“He told me that it was worse, and if I wanted to survive, they would have to cure me, and that he really did want all of what was going on to stop.” Eva let out a ragged breath. “I had these dreams of a woman telling me to give them what they wanted, and the priest telling me to let them cure me. It was so very strange.”
“How could you give them what they wanted when you had no control?”
“I don’t know. My body betrayed me even when I tried to stop my thoughts about women. They showed me…” Eva stopped talking for a long moment. “My mind always betrayed me.”
Zoe took Eva into her arms and reassured her; there were no words to comfort Eva. Zoe did what she always did when Eva was confronted with her memories. She held her and waited.
“Larissa was the best thing to happen to me,” Eva replied. “It led me to you.”
Zoe smiled. “And I thank God for you.”
“Life is a circle,” Eva said softly.
“And it started with Greta?”
“No. It started when Greta wanted me to be at the Youth rally instead of at home.”
“Kristallnacht,” Zoe said, getting the connection. “Why did you go?”
“I gave my word.” The smile vanished, and Eva answered the question in a tired, resigned tone. “I also hoped to persuade her not to get married. I loved her that much. I would have done anything for her. If I hadn’t gone...”
“You would be dead,” Zoe finished Eva’s sentence. “You wouldn’t have been able to stop them from killing your mother. They were a frenzied mob.”
“I find it hard to believe they would mistake my mother for a Jewess.”
“Maybe Reinhardt was correct in that your stepfather ordered her death. But now we know he lied about Greta, so is there anything we can believe? Why do you think the mob wouldn’t have made a mistake with your mother?”
“She wore a big gold cross around her neck; she never took it off,” Eva replied, scrubbing at her red-rimmed eyes with the back of her hand. “I just can’t—”
“Please, stop beating yourself up over something you can’t change,” Zoe pleaded, knowing that it would take more than words to alter Eva’s thinking. Nevertheless, she had to try. “You have to stop hurting yourself.”
“I’m not—”
“Yes, you are. You are letting those bastards hurt you again.” Zoe gentled her tone when Eva flinched. “Muller is gone—he’s in Nuremberg and will rot in hell soon. Your uncle will get his turn. I can’t bear to see you in pain. Greta is not dead, like you’ve thought all this time, but your mother is gone. None of what happened in the past was your fault.”
“I know, and I try not to think about the past, but seeing Greta today just caught me so off guard.”
“What did she want?”
“I think she wants to resume our relationship.”
“In her dreams,” Zoe snorted. “You’re mine.”
“She wants to have dinner and talk.”
“Okay,” Zoe said, trying to recall everything that she had to do later in the day. “When is she coming for dinner?”
“I can’t remember,” Eva replied a little sheepishly. “I was so stunned, all I could do was agree to invite her to dinner.”
“Is she coming back to the office?”
“Yes.” Eva nodded. “I think I made an appointment for her.”
“Well, I’m going to come over to your office in the afternoon. Do you want me to do that?”
“Yes,” Eva answered eagerly.
“That’s settled then,” Zoe declared, giving Eva a kiss. “You think a warm bath would be nice?”
Eva nodded.
Zoe got off Eva’s lap and helped her up. She put her arms around Eva and hugged her. “I’m sorry I wasn’t here yesterday when you came home. Together, we will work this out.” She unbuttoned Eva’s sleep-wrinkled shirt and let it drop to the floor, and then she put her arms around her slender waist and looked up into her tired face. “Greta is a stupid bitch for giving you up, but her loss is my gain.” She smiled and led Eva into the bathroom to give her some much-needed comfort and care.
Chapter Forty-Four
David Harrison was a happy man. His meeting with his boss at the War Crimes Unit had gone very well. He was given a commendation for the capture of Muller and Rhimes, which he had been asked to pass on to Friedrich as well. In addition, two more suspected war criminals had been arrested. The last few months had proven to be quite fruitful for the federal agent and his partner.
