‘‘I’d like to think that. He’s certainly given me a gift. He says I look good twenty pounds overweight. True, he compares me to a pillow, but his heart’s in the right place.’’
Gwen rolled her eyes. ‘‘You can teach a geek magic tricks, but you can’t turn him into a silver-tongued devil overnight. He once told me my nose was nicely proportioned and my nostrils were the perfect size.’’
‘‘Omigod.’’
‘‘That’s Jeremy. But a guy who likes you the way you are is sure good for the ego.’’
‘‘Mine needed some serious plumping up, no pun intended.’’
‘‘Then I say let him plump. It seems as if he’s good at it.’’
‘‘He is.’’ Annie gazed at her. ‘‘Are you sure you aren’t secretly in love with him? Because if I thought so, I would back away right this minute.’’
‘‘I’m not secretly in love with him. He’s like the brother I never had. I watched you two dancing and that was the sexiest I’ve ever seen him, but I still didn’t get a tingle.’’ Gwen smiled. ‘‘But you did.’’
‘‘Uh-huh. Can’t explain why, but he really does it for me.’’
‘‘Then you should let him keep doing it, at least through Sunday. You’re having a positive effect on him, too. He’s like me, way too conservative. You’re expanding his horizons.’’ Gwen ticked off items on her fingers. ‘‘Sex outside by the lake, sex in the afternoon, sex in the backseat during a party—’’
‘‘That’s a pretty comprehensive list. Is someone following us?’’ Maybe Jeremy was right and the lake monster was only a practical joke.
‘‘Not that I know of. We just have superior intelligence gathering in this town. You lived here for eighteen years. You must remember that.’’
Annie lowered her voice. ‘‘Speaking of intelligence gathering, I’m going to tell you something and you have to promise to keep it to yourself.’’
‘‘If Jeremy’s really nine inches, I don’t want to know.’’
‘‘This has nothing to do with Jeremy.’’
‘‘So he is nine inches?’’
‘‘No.’’
‘‘Eight?’’
‘‘Focus, Gwen.’’ For the first time Annie took note of how flushed Gwen was. ‘‘How many cups of punch did you have, anyway?’’
‘‘A few. I’ve never been great with parties, but it helps to get a little looped.’’
‘‘In other words, I might as well disregard all that good advice you gave me because you’re smashed.’’
‘‘No, actually, you should listen to the advice I just gave you, because the booze helps me tap into my inner wisdom.’’
Annie sighed. ‘‘And besides that, you have a great nose.’’
‘‘Nice of you to notice. What’s this top secret thing you want to tell me about?’’
‘‘I saw something in Deep Lake last night. Something huge.’’
‘‘Are we back to the subject of Jeremy’s penis?’’
‘‘No.’’ Annie edged Gwen away from the crowd. ‘‘And keep your voice down. I’m talking about a creature sort of like the Loch Ness monster, only with a smaller head. Looks kind of like a plesiosaur, if you remember your dinosaurs.’’
‘‘I’ll be damned. Maybe Donald wasn’t exaggerating. ’’
‘‘Donald Jenkins?’’
Gwen nodded. ‘‘He claimed to see something big under the surface while he was out fishing last weekend, but you know how he exaggerates. Nobody believed him.’’
A chill shot up Annie’s spine. She knew Donald, who ran the Big Knob Dairy, and he did tend to exaggerate. But now three people had seen a monster. They couldn’t all be imagining things.
Gwen gazed at her with benign tolerance. ‘‘You know it has to be kids, Annie. Don’t be gullible. There’s no such thing as lake monsters.’’
‘‘If it’s kids, they’re a lot more clever than we were.’’
‘‘Oh, they are. I wouldn’t put anything past the new crop. Teenagers get crazy in the spring. Remember how we were?’’
‘‘You were never crazy, Gwen.’’
‘‘Sadly, that’s true. I’ve been thinking that needs to change.’’ With a lopsided grin, Gwen tucked her arm through Annie’s. ‘‘Let’s go get some food.’’
‘‘I’m not eating. If my mother has to let my dress out any more, she’ll have to add that extra piece of material we learned about in sewing class. I think it’s a gussy.’’
