“Ah, Gwenith, fairy of the sea, enchantress of my heart, I love you as well. I have been drawn to you since the moment that I saw you. Your resilient spirit, ability to laugh in the face of darkness, and lush beauty captivate me. I didn’t want this – and I can’t promise you forever. But I can give you my love, in this night, in this moment – I will honor you and our feelings.”
It was enough for Gwen, for ultimately, who can promise tomorrow? She didn’t need or want the promise of forever when they might very well die in the morning. Warmth filled her, and a new power, one unknown to her, made her step back. Eyes on his, she pulled her shirt over her head and quickly removed her pants. Standing there, naked as he’d seen her twice before, she flushed, uncertainty filling her for the first time since she’d kissed him.
“Gwen, you stop my heart. I’ve ached to touch you since I met you. You’ve no clue the beauty or power you hold,” Loch said, stepping forward and wrapping his arms around her, claiming her mouth once again with his own. “I wondered why you dressed like you hated your body, but now I’m grateful you did. For you have kept the most beautiful secret private, for me to explore.”
Gwen shivered at his words, but she had no fear. Loch was nothing if not honorable and she trusted him to show her how to love.
She gasped as he trailed a hand down to cup one of her breasts, palming it gently, as new sensations coursed through her, a liquid heat that made her squirm. Gently, he prodded her lips open with his tongue, tasting and teasing, never breaking his rhythm, as he slowly walked her back toward the bed, easing her down on the silken sheets.
“I want to touch you,” Gwen said, pulling back from his kiss to meet his eyes, which had turned molten. She tugged gently at his shirt, needing to touch his skin, to see him. Understanding, Loch stood and quickly divested himself of clothing, standing before her all rippling muscle and proud maleness. Gwen swallowed as her eyes trailed down his body, and she gulped. There was no way they would fit together.
Unable to help herself, she traced her hands over the hard muscles of his chest, down over the ridges of his abs, and, looking up at him with a question in her eyes, even lower when he nodded. Delighted, she explored with such enthusiasm that he finally cuffed her hands and brought them to his lips, kissing them before pinning them over her head. Easing himself down until his weight pressed her to the bed, Loch began his own exploration.
Gwen shuddered as his lips found a sensitive spot at her neck, and he nuzzled in, blowing a warm breath against her skin before nibbling lightly at her ear. Capturing her lips in a searing kiss once more, Loch stayed there until Gwen began to moan against his mouth, her hips beginning to move of their own accord, aching for something she didn’t yet know.
“Soon, my love, soon,” Loch promised, and trailed kisses down her neck until his lips discovered her breasts. It was as though it was the first time he’d seen such a sight, and Gwen’s eyes almost rolled back in her head. He spent considerable time and attention there, until she was shaking beneath him, wanting him so much she could barely breathe, and they’d only just begun.
“Please… I need…” Gwen found herself begging, her hands tangled in his hair, her hips arching from the bed.
“I will show you what you need, my beautiful Gwen,” Loch whispered as his lips trailed over her stomach, finding the soft flesh of her thighs, then parting her where she most wanted him. Unable to hold back, the new sensation of being loved like this took her over the edge and, riding a wave of pleasure that was so strong her back bowed from the bed, she sobbed her release.
“You’ve enchanted me, my mistress of the seas,” Loch gasped, kissing his way up her body and taking her mouth once more in a kiss made deeply intimate by the way he pressed himself against her. “I will forever cherish this gift you’ve give me – this moment we have.”
Gwen sobbed against his mouth as he took her innocence, but in return gave her his heart. For there was nothing truly lost, when love was gained.
Chapter Thirty-Five
Loch smiled while Gwen enjoyed another first later that evening – bathing with a man. Delighted to find a huge tub in the attached bathroom, she sighed as Loch washed her body, lazily soaping her and paying careful attention to where she was most tender.
“Is it always this way? Does it always feel so good?” Gwen asked, tilting her head to look at him with love.