David entered his office carrying additional files on new German immigrants which he needed to crosscheck with the wanted list. As he put down the files, he got smacked in the face by a crumpled ball of paper.
“Good aim, Freddy. I think the bin is over there,” he said and pointed to the empty wastebasket near the desk. Around the wicker container were a dozen crumpled balls of paper. “Oh no, you’re not attempting yet another love letter are you?”
“Shut up,” Friedrich muttered, going back to his writing.
“Wouldn’t it be quicker to just tell the girl?”
“I can’t,” Friedrich replied, his frustration clear.
David sighed and sat down in the chair opposite Friedrich’s desk. “Mate, this is one time I can’t help you. Just tell her you love her.”
“What if she doesn’t love me back?”
“Oh, bloody hell,” David said beneath his breath as he shook his head. “Do you think she’s interested in you?” he asked aloud.
“Uh, yes.”
“Where is the problem?”
“Unlike you, I don’t have the gift of the gab.”
“Yes, but that shouldn’t stop you. Tell her how you feel even if you think you can’t. You can do it, and if you find you want to marry her, then you ask her. Elena is a nice girl.”
“I know.” Friedrich crumpled another sheet of paper and threw it. It landed next to the other discarded balls on the floor near the bin.
“Here.” David placed a list and a stack of files in front of Friedrich. “This should take your mind off love letters for a while.”
“What’s that?”
“The latest immigration list. The boss man wants us to cross-check them with the wanted list.”
Friedrich rolled his eyes. “As if they would put their real names down!”
“You know some of them are that stupid. Pete found three last week. Same first name, surname, and age. No wonder they lost the war. You take half, and I’ll take half. We can go through them to see which boofhead used his real name.”
Friedrich looked at the long list of names and sighed. “Then what?” he asked.
David grinned. “Then we get to see happy snapshots. Just imagine thousands of photographs just waiting for us to examine.”
“Is Henry still in Melbourne?”
“Yep. Just the two of us, Freddy!”
Friedrich made a face, but took the first sheet with the names on it and began to read down the list, pausing now and then to make a check mark with his pen.
***
“I’m going to come by your office after my morning classes, all right?” Zoe put her arms around Eva’s waist and glanced up, noting Eva’s smile. She also noted that some tiredness remained etched into Eva’s face, and she wanted more than anything to make Greta disappear. Her long chat with Eva in the early hours of the morning had exposed Eva’s anxiety over Greta’s reappearance in her life. Eva had felt better once she was able to express her shock and put things into perspective. They had talked while Zoe helped her with her bath, although Eva could manage quite well on her own. The shared gesture of affection and caring had helped them both to recover a little from the emotionally fraught situation.
“Only if you don’t have classes this afternoon,” Eva reminded her, and lightly kissed her on the lips.
“I don’t have any afternoon classes today,” Zoe said. “My last class is at 11 am. Earl has some books he wants to give me. He’s working night shift this week, so I won’t hassle
him too much.” I’ll be by around noon.” They turned when they heard Elena call out Zoe’s name from the corridor.
“You’re going to be late.” Eva tapped Zoe on the nose with her forefinger.
“Are you feeling better?”
“Much better,” Eva said her smile widening.
Zoe was not sure if Eva was just trying to reassure her, or if that was indeed how she felt. Eva was very good at shielding her feelings sometimes. Zoe gave Eva a quick kiss before she left the apartment.
“Come on, Zoe!” Elena yelled again. She was checking her watch and looked quite agitated by the time Zoe came bounding down the stairs.
“I’m coming,” Zoe muttered as she stopped at the last step. She had an idea and pursed her lips in thought. “Hey, El, we have to make a stop into the church.”
“Why?”
“I want to speak to Father H.”
***
Zoe left Elena at the bus stop and quickly made her way to the small house attached to the church. After introducing herself to the housekeeper, she was escorted inside to wait for Father Haralambos.
“Good morning,” Zoe greeted Father Haralambos when he came into the living room. “Can I speak to you for a minute?”
“Absolutely.”
