by Brenda Novak
His teeth flashed as he gave her one of his sexy grins. Then he used his shoulders to keep her knees apart and slid his hands up under her, pulling her toward his mouth. “Wait until you feel this.”
When his tongue touched her, Evelyn gasped and closed her eyes. She was determined not to focus on the fact that she felt small and easily overpowered in comparison to his big, muscular body. He’d stop the second she asked him to. That was what she had to remember.
But why would she ever ask him to stop? The way he used his lips and teeth caused her to gasp and squirm in a good way. She could feel the tension building, could feel the kind of climax that so often eluded her—when she let all of that other stuff get inside her head—drawing close, like a swell rising out to sea that was quickly turning into a giant wave thundering toward the shore.
“Yes!” she whispered. “That’s good!”
Amarok tightened his grip on her, holding her in place so that her movements couldn’t interrupt his ministrations. He was determined to make her come; she could tell he wanted that as much as she did. “It’s just me, Evelyn,” he said, surprising her by rocking back on his haunches for a moment. “I’ve never hurt you, and I never would. So let go, okay? Let go and trust me.”
She did trust him. And she proved it. Not long after his mouth returned to her and his tongue continued its erotic work, her body jerked with the first wave of a powerful climax.
When it was over, he smiled proudly as he leaned over her. “You did it. And you screamed so loud I thought the neighbors might start banging on the walls.”
He was joking about the screams, but she had been more vocal than usual. “You haven’t seen anything yet,” she told him, and reached down to undo his pants. “I believe you have something else for me, and it’s in here.”
Finally, he kicked off his boots so that he could remove his pants and boxers, and she felt a strange sort of female pride when she wrapped her hand around his erection. “This is pretty impressive,” she teased.
“Maybe you can help me figure out how to make the most of it,” he said, and spread her knees again. He was so much more aggressive than usual. Evelyn got the impression he was too caught up in what he was feeling to remember to take the usual precautions—to move slowly, to follow the “rules” they’d established over the past year so that she could be comfortable making love. Usually he let her be on top, so she’d never feel threatened. But she could tell that he was enjoying taking charge, and she wanted to let him express his sexuality without feeling as though he had to rein it in. She wasn’t the only one who mattered. There had to be freedom, for both of them.
“I’m sure I can,” she said.
He started to settle himself between her thighs. “What about a condom?” she asked. “Don’t you have one?”
“I do. It’s in my wallet.”
She reached for his cast-off jeans, but he caught her hand. “I don’t want to wear it,” he said as he stared down at her. “You’re the woman I plan to marry, Evelyn. Let me come inside you.”
That frightened her. She wasn’t sure she was ready for a baby. But the doctors weren’t sure she’d be able to have one, anyway. They’d done all they could to repair the physical damage caused by Jasper, but her periods hadn’t been regular since then. If she refused, maybe they’d be arguing about a moot point. Besides, Amarok’s lips had returned to her neck and then her ears, making it almost impossible to remember why it would be such a terrible thing to cast aside their only form of birth control.
“Can I?” he breathed, his voice raspy as he held himself ready to push inside her. “Will you let me make love to you the way I want to?”
She caught his face in her hands. “Are you testing my level of commitment, Amarok?”
“Maybe,” he admitted.
He waited. When she didn’t speak, he reached for his jeans. “If you’re not ready, it’s fine.”
She stopped him. “I’m ready,” she said, and pulled him inside her.
As Amarok began to move, Evelyn let her mind and body go. The more she concentrated on the rhythm, the easier it was to get caught up in it, to simply enjoy herself. Even her subconscious was starting to trust Amarok, to recognize the difference between him and Jasper, she realized. She wasn’t tempted to freeze up or panic. This was another victory.
“Are you close?” Amarok asked.
The pleasure was intense, too intense for speech, so she nodded.
“Then look at me. Let me watch you.”
Her eyes met and locked with his as her second climax hit—this one was even better than the last. She cried out as her muscles contracted, gripping him that much tighter.
A satisfied expression claimed his face, which disappeared as, with a final thrust, his eyes closed and he let himself go.
Afterwards, Amarok seemed as reluctant to pull away from her as she was from him. They remained tangled up together, listening to each other breathe, for several long minutes as they recovered.
“That was perfect,” he said at length, breaking the incredible calm.
“Well, you really know what you’re doing,” she responded with a throaty laugh.
He leaned up on one elbow. “No, this one was all you, babe. You’re always doubting yourself, wondering if you’re not measuring up somehow, not able to meet my sexual fantasies or desires.”
She ran her thumb over the rough beard growth on his jaw. “And…”
“Just for the record, that was the best sex I ever had.”
“Because I didn’t make you wear a condom?” she teased.
He sobered and pressed his lips softly to hers. “Because I love you.”
“What if we just created a baby, Amarok?”
“I’m okay with that. I’ll be even happier.”
She rubbed her flat stomach, trying to imagine what it would feel like with a baby inside it. “I hope you know what you’re doing, Sergeant.”
He put his hand over hers. “I know what I want.”
“And that is…”
“You and as many babies as you’ll give me.”
