Hungry eyes. That devoured her, barely blinking, searching every square inch of her face…while she stood still, feeling powerless to move….
Powerless when he leaned closer, when his lips gently touched hers and—for a moment, a mere nanosecond—the past nine years melted away, and she was eighteen again.
She stumbled backward. “No,” she whispered, throwing the keys at him. They hit the ground.
Pain-filled eyes. She was tired of pain. So tired of it. “What do you expect to find here, Jason? At Sea View House? The past is gone. I’m not Penelope, content to wait twenty years for her hero to come home.” Her breath came in gasps, her anger spiraling on itself as she lashed out at him. “You said it yourself in your damn song. It’s ‘Too late and much too dark.’”
He stood immobile as a statue. “You’re right, Lila.” His words were barely audible. “I guess I was hoping—just a tiny hope—to find my best friend.”
Had she heard correctly? “Your best friend? Me? Don’t be so foolish. Haven’t you learned that friendship is for children? What we had is over, Jason. And that was your call. So go back where you came from. Please.” Did she sound as desperate as she felt?
His brow furrowed. “I will—in a month, Lila. One short month. Would you deprive my family of a visit after all this time?”
Of course she couldn’t do that to the Parkers. “Just stay away from me,” she said. “Don’t come to the office, my house or the Lobster Pot.”
His eyes twinkled. “Not even for the best clam chowder in New England?”
She knew he was trying to lighten the tension, but with Katie in the back of her mind, she ignored his efforts. “Stay away, Jason. I don’t want to see you.”
He put both hands on his hips, his smile gone, his eyes narrowing. “Do you think I’m going to beat up your boyfriend or something? Is that why you’re in such a sweat?”
That remark got her attention. “You mean, my fiancé?”
He nodded. “I saw you with him the other night at the steak house. Your diamond shines a block away.”
The steak house. Too bad there was only one good one around. Too bad her clients had cut the evening short. Lila looked down at her hand, at the ring sparkling in the sun. Okay. She could handle this. “I have no concerns about a fight. That’s teenage stuff, and we’re way beyond that.”
“Right. So what’s the problem?”
A question she couldn’t address with Jason, so she didn’t.
CHAPTER FOUR
WHAT’S THE PROBLEM? One simple question that wasn’t very simple at all. It was complex enough to linger in Lila’s mind all day, even now as she drove Katie and Sara to their baseball practice.
How was she going to keep Jason from learning about Katie? Pilgrim Cove was too small, and her family was too big.
Why couldn’t he have surprised them with a quick weekend visit—a time frame she could manage? But a whole month? Never. She was realistic enough to know that much.
So she’d tell him—in a straightforward, impersonal manner. He might even think he had a right to know. Lila wasn’t so sure. After all, he’d chosen to stay away from everyone who loved him. Her mouth tightened. She, also, had memories to deal with from that night and from their whole senior year. But she didn’t like digging deeply. Too painful. Guilt about Jason’s brother haunted her, too. She and Jared had been opposing forces, each pulling Jason in different directions. She hated looking back. But she’d finally moved on with her life…and now this.
She glanced in the rearview mirror at the giggling little girls. Delightful children and such good friends. They were the only two girls on their team; Sara as eager as Katie to whack that ball into the out-field. And Katie, of course, had to keep up with her cousin Casey, who loved baseball. Or was it Casey who had to keep up with Katie? Lila’s smile came naturally now as she thought of the Parkers. Matt had been a loyal friend to her over the years, and had been one of the primary male figures in Katie’s life.
Fortunately, Katie was ready to embrace Adam also. Combining families was a good idea. She admired Adam. He was a good man, a devoted dad and the only man she’d been attracted to since…. she jerked the car to a stop in the parking area next to the ball field.
“You both okay back there?” she asked, turning around.
Her concern was misplaced. The girls were chatting away while unbuckling their seat belts. Then, with gloves in hand, they said their goodbyes and raced from the car toward home plate where their coach was waiting.
