She’d never really thought about it like that before. “I guess not,” she mumbled.
“Exactly,” Todd said. “You’d have gone on to decide what kind of life you wanted, not just taken the easiest way. Your mother was feisty and determined, I can’t imagine you have any less of those qualities.”
“I can barely remember her,” Krista replied.
“Those traits have nothing to do with memories. You’ll get past this feeling for him—them. I’ve seen other girls deal with guilt and false love too. You need to find your anger and hold it tightly. Don’t forget what they’ve done to you and made you endure. I’m grateful they didn’t beat you, but as far as I’m concerned the bastards are monsters.”
“They didn’t have a choice. It’s not as if they had a way to go out and meet women. If they wanted a woman in their life, they had to sign up for the lottery.” Her voice rose as she defended them. Her father kept his eyes on the road, but she noticed he held the steering wheel in a white-knuckled grip.
“It’s the damn government that’s to blame ultimately, but if the men— the rich, healthy men that Uncle Sam wants—grew a spine and started to refuse the lottery, there’d be some real and positive changes for women in America.”
“I can’t blame them,” Krista whispered.
“I have to have someone to blame for all the years I’ve missed, muffin. They are the face of my anger, the flesh and blood for me to hate, don’t be sad. I know a wonderful physiologist who’s helped other girls with Stockholm Syndrome, and he’ll help you too. Everything will be better once we get you across the border.”
Krista frowned. She didn’t like her father acting as if he knew her better than she knew herself. The man hadn’t seen her since she was a toddler for goodness sake! “So what makes this place in Winnipeg ‘female-friendly’?”
Mara reached over and squeezed Krista’s hand. “Listen, I know you think those men had your best interests in mind, but even they don’t have the final say in your fate. You know that, right?”
Krista shrugged. She did, but this wasn’t any of their faults. She could’ve had it worse. “I get it, but you didn’t answer my question.”
“In Canada, women are allowed to choose, and communities that want their females to stick around work hard to keep it safe. No one comes in or out of our gated sanctuaries without identification and a reason. Men work very hard to protect their wives, and marriage is still a beloved institution. Life can almost be—normal. Women can work, but most aren’t willing to risk it. I won’t lie, there are abductions and rapes, but at least you get to live as you please.”
Krista could accept the risks; she knew there were plenty of them in America too. She hated leaving, but staying was just too unpredictable. A tear trickled down her face. “I love Braxton.”
Her father glanced up at her in the rearview mirror. “I’m sorry,” he said quietly.
“Me too,” she muttered. “I’m grateful, really I am. I know you’re all risking your lives for me. Every state has instituted the death penalty for what you’re doing for me, even Minnesota.”
“I sat in my cell, watching democracy die with a whimper instead of a bang. This country represented freedom for hundreds of years, and here we are now, escaping tyranny. I’m sorry you can’t have the man you love, but you will find someone to care about again.”
His statement piqued her curiosity. “Did you remarry?”
“Yes, you’re sitting next to her,” he said, chuckling.
Krista glanced sharply at Mara. The woman wasn’t much older than she was. “Huh, are you going to be an evil step-mother like in the fairy tales?” Krista teased.
Mara rolled her eyes and shook her head. “I’ve never been a step-mother so I have no idea, but the idea I’m a step-grandmother is really freaking me out.”
A bubble of laughter rolled out of Krista. It felt good to laugh. She hadn’t done it in far too long. “I guess we all get to feel freaky. Belated congratulations to you both. How long have you been married?”
“Three years last week. I’m a lucky man.” He glanced up at Mara in the mirror this time, grinning.
“You’ll be safe with us, Krista, I promise. We’ll protect you both. May I?” Mara moved to put her hand on Krista’s belly. Krista nodded and Mara rested her hand on the baby bump. A moment of feminine camaraderie passed between them, and Krista realized how much she’d missed having a woman in her life.
