To Date A Disaster (Southern Sanctuary - book 6)

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To Date A Disaster (Southern Sanctuary - book 6) Page 26

by Jane Cousins


  But there would be more than just temperamental clashes between them, and she wasn’t just thinking about the fantastic sex. There would be laughter, sharing meals and talking. Building a life together, making memories.

  “I can get distracted too. When I’m deep into a research project. I’ll ignore you. Forget to clean… forget to cook, not that I really can cook, nothing edible anyway.” She warned, digging her nails in to her palms in order to keep a straight face.

  Erik smiled, unconcerned. “We can hire a cleaner and eat take-away. And if I’m feeling ignored I’ll just play with my statue here until you come panting my way looking for relief.”

  Cara fought not to roll her eyes, he was adorable when he was being arrogant. “I’m not changing my wardrobe to please you, I have to wear practical clothes to work.”

  “Promise?” Erik looked sincerely delighted at the thought.

  “And I’ll probably get fat. I mean, I’m rounded now but as I get older…”

  Erik’s eyes dropped to her breasts and again he said, “… promise?”

  “You.” Cara shook her head. Honestly, she suspected they would spend so much time having sex, fighting and then indulging in make-up sex that she would probably end up fitter than she’d ever been. “And if we do have babies… children, I’m still going to want to work. Don’t think I’ll stay at home and be your baby making machine.”

  Erik’s grin widened. “I work from home, I can pitch in and let’s face it… if my mother wants grandbabies so damn bad, then the woman can bloody well help in raising them.” Erik’s grin dropped abruptly. “Say the words, Cara.”

  Cara took a deep breath, ignoring his plea, still a little too miffed that he was trying to back her into a corner without him saying the words first. “And I’m going to want to fill the house with hanging pot plants… large, heavy, metal hanging pot plants.”

  Erik quirked an eyebrow upwards in query.

  “So when you piss me off… and trust me, I know you will Erik Valhalla, I intend to wave my whammy chaos finger and magic them down right on top of your thick skull.”

  Erik hesitated for a brief second, then nodded. “You’re right… that does sound reasonable. Now say the words, Angel.” He walked slowly back towards her, lifting one of her hands to brush a soft warm kiss over her knuckles. “Say the words so we can go upstairs and start our life together…”

  “In the bed Saffron was in? Naked? Waiting for you?” Cara enquired with a far from sweet smile.

  “I threw that bed out earlier today and replaced it when I bought the statue back here.”

  Cara grinned. “Well played.”

  Erik leaned over, pushing her hair out of the way so he could press soft kisses against her throat and nuzzle her ear. “Hurry up and tell me Cara. Your breasts are already whispering extremely dirty things they want me to do them. All I need to do is hear the words and I’m yours.”

  Cara gripped his hair and yanked. Staring him right in the eye. “Are you Erik? Are you mine?”

  “I love you, woman.” He growled between clenched teeth, his body aching with need for her. “What more do you want from me?”

  Cara grinned suddenly, releasing his hair to cuff him across the back of his head. “There you go…”

  “What?” He asked in genuine puzzlement.

  Cara shook her head. “Nothing. I love you…” …you big dolt. She finished the last of the sentence in her head. “Now take me upstairs and let’s start all that practicing you’ve been telling me we need.”

  Erik swept her in tight, moulding her body to his, taking off her glasses with one hand he lowered his lips onto hers, kissing her, long and hard. Raising his head eventually he stared down into her gorgeous bright sapphire eyes. “Maybe instead of heading upstairs we should go make this official, here and now. There’s probably an emergency after-hours number I can ring for the High Council, before you change your mind. I promise only a drop or two of blood is involved in the melding ceremony.”

  Cara reached up, tracing a finger over his soft bottom lip. “I swear not to change my mind, tomorrow is soon enough to make this official. As long as you refrain from saying anything stupid or jerkish between now and then.”

