He couldn’t for the life of him understand why he wasn’t more happy or relieved about this. Surely he hadn’t been secretly hoping to rope Vi into the job? She would hate it, the boys would suffer, and he’d end up firing her. Not a good situation all around. His boys came first; his libido came second, even though it was fighting for the top spot. He wouldn’t let that happen.
Besides, hadn’t he decided a few nights ago to end it in a month anyway?
With a sigh, he called Vi and waited for her to answer.
“Hi,” she said, sounding sleepy.
“Hey,” he responded, forcing himself to swallow around an odd lump in his throat. “I found a nanny. She starts on Saturday.” He held his breath, waiting for her response.
“Thank God.”
He frowned into the phone. Vi’s obvious relief irritated him. He wanted her to be disappointed, but he wasn’t sure why. They were having sex. They weren’t in a relationship. The less she hung out with him and his boys the better. It’d been a stupid idea to ask her to play nanny anyway. His mother sure as hell had seen through it. Just as she saw through everything.
Only this morning, his mother told him to have Vi come for dinner instead of sneaking in after midnight as though Matt were ashamed of her. She’d then given Matt one of those chastising looks that made him feel five years old again and caught stealing his brother’s Legos. He’d tried to tell his mother they were just having no-strings fun, but what guy wanted to discuss such details with his mother? Definitely not this guy. His mother would soon be gone, and he could sneak Vi in and out without anyone passing judgment, at least not anyone he cared about.
“Matt? You still there?”
He gripped the phone tighter. “Yeah. Still here,” he answered tightly.
“Is something wrong?”
“Nothing’s wrong. It’s all good. I leave in a week on a road trip.”
“Good. When does she start?”
“She starts next Saturday. Mom leaves for the cruise on Sunday.”
“Cutting it close, aren’t you?”
“A little, but my mom deserves this vacation with her friends. She’s put her life on hold too long for the boys and me.”
“It must be wonderful to have a mom like that.” Vi sounded wistful, even a little envious.
“Yeah, I’m lucky. I had great parents.” Obviously, Vi had not. Somehow that didn’t surprise him. She never talked about her family. For all he knew she’d been dropped by the stork straight into adulthood. He tried to picture a younger Vi with purple pigtails, a pink pony tattoo, and a dress in purple and orange or something equally hideous. He couldn’t picture little girl Vi, though. Maybe for the better, because Vi was all woman.
His mom was right. No need to sneak her into the house. She could come for dinner, hang for a while, and after the boys went to bed, they could go to bed. Still, it seemed weird with his mother in the house. It wasn’t as if Vi were his girlfriend. Or ever would be. She didn’t fit any image he’d ever had of a girlfriend. Not the way his ex had. He shuddered at the thought. Look where that’d gotten him.
“Are you coming over tonight?”
“I’m coming tonight, and so are you.”
He laughed. “Then that’s a yes.”
“I’ll be there with bells on.”
“Oh, I like that idea.” He hesitated. “Why don’t you come early—for dinner?”
She didn’t respond right away. “That’s not a good idea.”
“Mom insists. She knows you sneak in every night.”
“She does?”
“She knows everything. Don’t ask me how, but she’s always been psychic when it comes to her kids.”
“This isn’t a good idea.”
“Please, she’s only going to be around another week. She’d like to see you.” His mother hadn’t said anything like that, but Vi didn’t know. He wanted to see her. In fact, he wanted to see her more than just in his bed for wild sex. He liked sparring with her. This realization shocked the shit out of him. “We have one percent organic milk.”
She laughed. “Well, in that case—are you sure?”
No, he wasn’t sure. In fact, he was sure it was a phenomenally stupid idea, but he wanted her here anyway. “Yes, I’m positive. The boys would like to see you.”
“Your boys?”
“What other boys would I be talking about?”
She choked. “I—uh, none.”
“We eat at six. See you then.” He ended the call before she could protest.
He wanted her to come for dinner—and after dinner. He wanted to hang out with her and debate gun control or climate change or pipelines in Alaska. He wanted more than sex.
He wanted things he shouldn’t want.
That one-month limit needed to become a reality.
* * * *
The sun hadn’t risen yet, and Vi was wide-awake. She’d been staring at the ceiling all night. Matt, on the other hand, had fallen asleep after sex and been out like a light, not a care in the world. Must be nice. She wished she could say the same.
Something was going on with him. Vi listened to her intuition. She liked to call it her Inner Vi, and Inner Vi was setting off warning bells.
He was going to dump her. She reminded herself they didn’t really have a relationship to dump, but whatever they had, he was going to end it. She had known this wouldn’t last. It couldn’t. She drank green tea with lemon. He drank Folgers coffee. She refused to buy any products that used live animals for testing. He probably didn’t realize such things happened. She marched in protests in downtown Seattle and on campus to bring about change. He was perfectly happy with things the way they were.
She braced herself, while telling Inner Vi this was for the best.
Matt rolled away from her and yanked on his jeans, then sat at the edge of the bed. She pulled the covers up to her chin and clutched them. Her stomach nose-dived and stayed there. All the good feelings from her multiple orgasms faded like smoke into the atmosphere.