“Do you think I’ll be able to find my friend Cina? She fled to Canada months ago.”
“We’ll do our best to help you reconnect,” Mara replied.
For the first time since the ordeal in the hospital began, Krista let herself feel true hope. Her heart filled and she bit her lip to keep her tears at bay. Mara put her arm around her, and gave her a quick hug. “You aren’t alone, Krista.”
Those words were the most perfect ones she could ask for. “Thank you,” she whispered.
“Aww, you don’t have to thank me, it’s what evil step-mothers do.”
Krista giggled until she snorted. She covered her mouth. Her father and Mara exchange amused looks in the mirror.
“You people are making me sick with all this lovey-dovey family reunion stuff, but for Todd I’ll deal,” Jonathan said. Krista could see he was teasing from his expression, but his voice was serious.
“Thanks for helping me, Jonathan. What made you come with them?” She was genuinely intrigued. He didn’t seem to be the self-sacrificing type.
“Your dad saved my daughter from a man who was trying to rape her. We’ve been buddies ever since. I tell you, this guy is one-of-a-kind. I never thought I’d trust an ex-con, but hell, your dad is more of a man than most.”
His words renewed her interest in her dad’s past again. “We have time now. Tell me your story, Todd…ahh…Dad.”
He looked at her in the mirror again. She noticed sadness in his eyes. Guilt made her look away. “Don’t worry about it, muffin,” he said, as if he could read her mind. “This whole father-daughter bonding stuff will feel right eventually.” He paused and took a deep breath. He wasn’t looking at her in the mirror anymore. “We were young, your mother and I. Money was tight. You came along and it got tighter, then I lost my job. I panicked and a friend of mine talked me into making the biggest mistake of my life. I never should have participated in that robbery. I wasn’t there for your mother when you two needed me. I sat in the jail cell with another two years on my sentence worrying after news of what was happening outside got out. Everything was a mess, my lawyer was a woman and she died too. I ended up spending an extra eighteen months in there because of the chaos. When I got out, you’d have been six. I immediately tried to find out what happened to you and your mother. I had nothing. I stood next to a mass grave a broken man.”
“Where am I from?” Krista asked, looking at him again.
His eyes widened. “You don’t remember?”
“No, and they never told me. I guess they didn’t want me to have any ties to family or my past. Jared tried to help me by searching old records, but they sealed everything about me up tight. I couldn’t even access my own birth certificate.”
“Bastards.” Todd growled. He huffed out an exacerbated sigh. “I’m so sorry, muffin. Your mom and I were living in the Wisconsin Dells area when you were born. We spent a lot of time on the river. Those were some of the happiest days of my life. When we get home, remind me to show you the few pictures I have. There’s a great one of you on a little ride at one of the amusement parks. Your mom and I took you there a month before I lost my job. It was our last family outing.”
“I’d love that. I had a scrapbook from my days at the protection facility. I wish I could’ve brought it with me. I’d love to have shown you the book.”
“Ask Mara about my fixation with cameras. We’ll never miss another memory.”
Mara slapped her thigh. “Heaven help us! He’s terrible, everything is photographed. I swear I can’t do the dishes without him takin
g my picture. And he never gets my good side.”
“All your sides are your good side,” Todd said, and Krista could see he meant it. She was glad her father had found someone to love again. She knew how he felt. She wished she had a picture of Brax, anything to hold on to her memories.
Krista turned and gave Mara a quick tight hug. She squeaked with surprise. “Thank you,” she whispered in the other woman’s ear. They both burst into tears. She saw Jonathan and her father exchange horrified looks, Mara noticed too and they pulled away, trying to compose themselves.
“These rescues are always emotional, but this is just ridiculous,” Jonathan grumbled.
“Music. That’ll fix this road trip,” Todd announced, and he flipped on the radio. Oldies rock from the 1990s blared, and they all sang along to Nirvana. Krista loved classic rock, they just didn’t make music like that anymore.