A few parents were sitting on the bleachers, and Lila was surprised. No scheduled game today. This afternoon was only a practice, but it seemed everyone was ready for baseball season. After a hard day’s work on a beautiful spring afternoon, why not?
She got out of the car and headed toward the bleachers herself until she saw her daughter turn around, lift her arm and run toward the two males she’d pointed at. “Casey’s here already, Mom. And Uncle Matt.”
Lila grinned and strolled closer, waiting for Katie’s ritual launching at her uncle. Matt would swing her around, pretending to be surprised, always groaning that she was getting w-a-y too big. Her daughter loved the attention, and Matt didn’t seem to mind, either.
“Hey, Uncle Matt! Here I come.” Katie’s voice.
Casey’s voice came next. “Catch her, Uncle Jason!”
The man turned around, caught the flying Katie in his arms as smoothly as his brother did. Lila could clearly see his surprise and his grin. She rushed over as Katie began to speak.
“Hey! You’re not my uncle Matt!”
“I guess I’m not.”
“But you look like him, except he’s fatter.”
Jason lowered Katie to the ground and began to laugh. He laughed with delight, making a delicious sound that invited other voices. Soon, Katie joined in with equal glee; Casey’s giggles were next.
Jason saw her, and his eyes lit up. “Lila! What a terrific kid.” He smiled, a warm, genuine smile. “Your folks really know how to turn out beauties. And she looks just like you, except for the darker hair.”
What had he said? His words started to sink in. He thought Katie was her little sister. Oh, my Lord! Were men usually this dumb? Or didn’t he want to know? Or… She studied him carefully, thoughtfully, and sighed in relief. Not a crease, his expression open. He really didn’t have a clue.
The kids ran to the field, and Lila changed the subject. “Have you moved in yet?” When he shook his head, her hopes soared. “Have you changed your mind?”
Now his eyes narrowed. “Sorry to disappoint you. I’m having a piano delivered tomorrow.”
“A piano?” Such a big, permanent instrument.
“It is how I make my living,” Jason replied dryly.
“But a piano’s so…so…not portable! Why can’t you just use an electronic keyboard or something like that?” And not get so comfortable in Sea View House that you’ll never want to leave.
“I’ve got one of those, too. Why? Have you finally learned to play?”
She chuckled easily at that. “No, no. We leave all the music in Pilgrim Cove to the Parker family.”
He stared out at the ball field where the kids were throwing and catching. “Yeah,” he sighed. “The Parker family. But without Jared… He was the best of us.”
“No!” Her protest was instinctive. “No, he wasn’t,” she repeated more quietly. “You were both—so special. And you still are. Jared just…wanted it more at the time.”
Jason continued to watch the children in silence.
“Don’t make Jared into a larger-than-life person,” Lila said. “What happened was tragic, but he wasn’t a hero. I was there, remember? He dragged you from behind the wheel and got in. He was drunk and angry.”
Jason looked down at his hands, and Lila followed his movement. They were strong hands, big and broad and very masculine. “But I should have been able to stop him. I should have been stronger.” A thread of frustration, of blame, lingered in his voice, making her wince.
>
“How can you say that?” asked Lila. “You pulled me from the back seat before he took off. I was so scared. Thank goodness you weren’t drunk. I’d never seen either of you with more than a light buzz on.”
He barked more than laughed. Shook his head. “A light buzz? Lila, Lila…you don’t know anything. And, sweet girl, you don’t have to.”
Sweet girl? Pet name from the past. A boy’s way of being grown up to his girlfriend of the same age.
They stood behind the fence at home plate, just the two of them with no one else in earshot. The kids were taking turns at bat now.
“I’m glad you made peace with your family, Jason. And I’m so sorry about your mom and Valerie. It must have been…just overwhelming yesterday.”
“Yes, it was,” he replied. “But I got through it.”
His face was shadowed, stark. A tic throbbed in his jaw. She wished she could kiss the hurt away, at least put her arms around him, but that wouldn’t work now. “Look, Casey’s at bat.”
