Darcy, for his part, was indeed moved by Saint Paul’s words, as they seemed to speak directly to him. He took the passage as one more sign that he needed to change his behavior. But, rather than simply be reminded of his shortcomings, the verse gave him hope. The passage ended with a declaration of the power of love, with the intonation, “Love always hopes, always trusts, always perseveres. Love never fails.” Whatever his other flaws, he knew he truly loved Elizabeth, and if that was the case, it was not unreasonable for him to hope.
As the parishioners were asked to pray on the generosity of their own spirit, she watched as Mr. Darcy knelt, deep in thought. She wondered what he was thinking about so intently. As she examined his kneeling form, she realized she had never really looked at him closely before. She noticed how broad his back and shoulders appeared in his finely tailored coat. While she always knew he was wealthy and could afford the most flattering cut for his garments, she had never noticed before that his physique required no such enhancement. Nor had she noticed how curly his black hair was. She chastised herself for having such thoughts while she was supposed to be at prayer, but her vantage point made concentration on anything else impossible. She watched as Mr. Darcy bent his head and shoulders farther forward. She thought how different he looked than she would have expected, as he continued to kneel, oblivious to his surroundings.
As most of the members of the congregation, including Mr. Bingley, took their seats to indicate they had finished their prayers, Mr. Darcy continued to kneel. She wondered once again what so preoccupied him, and thought that he looked anything but proud at that moment. Finally, before Mr. Darcy’s inattention became embarrassing, she noticed Mr. Bingley gently nudge Mr. Darcy’s elbow with his leg. Mr. Darcy looked up, startled, and then sank back in his seat. As he moved, Elizabeth instinctively bowed her head toward his back to keep out of his peripheral view. By doing so, she found herself very close to the backs of the two gentlemen’s heads as they exchanged whispers.
With his eyes staring straight ahead, Bingley leaned ever so slightly toward Darcy and quietly said, “Sorry, but I thought you might have fallen asleep on your knees. Or were you having an epiphany?”
From the side of his face, she saw Darcy suppress a smile, as he replied, “No, I was simply lost in thought. I can see why it confused you, though, since I know you never contemplate an idea for longer than a minute.”
“My ideas are obviously more well formed than yours. As such, they don’t require labored contemplation.”
“It shows.”
The two men then gave each other a discreet smile and turned their attention back to the altar. As Elizabeth attempted to do the same, she had to smile at their easy camaraderie. She could not help but imagine what they were like as boys, and pictured them being caught by the schoolmaster for speaking out of turn.
As the minister directed the congregation to the page for the final hymn, she noticed that it was one of her favorites. She watched as Darcy found the page and then closed his book. He apparently knew the song well. As the tenor and bass parts began the song, she had the guilty pleasure of listening to the men in front of her sing. She was surprised by the resonance and strength of Mr. Darcy’s voice. As she listened, she had to admit to herself that he had many appealing attributes. She wondered, if she had not been so blinded by Mr. Wickham’s lies, whether she would have found it more difficult to refuse Darcy. She laughed at herself for even considering it and tried to concentrate on the song lest she miss her part. As her own strong voice chimed in at the chorus, she saw Mr. Darcy flinch and then heard him falter as he began to turn around and then stopped himself midstream. She thought it unlikely, but she almost believed that he had recognized her voice. Unwilling to be caught watching him, she decided to leave immediately at the close of service.
As soon as the music stopped, Darcy turned around. He knew Elizabeth must have been standing behind him. Her singing voice, like everything else about her, was deeply committed to his memory, as it was a familiar part of his nightly dreams. But when he turned, there was only an empty space at the end of the aisle. As he exited the church, he could see that she was not in the courtyard, so he stationed himself at the door to watch the parishioners leave the church. As the Bennet party exited, he was surprised to see Elizabeth in line behind Jane. He knew she had not been at the front of the church during the service but could not explain her appearance there now.
Bingley was more than happy to stand at the door with Darcy, as it meant he would have another opportunity to talk to Jane. As Mrs. Bennet approached, Mr. Bingley told her how much he had enjoyed Reverend Fischer’s sermon. She readily agreed that it was one of the best she had heard and began explaining the history of his service to their parish. As their other sisters began to converse with the Lucases, Darcy took the opportunity to say good morning to Jane and then Elizabeth. Darcy then looked directly at Elizabeth and asked if she had enjoyed the service.
With a slight smile upon her lips, she replied, “Yes, indeed I did, sir. I found it very enlightening.”
“I am glad to hear it.” He then impulsively added, “I did not see you come in though.”
Smiling all the more sweetly, she said, “You did not? Are you certain?”
Looking at her intently, he replied, “Yes, I am quite sure.”
“Oh, that is odd.” By way of clarification, she raised one eyebrow and finally added, “There is a side door by the front of the church.”
