by Bryony Kayn
“Toss me one of those,” he said to Steve and caught the cigarette the other man threw to him. He lit it, exhaling a stream of smoke before answering her question, “It doesn’t have a name yet. Talk to Steve. He’s the lyricist.”
“You write lyrics, too.”
“Not so much,” Angel said, looking at Jake. “Do you write anymore?”
She shook her head, putting her cigarette to her lips. “I gave that up.” She had once fronted her own band, called Jezebel. Jake had sung and wrote their lyrics.
“You shouldn’t have. You were good,” Steve said, putting his hand on her neck, under the fall of long hair. “I loved your lyrics.”
She lifted one shoulder eloquently. “I don’t sing anymore. No reason to write.” She laughed then, softly, though to Angel it sounded a little forced, “I doubt I have much of a voice left, anyway. Too long out of practice.”
“It’s like riding a bike. You don’t forget,” Steve told her, rubbing her neck gently. She closed her eyes, perhaps to enjoy the sensation.
“Have you guys had anything to eat?” Angel asked then, sensing that Jake didn’t really want to talk about it. “I was thinking about grabbing some dinner.”
“I’m starved,” Jake agreed quickly.
Jake woke early the next morning, stretching luxuriously as she looked around the bright, mostly bare room that was hers for the moment. She felt movement beside her and turned to see Steve’s unshaven face, dark curls tangled across his forehead. When he slept he looked—what was the word? Not innocent. Not peaceful. Maybe just not quite as hard. He may have been the hardest man Jake had ever known. He’d had a difficult life growing up, as she had. He had never surrendered to anything, as far as she knew. She had a lot of respect for him mixed in with all the other jumbled emotions.
She slowly turned onto her side, just taking in the sight of him. It wasn’t often that she had the opportunity to study him when he was unaware. She wanted to reach out and trace the curve of his cheek, the angle of his jaw covered in black stubble. She knew if she touched him, though, he’d wake up. He had always been a very light sleeper.
Jake had not been surprised the night before when Steve stayed over, and she wondered if Angel was aware he would probably be seeing a lot more of his friend. She smiled to herself. She still wasn’t committing herself to Steve, not after everything that had passed between them, but she did purely enjoy their physical relationship. He could turn her on with a touch or a look, and she had no inclination to fight it.
“What are you smiling about?” Steve whispered, and she realized he’d been watching her from between his long lashes. Now, he opened his eyes, and she lost herself in his dark, fathomless gaze.
“You,” she replied honestly and felt tears burn at the back of her eyes at the gentle smile that touched his lips. “I woke up wondering if I dreamed you.”
“I’m no dream,” he said, rolling onto his side and reaching to run his hand over her bare waist and hip. His hand was warm against her skin, and she sighed.
“Sometimes you’re my dream,” she contradicted, sliding closer to him, letting her fingers play up and down his back. “I suppose we should get up.”
“Hmm,” he muttered, eyes closed again. “Sometime…”
She chuckled, then exclaimed as he rubbed his rough cheek against hers. “You need to shave.”
“No beard?” he asked, grinning at her.
“No.”
He reached up to rub his chin, fingertips making a rasping sound. “You sure? I always thought I’d look good with a beard.”
“You’d look like a pirate,” she said. “You’re too good looking as you are. Don’t change anything.”
He smoothed a tangle of blond hair away from her face. “Thank you,” he said and smiled.
“You’re in way too good a mood this morning. It makes me nervous,” she said, pulling away from him.
He caught her wrist before she could slide out of the bed and placed a kiss in her palm. “I’ll try to develop an attitude,” he said and laughed when she pulled free of him.
“I’ll be in the shower,” she said, walking away from him without a backward look. “You’d better get a razor from Angel. I’m not kissing you until you shave.”
By the time he came into the bathroom, his face freshly shaven, Jake was out of the shower. She’d put on another pair of old cut-offs and a black halter top that left her back bare. She still wore a towel wrapped around her head.
