by Abby Green
What if they found something wrong?
When she was dressed in a gown and lying on a bed the doctor came in with Alix. He was chatty and warm, but Leila couldn’t help her nerves mounting as cold gel was spread on her belly.
She glanced at Alix, but he was looking intently at the monitor where the doctor was focusing his attention as he moved the ultrasound device over Leila’s belly.
She winced a little as he pressed in hard and almost reached for Alix’s hand—some reflexive part of her was craving his solid strength and support. Instead she curled her hands into fists and looked at the monitor too. Her mother had done this alone. And even though Leila’s baby’s father was beside her she might as well have been alone too, for all the emotional support he was offering.
Suddenly a rapid beat filled the room, and it took Leila a second to figure out that it was the baby’s heartbeat.
The doctor smiled. ‘He—or she—is strong, that’s for sure.’
A shape was appearing on the screen now, like a curled-over nut. The head was visible. And the spine. So delicate and fragile, yet there. Growing. Becoming someone. A son or a daughter.
Emotion suddenly erupted in Leila’s chest and she had to put a hand to her mouth to stop a sob escaping. The love she felt, along with a fierce protectiveness, made her dizzy. Up to now it had been largely an intellectual thing. But this was visceral and all-consuming. Primal.
The doctor was saying reassuringly, ‘Everything looks fine to me. We’ll have you back in another few weeks, to see how things are progressing, but for now just eat well, take some gentle exercise and get lots of sleep.’
Leila just nodded at the doctor, too emotional to speak. He patted her hand, as if he saw this every day—which he probably did.
When Leila felt a little more composed she looked at Alix. But even steeling herself didn’t prepare her for seeing the closed-off expression on his face. His eyes were unreadable. He certainly wasn’t feeling the same depth of emotion Leila was experiencing, and it was like a physical blow.
His gaze was still fixed on the screen, and then he seemed to come out of the trance he was in and he said curtly, ‘So everything is fine, then?’
‘Yes, yes...nothing to worry about.’
‘Good.’
He didn’t look at her. His jaw was hard, resolute. They’d established that the baby was well. That was all he cared about. Leila was far too emotional to deal with Alix’s smug satisfaction now, and she welcomed the distraction of the nurse coming to help her change back into her clothes.
The doctor and Alix left, and Leila did her best to ignore the ache in her throat and the hollow hole in her chest. She’d never really imagined what this experience would be like, but even if she had she would have expected the father of her child to be slightly more interested.
This had obviously just been a clinical experience, as far as Alix was concerned. And she was a fool to have had even the minutest impulse to seek anything from him.
That protectiveness that had assailed her moments ago surged back at the thought of Alix being so distant once the baby was born.
Once she emerged into the corridor her ire increased when she saw Alix pacing up and down, on his phone. As if they’d not just established that their baby was well. He saw her and gestured to say that they were leaving. She had to almost trot to keep up with his long-legged stride, and with each step she felt angrier and angrier and more hurt.
Alix terminated his phone call once they were in the Jeep and silence reigned. Leila was determined not to break it, feeling far too volatile and emotional. She knew Alix was sending her glances, but she resolutely ignored him, looking at the pretty scenery but not taking it in.
When they pulled up outside the castle she opened her door and got out before he could do it—or anyone else. She all but ran back into the huge stone fortress and blindly made her way down corridors, hoping she was headed in the right direction.
Everything was bubbling up—her hurt, her unwelcome desire for Alix and the need to get far away from the man who had turned her world upside down.
She heard steps behind her. ‘Leila, what the—? Stop!’
She did stop then, breathless and hopelessly lost. She turned to face Alix, who was glowering. Fresh anger bubbled up, and again that fierce protectiveness. She felt the walls of the massive building crowd in on her, squeezing her chest tight. But biggest of all was the hurt.
She put a hand on her belly. ‘You didn’t feel a thing in that scan room, did you? Except maybe a sense of satisfaction that your precious heir is fine.’