  Erik could read the clear mischief brimming in her eyes. “Fine with me Angel, since I’m so much better with my hands than words.” He kissed her again, this time picking her up, her legs wrapping around his waist, her skirt riding high.

  Cara melted into Erik’s kiss, her heart beating fast, the ball of chaos low in her body the size of a tennis ball now thanks to the magic she’d siphoned off Sek and Mot, pulsed and swirled with excitement. It was comforting to know that if her life ever veered into disaster mode again she’d have Erik to help her survive, to help her make it through and out the other side… together.

  It was like Erik knew what she was thinking as he broke their kiss and smiled at her. “You can bring the house down on my head Angel, but you’re mine, and I’m never letting you go. Promise you’ll do the same.”

  “I promise. Even if I do bring the house down on your head, I’ll turn right around and dig your sorry ass out because I’m never letting you go either.”

  Erik laughed. “Now that sounds like true love to me… my very own walking disaster, how did I get so damned lucky?”

  Cara rolled her eyes, giving him a playful punch on the chest. “Hurry up will you, both I and my breasts are getting impatient.” She released a giddy laugh as he began to take the stairs two at a time.

  Epilogue

  Alma’s fingers froze over the keyboard as a sudden wave of rightness shot through her.

  For just a split second anyone looking into her brown eyes would have seen her pupils sparkle super bright, as if each contained a million golden stars that had all switched on at once. A self-satisfied smile titled up the edges of her lips. Oh she was good, so very, very good. A magical match-maker unparalleled. She did love when a convoluted plan came together. Self-congratulations were in order

  Under her desk she felt Puffball twine around her bare legs, his fur soft and warm. She reached down to rub him gently under the chin. “You should be home napping, Sweetheart. I’ll have work soon enough for you and your friends.” Referring to Limbo and Cicero, Puffball’s feline partners in crime.

  Absently Alma checked the clock, well after midnight, it was getting late. Once upon a time, after finalising a match, she’d race home to her husband to boast and tell him all the intricate details of how she’d managed to pull off the seemingly impossible, but now… she sighed, she’d just be going home to a dark and lonely house.

  Returning her attention to the calendar, Alma resumed making changes to her schedule. It was such a delicate balancing act… the match-making business. It wasn’t just about ensuring that fate bought two people in to each other’s orbit and hey presto – love! If only, it were that simple.

  No, each journey to love involved a myriad of moments. Hundreds of factors that tipped and swayed the emotional balance of the potential lovers involved in her match up. A simple crack in the pavement could make or break all the links in the chains she had set up to lure the reluctant potential life-mates together.

  Alma frowned at the colour coded chart in front of her, she was juggling twenty-five or more matches currently, it was getting out of hand, not to mention she was running out of colours.

  Something caught her eye and she followed the sequence of purple notations… no, no, if that happened, then that would result in… oh, no, that would be far too dangerous.

  She heaved a sigh and commenced hitting the delete button. This was happening all too often of late, the dangerous spikes and sudden out of control elements that were emerging in the patterns… the confluence of events with each match getting murkier, to the point she was practically micro-managing each and every detail, but even then, unforeseen… potentially deadly events kept happening. Hadleigh’s near death experience. Berry getting shot.

  How had she failed to take into
account what the addition of Maat’s warriors to the family would do to the Sanctuary grid?

  There was only three currently in the mix, but more were scheduled to follow… what would be the consequences of all seven joining? Already several of the older members of the family had mentioned their magic was acting unexpectedly. Spells stronger and with unusual results.

  Alma feared the influence of the warriors’ presence wouldn’t just stop with magic spikes. She had the distinct feeling that the coming generation of babies to be born in the Sanctuary would have stranger, more unexpected powers than the family had witnessed in years… hah, and she was adding Apep, the God of Chaos’ bloodline into the mix. She was bone deep certain that addition wasn’t going to make her match making job any easier.

  But then, if she’d wanted easy, well, she would never have resumed the mantle of Southern Sanctuary match-maker, would she?