“I saved you some hot water,” she said, glancing at him in the mirror. “That’s better,” she added before untwisting the towel and drying her hair with it.
“I’m ready for that kiss you promised me,” he said, waiting for her to hang the damp towel over the rack.
“Did I promise you a kiss?” she asked wonderingly, then giggled when he grabbed her and turned her around. He held her close, rubbing his cheek against hers again, and she smiled at the touch of his smooth skin. “That’s much better,” she said and gave him her mouth willingly.
When he released her mouth and began nibbling at her earlobe, she gasped, “If I don’t comb out my hair, we’ll have to cut it off.”
He nuzzled her throat, his hands roaming over her bare back. When he reached for the tie of the halter top at the small of her back, she caught his hand with her own.
“Steve,” she said, shaking her head.
“You can shower again. With me.”
The look in his eyes was eloquent, and his hands on her flesh almost impossible for her to deny. She despaired inside at how easily he could make her cave in. He could get her to delay anything, anytime, when he looked at her like that. Heat flared through her, and her nipples hardened. Without bothering to waste breath in argument, she let him untie the top.
When they finally made an appearance in the kitchen, Angel was sitting at the table in the breakfast nook drinking coffee. It had been almost an hour since Steve had awakened him to ask for a razor, laughing as he explained Jake’s demand. Now both were freshly showered and dressed, their hair damp and hanging down their backs.
“Morning, Angel,” Jake said, dropping a kiss on his cheek as she passed him on her way to the coffee pot.
“Morning,” he returned with a smile, thinking that he was going to like seeing her every morning
“Thanks for the razor. You saved me,” Steve said, sitting across the table from the guitarist. He seemed almost insufferably smug, and Angel suddenly found himself thinking that he needed to find some feminine companionship of his own.
“No problem.”
Jack came back to the table carrying two cups of coffee, one for herself and one for Steve. “Do you need some more?”
Angel checked his cup and nodded. “Sure, if you don’t mind.”
She took his cup back into the kitchen to refill it and brought it back to him. She took a seat next to Steve, pulling one foot up onto the edge of her seat, her knee pulled up against her chest. “What’s on the agenda?” she asked.
“I told T.J. I’d be over later this morning,” Steve said, opening a pack of cigarettes. “We’re starting to lay down tracks on the songs that we’ve already written.”
At her blank look, Angel said, “T.J. has a studio at his place. Most of the recording will be done there.”
She nodded, taking the cigarette Steve had just lit.
“You comin’ over, too?” Steve asked Angel, lighting another cigarette for himself.
“Yeah, I was planning on it,” Angel said, catching Jake’s eyes. “How about you? You want to tag along?”
She smiled. “Sure. I wouldn’t mind seeing you guys at work.”
“I’ll give him a call and see when he wants to start,” Steve offered, pulling out his cell phone and speed-dialing the number.
When T.J. answered, Steve got up and walked around the counter into the kitchen, and Jake rested her chin on her knee, gazing at Angel. When he said nothing, she asked softly, “Are you upset with me?”
“Why sho
uld I be?”
She shrugged. “Me and Steve.”
He set his coffee down and leaned back in his chair, long legs stretched under the table almost to where she sat. Lots of things went through his mind, but he couldn’t see that saying any of them would change anything. Finally, he just said, “Why should I be upset about you and Steve? You two are my best friends.”
She just looked at him.
“Okay, man. We’ll be there in a bit,” Steve said, coming back to the table as he laughed at something T.J. said. “’K, bye.” He ended the call and sat back in his chair. “He said we should come over now if we don’t have anything pressing. Marlo’s already on his way over.”
“Cool,” Angel said, taking a swallow of coffee.
“I’ve gotta stop at home and grab some notes,” Steve said to Jake. “You want to ride with me?”
She smiled at him but shook her head. “I think I’ll ride with Angel. You and I have a tendency to get sidetracked.”
