Oh, God. Rio. She was already thinking and planning and wasn’t sure how he’d fit into those plans.
“I don’t know if I want to leave Rio.” She loved him, but now she felt torn between helping her family or exploring something with him.
Her mother squeezed her hand. “You could ask him to come with you.”
She shook her head. “He has his foundation there, his work. He has a life there. A legacy there.” Would he leave his life for her? Could she ask him to?
“You don’t think he would go with you?” her mother asked.
“I—I’m not sure.”
Her parents exchanged glances again.
Her father cleared his throat. “I think it’s time to meet him.”
“What?”
“Bring the prince back here. We’ll talk. I won’t mention Brazenbourg unless you do, but we’ll talk nonetheless.”
She gave him a wary look as she thought of her brothers’ initial response to Rio. “You’re not going to be mean to him, are you?”
Her father quirked a brow. “I will be ever genial to a visiting royal from another country, as always.”
“Alex tried to kill him.”
Her mother sighed. “How bad?”
“Choked him a little.”
Her father’s mustache twitched, and Sarah thought it was hiding a smirk. “Well, no harm done then.”
“Papa!”
“My child, we are your parents; our first thought is always to protect you, even if you don’t feel you need it. Your brothers—Alex in particular—feel the same way. There’s nothing he wouldn’t do to help you or keep you safe.”
“I know, but you didn’t answer my question. You won’t try to kill him, will you?”
He didn’t answer.
“Papa…”
He chuckled—chuckled!—as he walked over again, then leaned down to kiss her forehead. “Go and get the prince. I will be on my most respectful behavior, I promise.”
She narrowed her eyes but took him at his word. Her father didn’t make idle promises, not to the family nor to the public.
She headed back, the sounds of her family growing louder as she approached the foyer again. Hadn’t they at least shown him to a sitting room? God, she hoped they hadn’t done something else to him.
When she reached the edge of the foyer, she paused to listen to her family.
Alex’s voice had gone that soft, loving tone it did for Rebecca. “I was never going to really hurt him,” Alex said to his wife. “None of us were. We just wanted to put a little fear into him.”
“Papa will be doing that plenty, I’m sure.” Sarah walked over to Rio and took his hand. The simple touch filled her with a burst of warmth, as though she’d just stepped into the sun from a cold shadow.
“My father’s ready for you.”
He nodded. She began tugging him, but he held her back a moment and faced her family.
“You’ve given me your word you won’t harm me further, and you’ve apologized. If I had a sister like Sarah, I would have likely done the same in your position. However, something you may want to consider is that everything Sarah is facing as a part of this scandal, I’m facing as well. I’d never let anything harm Sarah, be it the press or a person, and even if that person is me.”
He didn’t wait for a response and walked off, this time tugging her along with him.
When they were out of earshot of her family, she glanced over at him. “That was a very nice thing you just said.”
He paused, turned, and cupped her cheek. “I meant it.”
She gave him a small smile. “I know.” His hair was a little unruly and she couldn’t resist combing her fingers through it.
An indiscernible expression coated his face. “Am I presentable?”
He was slightly rumpled—they’d had to change in a hurry after the ball—but still sexy.
God, so sexy.
He was dressed in a classic black suit fitted to his disciplined frame. His pale green shirt was enticingly unbuttoned at the top, revealing a hint of the chest hair underneath.
She had a sudden urge to rip his shirt open and run her hands over his chest. She took a breath and tamped the urge. After they met with her father, she’d take Rio back to her suite of rooms and have her way with him. Oh, yes, she would.
Though, even with his sex drive, he may not want that after she discussed Brazenbourg and all that could mean to them and their future.
She’d worry about that later. For now, she focused on her father meeting the man she loved.
Though, she couldn’t resist teasing Rio a little before they did. “Yes, you’re very presentable. In fact, after we’re finished with my father, I’m going to make you very unpresentable.”
He scowled. “You can’t say shit like that to me when I’m about to meet your father.”
She smiled innocently. “Like what?”
He yanked her roughly into his arms, and damn if that didn’t cause tingles to scatter across her body.
His voice was gruff and low, his lips a breath from hers. “You want me hard while I meet your father? You want me imagining myself as I pound into you, fuck you until you can’t breathe, while I’m meeting the king of Valleria? Is that what you want?”
The tingles deepened to a throb. “God, yes.”
He walked her back against a wall, one hand roaming along her side, the other fisting in her hair and angling her head just so. “Should I make you orgasm right here, against the wall of the Royal Palace? Should I fill the halls with the sounds you make, the breathy little catches, the gut-wrenching moans, the way you pant my name when you’re close?”
God, she loved his dirty talk. “Rio.”
He buried his head against her neck and took a deep breath, then another. He pressed a soft kiss to her pulse and leaned back, his eyes now clear. “Don’t rile me up, bella. I’ll fight back, and I won’t fight fair.”
“Good.”
His lips tipped up. “Good?”