  Sighing, she tried her best to shake off her doubts. It was good, the input of power was undeniably good. Her brother, Ward, who headed up the High Council was giddy with elation. His plan to manipulate her in to returning as the family match-maker had produced results already, ten-fold his expectations.

  Everyone in the community benefitted from a strong and healthy grid. But she couldn’t seem to make Ward understand what a dangerous path they’d started down. How the sudden uptick of power in the grid was affecting her ability to match-make… safely.

  Damn, even the small inconsequential steps she put into action, the tweaks, the prods… they all had to be carefully monitored now so that they wouldn’t trigger something disastrous or deadly.

  Hmmm, for the first time in a long time she was grateful that there was no one waiting anxiously at home for her, looks like it was going to be another all-nighter. Ah, how well she knew that the price one too often had to pay for love was a steep one.

  She only hoped, as she scanned the journey ahead for each of her beloved candidates, that none of them would be forced to pay more than they could afford to lose.

  Love… it really was the most dangerous game of all.

  The End

  About the Author

  Jane Cousins is a not so mild mannered IT Project Manager by day. Her greatest working achievement has been to perfect ‘the silent glare of promised retribution’ that encourages her team to meet their promised deadlines. Over the years her job has taken her all around the world, requiring she live in the UK, China and Singapore. Now settled in Melbourne, Australia, she has adopted the night time persona of author. Which generally involves donning a silk mask, hunching over a computer and fighting in the name of alpha males and their more than a match female counterparts everywhere.

  A huge fan of witty banter and smoking hot instant attraction, Jane has never let the facts or inconvenient reality interfere with the telling of a great story. Currently she is hard at work on book 7 of the Southern Sanctuary Series – To Shackle A Shrew – to be released Oct 2015.

  If you liked this book please rate/write a review on Amazon.

  If you want to keep up to date, read my blog, ask me questions or read reviews of books I’ve read recently, then log onto Goodreads and become a fan.

  Or you can follow me on twitter: Jcousins_author

  Books by Jane Cousins;

  Southern Sanctuary series:

  To Woo a Warrior

  To Trap a Temptress

  To Wrangle a Witch

  To Seduce A Siren

  To Bedevil A Beauty

  To Date A Disaster

  To Shackle A Shrew (coming Oct 2015)

  By the Numbers series:

  One For The Wedding

  Two For The Show

  Three For The Bank Job

  To Woo a Warrior

  (Book One – Southern Sanctuary)

  It was common knowledge that Hadleigh Valhalla was a complete failure when it came to men. Too blood thirsty. Too tall at 6.6ft and without a coy bone in her too voluptuous body. If there had been a ‘fun, flirty and feminine’ test she would have failed it hands down.

  Thankfully she was much more suited to her role as an Enforcer, protecting her magically enhanced eccentric extended family on a daily basis from all kinds of nasties. It was a job she loved, much preferring to be out there beheading the baddies than dating any day of the week … much less stressful.

  Except now there’s a new threat in town. Great Aunt Alma, the family match maker has returned to the fold and set her sights squarely on all the singletons. Hadleigh will do anything she has to in order to avoid Alma’s matchmaking manoeuvres, even if that means signing on as the newest member of the hit reality TV show ‘Paranormal Exterminators.’

  Vaughn, Captain of the Goddess Maat’s elite warriors has a mission, to find and annihilate any and all magical beings that threaten to tilt the scales of justice into chaos.

  A paranormal reality TV show provides the perfect cover. But there’s trouble on set. Their only female cast member has gone missing and they need a replacement fast. Enter Hadleigh Valhalla, the most luscious thing on two legs he’s seen in a century. From the moment he sets eyes on her he’s determined to make her his.

  There’s only one problem, Hadleigh insists she has a strict no dating policy. Claiming she’d rather be fighting than flirting.

  A series of mishaps means it’s a race against time for Vaughn and Hadleigh to discover just who is targeting the show and stop them before someone gets seriously hurt or dead. While doing so Vaughn intends to teach Hadleigh to break all the rules and prove to her she is just as much woman as she is warrior.