“I didn’t hear you complain,” he said into her ear, obviously not caring that Angel could hear.
She turned her head to kiss him, appearing to enjoy his attention. But she pulled away after a moment, glancing at Angel from the corner of her eye. “I still think I’ll ride with Angel. It’ll be quicker that way.”
Steve conceded with a shrug, his hand still against the small of her back. “Walk me to my car, then?” he asked, and she nodded, leaving the kitchen with him.
When she returned fifteen minutes later, her face flushed, she looked at Angel challengingly. “Go ahead and say it.”
He raised his hands to either side, palms up in a sign of surrender. “What do you want me to say?”
“That I’m being an idiot for going along with him. That I’m asking for trouble giving him what he wants. That I should be smart enough not to fall back into the same trap,” she said, pulling out the chair next to his to sit down.
He reached forward and held her hands between his own. “You have to do what feels right, Jake, regardless of what that is.”
“That’s the problem,” she said softly. “What feels right is usually what gets me in the most trouble.”
Chapter 3
Jake pulled into the parking lot of the Neon, going around back to where the employees parked. The club wasn’t open yet, so the public lot was deserted. Behind the building, however, four other vehicles were already parked. Jake pulled Angel’s red convertible in next to the building, being excessively cautious with the car. She’d been driving for years but had never driven anything as nice as this car. She didn’t want to get a mark on it, even though she knew Angel would probably laugh it off.
She’d spent several hours at T.J.’s house, listening to the guys work and watching closely as T.J. showed her what the many dials and switches were for on the console. For the most part, they were laying down tracks for drums and guitars; Steve wouldn’t start recording for a few more days, possibly even weeks. Even so, as T.J., Marlo, and then Angel took turns in the soundproof room, Steve sang to her softly so she could hear the lyrics that had already been written. She’d thrilled at the sound of his voice. The rough-edged tone had always touched something deep inside her, and it had been years since she’d heard him sing in person.
As the time grew closer for her to leave for work, Angel had tossed his keys to her. “Go ahead and take my car. When we get done here, we’ll head on down to the club.”
“Thanks, sweetheart,” she’d said, giving him a hug and a peck on the cheek. She’d driven back to Angel’s house and changed into some of the new clothes Steve had bought for her. Then she’d raced back to Hollywood to get to work before opening.
Now, she made sure Angel’s car was securely locked, and turned to enter the building. She almost missed a step when she saw Swan. He had just come out the open service door and stopped when he saw her.
“Hey, Swan,” she said, continuing toward him.
He stayed where he was, blocking her way to the door. “Hey, Jake,” he said, and his voice was soft, even if his expression was somewhat forbidding. “We need to talk.”
She shook her head, giving him only a small, tight smile. “No, we talked yesterday. I need to get in to work.”
He didn’t yield, putting his hands on her shoulders to hold her. “We need to talk without him around.”
She tilted her head to one side, looking up at him. “Do you think I’m going to say anything different just ’cause Steve’s not around? I told you yesterday that things weren’t going to work out between us.”
“They were working just fine until he showed up here—”
“Things change,” she said bluntly. “Look, I certainly didn’t intend to hurt you, but it’s not like we were engaged or anything.”
“Jake, please,” he started, trying to pull her closer, but she ducked and twisted out of his grasp and stopped just out of his reach.
“Don’t ever try to force me, Swan. You won’t like what happens,” she said, glaring at him. Her heart was racing, and not in a good way.
His mouth dropped open. “Force you?” he protested. “Never! I just want you to—”
“You just want me to do what you want me to do,” she cut in. “I like you, Swan, and that’s a fact. But for the time being, you need to stay away from me. You’ll be safer that way.” She turned her back on him and walked into the club, trying not to dwell on the hurt she’d seen in his eyes. Under her breath, she added, “And so will I.”
When the members of Blackstone arrived at the Neon Club a couple hours later, the party was in full swing. The band was rocking out on stage, almost all the tables were occupied, and the dance floor was packed with people.