“No, it’s not always this way. Sex is, of course, pleasurable. But there is pleasure for the sake of quick release and then there is a deeper pleasure – love, both physical and emotional – that makes it what battles are fought for and legends made of.”
Gwen gazed at the man across from her, hopelessly besotted, and smiled at him. Loch saw the look, one of true love, and felt the nervousness slip through him once more. He wasn’t sure whether he was scared because he’d seen his mother mourn the death of his father for years and had vowed never to love like that, or if it was because of what he had been told, by a great seer, was his destiny.
Either way, he loved this woman before him – yet he should have had better restraint, for he could never be with her. Not truly. And it wasn’t fair to her, Loch thought, as she chattered away, glowing with love and happiness, all flushed skin and lush curves, her earlier nervousness about being naked around him now gone.
“Tell me about your family,” Gwen said, eerily zeroing in on what he’d been thinking of.
“It’s just my mother and myself,” Loch said, picking up the sponge again to wash lazy circles around her breast, causing her breath to hitch a bit.
“Hatched from an egg, were you?” Gwen asked.
Loch smiled at her, though sadness washed through him when he thought of his father. “No, my father passed on. Killed in a great battle, years past.”
“I’m sorry,” Gwen said, reaching up a hand to touch his face, her look of concern genuine.
Loch felt that pull wash over him – wanting to lay his head down on her breast and let her hold him – before dismissing it. He was supposed to be the Protector, not her. He didn’t need her comfort.
“It was harder watching my mother mourn, I think,” he said.
“I can imagine. Was it a great love between them?”
“One for the ages,” Loch said, and continued to wash her, keeping his eyes on her body and not her face.
“That’s a terrible loss to have lived through, then. Especially as a child, to try and fill that gap of loneliness. I’m sorry for that,” Gwen said, once again seeing unerringly through him.
“Aye. It’s why loving to that level isn’t smart,” Loch said, knowing his words would be harsh after what they’d just shared, but needing her to understand where his hurts came from. “It’s foolish.”
Gwen opened her mouth to say something, but Loch cut her off, slanting his mouth across hers and trailing his hands over her body, driving her ruthlessly to the peak so that she gasped and shuddered beneath him. Then, picking her up from the tub, he carried her to the bed and loved her with an intensity that she would remember forever.
For in the morning, he would have to walk away before he shattered her innocent heart, which even now dreamed of a future together.
Chapter Thirty-Six
“Good morning, handsome,” Gwen said, rolling over in bed and delighted to see Loch moving around the room, packing their gear. “Perhaps you’d like to come back to bed?”
“No time for that. It’s best to keep moving. Even if your family is holding the Domnua at bay, it isn’t fair of us to leisurely while the day away when they are out there dying for our cause.”
Stung, Gwen pulled the sheet around her and stood, making her way to the bathroom. She stopped at the door and turned to look at him.
“I’m well aware we are mid-battle, but my mother herself said to seize moments – moments that matter – and last night mattered. At least to me.”
Loch sighed and scrubbed his face, looking mutinous.
A warning sounded in her head. “Or am I foolish to think it was
meaningful?”
“Listen, I know a lot of things were said in the heat of passion…” Loch began, and Gwen held up a hand, the other one gripping the sheet tightly around her.
“Don’t. Don’t do this. Not to me,” she said, her chin held high and her eyes burning with unshed tears.
“Last night was great, sure, but as I told you – this isn’t forever. I had a nice time and I know you did as well. I thought it was important that your first time be with someone who took the time to care for you and show you what love can be like.”
“There’s that pesky ‘love’ word again,” Gwen said, her voice hitching. She would not cry.
Loch ran his hand through his hair, looking decidedly uncomfortable, and kept glancing toward the door.
“Gwen, I think you are incredible. But I can’t be with you. Do you understand that? It’s best all round if we leave it at what it was. A beautiful night we can look back fondly on years from now. It’s time to get back to this battle, find the spear, and finish this up. Our people need us.”