She fisted the lapels of his jacket and brought his body flush against hers. She loved the feel of him against her. “I like it when you don’t fight fair.”
He brushed a finger down her cheek. Why that simple touch sent shivers through her, she didn’t know. “I’ll keep that in mind.”
“I am sorry for giving you dirty thoughts.”
“Are you?”
“Yes. I only meant to distract you a little. I know you’re worried about meeting my father, but you needn’t be.”
His hand relaxed in her hair, and he combed it through with his fingers. “Was he harsh with you?”
She shook her head. “Worried, but not harsh.”
“Disappointed then.”
A stone sank in her gut. “Yes.”
“That’s worse, isn’t it? The disappointment.”
She blinked. She didn’t think anyone else ever thought that but her. “Yes, it is. You know about this?”
A rueful smile crossed his face. “I know all about disappointing my parents. It seems to be my lifelong goal, according to them.”
Her heart ached for him. “Their disappointment doesn’t matter. They don’t matter.”
“I know. Don’t worry, bella. I’ll be fine. Come on. I don’t want to keep your father waiting.”
“Papa won’t act that way. He’s different.”
He chuckled. “Of that, I’m sure.”
“Oh?”
“The way you are, the way your siblings are…of course your family is much different than mine.” A sad, resigned expression crossed his face.
“Papa won’t hurt you.”
“Perhaps.”
“He won’t. I made him promise after what Alex did.”
He shook his head and brought her hand to his lips for a kiss. “Bella, there are many ways to hurt another person. Physical pain is just one of them.”
She pondered that as she led him through hallways that seemed not to end, filled with closed doors on either side. Eventually,
they found their way into a large common or family room, and it looked lived in, not for show. Sarah had always loved the Royal Wing. It may have gilded moldings and marbled floors covered with lush, expensive rugs but, to her, it was home. Warm and friendly, and full of fond memories. They were a family thrust into the spotlight that cared for each other, liked spending time with each other.
Recalling what she knew of his family, she realized he had no idea what that felt like. She had a strong urge to show him what a loving family was, how they could irritate each other beyond reason but still love one another through it all.
They strode further into the depths of the Royal Wing, eventually stopping several feet away from her father’s office.
When she was younger, Sarah had never really stopped to consider how lucky she was in regard to her family. Yes, they were loud, definitely annoying, and her brothers had tried to mildly injure her and her sisters’ boyfriends before. However, they were also most assuredly loving. She hadn’t known that all families weren’t like that until she’d become a teenager. She’d been shocked to learn that all royal families weren’t like this, either. Stiff and stuffy, formal and firm…royal life—life in general, really—was too difficult not to have love and kindness and laughter mixed in with the rest of it.
Seeing Rio’s family, and really comparing her own to them, had once again reminded her how she’d hit the family jackpot.
“Ready?” she whispered.
He nodded.
She gave his hand a squeeze, and together they walked into her father’s office, hand-in-hand.
* * *
Rio couldn’t believe how well it had gone with the king. Sarah’s father was probing and clearly protective of his daughter, but very gracious. The queen as well.
Another test passed.
They walked back to Sarah’s rooms, her royal apartment inside the palace. She was quiet, but he could tell she’d been pleased with how things had gone.
Once inside her rooms, he took over. He whirled her in his arms and pressed her against the door. He took her mouth until she was weak and wanting, then pulled back.
“Bedroom,” he ordered.
She shook her head against the door. “We…we have to talk.”
Talk. She wanted to talk. “Now?”
“Yes. It’s very important. About our future.”
Shit. What had happened? “All right. Lead the way.”
She nodded, then pushed away from the door and led him into a sitting room. “Do you want a drink?”
“No.”
“Coffee or tea?”
“No, Sarah. Just tell me.”
She sat down and rubbed her hands up and down her thighs, clearly nervous. “My father has a solution to our…my problems.”
The hairs on the back of his neck stood up. “Oh?”
“It seems the prime minister didn’t believe we were a couple last night.”
“We are a couple.”
“I know.”
His body was tight and unnaturally still. “And?”
She told him about her father’s plan. She’d resign her post, she’d leave Italy and work in Brazenbourg.
A country in northern Europe, far away from him.
He didn’t say a word. He waited while she spoke. He didn’t give a single response or display any emotion.
It took everything he had to resurrect the shields he’d taken down for her. Every moment of her explanation was used to build them up again. He had to—otherwise, she’d see him crumbling inside.
She was pacing, gesturing with her hands, trying her best to convince him that this was the right thing to do. “The best thing about this is that I’d be helping my family by doing this.”
Family. She was about to embark on a potentially dangerous mission that could last years. She’d be leaving her post behind, Italy behind.
Him behind.
His chest was tight. “It sounds like you’ve already made your decision.”
Her voice was almost a plea. “I haven’t. I wanted to talk to you, to see if you’d come with me. I know if you came with me you’d be giving everything up, your business, and potentially your legacy, and—”
“You think my coming with you would be giving everything up?” How wrong she was.
She was the everything he needed.