‘‘It’s a gusset, and one baby éclair won’t mean you need a gusset.’’ Gwen pulled her closer to the crystal plate holding the éclairs. ‘‘Have you ever thought about how much these are like penises? Or is it penisi?’’
‘‘Gwen, you really are toasted. Plus you’re fixated on male equipment.’’ Annie laughed. ‘‘But I can see what you mean, with the shape and the cream filling inside.’’
Gwen handed her one. ‘‘I dare you to take this over to Jeremy, nip the end off and suck the cream out right in front of him. I double-dog dare you.’’
‘‘And I thought you were a sweet girl.’’
‘‘I am sweet, and getting sick of it. Try the éclair trick. I’ve always wanted to but never had the nerve. A big one would be more effective, but you have to work with what you have.’’
‘‘Why should I?’’
‘‘Because I know Jeremy. We’re way too much alike, which is why we’re so wrong for each other. He’ll be embarrassed and hate it, but he’ll love it, too. Trust me, he wants to break out of his ordinary routine and do impulsive things. There’s a wild man inside there and you can help turn him loose.’’
The concept appealed to Annie. If she thought she was actually benefiting Jeremy this week, that would relieve her guilt about leaving on Sunday. ‘‘I’ll try it, but Gwen, you need a hot guy so you can unleash your inner vixen. If you’ll come to Chicago, I’ll hook you up.’’
Gwen shook her head. ‘‘I think I need a Frenchman. ’’
‘‘I know some guys with French names.’’ Annie could think of two in the newsroom.
‘‘No, I mean from France.’’
That’s when Annie remembered that going to France had always been Gwen’s dream. ‘‘Can you leave the flower shop and just go?’’
‘‘Not really.’’
‘‘Then how—’’
‘‘The Internet. I’ll find someone and invite him here to visit.’’
Annie looked at her friend with new respect. Gwen had a plan and a goal. If anyone could pull that sort of thing off, it would be her. ‘‘Good luck with that. Oh, and about Jeremy, will you keep an eye on him and make sure he’s okay after I leave?’’
‘‘You bet.’’
‘‘Especially watch out for Isabel.’’
Gwen saluted. ‘‘I promise she won’t get by me, coach. Now, go suck that éclair.’’
Jeremy had hoped Annie would decide to eat something. When she wandered over with the éclair in her hand, he concluded that his bumbling attempts to tell her she wasn’t fat had worked.
‘‘I’m glad you changed your mind.’’ He gestured to the full plate he held in one hand. ‘‘As you can see, I went a little overboard.’’
‘‘Overboard is good.’’ Holding his gaze, she bit off the very tip of the éclair.
‘‘I’ll bet those taste great.’’ He didn’t know why he should be nervous. She was only eating an éclair.
‘‘Mm.’’ Then she began to lick the end of the damned thing, and he knew why he should be nervous. ‘‘That’s very cute, Annie.’’ He was getting hard, which wasn’t cute at all. The word painful came to mind.
After she’d licked all the chocolate off, she put the end of the small éclair in her mouth and began to suck.
He should turn around and leave. That’s exactly what he should do. If he stayed here and watched her perform oral sex on that éclair, he would end up in big trouble.
The party ebbed and flowed around them, but nobody stopped to comment on what Anni
e was doing. He could walk away and leave her sucking her éclair by herself. But his feet wouldn’t go anywhere.
‘‘Okay, Annie, that’s enough.’’ His voice sounded as if he might be coming down with a cold. ‘‘You made your point.’’
She finished sucking the cream filling from the éclair, and there was a little bit of it left in the corner of her mouth. She slowly licked it away.
He didn’t even realize he’d tilted his plate until the entire contents tumbled in a soggy mess onto the hardwood floor. The fork landed last with a soft clunk.
Annie glanced at the floor with a little smile of triumph. ‘‘Whoops.’’
That’s when Jeremy knew for sure that she’d meant to make him lose his cool. Little Annie wasn’t quite as sweet as she seemed, and she was way sexier than he’d imagined.
She also had a devilish streak, and she’d pay for it in ways that would bring them both some extra excitement tomorrow night. He had some planning to do before they went to the lake to look for the supposed lake monster. In the meantime, though, he had a mess to clean up.
Would the magic word work in a case like this? Now that everyone at the party had noticed the food dumped at his feet, it might be a good time to find out if the word was truly multipurpose. If so, he could use it as part of Annie’s payback tomorrow night.