“I think Eva needs you this morning,” Zoe said, getting to the heart of why she was there and not wanting to waste any time.
“She does? Is something wrong?” he asked, frowning.
“Yes.”
“Are you two fighting?”
“No! No, I mean...I think it’s best if Eva tells you about it.”
Father Haralambos’ frown deepened. “You’re acting a little strange, Zoe.”
“No, it’s not me that needs you, it’s Eva.”
“All right. I’ll go and see her now.”
“Thanks,” Zoe said. She gave him a kiss on his cheek and ran back down the corridor and out of the front door.
***
Eva opened the door and smiled, clearly pleased by her father’s unexpected visit. “Good morning, Father. Come in.” She ushered him inside. “Want a cup of tea?”
“Oh, I just had one. You look like you’ve had a very rough night. Are you all right?”
Eva’s smile faltered. “Did Zoe come to you?”
“My child, if Zoe hadn’t come and I had seen your face today, I think I would have guessed there was something wrong,” Father Haralambos said as he put his arm around her shoulders. Eva melted into his embrace, resting her head on his shoulder. “Want to tell me about what’s bothering you and what’s got Zoe acting strangely?” he asked. They walked to the sofa and sat down. He took Eva’s hands and held them, watching her intently.
“It’s a long story, Father, and you have to go to church,” Eva said.
Father Haralambos smiled. “I love long stories and you are my daughter. In any event, you belong to the congregation, and therefore I’m already in church. Why don’t you tell me this long story?”
Eva sighed. “In 1938, I had a friend...well, she was someone whom I absolutely loved with all my heart.”
“A lover,” Father Haralambos said matter-of-factly.
“Well...um, yes.” Eva was unused to being so open about her sexuality, especially with her father. Father Haralambos had a way of just stating the obvious, and he would continue to do so even though it somewhat embarrassed Eva.
“Did this friend have a name?” he asked.
“Greta Strauss.”
Father Haralambos stroked his beard in thought. “Is this the same Greta Strauss who made Muller so demented?”
“Yes, the same Greta,” Eva continued. “Well, she was the first person...uh...”
“You were intimate with,” Father Haralambos finished.
“Do you have to be so blunt?” Eva protested.
“Why? You mean you weren’t intimate with her?” he asked in mock surprise.
“Um, yes, I did.”
“Well, what do you want to call it then?” Father Haralambos gave Eva a gentle poke, causing her to let out an embarrassed giggle.
“Well, she was my first lover,” Eva said, not looking him in the eye. “I thought she had died because Reinhardt went to Muller and told him about us.”
“You blamed yourself for her death?”
Eva nodded. “I thought that if I hadn’t fallen in love with her, she wouldn’t have died, Mother wouldn’t have died and...” Eva stopped and closed her eyes, visibly composing herself.
“Oh, my sweet Eva, you don’t know what would have happened if you had chosen not to do the things you did. We all have doubts about our actions. What if I hadn’t gone on the train? What if I had escaped, like you and Thanasi wanted me to? What would have happened? I would have been safe. My life would have been quite different.”
Eva nodded, acknowledging his statements and train of thought.
“You can’t blame yourself for something you couldn’t control.”
“Greta turned up yesterday in my office.”
Father Haralambos’ bushy eyebrows shot up. “Well, she’s not dead then,” he said.
“She said that Reinhardt lied to me. She hadn’t died. She had gone to her uncle’s place or something like that. My mind was numb, so I only half remember what she said,” Eva recalled. “I was so shocked. She wants to pick up where we left off, though she’s married now, I think. At the office, she gave her last name as Wagner.”
Father Haralambos bent a penetrating look at Eva and asked, “Do you still have feelings for her?”
“Zoe wanted to ask me that question all night but she resisted.” Eva smiled sadly. “I know what this is going to do to her.”
“Does Zoe have a reason to be worried about Greta turning up?” he asked, watching Eva’s face closely.
“No!” Eva pulled away from him and shook her head violently. “Absolutely not.”
“Did you tell Zoe that?”