Alix looked at Leila. She’d never been more beautiful. Her cheeks were flushed with colour, eyes sparkling with anger. And with something else that he didn’t want to identify.
He saw movement in his peripheral vision and, aware of staff nearby, strode forward, taking Leila’s arm in his hand. ‘Not here.’
He looked around and saw a doorway, recognised what it was. He opened it and brought a resisting Leila in, shutting the door behind him.
She ripped her arm free of his hand and moved away, looking around, her cheeks flushing even more and her eyes going wide as she took in the lavish surroundings.
‘What is this place?’
Leila’s voice was shaky and Alix hated the fact that it twisted his guts. He strode forward into the room. It was an opulent stone chamber with a raised marble platform. Alcoves around the edges of the room held sinks and drains. The ceiling was domed, and inlaid with thousands of mosaic mother-of-pearl stars that glittered.
‘It was the women’s hammam. And the harem is in this section of the palace too.’
Leila sent him an incredulous look. ‘A harem? I thought we were still in the civilised west—not some medieval desert kingdom.’
Alix pushed down his irritation. ‘The harem hasn’t been in regular use for some time.’
Leila let out a laugh. ‘Wow, that’s reassuring. But maybe you’re contemplating starting it up again? Taking additional wives just to fulfil your royal quota of children?’
Alix’s jaw was so tight it ached, and yet he couldn’t stop a series of images forming of Leila being stripped, massaged, washed and dressed by an army of women. And of him coming here to these secret and sensual rooms to find her waiting for him. Supplicant.
He wanted her so badly right then that he shook with it. He curled his hands into fists and said, ‘Want to discuss what that was all about?’ He couldn’t even articulate himself properly. This woman tied him into knots.
She folded her arms over her breasts and it only served to remind Alix that he kept noticing how much fuller they were. The wrap dress she wore accentuated every womanly curve. He’d found it near impossible not to look at her bared belly in that room in the hospital, his control feeling far too flimsy.
‘I’m talking about the fact that you might as well have been looking at a weather report in the hospital... Did seeing our baby on that screen affect you at all?’
CHAPTER TEN
ALIX LOOKED AT HER. Did seeing our baby on that screen affect you at all? His mind reeled. It had affected him so much he’d almost doubled over from the rush of pride, mixed with love and an awful bone-numbing sense of terror. Terror that something would happen to that fragile life that wasn’t even born yet. Terror that something would happen to Leila. Terror at the surge of an emotion he’d never expected to feel again.
Leila didn’t wait for him to speak. ‘You were so cold...impervious. I will not bring a baby into a marriage where there is nothing between us except a sense of responsibility and duty. It’s obvious you feel nothing for this baby beyond valuing it for the fact that it will inherit—’
Alix put up a hand, stopping her. Her words scored at his insides and yet he couldn’t let it out—it was too much. And all he could see was her. So beautiful, so vital, and here. In front of him. Pushing his buttons.
Suddenly Alix wanted all the turmoil he felt to be consumed by fire. He moved closer to her and w
as gratified to see the pulse grow hectic at the base of her neck. Her breasts swelled with her breath.
‘You say there’s nothing between us?’
She nodded her head jerkily. Not so sure of herself now. ‘There isn’t. You only pursued me to distract people from your plans. You used me. You don’t want me—you just want a vessel for your heirs. And it’s not enough—for me or the baby.’
Alix was so close to Leila now he could smell her scent. Her unique brand of musk and sweetness.
‘You’re wrong, you know.’
Something flared in her eyes—something that once again he didn’t want to identify.
‘How?’ she asked defiantly.
Alix reached out and took a lock of long, dark, glossy hair, winding it around his finger, tugging her gently towards him. She resisted.
‘There is something between us and it’s enough to bind us together for ever.’
He saw Leila swallow. He tugged her hair again and she jerked forward slightly, almost against her will.