Before long, her father pulled the SUV over. There was a car parked on the road. Krista got out when directed, but she was confused. An elderly man waited. He shook her father’s hand enthusiastically. “Thanks, Stan,” Todd said as he exchanged keys with the stranger.
“You know you never have to thank me for this. I’m glad you found her.” replied the man named Stan. He gave Krista a strange look. “You have your mother’s eyes.”
“You knew my mother?” she asked.
The man looked at Todd, raising his eyebrow. Then he turned back to look at Krista. “I knew her since the day she was born. I’m your grandfather, Kristannie.”
She’d never imagined having a grandfather.
“I’ll come up north to see you, once everything is settled. I’m glad your daddy kept his promise to me.” She saw the man wipe his eye before rushing away toward the SUV without another word or another look.
They piled into the small sedan; Krista sat in the back seat. She watched the SUV pulling away. “Why don’t I remember him?” she asked Todd.
“He didn’t like me much when I married your mother. Our love caused a major strain between them. He was right, I wasn’t good enough for her,” her father said gruffly. He looked away. Mara made a disgruntled noise, but said nothing. “They weren’t speaking when she died. I found him after I got out. I expected you to be with your grandparents. They didn’t know your mother had died. Your grandmother died shortly after your mother did, and with all the tragedy, he never thought about the little girl he’d never met. When he realized you’d survived, he tried to get you back, but the protection facility had you and he was as shut out as I was.” Todd pulled the car onto the shoulder of the road. “He regretted that your mother died alone and that you were lost. He’s the one who helped me get on my feet, and when I found this underground network of like-minded people, he supported my choice to work against the government. We’ve developed an understanding over the years.”
She’d spent so many years feeling alone. The revelation she had people who loved her and missed her felt strange. She didn’t know how to feel about all this new family. “I feel better than I did in the hospital, but I’m worried about my baby. How long will it be until we reach Winnipeg?” she asked her father when he glanced up to look at her.
“About another hour. I wouldn’t be surprised to learn that the doctor was causing your issues so they’d have a reason to change your placement. It’s well known, to most folks at least, that they use this tactic to avoid couple bonds forming. Your doctor may have noticed you had special feelings for your Braxton.”
Hearing his name sent a shaft of pain through her heart. The idea that the doctor may have done something to cause her so much anxiety filled her with white-hot rage.
They hadn’t seen any police, and she was both relieved and worried. Everything seemed too easy. They remained silent. The radio played, but much of the joviality had dissipated.
Suddenly, Krista heard sirens. She unhooked the seatbelt and slid down to the car’s carpeted floorboards. Mara pulled her baseball cap lower and touched the fake mustache, adjusting it quickly. Her father pulled over and the police car sped past. Everyone let out audible sighs of relief.
“We’ll be going through a few towns soon. I hate to do this, but I think you’ll need to ride in the hidden compartment in the hatch, muffin.”
Krista hated the idea of it, and with her condition, she feared what effect this journey was having on her baby. She and Todd got out. The temperature was even colder than before. She reminded herself it was only another hour or so and crawled into the gaping darkness with her father’s help. They hadn’t brought the blankets from the SUV. Todd gave her an apologetic look then shut the door carefully. Krista lay in the darkness as the car pulled away from the side of the road. Her mind couldn’t help conjuring up an image of Brax. If things were different, she’d have him in her life, and only him. Crushing loss weighed on her, and tears filled her eyes. A broken sob escaped and before she realized it, she was crying harder than she’d ever cried before.
Epilogue
Winnipeg, Canada. Three Years Later
Krista pushed Addy, Alicia Denyse, her daughter, in the swing. Grandma Mara had traded for it recently. Krista loved Winnipeg. The natural beauty wasn’t so different from home, but here she could enjoy the world with relatively few restrictions. Her father hadn’t lied. The community was amazingly protective, and any man who tried to kidnap or rape a woman didn’t live very long, so she felt as safe here as she had in the compound or the protection facility.
