“Hey, what’s up?” Meredith asked. “I thought maybe you weren’t speaking to me.”
“You mean after you set Dad on me today?”
“How’d that go?”
“I’ll tell you later – ” Anna’s voice broke.
“What’s wrong?”
“Just – just everything,” she sobbed. Then she poured out all that she’d just learned and begged Meredith to come rescue her from the party.
“Sure,” Meri said. “Jackson’s already in bed and Todd is parked in front of the TV. I’ll be right over.”
“I’ll meet you on the street,” Anna said. “I think I can sneak out the back door.”
“Okay. Give me ten minutes.”
“Thanks.”
15
After making a smooth getaway, Anna reassured her sister that she would be fine at home by herself. And after she changed into her pajamas and calmed herself with a glass of warm milk, she wondered if she hadn’t simply overreacted to everything. The truth was, she had no proof that Michael was cheating on her. Naturally Meredith assumed that was the only possible explanation. And Anna had to admit it didn’t look good. But then Anna remembered Michael’s tenderness toward her earlier that evening. The sweet way he’d walked her into the party.
Anna turned and looked at the clock. The party! It was after ten now, and Michael was probably looking for her. She grabbed the phone and called his cell. It wasn’t turned on, but she left a message anyway.
“I’m sorry,” she said. “But I got sick to my stomach at the party. I could see you were having a good time, so I called and asked Meri to pick me up. I’m at home now and feeling better. Please, don’t worry about me and stay as long as you like. Bye.” There, she thought, that should smooth this over. At least for the time being. She had no idea what she’d say to him tomorrow.
But tomorrow came, and Michael, other than being concerned for her health, seemed perfectly normal. But as they were driving home from church, his cell phone rang, and she listened as he talked. It sounded like he was talking to Grant, but she couldn’t be sure. And it sounded as if he was going to leave for a business trip, maybe even by tomorrow.
“Are you sure it can’t wait until after Christmas?” he asked, then waited. “No, I understand. And no more than two days? You’re positive?” He sighed. “Okay. No, it’s fine. I don’t mind.” Now he chuckled. “Well, that would be great. Let’s hope so.” Then he closed his phone and slipped it back into his blazer pocket.
“Was that Grant?”
“Yes. We have a big account that we’ve been working on, and they’re about to make up their mind. But Grant says if one of us doesn’t go up to Seattle, we won’t have a chance.”
“Why doesn’t he go?”
“It’s Martha’s Christmas ballet tomorrow night.”
“Wow, they scheduled that pretty close to Christmas.”
“You know how crazy schedules get. Anyway, he can’t miss it.”
“So you’re going to Seattle?”
“Yes.”
“Hey, maybe I could go too?”
He turned and glanced at her. “You could . . . but I’ll mostly be in meetings. And airfare at this late notice, and during the holidays, well, it won’t be cheap. Plus it’ll be a madhouse at the airports. You really want to subject yourself to that?”
“I guess not.”
“And you said you weren’t feeling well last night. What if you’re coming down with something? It’d be a drag to be sick for Christmas.”
She sighed. “I suppose so . . .” Then she tried not to imagine some pretty college ingenue flying up to Seattle with him, snuggled together in the plane, holding hands, sharing a blanket. She tried not to think of some swanky city hotel and the cool restaurant where the two of them would sit, head to head, laughing about how they had pulled off this little holiday rendezvous. She knew she was being ridiculous.
As it turned out, Michael left that evening. That way he would be there first thing in the morning, ready to make his presentation and schmooze as needed. “I’ll just leave the car at the airport,” he had told her as he packed his bags. “It’s only for two nights.”
Two nights . . . what could happen in two nights? What had already happened? But she hadn’t voiced these fears, she had simply nodded and said that it sounded like a good plan. But when he kissed her good-bye, she held back. He assumed it was because she felt left out, and he promised to make good when he came home on Tuesday night. “And don’t forget,” he reminded her. “You said this was going to be the best Christmas ever, Anna.”
How could she forget? Those words would probably come back to haunt her for – for how long? Realistically, it probably would be only a matter of months . . . certainly not years. If anything, her longing for a perfect Christmas could haunt Michael for years. Who knew what his next Christmas would be like? But then again, perhaps it would be a relief for him. It would make everything so much simpler. He would be the sad widower. And Dad was right, Michael probably would cry. It would seem unnatural if he didn’t. And he’d probably wait an appropriate amount of time before he remarried his new young love. She tried to imagine next Christmas. Meredith would probably be married to this mysterious Cooper by then. And Michael would probably bring his new girlfriend. How different things would be in just one year.
For two long days, Anna tormented herself with these thoughts. She also did all the things that she figured a wife who suspected her husband of cheating might do. She went through drawers and pockets, and checked bills and receipts and phone records. But really she didn’t find anything very questionable. There seemed to be only two distinct possibilities: (1) Michael was an expert at hiding his trail, or (2) Michael was innocent. By Tuesday afternoon, she decided – after much prayer – to do her best to accept option two. She even planned a nice dinner for him – a welcome home. And while they ate dinner, she would confess to him all that she had heard and her concerns. And he, naturally, would explain everything. And then, somehow, they would make the most of Christmas.