  His warrior. His woman.

  To Trap a Temptress

  (Book Two - Southern Sanctuary)

  What Nell needs is a man - a completely shocking, ridiculously inappropriate, insanely unsuitable, ludicrously improper man.

  Considered too vanilla in a world full of flavours Doctor Nell Montgomery’s dating life is a barren waste land with few prospects on the horizon. Tired of being labelled the nice girl, she’s decided she needs a life make-over stat. With that in mind she instigates a bold plan to shatter her nice girl image irretrievably. All she needs is one shockingly inappropriate man. When she does find him she intends to seduce the heck out of him and bury her goody two shoes reputation once and for all.

  There’s only one seven foot tall problem standing in her way. His name is Drum, an elite warrior in the Goddess Maat’s guard. He’s spent over a hundred years killing magical nasties in the most vile, bloodiest manner possible – and quite frankly enjoying the hell out of himself. With a reputation as the big bad, Drum is used to dangerous women throwing themselves at him. What he isn’t prepared for is one gorgeous Doctor who challenges and tempts him at every turn.

  When the baddest of the bad and the sweetest of the sweet are thrown together on a tropical island with a nameless, faceless danger stalking Nell, it’s up to Drum to protect her and at the same time prove to his little temptress that she’s the perfect not so nice woman for him.

  To Wrangle A Witch

  (Book Three – Southern Sanctuary)

  Serena Chastain, former reality TV - sparkly purple shorts wearing – starlet, and Earth Witch is having a really bad five months. Imprisoned in a mental facility by two Chaos demi-gods bent on revenge, Serena is drained of her magic and only days away from dying.

  Truth Mage Locke Valhalla battles evil every day… in the boardroom, wielding the contents of his briefcase like a sword, his platinum credit card his shield. His life is pretty much perfect. He’s established very firm boundaries to ensure his loving but interfering family are kept at bay and his immaculate home is the equivalent of the fortress of solitude – only much cleaner and better decorated with a big screen TV plus an expensively stocked bar.

  Unfortunately Locke’s perfect world is about to come crashing down. Blackmailed into rescuing Serena, what’s a three piece suit wearing corporate lawyer with a slight dirt phobia supposed to do when he’s saddled with an Earth Witch with a bounty on her ve
ry fine - but definitely off limits – ass? A woman who insists upon rolling around in the mud to reconnect with her magic! A woman who refuses to wear clothes and seems to take great delight in twitching all her mouth-watering assets in his face at every opportunity!

  With a Kiss of Vampire Assassins also chasing that very fine butt, it’s up to Locke to protect Serena from the bad guys whilst the Earth Witch teaches him that only good things come to those who are willing to wrangle with a Witch.

  To Seduce A Siren

  (Book Four – Southern Sanctuary)

  Being a Siren sucked! Charisse Bright could attest to that. Admittedly, the supernatural package came with a face/body to die for and the ability to manipulate others with her stunning voice, but there’s a major downside to being a songstress of the high seas and she wasn’t just talking about the never-ending compliments, the incessant flattery or the drooling… ick, the drooling!

  No, she had a deep, dark secret. Being a Siren meant bonding with a possessive, bitchy and hungry… oh, so very hungry, rock.

  Charisse has enough on her plate dealing with the demanding bitch-rock on top of her extensive, magical, high-maintenance family. The last thing she needs in her life is a man. One who keeps scowling at her rather than flirting, kissing her one moment, insulting her the next. And worst of all, he appears to be completely an utterly immune to her Siren powers.

  No, the last thing she needs in her life is an uncontrollable, annoying man.

  Women! Women of all shapes and sizes love Maat warrior and world-class superflirt, Nate, but after a hundred years of flirting - with the best of intentions - Nate is kind of weary of the whole meaningless dating scene. He wants a relationship, with a nice, easy-going, uncomplicated woman. Problem is, the two women currently in his life, couldn’t be more different, or problematic.

 

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