‘You see, I do want you. I wanted you the moment I saw you. I have ached with wanting you for the past seven weeks. And I am afraid that I will never stop wanting you, no matter how much I have of you—damn you.’
And with that Alix’s control snapped and he hauled Leila into his arms, driving his mouth down onto hers, crushing her soft abundant curves to his body that was aching with need to be embedded in her tight, hot warmth.
Leila’s brain fused with white-hot heat and lust. For long seconds she felt only intense relief as Alix’s mouth crushed hers and he finally relaxed enough to allow the kiss to deepen and become a real kiss.
Then Leila’s brain finally cleared enough to recall his words: I have ached with wanting you. Just like her. And now that ache was finally being assuaged.
Alix’s big hands were roving over her back and waist, finding her hips, squeezing. Cupping her bottom, lifting her against him so that the hard ridge of his erection slid against her...just there.
She moaned into his mouth, rubbing herself against him, wanting more. She was incoherent with lust. Warning bells telling her to stop and think about what they’d just been saying to each other were being drowned out, and Leila knew that she was complicit in this.
She also knew that she was proving some point for Alix—and it wasn’t necessarily a point she wanted to prove. But it was too late. She needed him too badly. She needed this. Physicality. No words or confusing emotions or hurt. Just the satisfaction of needs being met. Transcending everything.
Alix broke the kiss and drew back. He yanked aside the material of her dress to expose her breast, encased in lace.
Leila bit her lip to stop herself from begging. She was only still upright because one of Alix’s arms was around her. Her legs were like jelly. And now he was pulling down the lace cup of her bra, freeing her breast and thumbing her nipple, then squeezing it gently.
She was so sensitive there that she almost screamed, circling her hips against Alix, utterly wanton.
He looked at her, his eyes flaming dark silver with need. A need that resonated within her too.
In a swift move he lifted her into his arms before she knew what was happening. Her shoes fell off as Alix strode out of the main hammam room and deeper into the harem. It was dark and shadowy. Mysterious. Rooms led off the corridor all in different colours.
He shouldered open one door and Leila’s eyes went huge when she took in an enormous circular bed, dressed in blood-red silks and satins. The walls were covered with murals and it took a second for it to sink in that the murals depicted Kama Sutra–like explicit drawings.
A courtyard filled with wild blooming flowers was visible through French doors and a brightly coloured bird flew away from a water fountain. It was as if this was some kind of fairy tale and these rooms had been suspended in time all these years.
And then Alix laid Leila down on the bed and she knew this was no fairy tale. He was too intent...serious. Focused. And she knew she should care...should be getting up, walking away...but she couldn’t move. And, worse, she didn’t want to.
If this was all they had then she wanted it as fiercely as he did. Somehow, here, with Alix stripping off his outer urban layer, Leila could pretend that nothing else existed. For a moment.
When Alix was naked he lowered himself over Leila on his arms and dropped his head, his mouth feathering hot kisses along her jaw and neck down to where her pulse beat like a drum, sucking her there and biting gently. As if he wanted to leave his mark on her.
She reached for him, groaning with deep feminine satisfaction when she found his hard muscles, the defined ridges of his abdomen. And she reached down further, to where his erection jutted proudly from his body. Hot and hard. Silk over steel.
She wrapped a hand around him, suddenly more confident than she’d ever been before. She stroked him, loving how the muscles in his belly tightened at her touch.
Then he put a hand over hers and drew it away. ‘I’ll explode if you keep touching me like that. I need you—now.’
Suddenly Leila was frantic with the same urgency, and aware that she was still fully dressed—albeit with her dress gaping open and her bra pulled down.
Alix undid the tie of her dress and Leila wriggled out of it. Her bra was dispensed with and Alix pulled her panties and tights down and off.
He stood back for a moment and just looked at her. Waves of heat made her blood throb and her skin feel tight. And then he came over her again, nudging her legs apart. He lavished attention on her breasts, sucking her nipples into his mouth and making them wet and tight with need. Then he trailed his mouth and tongue down over her belly, where their baby was nestled in her womb.