She saw him blink, then grin at the familiar line. He focused on the boy, cheering with her as Casey connected and sent a grounder between second and third.
“Good job, Case,” he called. His nephew turned and grinned, his new top teeth half-grown in. “What an imp.”
“For sure. Just ask him.”
He chuckled, then pointed to Katie, whose turn had come. She stood at home plate and allowed two pitches to go by.
“Good eye, Katie,” murmured Jason. “They were high.”
Then the girl connected, and the ball repeated the same trajectory Casey’s had taken. Hard grounder between second and third.
“Your sister may look like you, but she must take after your dad and brother. Tom must get a huge kick out of her.”
Her dad, Tom Sullivan, was athletic director at the high school; her brother, Steve, was a senior at Boston University and played football for them.
“Oh,” Lila said, her stomach in sudden knots, “we all get a real kick out of our Katie.”
LILA HEARD THE SOUND of a car pulling into the driveway and sighed with relief. Adam had arrived a few minutes early as she’d asked when she’d dropped Sara off after practice. She opened the back door before he could knock.
“All scrubbed and ready for dinner?” Lila directed her question to Sara and gave her a hug.
“Yes, I am. I’m hungry. Where’s Katie?”
Lila nodded toward the back of the house. “Hopefully in her room getting dressed.” The child ran off, and Lila looked at Adam. “Time is short and we have to talk about something important.”
“Sans children?”
She nodded. Then bit her lip. “It’s big.”
He reached for her. “Whatever it is, we can deal with it together.”
She so admired his calm, rational approach to life. “I hope so,” she replied. “It’s about…about Katie’s dad.” She had his attention.
“O-kay. What about him?”
She took a breath. “He’s in town. After so many years, he came back. No letter. No phone call. No warning. He simply showed up.”
“Does he want Katie?” Adam’s whispered question gave Lila chills. She shook her head.
“No. He thinks she’s my sister. Has no clue.”
His quiet chuckle surprised Lila, but he anticipated her protest. “I know it’s too serious to be funny. Your folks, however, must feel flattered.”
“I didn’t tell them. But I’m not finding his reappearance a laughing matter at all.”
Adam stepped in front of her and took her hands. Kissed her softly. “There’s nothing to worry about. You’re her mom. You’ve got sole custody. He cannot take her away from you…from us.”
His sincerity rang true in his confident tone, and Lila felt herself relax. “I wasn’t really concerned about custody. It’s just that he’ll start hanging around her, getting involved in her life if I tell him.”
“Lila! Of course you have to tell him. You can’t keep his daughter a secret. Especially in this town.”
“I know, I know,” said Lila. “But I’m not looking forward to telling him.”
Adam’s eyes narrowed. “Are you afraid?”
“Not physically. No. But…” She dismissed her concerns with a shrug. How could she explain the intensity of the love she and Jason had shared back then? It wasn’t something to share with a new man.
THE LOBSTER POT did a brisk business every night of the week, and that evening was no exception. When she arrived with Adam and the girls, Lila noted that the wide wraparound terrace sported a few full tables even though early May was still cool in New England. As they walked through the restaurant, a steady hum of conversation emanated from the three dining areas. With its wood-paneled walls and nautical theme, the place was known by some folks as the Good Ship Lobster Pot.
Her folks were already at the family table. Lila waited while the girls greeted Maggie and Tom, and then sat the children between herself and Adam. The girls were immediately lost in their own world of chatter.
Adam glanced at the kids, looked at Lila and rolled his eyes. Lila grinned in acknowledgment, taking in the whole picture they presented. They did make a good family. She just wished the little nervous tremor that shot through her stomach occasionally would disappear as quickly as it came. It would…as soon as she told Jason about Katie. And as soon as he disappeared.
“Sara’s never been happier—at least not since Eileen…hmm…passed away,” said Adam quietly. He inhaled hard, then looked at her over the kids’ heads. His poignant smile touched her heart. “Coming to Pilgrim Cove was a good choice.”