He glanced over at Ambrose and lifted his eyebrows. Ambrose gave a slight tilt of his head, which Jeremy took as a go-ahead sign. Concentrating all his attention on the food, he held his plate perfectly level. ‘‘Abracadabra.’’
The food disappeared from the floor, leaving no trace, and reappeared on his plate. The fork followed. As everyone cheered and clapped, he took a little bow, being careful not to spill the food again. No point in pushing his luck.
‘‘Nice work,’’ Annie said with a broad smile of approval.
‘‘Glad you liked it.’’
‘‘I have no idea how you did that,’’ she said. ‘‘It was seamless.’’
‘‘Professional secret.’’ So secret that he didn’t have a clue what had just happened. He wondered if he dared eat the food. After all, it had been on the floor. Then again, it had been put through some kind of magic transformation. He took a forkful of potato salad. ‘‘Want some?’’
‘‘Okay.’’
He fed her the bite of potato salad and she played it for all it was worth, closing those perfect lips around the fork and easing the salad off the fork in a long, sensuous motion. His penis twitched in response, but he was still in control. Accomplishing the magic trick had put him back in the driver’s seat.
‘‘Hey, Jeremy,’’ Bruce said. ‘‘You’ve got her eating out of your hand.’’
‘‘Brucey, baby, why don’t you ever feed me like that?’’ Melody asked.
‘‘I will,’’ Bruce said, ‘‘once you learn to eat an éclair.’’
That’s when Jeremy knew that everyone in the room had viewed the whole performance even though they hadn’t seemed to be watching. Annie definitely had something to answer for.
He glanced at her and spoke in a low voice no one else would be able to hear. ‘‘You know those rules you set up for tomorrow night at the lake?’’
‘‘Uh-huh.’’
‘‘They’ve been officially canceled.’’
As he watched the anticipation build in her eyes, he began to think he might have the combination that would convince her to stay in Big Knob. She needed excitement. He’d see what he could do about that.
Chapter 16
Dorcas slipped out of bed early the next morning. Ambrose was still asleep and probably would be for at least another hour. He’d felt frisky after the party the night before and they’d had quite a time on the fold-down sex bench in their bedroom. The bench was Ambrose’s invention, a sturdy alternative to chair sex.
Sean Madigan had built it for them last winter, and now they no longer destroyed wooden chairs with their enthusiastic lovemaking. Even better, the bench folded up against the wall when not in use. That was a good thing, because otherwise Ambrose would turn it into a clothes rack and it would lose its charm in a hurry.
After a night of partying and sex, Ambrose always slept in. That suited Dorcas’s plans perfectly. Eventually Dee-Dee would have to get used to dealing with men, but for now she seemed comfortable talking only to women.
Dorcas dressed in a purple warm-up suit and running shoes while Sabrina pranced around her purring in anticipation. On the way downstairs, Dorcas thought about what she wanted to say to the lake monster. She’d heard that the owner of the Big Knob Dairy had claimed to have seen Dee-Dee, but fortunately nobody believed him. Still, caution was important right now.
Sabrina streaked out the back door when Dorcas opened it, but waited at the bottom of the steps. Dorcas glanced out to the lake but couldn’t see much because of the pearl-colored mist rising from the surface. The air smelled of damp pine, and the rubber soles of her shoes squeaked on the dew-soaked wood as she descended to the path that led to the lake.
All this moisture was good for her complexion. That was one thing she worried about in Sedona. She’d had to counteract the effects of the dry air with a special antiaging potion, but she hadn’t bothered with it here.
The sun hadn’t yet topped the hills to the east of town. When it did, the mist would disappear, but for now it softened the landscape, as if some giant hand had adjusted a lens and everything was slightly out of focus. The ethereal atmosphere suited Dorcas just fine.
Sedona almost never had mist. The seasons weren’t as pronounced there, either, which wasn’t a huge deal, but Dorcas had somewhat enjoyed watching a snowy winter morph into a green spring. This summer she’d try swimming in the lake, and perhaps talk Ambrose into skinny-dipping with her.