“Not in so many words, but...”
“Hmm.” Father Haralambos stroked his beard again. “You might want to tell her.”
“Zoe knows how much I love her,” Eva said.
“So why did you get upset when you met this woman again? Why not surprise or happiness that she was alive?” Father Haralambos asked. “What happened when you came home? Did you two talk about it?”
Eva sat in silence for a moment with her head bowed, playing with the ring on her finger. “Zoe wasn’t here. She hadn’t come home yet and I sat by myself.” She sighed. “I was upset and I wanted her to be here very badly.”
“I would be unsettled if someone whom I thought was dead was standing in front of me,” Father Haralambos stated. “You and Greta were lovers in the past, so I can understand that her reappearance made for a distressing situation.”
“I don’t know why it just unsettled me so.”
“Do you still have feelings for this woman?”
Eva looked up. “No.”
“She was your lover and you don’t have feelings for her? Not even a little?”
“Father, I don’t love Greta,” Eva answered. She paused. “I know I don’t.”
“Is she like Zoe?”
Eva laughed. “No,” she said. “They are two very different personalities.”
“How so?”
Eva sat back on the sofa and smiled. “Zoe is passionate about what she believes and doesn’t give up on anything. She has this unconquerable spirit that I love so much.”
“This love you have for Zoe is much more than how beautiful she is?”
Eva nodded. “Zoe is the most beautiful woman I have ever met, but it’s not her outer beauty that is so special. It’s what’s inside of her. She cares deeply and she loves with her whole soul. I love her so much,” she said quietly, her wonderment clear as she considered the woman who held the prominent place in her heart. “Greta can’t have what she wants to get from me.”
“What’s that?”
“My heart. And my soul. They both belong to Zoe.” Eva looked down an
d sighed. “I loved Greta once, very deeply, but I can’t compare it to what I have with Zoe. Greta is not in Zoe’s league. Never was and never will be.”
“Thank you for sharing that with me.”
Eva smiled. “Talking about Zoe is one of my favorite pastimes.”
“So I gather,” Father Haralambos said. “Now, what are you going to do?”
“Greta wants to have dinner and talk.”
“Alone?”
“I don’t think she wants to have dinner with me and everyone else in the building,” Eva quipped, getting a mock glare from Father Haralambos.
“Is that what you want?” he asked.
Eva shook her head. “No. I want Zoe to be there with me. Greta is coming over to the office in the afternoon and I’ve asked Zoe to be there.”
“And then she will come here?” he asked. Eva nodded. “Hmm, well, I have to meet this Greta.” Father Haralambos kissed the top of Eva’s dark head a second time. “I’ll be here if you want to talk to me.”
“Thank you, Father,” Eva replied, kissing him on the cheek. She nodded, not meeting his eyes. “I love you,” she whispered as she hugged him tightly.
Chapter Forty-Five
The lift doors opened and Eva exited into the unusually quiet waiting room. Only three people were seated, waiting for their appointments. She was feeling more emotionally settled after her chat with Father Haralambos, and talking to Zoe about Greta had also eased the awful tension that had hurt so much.
At the reception desk, Debbie was on the phone, but waved at Eva to get her attention. Eva stood nearby and waited patiently until Debbie finished the call.
“Good morning, Debbie,” she said.
“Ah, good morning, Eva. Are you feeling better today?” Debbie asked a little shyly. “I was concerned about you yesterday. You are normally a very retiring person, but yesterday I thought you looked upset. Was it a client who upset you? Is something wrong? Can I help at all?”
“I’m sorry I was rather quiet in the afternoon,” Eva apologized, feeling a little self-conscious at being the center of Debbie’s focus.
“Hey, we all have bad days. Usually mine strikes before I get my you-know-what, and I am quiet as a mouse when I’m not yelling.” They laughed, and Debbie gave Eva a chocolate bar. “I usually find chocolate makes my day ever so much nicer.”
Where Shadows Linger (Intertwined Souls Series Book 2) Page 34
