit together perfectly. I was molded tightly against him, and his hands were somehow everywhere. And I was again lost. I had no ability to form rational thoughts… I could only whimper and gasp in reaction to Avery’s lips on my neck and shoulders, and then he pushed me onto my back, and I went willingly, tangling my trembling hands in his hair.
Avery’s lips again teased my nipples, and I arched my back, using the hands in Avery’s hair to try and keep him firmly anchored to me. “Please… please, Avery….” I wasn’t even sure what I was begging for, I just knew I wanted more; it felt like I was burning from the inside out. I was consumed by my need for this man and what only he could give me. His lips moved lower and lower, while one hand moved away from me long enough to fumble with the drawer attached to his small nightstand.
Tugging too hard, Avery nearly tipped the nightstand over and most of its contents spilled freely to the floor.
Cursing, he leaned over the side of the bed, retrieving a tube of lube and a box of condoms, and I laughed.
“I can’t imagine how completely inept my seduction attempt must seem.” Avery rolled his eyes at himself.
“It’s kinda n
ice to know you might be as nervous and excited as I am,” I confessed as he pulled himself back onto the bed, lube and condoms in hand.
He dropped the items beside him and leaned close to kiss me hard and quick. “Believe me, baby, I’m nervous, and I’m so damn excited I feel like some clueless teenager.” He lifted his hand to caress my cheek tenderly. “This is new for me, Decker. I like you. This is so much more than sex or some casual hookup, and I’m terrified I’m going to send you running from me.” He sounded surprisingly vulnerable, which seemed so out of character for my image of him, but the honesty just made me fall for him even more.
I covered his hand with mine. “I’m not running from you. Not a chance. I never believed I could be here, with you, and now… you have no idea how very much I want you, Avery.” The admission came easily, much to my delight, and Avery grinned before sweeping in for another heated kiss, and I wrapped my arms tightly around his shoulders. He pushed me down on the mattress, and I savored how wonderful it felt, his body pressing into mine; he was heavy, but it was a weight that I gladly accepted as Avery gently nudged my legs apart, and I didn’t hesitate to allow him the freedom to do so.
The hand that wrapped around me was gentle, teasing, but it was a touch that was beyond exquisite. “Avery….” My body bucked upward, and Avery chuckled before kissing along my neck as his hand began stroking me slowly, languidly. It was obvious he was enjoying the teasing pace, and I wrapped a leg snuggly around his hips, rubbing wantonly against him. I didn’t care if I appeared out of control, because hell, I was indeed out of control; my skin was blazing, my heart pounding wildly. I wanted to cry out Avery’s name, but I was too breathless as he worked his mouth down my chest. He placed heated, open-mouthed kisses. He licked, nibbled, his tongue teased sensitive places with sensual intent and then, that hot little tongue impishly licked the underside of my cock and stars exploded behind my eyes. Holy shit! I may have said that out loud, as I heard Avery laugh in the instant before the most glorious heat engulfed my shaft. Avery seemed to swallow me effortlessly, until the head of my cock brushed the back of his throat and with focused energy he used his mouth, tongue, and lips to pull me closer and closer to some magical abyss.
The Jock and the Wallflower Page 2