He seemed to linger there for a second, and Leila felt a rush of emotion, but she bit her lip to stop it coming out, afraid of what she’d say. And then she couldn’t think, because Alix’s mouth was moving lower, and so was he, hitching her legs over his shoulders and gripping her buttocks as he put his mouth on her there.
At the hot, wet seam of her body where she couldn’t hide how much she wanted him.
She felt utterly exposed, but couldn’t stop him as he stroked her with his tongue, opening her up to his ministrations, and then he found that cluster of cells and licked and sucked until she was gripping his hair and bucking towards his mouth, and his tongue was thrusting deep inside her.
And even though she’d climaxed, right into his mouth, it wasn’t enough. She was panting, almost sobbing as he rose up like some kind of god. Her legs flopped wide and Alix moved his erection against her. After an enigmatic second of silent communication he thrust deep into her core. And her world shattered into pieces for a second time.
She became pure sensuality—engulfed in a never-ending moment of bliss. Alix moved within her, deeper and harder with each thrust. She was boneless, and yet she couldn’t help the rising tide of another climax. Even after the last two.
She caught a glimpse of something above them and looked up. The ceiling was mirrored glass. Old and dark. But she could see Alix’s sculpted and muscular buttocks moving in and out of her body, her legs wrapped around him, ankles crossed over the small of his back.
And it was as she saw his huge, powerful body flexing into hers with such beauty and strength that she fell apart for the third time, her orgasm so intense that she barely felt the rush of Alix’s hot release, deep in her body, as he jerked spasmodically with the after-effects of his own climax.
* * *
When Leila woke she was completely disorientated. She was alone on the huge circular bed and the covers were pulled up over her chest. She could see herself reflected in the ceiling and her hair was spread around her head. Images came back... The sheer carnality of their union. The humiliating speed with which she’d capitulated.
‘You’re awake.’
Leila tensed and lifted her head. Alix stood by the open French doors of the room. It was dusk outside and birds called. The scent of the flowers was heady. Leila ha
d to block out the immediate instinct she had to assimilate the smells.
She pushed herself up on her elbows, noting that Alix was in his trousers, but still bare-chested. ‘Yes, I’m awake.’
She felt as if she’d been turned inside out. She tried to claw back her sense of anger from earlier, but it was hard when she felt as if someone had drained every bone from her body and injected her with some kind of pleasure serum.
She saw her dress at the end of the bed and sat up, holding the sheet to her as she reached for it. She put it on awkwardly, aware of Alix’s intense regard, and tied it around her, sitting on the edge of the bed.
‘You asked me earlier if it affected me, seeing the baby today?’
Leila went still and nodded.
‘Of course it affected me. What kind of man would I be if I couldn’t see my own child and feel something?’
Leila stood up, hoping her legs wouldn’t fail her. She needed to move away from the bed—the scene of where she’d lost control so spectacularly. She saw a chair nearby and sank onto the edge.
‘Why didn’t you say something?’
Alix was terse, tense. ‘Because I couldn’t. It was too much all at once.’
Leila felt a very fragile flame of hope light within her. ‘That’s how I felt too. But when I looked at you, you were so closed off—as if you were just checking something off a list. I’m afraid that you won’t love this baby. That it’ll just be a means to an end for you.’
Like this marriage.
Alix looked as if he’d prefer to eat nails than pursue this conversation, but eventually he said, ‘I should tell you about my brother.’
Leila frowned. ‘You told me he was killed—with your parents.’
Alix nodded. ‘Max was handicapped. A lack of oxygen to the brain when he was born prematurely. He wasn’t severely disabled, just enough not to be able to keep up with kids his age. I was five when he was born. He spent a lot of time in hospital at first, in an incubator. My parents weren’t interested, so I spent most of my time with him.’