“Now you’re talking about having a big family? What am I getting into?”
He nipped playfully at her neck. “We can start with one.”
The thought of carrying Amarok’s child, of being a mother, sort of excited her—until she realized that they hadn’t solved their problems. They were just ignoring them.
17
Evelyn had been dozing off in the motel with Amarok. They’d enjoyed a relaxing and fulfilling two hours. An interlude that left her languid. But Amarok was beginning to stir. He wasn’t one who could lie around for long periods; he had too much energy. That was usually the case for her, too. She almost always had something to do or somewhere to be, which was probably why the past two hours were so remarkable. These moments in time, when the demons of her past finally disappeared from her consciousness, were rare, memorable.
“Do you really think the police will keep a close eye on that convenience store by the tattoo parlor?” she asked as he, noticing that she was coming around, got up to dress.
“You mean where Vanessa Lopez thinks she might’ve seen someone who looks like that age-enhanced photo of Jasper?”
She hadn’t prefaced her remarks. They were simply an outcropping of what she’d been thinking since she started returning to full wakefulness. “Yeah. The 7-Eleven you told me about on the phone.”
“They’ll visit there periodically, have the clerks keep an eye out and report back if they see someone matching his description.”
She got up to recover her clothes, which were on the floor where Amarok had thrown them. “Which the clerks may or may not remember to do.”
Having donned his boxers, he pulled on his jeans. “I stopped by there myself. The guy I talked to knows Vanessa. He’s eager to help catch her attacker. I’m guessing the others will feel the same, so they’ll do what they can.”
She had to extract her panties from her jeans, since he’d peele
d them both off at once. “I guess I’m just so used to dead ends that I’m growing pessimistic.”
He retrieved her bra for her. “It’s been twenty-one years,” he said, handing it to her. “Your hope is bound to flag now and then. You’re only protecting yourself against more disappointment, anyway.”
“But you think the long wait might soon be over?” She tried to hide the desperation in her voice. She’d wanted to see Jasper caught for so long she couldn’t even imagine what that day would be like. “That we’re getting closer than we’ve ever been?”
“If we can get through to Jasper’s mom, gain her support, we’ve got a great chance. And I got the feeling that’s a distinct possibility. She’s torn.”
“Does she know about the attempted abduction in Casa Grande?”
“She might’ve seen it on the news, but I didn’t mention it to her. I didn’t find out about it until after I’d left her place, and I haven’t called her back. Not yet. I want to give her plenty of time to think about the Peoria killings, to wonder if her son could be involved, before I speak to her again. Vanessa Lopez gives me something to go back to her with.”
Evelyn smiled as she ogled his bare chest.
“What?” he said. “You keep looking at me like that and we’ll never leave this motel.”
“I’m not sure I want to.”
He walked over and lifted her chin with one finger. “We can stay longer.”
He made her feel safe, whole. “No. Let’s go see your father.” She finished dressing by yanking on her sweater. “When will you call Maureen?”
“Monday.” He sat on the bed to lace up his boots. “I’d rather not take the risk that Stan will be home, which is more likely on the weekend.”
“Makes sense,” she said as she watched him. “Dare we reveal that Vanessa believes she’s seen someone resembling Jasper’s age-enhanced photo at the 7-Eleven near where she works?”
“Definitely not.”
“That might help convince her that he’s still active, still killing.”
He switched to the other foot. “But she could mention it to Jasper, and then he’ll never go there again. We can’t count on her help; we can only hope for it.”
Evelyn bent to pull on her sheepskin-lined boots. “If he’s living in that area, or she knows he works in that area, it might be enough to build her doubt.”
“It’ll be especially damaging if he lives in Peoria and works in Casa Grande or has some other connection to both cities,” he mused.
She combed her fingers through the tangles in her hair. “I don’t have a comb in my purse. Do I look okay?”
He chuckled as he walked over to smooth a lock of hair out of her face. “You look fine.”
“If that’s true, why are you laughing?”
“Because you also look thoroughly…”
“Ravished?”
“That would be the less vulgar way to put it. Looking at you, it’s obvious what we’ve been doing.”
“Then we can’t go see your father!”
“I’m sure my father knows we’re sleeping together. You live with me, remember?” He winked at her. “But just to be nice, I’ll get a brush out of my luggage.”
“You’re so generous.”
“Don’t say I never did anything for you.”
She picked up the phone.
“Who’re you calling?”
“I’m checking my voice mail. Do you need to do it, too?”
“No, I’ll check from my dad’s.”
“This is so archaic,” she grumbled.
“What? No cell coverage? They have cell service here in Anchorage.”
“Little good it does me since I no longer have a phone.” And why would she buy one? She rarely came to Anchorage.
“I think your iPhone has been harder for you to give up than association with your family,” he said wryly.
“You sound surprised, but I can’t argue with that. Other than Brianne, who’s awesome, my family makes my life more difficult. A smart phone would make it a lot easier, if only there was service in Hilltop.”
“Might be a hassle to be tied to landlines at home, but at least we aren’t walking around staring at electronic devices instead of each other.”