He kept his back to her. She stayed where she was. She would not argue. She’d go quietly. This was for the best. She had no business falling for a conservative man with two kids.
Falling?
Had she done that?
She didn’t fall for a man. That was high school shit. Vi was so over being any man’s everything or anything.
He cleared his throat. She sat up in bed and gripped the comforter so hard her knuckles turned white.
“Vi…” he began, sounding choked up himself, but she must be imagining such emotion from him and hearing what she wanted to hear. The cosmos giveth and the cosmos taketh away. Matt had only been on loan, a gift for all she’d suffered.
She didn’t say anything, just waited for the lead ball to drop on her heart, knocking sense into her with I-told-you-so reprimands.
“I—you know this—this thing between us—isn’t going anywhere, right?”
“Of course,” she croaked, mimicking the frogs in the nasty green pond behind her grandmother’s single-wide. Flu-like symptoms raged through her body.
“Vi, I’m struggling. We were supposed to be temporary.”
“We are.” She braced herself. Here it came. The inevitable.
“I’m finding it hard to end this. I think we need a deadline.”
“A deadline?” Did that mean he wasn’t going to cut her off right now? Being an in-the-moment kind of girl, her heart soared with relief.
“Yeah. We need to end it—eventually—before one of us gets hurt, or my boys get too attached.”
“Your boys aren’t attached to me. They look at me as if I’m a fascinating exhibit at the Pacific Science Center.”
“Well, there is that.” He chuckled, his back shaking from the laughter. He turned slightly, giving her a good view of his proud profile and strong chin.
Vi peeked out from under the pile of blankets and met his penetrating gaze. She loved his intensity, how he gave his best to everything he did. In that way, they were
alike, two passionate people willing to give all for things they believed in. She wanted to make the world a better place, while he wanted to make sure those close to him were in a better place. Maybe they weren’t so different after all.
“Are you disappointed?”
“Of course not,” she lied, shocked to realize she’d been harboring hope they could become something more.
Stupid, delusional Vi.
Even if he had been willing to go for more, he wouldn’t be once he knew the truth about her, what she did and where she’d been.
“What do you suggest?” Her fingers itched to touch him, but she held back. He needed to have his say without distractions from her.
“One month. Then we call it quits.”
“One month? From today?”
“Yeah. Does that work for you?” His gaze was hopeful.
“That works for me.” She winked at him as if she hadn’t a care in the world.
He grinned back. His smile lit up her dark places. One month. Perhaps prolonging the inevitable, but she’d take it. “It’s like we’re going on a vacation that has to end so we enjoy every moment while we can.”
He nodded. “And we’ll always have the memories.”
“Yes, the memories.” In one month that’s all she’d have. Her heart ached the way it had when her sister betrayed her. She hadn’t felt that pain in a long time. She’d hardened her heart to it. How had he managed to weasel his way past her carefully constructed defenses?
If she were smart, she’d tell him the month time limit was only prolonging the inevitable and making it harder in the long run. She wasn’t smart. She wanted every last second with him she could squeeze out of the next month.
“So I’ll just sneak in and out at night and—”
He held up a hand and shook his head. “That would be the best thing for both of us and the boys, but it’s not what I want.”
“What do you want?”
“I want to spend time with you and have you spend time with us. Hang out. Go on the boat with us. Maybe go on a hike. Or come to a game.”
“A hike? Boating?”
“Don’t look so skeptical. I’m an outdoors guy.”
She nodded slowly. The outdoors was messy. She couldn’t imagine him tolerating something he couldn’t organize into neat little boxes.
“What’ll you tell the boys?”
“I’ll tell them that you’re only going to be around for a month. They’ll know right up front that you’ll be gone.”
This whole thing sounded like a stupid idea, and she didn’t think she could do it. He was asking her to play his girlfriend for a month, then go away as if nothing had ever happened, as if doing so wouldn’t break her heart, as if he meant nothing. It was too much.
“No, that won’t work. Hanging with you is a stupid idea. I’ll sleep with you. That’s all.”
His jaw tightened, and his brown eyes narrowed. “You’re right. We shouldn’t pretend this is more than it is, but it goes against the grain for me to be with a woman only for sex.”
“If you want a month with me, all you get is sex.” She couldn’t do more than that. She had to protect herself, just as she’d protected herself her entire life because no one else had cared enough to protect her.
Matt wasn’t any different from the rest, even if she might be fool enough to think he could be.
She was a stripper, for God’s sake. A guy like Matt would never understand why she danced for a living and enjoyed it. Nor would he understand those two years she’d spent behind bars. He’d led a sheltered life, and she’d lived a life without a shelter.
She could take care of herself. She always had.
Chapter 11—Hook Check
Matt’s phone was ringing. He rolled over and reached blindly for it. Squinting at the alarm clock, he noted it was almost nine. He rarely slept in. He was a creature of habit. He liked to rise early, have a cup of coffee, and go for a run. Thanks to his marathon sex session with Vi last night, he’d slept like a baby once they’d worn each other out with more orgasms than he could count.