Addy giggled. She was so beautiful. Her dark hair was the exact same shade as her father’s. Braxton. Even after all this time, Krista missed him. She couldn’t help wondering what kind of father he would have been. Her six would’ve been good to Addy, and she’d probably have had another baby already.
She’d resisted Mara’s many attempts to set her up with men. She just wasn’t ready yet, maybe she never would be. She’d checked the email account a few months after her flight from Minnesota and there were messages. Hundreds of messages from Braxton, his soulful longings poured out day after day. She still checked every single evening, but it’d been months since he’d written. Krista never replied, not even once, out of fear. She wanted him to know so many things, but she just didn’t know what to say or how to tell him she hadn’t left because she didn’t love him. She missed those messages.
Her father and young stepmother were wonderful. She adored them and so did Addy. She was glad she’d had the courage to run, and knowing her daughter had a much brighter future than she’d had as a child made her loneliness worthwhile. Addy was her life.
“Hello, Kristannie,” a deep, male voice spoke quietly.
Krista froze, afraid to move. She feared her constant longings had finally made her snap. It couldn’t be…Brax?
She turned to look in the direction the masculine voice had originated from. A small gasp escaped her and she turned around toward her daughter again. Momentum kept the giggling toddler moving, but Krista wasn’t pushing her child because her hands were covering her own face. She wasn’t willing to believe what she was seeing. Great, now I’m going crazy and seeing things. Wonderful things. She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When I look back, if he’s not real he’ll be gone. Slowly, she turned and dropped her hands, but her eyes remained tightly shut. Cautiously, she gathered the courage to open her eyes. As beautiful and real as ever, Braxton Bray stood in her father’s backyard.
“Brax?” She breathed the question quietly.
“She’s perfect,” he uttered, gazing with wonder at their daughter. Then his eyes moved to Krista’s face. “I was so angry and scared. I didn’t know if you’d gone by choice. I hated you for a little while.”
“I know. I read your messages,” she whispered, looking away. The raw emotion on his face was too brutal and real. “How did you find me? I’m not going back, and neither is Addy.”
“Addy?” His eyebrow rose.
“Alicia Denyse,” she explained as she gauged his reaction.
“Thank you for using the name. Yo
ur father found me a few months ago at a book signing. He slipped me a note and walked away. He took a hell of a risk.”
“What did the note say?”
“It was cryptic. He wrote, ‘She still loves you. If you want her, move to Winnipeg. She and the child are well’. I dealt with a few things and looked into the process for becoming a Canadian. I’m here on a provincial nomination now. I asked around about where a woman who’d fled from America might be. I received defensive responses, but one man I spoke to contacted the gentleman who heads the security program in your gated community. He spoke to your father and here I am. I’m not going anywhere, Kristannie, unless you don’t want me to stay.”
She ran forward. She gazed into his face and his lips descended. She wrapped her arms around his neck and kissed him as if her life depended on it. The hungry demand of his lips left her stomach twisted in knots. Desire and shock battled for control of her brain.
Addy gave an angry scream and Krista pulled away. The swing had stopped and the girl sat reaching for her mother. Krista went and unbuckled her, picking her up. Brax put out his hands, but Addy shook her head, burying her face shyly into Krista’s shoulder. Guilt twisted inside of her. “Addy, this is your daddy,” she whispered into the girl’s ear. Addy looked over at Brax curiously.
“It’ll take time for her, for all of us. I want to be a family with you, Krista. I didn’t tell the others where you were, I’m selfish. I was worried one of them would come and try to convince you to love them and only them. That’s what I want for me, your love.”
She thought of the others, alone, and felt terrible. If any of them had come, it wouldn’t have been the same. “That’s what I want too,” she whispered. “I love you, Brax.”
A look of pure joy lit his face. “You mean that?”
“With all my heart, it was always only you.”
Given Page 20
