“All in time, sweetheart.” Thomas held up a second paper bag he had with him. “I brought the items you need to get clean. I’ll remove your sleeve before I have to go then take it with me so I can reattach it later.”
A bizarre surge of panic overtook him. “Oh. Oh, okay.” He frowned, pressing his lips together. It was so silly. He’d gone his entire life without one until only very recently. Why should it matter if he was out of it for a few hours?
“Boy. What is it?”
“I-I’m not sure.”
“I think you are. Answer me please.”
Sweat beaded on his forehead. Not only couldn’t he figure out how to squeeze the words out, he couldn’t even order them in his head so that they’d make sense. Perhaps if he asked Thomas the same questions he was asking himself.
“Um, why am I so upset because you’ll be taking the sleeve with you?”
Thomas raised his eyebrows and gaped at him. Linus figured that his query wasn’t what he’d been expecting to hear.
“That’s not for me to answer, but something for you to discover for yourself.”
“But…” He frowned again. Now he was not only mad at himself, he was also getting mad at Thomas. It was one stupid question and he needed his help. “But I…I want to understand.”
He tugged at their joined hands, but Thomas wouldn’t let him go. Instead, he scooted closer until his knee touched Linus’ thigh. Linus turned his head, his confusion making him angry and sad all at the same time.
“Linus, look at me.”
He shook his head, refusing to say it aloud.
“Boy. Look at me now.”
Linus snapped his head in Thomas’ direction. The tone had been severe, but he’d also needed to hear Thomas call him his boy. That moment of clarity helped him to answer his own question about the sleeve.
“Yes, Sir. Please forgive me.”
Thomas leaned in for a kiss. “Always. Do you know what’s troubling you yet?”
“Yes, um, I think so.”
He lowered his head. Just because he understood better didn’t make it any less strange. At least, it seemed like it might be strange. If he told Thomas, then he could probably help him with it. So far, that had worked every time something had bothered or confused him.
“Then tell me please.”
“Okay. I, um, I don’t want to be without your touch for the few hours before you put, um, you put it back on after you come get me.”
“Put…?” Thomas frowned. A glimmer of understanding filled his eyes. “Oh. I see.” Thomas wrapped him in an embrace. “Then let’s take our lunch separately so I can help you with his now.” Thomas released him.
“I-I’m sorry, Sir. I don’t want to ruin your lunch. I can wait until later.”
Thomas stood then held out his hand to him. “Nonsense. This is much more important.”
Linus felt like an idiot.
“Come on now. You’re my submissive and it’s my job to take care of you.”
He accepted Thomas’ offering, hoping that he hadn’t disappointed him too much. They went inside the guesthouse, Thomas laying both bags on the coffee table next to the owl clock. He pulled one of the sandwiches out and set it aside.
“This is for after I leave. Please make sure you eat it. Understand?”
“Yes, Sir.”
He didn’t really have problems with eating, but he had occasionally skipped lunch when he got busy with the plants—especially before Thomas had joined him regularly for his midday meal. Sam would be with Aaron at the house and he hadn’t wanted to intrude, so he’d continued watering or tending to the plants, perhaps eating an orange from one of the trees. Sam had told him to take as many as he wanted.
“Unfasten your pants.”
Linus did as he was told. After dropping his trousers, he presented his cock to Thomas, who sat on the end of the couch. Because it was always fitted to him when he was soft, it prevented him from getting hard. If he became excited with it on, the bindings would tighten uncomfortably to the point where it would stem his arousal. But the most important aspect of it was that it hugged his genitals. It kept him securely within Thomas’ grasp at all times.
After Thomas had removed it, he handed him the second bag. “Go take care of yourself, shower, then come back out here so I can put this back on.”
Linus exhaled in relief as he took the bag. Thomas dug out his own sandwich and unwrapped it from the butcher paper. As he was about to take a bite, he peered up at Linus. He lowered his food.
“Go on then, boy.”