Gwen stared at him, a million things racing through her head. She wanted to scream at him that he was lying, she knew it – he’d felt something. Nobody could love another the way he had and remain untouched at his very core. She just didn’t understand why he was doing this. Gwen thought to Amynta, how proud she’d been, and how easily she’d explained that love, once given, would always live in her heart. She’d given Loch her love last night, and no matter what might come, it lived in him. As his lived in her.
“You’re right, Loch. Our people do need us. Thank you for the reminder, and I’ll be certain to not distract you from the quest from now on. Perhaps you should go check the perimeter while I finish packing our supplies?”
A look of relief passed over Loch’s face, which stabbed Gwen to her core. Relief that she wasn’t going to make a big drama about this, relief that he could move on without her. Despite trying to channel Amynta, pain coursed through her.
“I would suggest, though…” Gwen said, making Loch stop at the door and turn, “that the next time a woman bares her heart to you, you’re more careful in your response. It’s not kind, and I did expect more kindness from you. But, at least now I know what to avoid in my next lover.”
The dark storm that flashed violently over Loch’s face at the mention of her taking another lover only solidified what she felt inside. The man loved her and he was being an idiot. But why?
Frustrated, she let the tears come in the shower, and made a promise to herself that she would try to keep her heart open – no matter what lay ahead – as Amynta had reminded her she would need to do on this journey.
And so she would fight, for the spear and for love, and for all those who dared to believe in happy ever afters.
Chapter Thirty-Seven
Shouting drew Gwen from the cottage at a dead run, her head whirling in every direction until she spotted Seamus and Loch in a standoff at the edge of the cliffs. When Seamus drew back a hand to punch Loch, Gwen almost screeched, but was scared to distract them lest they fall.
They were too far away for her to hear what they said, but Gwen had an idea of what it was about. Loch dodged the blow and turned his back on Seamus, and Gwen watched in disbelief as he slung a pack over his shoulder and took off across the ridge of the mountains and disappeared from sight.
“What the hell?” Gwen breathed.
“Oh, Gwen, are you okay?” Bianca bounded around the side of the hut and threw her arms around Gwen, pulling back and clucking like a mother hen as she studied Gwen’s face.
“I’m fine, I’m fine. What’s going on? Why the fighting?” Gwen asked, peering over Bianca’s shoulder to see Seamus stalking back to them, his usually sunny face cloaked in rage.
“Loch told us about last night – and about how he’d left things with you. He told us to watch out for you and that he couldn’t be near you anymore. Seamus had a fit. Landed a few good punches, too – not that Loch put up a fight.”
“He what?” Gwen choked. He’d taken their private moments and told others about them?
“When Seamus pressed him on why he was leaving, he told us. I’m so sorry, honey. Are you okay? What can I do for you? Did he at least treat you well? I guess that’s a stupid question based on this morning, but you know what I mean – was he gentle? Oh, I can’t believe I’m asking this stuff. I’m just so worried for you right now,” Bianca said. She patted Gwen’s arms helplessly, looking so miserable for her that Gwen sighed and pulled her into a hug.
“I’m fine. I really am. He showed me an amazing night and I will deal with the pain of this morning. After all, I come from a long line of warrior goddesses and all that, right? Heartbreak may be new to me, but it certainly isn’t something that I can’t handle,” Gwen said, and felt grateful for Bianca when she gave an extra tight squeeze before stepping back. They both turned to look at Seamus, who stood looking about as awkward as a man could, all but wringing his hands as he tried to figure out what to say.
“Seamus. Thank you for defending my honor. It wasn’t necessary, but I appreciate it,” Gwen said, trying to put him at ease. “I’m strong enough to handle this.”
Seamus studied her for a moment and, seeming to see what he needed to see, he nodded.
“It’s right shite, that’s the truth of it. No way to be treating a lady such as yourself,” Seamus said, shaking his head as he pulled their supplies onto his back. Silently, they each took a pack and then turned to look around them.