“True,” she allowed. “Anyway, you don’t have to worry. After the past two hours, I don’t feel like complaining about anything.”
He came up behind her and hauled her against him. “Good. We’ll have to take the time to make love like this more often.”
She didn’t have the chance to respond. Her voice mail had picked up. She had to listen if she didn’t want to miss her messages.
Evelyn, this is Charlotte. I appreciate you offering me your number. That was—that was nice. Still, I hate to bother you. You must be busy. And I’m probably just being paranoid. But it feels as if someone’s been watching my house, watching me. Whenever I go anywhere, I keep glancing into the rearview mirror. To be honest, I haven’t spotted anyone or anything I could call the police about. It’s that this terrible feeling won’t go away. I was hoping you might … I don’t know, give me someone to talk to about my fear. Anyway, it’s the weekend, so maybe you’re not available. Just call me when you get in, if you don’t mind. I was able to download that file you sent—the age-enhanced photo of Jasper? If he really looks like that, he’s still handsome as the devil. And that makes him even more dangerous, doesn’t it? What woman wouldn’t go home with him?
She left her number, which Evelyn jotted on the hotel pad near the phone before moving on to her next message.
Evelyn, I don’t understand why you won’t call me back.
Fitzpatrick. Making a sound of irritation, she reached for the delete button, but the message was short enough to play out before she could push it. Jasper’s back in Boston. We could catch him, if only you’d work with me.
“What’s wrong?” Amarok asked, concerned by her reaction.
“Fitzpatrick keeps calling me on the Boston murder. Wants to be involved.”
“In what way?”
“He mentioned coming to Alaska to evaluate Bishop. I’m assuming he’d also like to develop a psychological profile of the killer so we can prove that it matches Jasper’s profile, and try to guess who his next victim will be.”
“Can’t he call Boston PD and offer his services?”
“I doubt they’d talk to him without me paving the way. They know me, not him.”
Amarok asked another question, but the next message stole her attention. Although the voice was somewhat familiar, it was also childlike, which baffled her. Who is this? Telling Amarok to hang on for a second, she hit the replay button.
Hello?… Is my brother there?
There was a long pause, as if the caller expected an answer, didn’t understand how voice mail worked.
I have this number. Who is it?… Lyman? Who’s going to take care of me?
She hung up before giving her name, but Evelyn knew it was Beth Bishop. She must’ve figured out how to call the numbers in her phone history. Was she going through them, searching for her brother? Maybe Louise Belgrath, the social worker Evelyn had been in contact with, had helped Beth call in hopes that she could talk to Lyman.…
The rest of Evelyn’s messages were from the other psych team members. Preston Schmidt told her he couldn’t make the staff meeting Monday morning. Jim asked if she’d be willing to come in today or tomorrow to finally get to those brain-imaging comparisons.
Normally, she would’ve been there working overtime whether he joined her or not. But now … she wasn’t willing to give up her weekend with Amarok.
“What’s Fitzpatrick’s number?” Amarok asked when she put down the phone.
“Don’t call him,” she said. “Ignoring him should work—eventually.”
“Doesn’t sound like it’s worked so far. I’m all for making his boundaries a bit clearer.”
“Don’t say anything inflammatory, Amarok. I don’t want him coming after you.”
“Coming after me?”
“I know. Not everyone’s a killer.”
“Just most of the people you work with.”
They were already back to the subject of her work, which he didn’t like. But perhaps he had a point: her view could get skewed. Why not let Amarok speak to Fitzpatrick? Maybe he could get Fitzpatrick to leave her alone.
After giving Amarok the number, she sat on the bed while he dialed.
“Dr. Fitzpatrick?” she heard him say. “This is Sergeant Murphy from Hilltop.… Calm down; she’s fine.… No, nothing’s happened to her.… Yes, we’re aware of the possibility.… I’m working on it.… We’ll catch him.… I appreciate the fact that you’d like to help, but Evelyn doesn’t want anything to do with you.… It’s not about holding a grudge; it’s about moving on. I’m sure you can understand that.… This isn’t one of those instances.… I’ll take care of her. Just proceed with your life and let her proceed with hers, okay?”
When he hung up, Evelyn let her breath seep out in a long sigh. “What’d he say?”
“That this is no time to let your feelings over last year get in the way. That he has a great deal more experience than you do. That you should take advantage of his knowledge and expertise—and other such bullshit.”
“He agreed to let it go, though?”
“I didn’t give him a choice. You ready?”
She stood up, but the memory of Beth’s bewildered voice made her stop. “I have to make one call.”
“To who?”
“Someone who’s a bit lost.”
Amarok leaned against the wall to wait as the phone began to ring. Evelyn was willing to bet Beth was right there, listening to it, but was too scared to pick up. She was scared of everything now that she didn’t have her brother in her life. Louise Belgrath, from the Minnesota Department of Human Services, had had great difficulty getting Beth to open the door.
“No one home?” Amarok asked.
Evelyn had opened her mouth to reply to him when she heard a soft, “Hello?”
Yes! Bishop’s sister had found the courage! “Beth? This is Dr. Talbot. Do you remember me?”