He smiled shyly at Thomas. “Thank you, Sir.”
Thomas gestured with one hand for him to come closer to him. Linus leaned down so that Thomas could give him a leisurely, deep kiss. He held Linus by the nape of his neck, brushing their lips together before plunging in for one more swipe of Linus’ mouth.
“It makes me happy to know that I can make my boy feel good.”
“You do, Sir. I love you.”
Thomas let out a contented sigh. “Oh how I love you, boy.” He straightened then indicated to the bathroom door. “Now get going.”
He smiled—relieved, joyful, every wonderful emotion he could think of. All he had left to do for the rest of the day was to wonder what interesting activity Thomas had planned for them at the club.
Chapter Nine
Sam and Aaron wouldn’t be going to the club that night. They’d been there a lot for the past month or so because of all that had happened with Preston and to get the new rules put in place. Sam had confided to him when they’d worked together in the greenhouse that Aaron had been moody because he hadn’t had the chance to paint for a while. Aaron’s melancholy had begun to affect Sam too. They would be taking the next few days to be alone together. Sam’s mother and sister, Nadine, would come by during business hours to tend to the customers and Nadine would also help take care of the plants.
Linus liked them both, although he’d had limited contact with them. As always, his discomfort around people was at the forefront of his mind. The past few times they’d come by, Linus had kept himself busy in the greenhouse. Nadine was easier for him to interact with. She was only eight or nine years old, so Linus didn’t have the pressure of feeling judged or that something he might say wouldn’t be good enough. Children didn’t care about such things.
He anxiously awaited Thomas’ arrival. Despite how silly he’d felt at the time over needing the bindings immediately on his cock and balls, he was relieved that Thomas had stayed to put them back on. And Thomas certainly hadn’t acted as if what Linus needed was odd. After all, Thomas was the one who’d insisted on it in the first place. Thomas must have realized how significant it was to him. The whole episode had left Linus with a stronger belief in them together, that they were as evenly matched as Thomas had assured him they were. It made him want to do whatever Thomas asked of him, since his Dominant lover seemed to know him so well.
The sun was staying up later and later as they advanced toward summer, so when Thomas pulled up, his headlights were off. The only bad thing about the longer daylight was that they’d have to keep their hands to themselves while he rode in Thomas’ convertible. Linus jumped off the porch, something he hadn’t been able to do with the plug inside him. He snickered at the idea of trying such a thing. He must’ve had a grin on his face from thinking about it.
“Somebody is happy.”
Thomas gave him an affectionate smile as he climbed into the passenger seat. Safely hidden from prying eyes at the end of Aaron and Sam’s secluded property, they indulged in the opportunity to kiss openly.
“Mmm. Such an intoxicating taste.” Thomas placed a small peck on the end of his nose before straightening behind the wheel. “Every single inch of you is edible.” He squeezed Linus’ knee then let go so he could turn the motorcar around.
“I love your taste too, Sir.”
“I noticed.”
He averted his eyes, the experience from a few nights before still fresh in his min
d. They’d worked together for a long while on improving Linus’ cock-eating technique. He’d pleasured Thomas with his mouth over and over. He’d been amazed at how long Thomas could wait before he climaxed. Thomas had released three times over the course of the evening as well, but the third one had been short and there hadn’t been much seed. The other thing that had thrilled Linus was discovering the little bump inside Thomas’ passage that gave so much gratification.
They drove in silence for a while, the warm air whooshing past him as they drew closer to Hampton Road. He toyed with something that had been on his mind for a few days. When he’d first been at the club, the only thing he’d known to do was to try to follow what the other submissives did. Even though he’d been uncomfortable and had barely said more than two words at a time to anyone, he’d managed to follow suit most of the time without too much of a fuss.
One of the initial struggles he’d had was being naked in front of strangers. Even on his dates, he’d never taken off his clothes—there’d never been a reason to. When Ned had dropped him off at the flophouse after his first visit, he’d reminded Linus that if he wanted to find someone who would honestly devote himself to his happiness, Hampton Road would be an ideal place to start. At the time, Linus hadn’t understood what Ned had meant when he’d spoken of Linus’ natural submissiveness. Being with Thomas had gone a long way to help with that understanding.