Of course, by now her expectation level for the holiday had diminished greatly. Despite the fact that snow was beginning to fly, she knew that this Christmas wouldn’t be the perfect one she’d dreamed of. For one thing, the car engine had not arrived, and at this rate, she knew it was totally impossible to have it installed by Christmas even if it did get here. Still, she had her placeholder gift all ready for Michael. She’d found a very cool card with a picture on the front of an MG that looked a lot like his, and she’d put the gift certificate and the picture of the engine inside. And the mechanic was scheduled for the following week, and according to David, it was highly likely that the car would be running by New Year’s Eve. That seemed the best she could do now. And, to be honest, there was a part of her that had ceased to care. And . . . she missed her dishes.
As Anna organized things for the dinner she planned to serve on Christmas for some of her family, including her neighbor Bernice, she longed for a fine set of china to serve it on. She tried not to imagine her elegant Meissen set on Loraine’s table, and, although she knew it would look beautiful, she also knew she would feel jealous to see other people using it. And she knew it was immature and selfish, but she wished that china was still hers.
So what if it had been stored in crates. And so what if it didn’t go with the style of their house . . . she had loved it anyway. And now she missed it desperately. Even so, she knew that it was worth the exchange. She knew she’d done the right thing. What good would those dishes be after she was gone anyway? No one but a person like Loraine would appreciate them like Anna had. And at least Michael would have his car – and hopefully some happy memories to go with it. Wasn’t that worth it?
Anna set the table with her everyday dishes, which were actually very nice. She had everything ready to go for Michael’s welcome-home dinner when she noticed the snow coming down harder now. She also noticed that Huntley was antsy, just like her second graders would be under
the same circumstances. Her old beagle knew there was some exciting weather going on outside, and he needed to check it out. “You want to go for a walk?” she asked, and he wagged his tail. “Okay, just a quick one . . . long enough for you to taste some snow.” She put on her heavy coat, wrapped a scarf around her head and neck, and shoved her feet into her boots, and they were ready to go.
It really was beautiful out. The sky had a dusky purple cast to it, and the snowflakes illuminated in the streetlights were tumbling down. Huntley sniffed at the snow and even bit at some of the falling flakes, and Anna simply looked up in wonder. They really were going to have a white Christmas after all. Maybe she had given up too soon. Maybe this really was going to be the best Christmas ever. She walked along happily, admiring how ordinary things like cars and houses and trees took on a completely new and wonderful appearance with a fine white coat of snow. Maybe that was like forgiveness . . . or how love covered a multitude of sins. Maybe that’s how she needed to see Michael tonight. Not that he had even sinned. She didn’t know that for sure. And the more she thought about it, the less likely it seemed. Still, she decided as she walked back to the house, if he had sinned, she would choose to forgive him. Oh, definitely, she’d need God’s help. But she would do her best to forgive him. And, really, she’d wanted to give him the best Christmas present ever . . . what could be better than forgiveness?
As she turned the corner to their house, she hoped that Michael’s car would be parked out front. His flight should’ve gotten in by now. But the street was empty and white. She shook the snow off her coat and scarf and brushed it from Huntley’s back, then went inside to see that the message light on the phone was flashing. She pushed the message button and listened.
“Anna,” a crackly voice that sounded like Michael said. “I’m stuck at Sea-Tac right now. All the flights are delayed thanks to this winter storm. I’m trying to get out, but it’s not looking good. I may be stuck in Seattle until morning. I’d call you on my cell, but it was dead when I got to the airport. I’ll try to find an outlet to charge it. But this place is a madhouse. Just be thankful you’re not here, sweetie. Talk to you later.”
Later, when Anna didn’t hear back from him, she tried to call his cell but only got his voicemail. So she told him she missed him and she loved him and to take care, and then she cried herself to sleep. She knew that she was being silly and melodramatic and that things would probably look much better in the morning, but she just couldn’t help herself. It all seemed so hopeless. She wondered why she even tried. And when she attempted to pray, she felt like every ounce of faith had already been spent. It wasn’t that she’d given up on God, but she just didn’t have the energy or the words to hold on anymore. Hopefully he was holding on to her.
16
As it turned out, things did look better in the morning. Not only was the sun shining down on about four inches of crisp, white snow, but David called to announce that Michael’s engine had arrived last night. “It’s at British Motors right now,” he told her. “Ron said that it’s a beauty.”
“Really?” she cried. “That’s awesome.”
“I was thinking that I could pick up the car when you guys are heading over to Dad’s tonight.”
“You don’t mind?”
“No, I’m having fun with this. Besides, I’m earning my chance to take it out for a spin, right?”
“Of course.”
“So, I thought I could drop Celeste at Dad and Donna’s and then make an excuse to run some errand. By then you guys will be on your way, and Ron will meet me to trailer it up.”
“He doesn’t mind?”
“He thinks what you’re doing is so cool, Anna. In fact, he can’t wait to meet you.”
“Really?”
“Yeah. Just make sure you leave the garage door unlocked, okay?”
“No problem. We never lock it anyway.”