She was the everything he wanted.
However, maybe he wasn’t the same to her. The old doubts came creeping back. A lifetime of feeling unworthy couldn’t be erased in a few days, even if they were in love. He believed she loved him.
Yet, maybe she didn’t love him enough.
“Or maybe we can do a long-distance relationship. It won’t be easy. We both have full lives, but if we try it, we can do it.”
Try. Was she placating him only to break up with him later? Or was she sincere? Had his family’s blackmail attempt forced her to this decision?
He had a duty as well, to his people. He may not be the crown prince yet, but his work had meaning. For a long time, it was the only thing in his life that had meant anything. And he wouldn’t renege on that legacy and leave it to his brothers. He owed his family nothing, but his ancestors, well, he couldn’t ignore the duty he had to them.
Was it fair for Sarah to ask him to give up his life?
Was it fair for him to ask Sarah to give up this opportunity to help her family?
His voice was surprisingly hard; apparently, not all his emotions were in check yet. “Let me ask you this: Do you think once we’ve been together for some time, and if we were officially engaged, would you ever choose me over your family? Live in Italy with me, and build a legacy there with me?”
She took a deep breath. Then another. Then another.
Her hesitation said it all, didn’t it?
“I see.”
“Rio, I—”
He didn’t want to ask the question for fear of the answer. “Do you love me?”
There were tears in her eyes, but this time she didn’t hesitate. “Yes.”
“I love you, but I wonder if I’ll ever be enough for you.”
She rushed to him, cupped his cheeks in a desperate fury. “I love you. I want you, but I need to do this. We’ll still have time to be together. My resignation wouldn’t take effect immediately, and I’d have other loose ends to tie up before I left Italy.”
They’d had so little time together. A few days did not make a lifetime. They could, but they clearly hadn’t here.
Maybe it was because her heart was so full of love already, and she couldn’t fit more inside for him. His heart had been barren for so many years, it had been desperate for something to fill it. He’d filled it with Sarah. He was overflowing with her.
Did he love her more than she loved him? Was their love unequal? Right then, it was exactly how he felt.
A few more days or weeks or months before she resigned may never make up for that. And he’d still be heartbroken at the end of it.
He briefly considered something long-distance. Having her even a little was better than not having her at all, but would his heart agree? As the weeks and months and perhaps even years wore on, would she tire of him?
Should he take the risk again and try? He’d taken so many risks with her the last few days.
In the end, with his shields rising fast, he made his choice.
He cupped her cheek as well, memorized the beauty of her eyes and the light that surrounded her. He’d never forget the light.
“We can’t make this work, can we, bella?”
“We can try. Please.”
“You need to help your family. I understand that. I do, bella. I may not have a family I’d help, but I can understand why you need to help yours. You’re very lucky to have them.”
A tear fell down her cheek and he brushed it away.
“Please, Rio. I…I’m not ready to give you up.”
Christ, but this was hard. He had to do it. He had to be strong for her. “Neither am I, but I fear I must.”
&n
bsp; “What about the vows we made to each other? The things we’ve shared? Those meant something to me.”
“Bella, they meant everything to me. However, your life is going in a new direction. You need to see where that leads. I cannot leave my people, just as you cannot leave yours. Don’t you see? Your work could take years in Brazenbourg. Can you tell me you’d do a long-distance relationship with me for that long? Only phone calls and scheduled visits? How long before you’d tire of it? We couldn’t truly commit to each other until you were finished.”
She fisted her hands in his hair, the sting of pain welcome to keep his despair in check.
“I understand, Rio. I understand that you can’t leave Italy. And I hear what you’re saying about a long-distance relationship. I don’t agree.”
She’d realize in time this was the right thing to do. He’d never get over her, he’d always do what he could to protect her, but she’d see he was right. In time.
“But if you need to go, then go knowing that I love you.”
“I love you, too, bell’angelo.”
He kissed her forehead, then the tears on her cheeks. He pressed one last chaste kiss to her tear-stained lips. He’d remember that salty tang for the rest of his life.
He rubbed his thumb over her lips one last time. “Be well, Sarah.”
He took a deep breath, turned, grabbed his things, and walked out the door.
Chapter Thirteen
Three months later and Sarah was finally in Brazenbourg. It had been a long few months.
One week of packing up her home in Rome and turning over her post to another.
Ten weeks of intensive training by Marcello.
One week finalizing details and moving to Brazenbourg.
She’d spent the entire three months wondering about Rio and listening for any scrap of news about him. She’d tried calling, just to see how he was—because she was really fucking miserable—but she’d received no response. So, at one point, just before she left Rome for good, she’d stopped by Rio’s apartment and offices, but his apartment was vacant and his offices had been shut down and ‘relocated’, though she didn’t know where.
Where was he?
It had been the loneliest time of her life.
Now, she was sitting in the lush solarium in Brazenbourg’s Royal Palace, idly stirring her coffee, when Finn walked in.
Sarah & Vittorio (Royals of Valleria #9) Page 22