But Ned had also said that he’d have to take a chance. That he’d have to push himself to do things that scared him at first in order to find the man who would cherish him and lead him to his full potential. All of Ned’s advice had seemed like a baffling mystery that he would never solve. As it turned out, Thomas had been the key to the puzzle and anything that remained for Linus to discover would be with him.
With that in mind, Linus really wanted to start over for himself too. It had become important that he please Thomas as much as he possibly could. It made him proud of himself. When he’d licked and sucked Thomas to completion three times over the course of a couple of hours, his jaw had ached, his lips had been swollen and his tongue had been raw. But it had all been worth it to witness how sated and relaxed Thomas had been. He’d done that. He’d satisfied Thomas.
“What’s going on in that gorgeous head of yours?”
Instinctively, Linus reached across to take Thomas’ hand then yanked it back when he remembered.
“I know, sweetheart. We’ll be there soon then I’ll have you naked and all to myself.”
“Yeah.” He swallowed a few times, hoping to work up more nerve to speak. “I-I, um, I like being yours.”
He glanced sideways at Thomas and noted that his brow was furrowed. “I’m thrilled to hear that. But I know you, boy. What are you trying to tell me?”
“Oh. Well, um…” It was turning out to be even harder than the cock sleeve conversation.
“Breathe, sweetheart. Anything you say is fine. I love you no matter what.”
“Okay.” He took a few deep breaths and reminded himself how much Thomas loved him and how he’d never, ever made fun of or treated him as if he was silly.
“I love you too.” That had been easy to say. He thought he could keep going. “I, um, when you first met me at the club, um…” He took another breath. I can do this. “I was with the other submissives in the den.” One more breath. “And, um, I was naked when you picked me…” His focus was lost for a moment as he remembered how stunned he’d been by Thomas’ handsomeness when he’d first seen him.
“Boy?”
“Oh. Well, I was thinking, um…” One more really deep breath. “I’d like it if you would train me to be with you in the main part of the club.”
When Thomas didn’t respond right away, he turned to see if he was upset for any reason. Instead he saw him holding a grin behind his hand, his eyes crinkled in obvious happiness. They reached a traffic light and Thomas stopped. As the car idled, Thomas glanced around the primarily empty street. He extended his hand across the leather upholstered bench seat. He laid it there, palm up, his fingers wiggling in invitation. Linus bit his lip, so excited because he could tell that Thomas was too.
He grasped his warm hand, careful to keep their bodies discreetly apart. But Thomas clutched at him, and the simple gesture told him volumes about how Thomas felt about his offer. The rest of the ride was made in an anticipatory silence as Linus contemplated what he might expect when they arrived.
The twilight was upon them as they pulled through the ornate wrought-iron gates of Hampton Road. Linus saw it through new eyes. It was very elegant, but no longer as imposing to him as it once had been. Thomas had altered his perception of the club so that it had become the sanctuary he knew the rest of the men saw it as. With Thomas, he could explore safely there, surrounded by men who understood that they all needed to express their love in different ways and that it was all right that they did.
Once the valet had taken their car, Thomas offered his arm to Linus. “Shall we go through the member entrance then?”
Linus nodded then remembered. “Y-yes, Sir.”
He laid his hand on Thomas’ sleeve, feeling very proper all of a sudden. Even without all the spankings, fucking and other pleasures Linus freely indulged in, he’d never expected to be a part of such a sophisticated group of people. It was a world removed from his life on the farm in Oklahoma. A world he wished to be a permanent part of from then on.
* * * *
Thomas had him tied facedown and naked on the bed in a private room toward the back. It was the most amazing bed he’d ever seen—as if being in a fairy tale. Not only did the enormous bed boast gold and magenta drapes attached to the hand-carved canopy, but the four posts were a heavily carved dark wood, solid and almost separate furnishings in their own right.