He continued to stare at her, hoping to gain further intelligence. She simply smiled back, unwilling to say more. They were clearly at a standstill. Neither was willing to ask what the other was trying to say or not say, and neither would look away. Despite his lack of progress at unraveling this mystery, Darcy felt it a pleasant sensation. He wondered why she would have moved if she were, in fact, sitting behind him, and wondered, all the more, why she would now be reluctant to reveal it. His pessimistic side worried that it was an attempt to avoid him at all costs, but her present playful demeanor seemed to suggest otherwise. No, this was clearly a game of sorts, and he was thrilled that she was willing to let him play.
The stalemate, however, ended too quickly as Mrs. Bennet’s loud voice was heard inviting Mr. Bingley to dinner and then nervously adding, “Mr. Darcy, you are also welcome.”
Darcy slowly tore his eyes from Elizabeth. “Thank you, madam, I would be honored.”
***
As Darcy entered the library, he saw that Bingley, who was also already dressed for dinner, was deep in thought while drafting a letter. “Charles, you look busy; do not let me disturb you. Call me whenever you are ready to leave. I am at your service.”
Tearing himself from the page he had just written, Bingley replied absentmindedly, “Um, yes… Thank you.” Then looking up he said, “Actually, Darcy, perhaps I could impose upon you for some advice. I should discuss this with you in any event, as it concerns you.”
“By all means, what can I do?”
“The invitation to the Bennets’ tonight has made me realize that I will soon need to return the courtesy. Obviously, I will need someone to act as a hostess for me. I have been putting off dealing with Caroline or Louisa until I had settled matters with Miss Bennet, but I now think that was a mistake. Whenever I visit with Miss Bennet, I feel that she is on the verge of forgiving me for leaving last fall. I think she hesitates, however, because she cannot forget my sisters’ objections to the match. The only way for her to overcome her reservations is for my sisters to return and show her that they will accept her into my family. I have been attempting to draft a letter to Caroline to invite her here, but I am having trouble wording it. I have tried to explain how I feel about Miss Bennet, and everything that has happened since I returned from Scarborough, but it is already four pages long, both sides, and a hopeless muddle. I think I should start over, but I simply do not know where to begin.”
“Charles, I am not sure what help I can be. They are your sisters. You should tell them how you feel an
d let them know what you want. If I may be frank, I think, at times, they take advantage of your good nature by tending not to accede to your wishes. It is important to maintain a cordial relationship with them, but you should also be clear about what you expect of them in regard to Miss Bennet.”
“I suppose you are right,” Bingley conceded. “I have always avoided conflict with them because it is easier to keep the peace than engage in a battle of wills. But their reception of Miss Bennet and her family is too important to leave up to chance. I think I will start the letter over and be more direct.”
“Charles, just do what you think is right. If it is only legible, it will be a vast improvement over your typical correspondence.”
“Yes, very well,” Bingley drawled. “I see that you are in a humor to make sport of me and to be of no further use, so I will drop that subject and move on to a more important one.” After a pause, he sheepishly added, “Once my sisters return, I have decided to ask Miss Bennet to marry me. I am not sure if she will agree, but I do not want to waste any more time.”
Patting Bingley on the back while warmly shaking his hand, Darcy said, “Charles, I think that is wonderful. I wish you every success.”
“Thank you, Darcy. I appreciate the encouragement. That, however, brings to mind another issue that I want to discuss with you. Earlier, you said you would make some decisions about your plans after you attended church. You certainly did enough soul searching during the service to be familiar with your own mind. Have you made a decision?”
“To be honest, no—not completely.”
“You should seriously think about staying on here. But when you decide, be aware of my invitation to Caroline. I know she sometimes makes you ill at ease. More importantly, once she is here, it is my wish to invite the Bennets on a regular basis. I worry that some of their party might also make you uncomfortable.”
“Charles, thank you for being so considerate of my feelings. I am not sure what I want to do, but I appreciate your invitation more than you know. Would you mind if I slept on the decision?”
Smiling broadly, Bingley replied, “Not at all. But I have a suspicion that you are actually looking for your answer tonight at Longbourn and that sleeping on it has nothing to do with it.”
Darcy looked away and then could not help but smile at his friend in return as he said, “It is a good thing that you are so friendly and good-natured. It fools most people into thinking that you are simpleminded. It allows you to observe the world unencumbered. Very little gets by you, though, and most people never recognize it.”
Bingley replied with a small laugh, “If that was a compliment, thank you. But, Darcy, knowing what I know, I would be a fool not to have noticed your improved disposition after church today and connected it to Miss Elizabeth. I have not seen you in such a good mood in months. Will you tell me what has happened to cause such a transformation?”
“Actually, absolutely nothing has happened. That is why I want to see how things go tonight. I suppose I am in an optimistic mood because it seemed she was not so uncomfortable in my presence this morning. In saying it out loud, I realize how pathetic that sounds, but that meager morsel has allowed me to nurture the unrealistic hope that I might be able to befriend her. If I do, perhaps in time she can forgive me.”
