"Do you need help finding something?" he asked.
He instantly realized his mistake; the proximity had him inhaling her scent and had done the opposite of what he wanted. Instead of distracting him, it had made his senses acutely aware of her. Suddenly hypersensitive, he needed to put some distance between his body and hers. He didn't want to scare her with his sudden reaction to her.
But he moved too late, and Kara moved too soon. The split-second difference was all it took for her to collide with him. His closeness and the huskiness in his voice had startled her, and not realizing he was standing so closely behind her, she ran backward into him. With their bodies locked flush against each other, it would have been hard for Kara to miss his arousal. He could have punched himself for not being more careful.
"Um, I was trying to find something to put some iced tea in. But, for the life of me, I can’t reach the pitcher. Not sure what I was thinking putting it up so high."
Caleb was surprised to hear her voice sounding just as husky as his. Which only added to the already sensitive situation.
"How about we skip the iced tea and sit down and talk?"
"About?"
"This, us, what’s going on between us. The obvious attraction we feel for each other."
“It’s just...I just don’t know what to do around the opposite sex.”
"I know. That’s why we should both take a few steps apart and go sit down and talk. Maybe get to know each other a little. Sound good?"
Kara didn't say anything more. She just brushed by him and made her way to the living room. With a glance over her shoulder, Caleb nearly swallowed his tongue. Her eyes were black with desire, and he knew that she wasn't sure what to do about that. Caleb knew he was treading in sensitive waters; he knew he should be careful.
"So, what do you want to talk about?"
"You. I want to know who you are, where you’ve been. What motivates you? What makes you cry?"
"I don't cry. Haven't in a long time."
"Why not? There’s nothing wrong with crying; it’s an outlet necessary to release pent-up emotions."
"You might be right. Sometimes I want to cry, sometimes I get close, my eyes fill up, but I force them back. I haven't cried since the first night Devon raped me."
"Why do you think that is?"
"I don't know. Maybe because I didn't want to show emotion; that was the reason at first. Then as the hours went on, I stopped crying because I was angry at God for letting it happen to me. Then as the hours stretched into days, I was too numb, too dehydrated to cry. After I was rescued, I cried in the hospital, cries of joy or anguish, I’m not sure which, and then I stopped. I decided I didn’t have a right to cry. I’d made it out, just a little later than I had wanted."
"You don’t cry because you don’t think you have the right to?"
"Like I said, at first, I was angry with God, then when I was spared, by God or whomever you believe in, I decided I didn't have a right to cry any longer because I made it. Every day people are abducted, and they’re not as fortunate as me."
"Just because you made it doesn’t mean you can't cry about what happened. It certainly doesn’t mean you can never cry again, that you don’t have the right to cry."
"Oh, yeah? So, when was the last time you cried? I would think with your job, you would want to cry all the time."
"Touché. I do want to cry, but with my job, I have to try to bury those emotions. I wouldn't have a life if I let the cases I work get to me, but occasionally, a case gets to me, and I go home and cry. Especially if the case involves a child."
"There are many reasons a person buries their feelings. Please try not to judge mine."
"Kara, I would never judge you. Please believe that. I just want to know you. The good and the bad."
"It really isn’t worth the effort; I'm not worth the effort." He was still trying to figure out a response to her ludicrous statement when her eyes darted from his and landed on the clock. Her shocked eyes flew to his. “Shouldn’t he be here by now?”
Caleb looked at the clock, and even though his stomach knotted, he was about to tell her not to worry, that Ethan must have been delayed, when his cell rang. For a brief second, he thought about ignoring it. Then his instincts kicked in. It had been an hour since he’d talked to Ethan; dread filled him as he hit the answer button.
"Montgomery."
"Caleb, its Bob." Caleb's stomach dropped to his knees when he heard his captain's voice. "There's been an accident."
"How bad?" he asked, not needing the captain to say who was involved.
"It’s pretty serious. Two vehicles. The other vehicle had two off-duty officers in it—both DOA. I need you to get Kara to Mercy as soon as possible. Things don't look good, so hurry." Bob paused. "And Caleb?"
"Yeah?"
"Watch your back. Preliminary witness 911 calls are indicating that he was intentionally run off the road by the two dead officers." For the third time today, he was told those three words. Watch your back.
Caleb took a deep breath and looked down at his hands, ironically fighting tears.
"What is it? What happened? Is it Ethan?" Kara fired a round of questions at him.