Linus waited, trying not wiggle from the anticipation of what mysterious pleasure Thomas had planned for him. Thomas had tied his arms above his head, capturing his wrists in silk cords he’d tied to one of the posts. The mattress was stripped bare—save for the silky cream sheets. Linus lay diagonally across it. Thomas had also stuffed two down pillows under his stomach, his rear positioned at a slightly higher level than the rest of his body.
His lover had encouraged his thighs open, but his legs weren’t restrained in any way. Thomas had placed a red mask over his eyes instead of the blindfold, so he knew Thomas would likely spank him the way he usually did whenever he used an eye covering. He’d been very clear from their first time together that he preferred to have his boys focused on their bodies. He wanted every sensation heightened as much as possible.
Thomas had once again asked Linus if it was okay. They’d come up with a system that Linus believed was a good way to handle any acts that might fill Linus with trepidation. If Linus agreed to an activity three times, then Thomas would stop asking him if it was okay to do. He would always be able to call mercy if he changed his mind. He was no longer asked about spanking.
He adjusted his position somewhat, wriggling as he did.
“Someone must need their ass spanked very hard the way they’re begging for it.”
There it was again—that strange urge to giggle. He couldn’t figure it out.
“Yes, Sir.”
No point in pretending.
It had been several minutes, so Linus couldn’t help but wonder what was taking Thomas so long. There’d been the typical shuffling around of items in his bag then not much else in the way of sound. A few noises here and there, and at one point it had sounded as if he was carving an apple. It was possible. Maybe he needed a snack before they began.
The bed dipped as Thomas sat next to him. Thomas petted him, stroked him the way he always did before they began. He didn’t need a reminder anymore that Thomas cared about his well-being, that he loved him. But it was comforting and he wouldn’t change it for anything.
“Sweetheart, I want to do something completely different with you tonight. I know how you like having your ass filled and I believe you’ll love this. Howev
er, I’d rather just do it to you instead of explaining it first then asking if you agree to it. How do you feel about that?”
When he frowned, the edges of the mask scraped across his eyebrows. His initial reaction to Thomas’ words had been discomfort, anxiousness. He breathed evenly the way Thomas had taught him and took into consideration how much pleasure his lover had given him with every interaction they’d ever had. Thomas had never hurt him. He’d never taken anything from him without asking. Even with his current request, he’d asked if it was okay if he didn’t ask. Why wouldn’t he let him do whatever he wanted with his body? Trust that he would always be there, that he wouldn’t let him fall. Wasn’t that the whole point of truly surrendering to a Master?
Oh. Oh my. Now I understand.
“Thomas, I mean, Sir! I understand!”
Chuckling, Thomas continued running his fingers through the strands of hair not held prisoner by the ties of the mask. “Whatever it is, you’re very excited about it. What do you understand, boy?”
“Surrender. I want to surrender to you, I…oh, um…I mean, I trust you. Really trust you. Don’t ask, um, don’t ask about what you can do. I know that I can, um, always cry mercy. That you’ll listen to me.” He had to stop to catch his breath. “I give myself to you, Sir. Really give myself.”
“Oh, Linus.”
Thomas’ voice was soft, and he’d thought he’d detected a slight tremor in it. Warm breath fanned over the side of his neck and Thomas nibbled at his skin. He moved his lips down to take Linus’ mouth in a soft kiss, gently coaxing him to open up with his tongue before delving inside.
Thomas kissed him for a long while. Sometimes he would dip in and out, other times capturing his lips, taking what he wanted over and over without letting go. When he stopped, they were both gasping for air, the sweet aroma of Thomas’ breath an elixir to him.
“Thank you. Such a lovely gift to me. I treasure you above all else.”
“I-I treasure you too, Sir.”
Thomas caressed his head, his back. “Soon it will be Master.”
The Fear of Surrender Page 12