Sabrina seemed to like it here, too. This morning she bounded from one side of the path to the other, obviously hoping to flush a grasshopper or a chipmunk. Dorcas would never have been able to allow this kind of freedom in Sedona, where coyotes would make a meal of her in no time. Being a magical cat, Sabrina might be able to hold her own, but Dorcas hadn’t wanted to take the chance.
She grudgingly admitted that Big Knob had its advantages, and the area around Deep Lake was beautiful, almost as beautiful, in its own way, as the red rocks of Sedona. But she wasn’t becoming attached to the place, by any means. She might come back and visit once in a while after they left, though.
As she neared the lake, she heard waves lapping against the small beach. There was no wind, so the waves had to be caused by Dee-Dee swimming around. She might as well do it now while the mist hid her from prying eyes.
Dorcas put her hands to her mouth and was about to call for the lake monster to approach, when a familiar laugh drifted across the water. A moment later Dorcas made out the ghostly shape of Dee-Dee swimming toward her, with a familiar long-legged figure clinging to her neck. Isadora had gone for a ride.
‘‘Hi-ho, Dee-Dee, awayyyy!’’ Isadora called out and waved at Dorcas. Then she leaned to her left, and Dee-Dee veered to that side and plunged toward the center of the lake. Waves splashed higher on the beach and sprayed both Dorcas and Sabrina.
Sabrina scampered back with a hiss of distaste. She obviously loved riding perched on Dee-Dee’s head, but she always managed to avoid getting wet. She glanced up at Dorcas with a meow of protest. She didn’t seem to like sharing her newfound friend.
‘‘I’m not crazy about this, either,’’ Dorcas said. ‘‘She could attract unwanted attention with a stunt like that.’’ Dorcas also recognized another emotion digging at her. She was jealous.
She would have loved to take a ride, but she hadn’t thought it wise. Instead she’d let Sabrina go while she stood guard on shore in case anyone happened along. Isadora hadn’t worried about such things.
With another whoop of joy, Isadora reappeared through the mist, still holding tight to Dee-Dee’s neck. She gave a little squeeze and Dee-Dee floated in place about ten feet off shore. ‘‘Come on, Dorcas!�
�’ Isadora called. ‘‘Ride with me.’’
‘‘I think you should get off.’’ Dorcas heard how prissy that sounded. She was not prissy, or at least she hadn’t been until Isadora showed up.
‘‘Not yet.’’ Isadora was breathing hard. ‘‘I’d forgotten how fun this is. You should try it.’’
Dee-Dee, being shy, said nothing. Dorcas could imagine that Isadora made Dee-Dee even more shy than usual. The possibility of a good conversation dwindled, but there was the prospect of a ride . . .
As Dorcas debated whether she dared join Isadora, Sabrina meowed again and kneaded her paws into the sand as she stared intently at Dee-Dee. Sabrina wanted her ride. And so did Dorcas.
‘‘All right,’’ she said. ‘‘Once around the lake.’’
‘‘Hooray!’’ Isadora leaned forward. ‘‘Move up a little more, Dee-Dee, and lower your head like you did for me.’’
‘‘I knew that,’’ Dee-Dee said in her surprisingly melodious voice. ‘‘I learned to do it for Sabrina.’’
‘‘Who?’’
‘‘My cat.’’ Dorcas pulled off her shoes and socks and waded into the cold water so she could sling a leg over Dee-Dee’s neck. ‘‘Dee-Dee’s been giving her rides for days. It was Dee-Dee’s idea, in fact.’’ After a small trial run, Sabrina had been more than ready to go every morning.
‘‘And you never tried it?’’ Isadora asked. ‘‘Why the hell not?’’
‘‘I thought someone should keep watch. I’ve been very worried that someone would see her.’’ The lake monster’s skin felt like wet vinyl, and Dorcas had to be careful she didn’t slip right off as she worked herself backward.
‘‘Someone has. Taking those petitions around has netted me a ton of gossip. The dairy guy thinks he saw her.’’
‘‘I know about that.’’ Dorcas was glad she was able to say so. ‘‘Nobody believes him, though.’’ Dorcas intended to keep her information about Annie and her experience with Dee-Dee private for now.
‘‘They don’t believe him yet, but that could change,’’ Isadora said. ‘‘Okay, keep inching down. I’ll move back a little to make room. We should both fit right at the base of her neck.’’
Wild & Hexy Page 17