“Michael is going to be so jazzed.”
“That is, if he gets home.”
“Huh?”
She explained about the weather and cancellations.
“Oh, yeah, I heard the storm really messed with some West Coast flights.”
“I haven’t heard from him this morning,” she said.
“Maybe that means he’s on his way.”
“Maybe . . .”
“Well, whenever he does get here, he’s gonna love his Christmas present, Anna. You can count on that.”
“I hope so.”
When Michael finally did call, it was past noon. “It looks like the flight is going to go,” he told her. “I would’ve called you sooner, but I wanted to wait until I was sure. We’ve been sitting on this plane since 8:30.”
“You’re kidding.”
“Nope. And it’s getting old. But I should be home around three . . . well, maybe four by the time I get out of the airport.”
“Dad’s expecting everyone at six.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
“I love you, Michael,” she said, feeling a little uncertain . . . as if he might not feel the same way about her anymore.
“I love you too, Anna. I can’t wait to wish you Merry Christmas.”
“Me too. Fly safely.”
Anna hung up and, as usual, whispered a prayer for his safe return home. That struck her as slightly ironic, because she’d always been the one to fret over airline safety, worrying that his flight would go down and she would lose him. She was always on pins and needles when he traveled, particularly if it was a cross-country flight. How many times had she endured the anxiety of Michael being taken from her? How many times had she prayed? And now everything felt different. He would be the one left to deal with losing her.
Anna distracted herself by getting things ready for the Christmas dinner tomorrow. She lined up the dry ingredients for turkey dressing – all ready to go. She even made the Jell-O salad that her dad so loved but everyone else made jokes about. Then, with the kitchen prepped for tomorrow, she busied herself by bagging and boxing the Christmas presents she’d gotten for her family, pausing to examine her meticulously wrapped gifts, knowing full well that the pretty packages would simply be torn open, the paper and ribbons tossed aside. But she had enjoyed putting them together, carefully choosing the type of wrapping paper that suited each member of her family. In her mind, the gifts were perfect – inside and out. She just hoped her relatives would appreciate them.
Then she put on her parka and loaded everything into her car. It took several trips, and each time she went out, Huntley gave her that look – that “why can’t I go outside too?” look. “Later,” she told him. “I’m sure your papa will take you out.” This way she felt assured that, even if Michael got home in the nick of time, everything would be ready to go. The main thing was to get out of there before David and Ron came to pick up the car.
Finally, she put the finishing touches on the enormous fruit salad she was taking for tonight’s buffet and put together an attractive plate of homemade cookies to share with Dad and Donna. She’d already taken cookie plates to her neighbors, including Bernice across the street, reminding her that they expected her to join them for Christmas Day tomorrow. Bernice had promised to “be there with bells on.”
Michael made it home just in time to dump his bags, grab a shower, and make some quick phone calls, which she hoped were business related but couldn’t be certain, since she couldn’t hear him as he talked on his cell phone in the bathroom. Stop being so suspicious, she told herself as she fed Huntley and filled his water dish, promising him a walk tomorrow morning. Then she gave him a new rawhide bone. “Merry Christmas, old boy,” she said as she scratched him behind the ear.
“Ready to go?” Michael said.
“Yes, I already loaded everything in my car.”
“Such a smart woman.” Then he hugged and kissed her in such a way that she felt certain that her suspicions about another woman must be wrong. Either that or her husband deserved an Oscar for his performance.
She ha
nded him her car keys. “Want to drive?”
“Sure. That snow’s getting pretty messy in town. I actually slid coming off Arbor Drive. After that I slowed down.”
Anna glanced down their street as Michael pulled out. She wondered if David and Ron might be lurking around the corner just waiting for them to go. She also wondered how Michael would react when he found out that it was just a matter of days before his beloved MG was up and running. Suddenly the old excitement of pulling off a great Christmas grabbed her again. She felt like she was about six years old and waiting for Santa to arrive.
“This is so beautiful out here,” she gushed as he drove through their neighborhood. “I love snow.”
“I do too – at least I do right now. I wasn’t too crazy about it when I was stuck in Sea-Tac.”
“I guess it was a good thing I didn’t go with you after all. Hey, how did your presentation go?”
He grinned. “Pretty well, I think. We won’t know until after Christmas. But if we get this account, Anna . . . well, things are really going to change for us.”
She nodded. “That’s great.” Unfortunately the things that she expected to change wouldn’t be good things. But Anna didn’t want to think about that tonight. She wasn’t going to let anything ruin this Christmas.
–––––
“You’re here!” Donna said as Anna and Michael came into the house loaded down with packages.
“Not that it matters,” Celeste said. “Since everyone else isn’t.”
“Who’s not here?” Anna asked as she handed a bag to Donna and peeled off her coat.
“Your brother,” Celeste said. “He just dumped me and took off.”
Anna patted Celeste’s shoulder. “Sorry about that. But how are you doing? How’s baby?”
Celeste brightened. “I’m okay, considering. And I finally got some real maternity clothes.” She held out her hands to model a form-fitting pale pink maternity top, sticking out her tiny tummy. “See?”
The Joy of Christmas Page 27