“I suppose we should head in the direction he went? Or go the other way?” Bianca said, nodding angrily toward where Loch had disappeared into the hills.
“Fire and ice,” Gwen murmured, pointing to where molten lava met snowcapped peaks. “We might as well start with fire.”
They trudged along in silence for a while, partly because the view was so astounding it was difficult to take it in, and partly, Gwen thought, because they felt awkward about what had transpired between her and Loch. Her tender muscles reminded her of their night with each step they took, and she did her best to cast her mind to any other topic. As they seamlessly left the sunshine behind and stepped into the moonlit part of the island, Gwen pointed down to the beach below them.
“I met my mother last night,” she said.
Bianca gasped, turning toward her with delight. “Tell me everything.”
By the time Gwen had wrapped up the story, Bianca’s eyes were practically bugging out in delight at the new information about the mermaids, while Seamus had what seemed to be a look of dawning understanding on his face.
“I remember now… about Loch’s father. This is beginning to make sense,” Seamus said and Gwen’s stomach dropped.
“I swear to god, if you tell me that Loch’s father is my father too, I will push you off the side of this mountain,” Gwen bit out.
“What? No! God, no. Sorry if I gave that impression,” Seamus said, a smile flitting across his face for the first time since she’d seen him yesterday.
“What about his father? He told me that he died.”
“He did. It is one of the most widely known stories of our people, actually. I’ve told you that Loch is a great sorcerer, no?” Seamus said, and they settled in to listen to the story, slowly making progress along the ridgeline, the full moon lighting their way.
“Well, his family is known throughout the Danula. Most notably his father is legendary for the advances he made for our society and the great magicks he wielded in the face of major threats to the fae. I’m talking top-level stuff, the type of things you hear of in legends and myths.”
“His father was big magick then,” Bianca said.
“Aye, he was. And his mother – oh, she is one of the great beauties of the fae, one of the most sought-after women in our history. But she had eyes only for Loch’s father. They had one of those love matches that transcends time. Unfortunately, his mother was tricked one day, by some very dark magick.”
The skin prickled at the back of G
wen’s neck. “Tricked how?”
“You see, they’d been trying for more children – as you know, it is tough for fae to conceive and carry children. Loch was still young, maybe seven or so, and his mother desperately wanted more children. She’d gone to a healer she’d heard tell of, far from our realm, and the healer promised strong magick to help her fertility.”
“Oh no,” Bianca whispered.
“His mother readily agreed, not knowing that the oath she signed was one of blood magick. As in, she would trade her own life to bear another child. You see, the dark magick was wielded by Nasslirus – those who collect the souls of great beauties and powerful wizards to form a parallel realm of their own making.”
“His father tried to kill the Nasslirus?”
“Well, yes. In a way. See, they did conceive, and one day, as they were nearing the time of birth, happy as can be, a black bird – black as night – came to their door and delivered the message of doom. That the day of birth would also be a time of death.”
“Oh… oh no.” Gwen shook her head.
“And his father intervened. He traveled to the realm and found the witch doctor, sacrificing himself on the spot, before Loch’s mother could protest, before anything could be changed. He knew how blood magick worked. The problem was, the contract was airtight. The Nasslirus was delighted – now he would get a much more powerful soul than Loch’s mother. His mother has mourned the loss heavily her whole life. No matter what suitors came to her, no matter what magicks were offered to soothe her soul, she’s never taken them. Instead she’s committed herself to helping others and looking after Loch and his sister with a fierceness one might almost deem insufferable if there wasn’t such tragedy behind it.”
Gwen felt sick to her stomach. Her heart ached for this woman she didn’t even know and the poor young boy who had lost his father.
“Now, it seems, he would do anything for her. His father made the ultimate sacrifice in the name of love, and Loch would do the same, I suppose. Which, by my guess, is why he is refusing to love you,” Seamus said, his mouth twisted in sadness.
Spear Song Page 13