“Darcy, I think that is wonderful. My only desire is to see you happy. I think the advice you gave me about pursuing Miss Bennet applies equally well in your case. Let us face the evening with high hopes. I will be ready in just a few moments, and I will meet you in the foyer.”
After his friend left, Bingley scribbled the following missive without a single inkblot:
Dear Caroline,
I recently learned that Miss Bennet visited you last winter and that you returned the call without telling me of either event. I have been courting Miss Bennet since my return to Netherfield. I request that you immediately join me here so that you can host Miss Bennet and her family. We can discuss the continuation of your allowance at that time. You should bring Louisa, as I expect both of my sisters to extend every courtesy to my intended fiancée and her family.
Your loving brother,
Charles
Chapter 11
RIVALS
As the gentlemen rode to Longbourn in Bingley’s carriage, each contemplated the evening before him with a mixture of hope and trepidation. Darcy was buoyed by Elizabeth’s reception of him after church, but he knew full well that he had misjudged her moods in the past with disastrous results. He knew that he would have to learn how to navigate social occasions if he wanted to win her regard. He was just unsure of his skill in such situations. Whatever his ability, the first step toward obtaining his goal was refraining from imagining every pitfall. He needed to try to act naturally in Elizabeth’s presence, without being on guard and without giving offense. He thought it a daunting prospect and searched for a distraction. Speaking more abruptly than he wished, Darcy turned to Bingley and asked, “Did you finish your letter?”
Bingley, who was deep in thought, turned to Darcy with a vacant gaze, obviously trying to comprehend his meaning. “Oh… um, yes, I sent it off by express before we left. I asked Caroline, in a direct fashion, to come to Netherfield to receive Miss Bennet. I told her to bring the Hursts as well.”
“That seems a wise course of action.”
“Yes, but the difficulty will begin once they arrive.”
With a sympathetic smile, Darcy replied, “That may be.”
“I have been trying to decide what I should say to Miss Bennet. Tonight, if I have an opportunity to speak with her alone, I thought I would tell her about my invitation to Caroline and Louisa, and then ask her if she will agree to let them call on her. I am not sure my sisters deserve a second chance, but I think the only way for Miss Bennet to accept my regard is for her to see that my sisters will receive her with the civility she deserves.”
“I think you are right in that regard. But I would not worry. Miss Bennet has a very forgiving temperament. I think if your sisters apply themselves, she will receive them with her usual grace. How will you know, however…? How can you be sure…?”
“That my sisters will behave in her presence? I am not, but I intend to make it crystal clear to them that I expect no less.”
Smiling at his friend’s sudden assertiveness, Darcy offered, “If I can be of service to you in any way, please tell me.”
“Thank you. I will keep that in mind. And what of you? What do you hope to accomplish this evening?”
“Charles, you have a plan of action to win Miss Bennet and a concrete goal that you wish to obtain. I am simply appraising the situation. I have no realistic chance of achieving what I desire. At this point, I simply hope to dine without giving offense.”
With a broad grin, Bingley replied, “Do not be so pessimistic, Darcy. With a little effort that sounds like an obtainable goal.”
Darcy simply chuckled and stared out the window as the carriage pulled up to the entrance of Longbourn.
As the gentlemen entered, Mrs. Bennet greeted them with every courtesy. Her usual brash manner, however, was somewhat in retreat. She had invited Mr. Bingley to dinner on the spur of the moment, after he had been so pleasant to her at church. She included Mr. Darcy in the invitation when she realized that neglecting him might unintentionally give offense. The fact that the gentlemen were now calling together posed a particularly complex problem for her to solve. She knew that one of them should marry Jane and that it was her job to see that it happened, but she was unsure which man she should instruct Jane to encourage. Mr. Bingley seemed both more willing and more pleasant, but his wealth was nothing in comparison to Mr. Darcy’s. She suspected that Mr. Darcy’s aunt had discouraged his interest in Jane more than he would admit. As such, she worried that he might never come around. If that were the case, she could not have Jane wasting her attentions on him at the risk of offending Mr. Bingley. But then again, the chance of securing Mr. Darcy, with all of his wealth, could not be ignored.
It was a difficult problem indeed.
As they entered the parlor, Mr. Bingley noticed that a seat near Jane was unoccupied. Leaving Darcy to fend for himself, Bingley quickly resumed his place by Jane’s side. Darcy smiled good-naturedly at his friend. He could not blame Bingley for deserting him; he would do the same if the situation were reversed. Darcy scanned the room for Elizabeth and attempted to hide his disappointment when he realized she was not present. Darcy set about paying his respects to Mr. Bennet, who received him with an air of indifference. Darcy then acknowledged Sir William, who received the compliment of his attention with far more fanfare. As Darcy moved away to stand slightly apart from Sir William and his wife, Jane called to him.
“Mr. Darcy, how good it is to see you. Would you join us?”
Darcy smiled appreciatively to her. “Thank you, madam. Are you sure I am not intruding?”
Mr. Darcy and the Secret of Becoming a Gentleman Page 13