He put the phone up to his ear.
“Hello,” he said gruffly.
“Matt?” The female voice on the other end of the line was way too cheery.
“Yeah?”
“It’s Cindy. I have some bad news.”
He tried to process what she was saying. Sitting up in bed, he rubbed his eyes with his free hand. “What bad news?”
“It’s about your nanny. She can’t start for another month. Her daughter was in a car accident and has broken bones. She’s needed to take care of the grandchildren until her daughter recovers enough to do so herself.”
“What?” His bleary brain stalled like a computer with a failing hard drive as he stumbled over her words. “My nanny?”
“Yeah. I’m trying to find someone else on short notice, but I’m not having any luck.”
“My mom leaves on Sunday. It’s already Friday.”
“I know. I’m sorry. Maybe Amelia—”
“Fuck,” he breathed.
“I’ll keep checking around and get back to you.”
“Thanks,” he growled, feeling anything but thankful. In fact, he understood why someone would want to shoot the messenger. He hit the End button and threw the phone on the nightstand.
Matt rolled onto his back and put his hands behind his head. “Damn it.”
“Matt? What’s wrong?”
He did a double take. He hadn’t realized Vi was still in his bed. Usually she stole out early in the morning before sunrise and before his boys got up for school. “My nanny can’t take the job for a month.”
“But your mom—”
“I know.”
She cringed at the grouchiness in his voice.
“Sorry. I’m just frustrated. I have a game tonight and leave on a road trip on Monday. How am I going to find someone to watch the boys in such a short time? Amelia could do it, but I can’t expect her to sleep here every night. Macy has school.”
“She would help you out. I know she would.”
“On weekends, yeah. My kids go to school on the other side of Seattle. Not to mention, the houseboat is so small. Three energetic kids running around that place for a week? Amelia would jump off the dock, swim away, and never come back. Brick would kick my ass. I need someone during the week.”
An idea formed in his head, a stupid, ridiculous idea that he was damn sure he’d regret. “You could really be my nanny. During the week only.”
She looked at him as if he’d asked her to murder a puppy.
“Just for a month,” he rushed to add.
“Are you crazy? I’m not good with kids.”
“The boys like you.”
“The boys tolerate me. That’s a long way from liking. Besides, I can’t cook. At least not anything they’d eat.”
“The exposure to alternative food sources would be a good experience for them.” He reached out and pulled her into his arms. “And exposing yourself to me every night would be even better.”
“You’re proposing I live here for a month?”
“Uh, uh, uh. Yeah.”
“I have a job. I work nights Thursday through Saturday.”
“We can hire a babysitter to stay with them on Thursday night. Tiff has done some babysitting for Brick and Amelia. She’s a nice girl, and very responsible. Amelia can help out on weekends while you’re at work.”
Vi shook her head. “I’m not good with kids, and I don’t want to be around kids twenty-four-seven. For that matter, I don’t want to be around you that much, either. We’d kill each other. You don’t buy organic. You don’t compost. And you’re not diligent about recycling.”
“I bought organic milk and banned Styrofoam from the house.” Matt grinned, certain he was wearing her down.
“Matt—”
“How about a compromise? You’d only be expected to stay here while I’m on road trips. I can figure something else out for home games.”
/> She hedged, opening her mouth to once again protest.
He interrupted. “I can pay you well. That piece of crap car you drive? You’ll be able to afford a newer model by the time you’re done.”
“I love Hermie.”
He snorted. “Hermie doesn’t love you. He broke down on you last week after work. Midnight is not the time to be stranded on a dark street.”
Vi glared at him; he beamed back.
“Please,” he said. “I’ll let you use handcuffs on me.”
One corner of her mouth kicked upward. “Okay, how much?”
“Five hundred a night.”
She choked on her tongue. “Five hundred?”
“Yeah. Is it not enough?”
“Road trips only?”
“Road trips only,” he agreed pleasantly.
“What about a generous donation to climate change research?”
“I can do that, too. Five figures?” The woman could be bought, and he’d gratefully pay her price.
She nodded. “Okay, I’ll do it. One road trip. That’s it. Two thousand dollars, and ten thousand donated to the charity of my choice.”
“Sounds good.” He’d figure something out after that. Or he wouldn’t. Vi didn’t fool him. She was a pushover, and he had her sexy, tattooed body right where he wanted it.
“Oh, by the way. I forgot to mention something.” The wicked gleam in her eyes would’ve set him back on his heels if he’d been standing.
“What’s that?”
“I have a cat.”
His mouth dropped open. “A cat?”
“Yes, a cat. A fur-shedding, furniture-scratching, litter-box-pooping cat, and I can’t leave him alone for more than a night. He has separation anxiety. He’ll have to come here.”
“Separation anxiety?” Matt scowled. She’d pulled a fast one on him, not that he’d had a choice. A desperate man put up with an odd cat here and there, especially when it was attached to a hot lady.
Penalty Play (Seattle Sockeyes Hockey) Page 11