Angel walked up to the bar and asked Don, “Is Jake around?”
The bartender motioned with his head toward the stage, and Angel turned to see Jake in the crowd of dancers. She was backed up against Nikky, doing a bump and grind with him while he held her close against him. She was grinning, a sheen of sweat on her face, and she seemed to be enjoying herself an awful lot.
“Little slut,” Steve said, but he was smiling. He’d seen Jake and Nikky like this too many times to take it too seriously. If any other man had been touching her like Nikky was, however, Steve would never have put up with it.
“Jack and Coke,” Angel said to Don, flipping bills out onto the bar in exchange for the drink. “You see any open tables?” Angel asked, turning back to Steve.
Steve shook his head, his gaze all for the two blonds on the dance floor.
When the song ended, Jake turned and hung one arm over Nikky’s shoulder while she spoke into his ear. He smiled down at her with genuine affection, then looked up and caught Steve’s gaze. He said something to her, and she turned her head, searching. In just a moment, she saw Steve. She raised a hand in greeting and turned back to Nikky. She dropped a kiss on the corner of his mouth, then started back through the crowd toward the bar.
She reached Steve a minute later, responding warmly to the kiss he gave her. Angel glanced at the stage and noted the expression on Swan’s face. Jake had given him the rundown on what had happened between Swan and Steve at the motel. She was worried that Steve was going to take it further than it needed to go, but Angel found himself wondering if it wouldn’t be the other man who pushed his luck.
“By the way,” she said, touching Angel’s arm to get his attention, “Love the car!”
He laughed. “I thought you might. Red’s your color.”
“No, fast is my color,” she replied with a grin. “I’ll borrow that car any time you’ll let me.”
“Do you even have a license?” Steve asked, one eyebrow raised quizzically.
She flipped her hand up in the air, a signal of indifference. “I have—well, it’ll pass if I ever get pulled over.” She laughed at the look Angel gave her. “Don’t worry, babe. I won’t get pulled over.”
“What kind of ID do you have?” Angel asked, suddenly concerned.
She leaned in clos
e and said softly in his ear, “The expensive, illegal kind. It’s the only kind I can get.”
He cocked his head, looking at her uncertainly. In the old days, everyone knew she had fake ID because she wasn’t legally old enough to work the club. She had always been fairly secretive about her past, not caring to discuss it with more than two or three close friends, but he had to wonder why she still hadn’t gotten legal identification.
She laughed and reached up to pinch his cheek. “Don’t worry so much, babe.” Then, with a last kiss for Steve, she was off making the rounds of her tables.
“You’re not surprised, are you?” Steve asked, an ironic smile on his lips. “When we got signed and I finally had some money to burn, I hired a detective to track her down. He couldn’t find shit. There’s no Jaklyn Stewart who matches her age or description. She doesn’t exist, as far as the authorities are concerned.”
Angel realized his mouth was hanging open, and closed it. Steve had hired someone to find Jake? He’d had no idea.
“That’s why this time, I’m not going to let her get away. ’Cause if I lose her again, I’ll never get her back,” Steve finished calmly, then turned to the bar to order a drink of his own.
They settled into a sort of routine over the next few weeks. Steve spent most nights at Angel’s house with Jake, except for the few occasions that Jake stayed at Steve’s. They spent hours almost every day at T.J.’s studio working on the new album, and Jake enjoyed watching them. She even started helping out a bit on the mixing board, under T.J.’s careful tutelage. Then when it was time for Jake to head to the Neon, they’d either wrap things up and go with her or she would borrow either Steve’s or Angel’s car and drive herself.
Jake was surprised at how well she and Steve were getting along. The physical side of their relationship had always been intense, but that was part of the reason they’d fought so much. Now, it was like they were completely in harmony with each other. There’d been no real arguments, other than their disagreement concerning Steve’s attitude toward Swan. She had made a point not to let Steve know the other man was still interested in her.