His hearty tone reassured her, and she reached over the girls and squeezed his shoulder. “I think so, too.” Adam was fighting to move forward, just as she was, and if they could help each other, so much the better.
Maggie’s laughter rang out just then, and Lila glanced at her mother who was teasing Lila’s dad, her eyes sparkling like a youngster’s.
“Your folks actually look young enough to be Katie’s parents,” Adam said softly, his voice laced with admiration.
As if to prove his statement, Maggie jumped from her seat to talk to one of the servers. Her energetic mother was never happier than when handling five tasks at once. The Lobster Pot was her baby—hers, and Lila’s aunt Thea’s—and nothing escaped either woman’s notice.
“One fact about this family,” said Lila, “is that everybody works hard.”
“I noticed,” said Adam, standing up to greet Bart.
“That’s because they all take after me!” Her granddad lost no time jumping into the conversation—and taking any credit he could grasp. “Look at this place,” he said. “My girls did everything. Even to the posters on the wall.”
Lila smiled at Bart’s unabashed pride. He didn’t believe in false modesty and was used to speaking his mind. But in this case, she had to admit he was right. Not only had her mom and aunt built the business from the ground up, but they imbued it with their personal touches outside the culinary area.
“Have I ever given you a guided tour of the decor?” she asked Adam. The wall decorations were special—a humorous tribute to the citizens of Pilgrim Cove.
He shook his head. “Of course I’ve seen the motto. It’s everywhere!”
Lila grinned and quoted, “The Lobster Pot— Where No Lobster is a Shrimp!” The words were written on the menus, on the door and on a large wall hanging in each of the three dining areas.
“But now check out the posters,” said Lila. “Look carefully and you’ll recognize people you’ve met.” She watched as he studied one, saw the moment when recognition dawned.
“That’s Katie’s uncle from the hardware store,” said Adam.
Lila nodded. “Every time a new poster gets added to the wall, I love it the best,” said Lila. “Look at the one about Jack Levine and Rachel Goodman. He’s a marine biologist from Maine, and she’s the assistant principal of the high school.”
She pointed at a large print w
ith a caricature of an overly muscled Jack standing on the deck of a boat, and Rachel with extremely long, shapely legs, fishing from the beach. The tagline said: “Jack floundered around the seven seas, Till Rachel said, ‘He’s my Maine squeeze.’”
“I wonder what they’ll come up with for us.” Adam smiled at Lila.
She shrugged. “Couldn’t venture a guess.”
Her mother’s voice came from behind her as Maggie walked back to her seat on the other side of Bart. “Don’t you worry, Adam. My sister and I will think up something very special.”
Bart glanced at his daughter, then grumbled something to Lila. “Say again?” Lila asked.
“Have you spoken with Jason yet?” He spoke quietly, nodding toward Katie.
Her granddad’s meaning was clear, but it was Maggie who spoke from the other side of her father. “There’s no hurry about telling him,” she said. “And he won’t be in town long. Maybe we could just—” she rippled her fingers through the air, a question in her voice “—overlook it?”
“Are you nuts?” Tom Sullivan half-stood up, sounding appalled, and Lila saw Bart lean against his chair, a satisfied smirk on his face. He’d let someone else run with the message as long as he’d planted the thought.
The two girls looked up at the sound of Tom’s voice, and Lila caressed each child’s shoulder, paying special attention to Adam’s daughter. “You know, Sara, that with this family, there’s always a lot of noise and conversation. Everything’s cool.”
Katie nodded. “She’s right.” The children went back to coloring their place mats.
Lila glanced at Adam. He created a circle with his thumb and forefinger in the universal gesture of “good job.” But he quickly glanced back at Maggie.
“You’re only kidding, right, Mrs. Sullivan? A man is entitled to know about his own child.” He glanced at Sara, his love for the little girl clearly visible, then resumed the conversation. “And the child has a right to know him.”
The Daughter He Never Knew Page 5