"We have to go. That was my captain; Ethan was in a bad accident."
"How bad?"
"I’m not going to lie to you. It doesn't look good."
Kara's face paled as she flew to her feet. Caleb could only follow her as she ran out the door, nearly setting off her new alarm. By the time he armed it, she was already in the car waiting impatiently for him.
"Do you know any details?"
"All the captain told me was that it’s serious." He handed her the shoes she had neglected to put on in her frenzy and started the car. "Kara, he may have been run off the road intentionally by two off-duty officers, both of whom are dead."
Caleb's heart broke when he heard the small whimper come from the woman sitting next to him. He wasn't sure what he could do for her at that moment. And to make matters worse, time seemed to stand still as he negotiated the roads as fast as possible to get them both there in time. Ethan had always been like a brother to Caleb. His family felt the same way.
Once they pulled up to the front of the hospital, Kara flew out of the car. She was running at a dead sprint, and Caleb had a hard time keeping up with her. Once inside, she stopped in her tracks, looked around, and as if deciding, headed to the front desk.
“Detective Ethan Vanderbilt was brought here. I would like to know his status.”
“We can’t divulge his status to you, ma’am,” the nurse at the front desk responded coldly.
“He’s my brother.”
“Why don’t you have a seat and a doctor will be out shortly to talk to you.”
"I am his power of attorney; I have the right to know his status. You are not violating anything by telling me."
"Do you have the paperwork with you?"
Caleb watched as Kara grabbed the counter, her knuckles turning white. He wasn't sure what was going on between the two women, but he knew it was a power struggle. At this point, his money was on Kara.
"Listen, Nurse…” She paused to look at her name tag, “…Abfall, I normally try to be very patient. But I’m warning you, if you don’t pull up the information I need from the little computer in front of you, there will be repercussions."
"Are you threatening me?"
"You're damn straight I’m threatening you..." Kara paused when a distinguished looking doctor approached. Even the nurse shut her mouth and looked down.
"Nurse Abfall, I will talk to you later. Dr. Vanderbilt, please come this way." The nurse behind the front desk paled and then flushed when she heard the doctor address Kara. Clearly, the nurse wasn’t expecting an audience to her rude behavior. Caleb was stunned by her attitude and surprised and proud that Kara was, indeed, a doctor. He knew she worked there, but for some reason, he’d decided she was too young to be a doctor.
“Dr. Chiglo, how is he?” she asked the grayin
g man.
“I don’t know much, but I know it doesn’t look good. They’re getting ready for surgery; he has severe head trauma and some internal damage.”
“Who’s performing the surgery?”
“Dr. Vandehei scrubbed in.”
“Good, that’s good; he’s one of the best. What can I do? Can I observe?”
“You know we can’t let you do that; you would be a liability. Just be here for him. He needs you.”
They followed the doctor to a waiting room that was already starting to fill with detectives and officers, and where they were forced to wait to hear any news.
Kara was going crazy. There had to be something she could do. She was tired of sitting in the tiny waiting room that was filled with Ethan's co-workers who all seemed genuinely concerned for him and even for her. The closeness of everyone was starting to become stifling, and she knew they meant well when they would attempt to talk to her or bring her something to drink or eat. But the bottom line was, she didn't want to talk to any of them. She wanted to hear how her brother was doing, period. It had been hours since they’d gotten the news. Hours since he had gone into surgery, and still nothing.
“Ethan never told me you are a doctor.”
Kara stopped pacing for a couple of seconds to look at Caleb, who had followed her every step with his eyes since they’d gotten to the hospital. She knew he was trying to ease some of the tension and appreciated the effort. Of all the people in the room, he was the only one who knew what she needed, and she needed, at that moment, to think of something else.
“I suppose it probably never came up.”
“What kind of doctor are you?”
“Emergency medicine. Ironically, I just accepted a job as the new attending in this ER. And, yet, here I stand not being allowed to help or do anything.”
“Impressive. Any reason why the nurse at the front desk was so rude to you?"
“I just think it might be her personality. I don’t think she knew who I am. I didn’t get to meet as many people as I wanted today; she wouldn’t have been on shift yet. If she’d known that I’m the new attending, she probably would have responded differently.”
“It seemed like she recognized you, though.”
“You think so? I didn’t recognize her.”
“Still, something was off there. Aren’t you a little young to be attending doctor of an ER? I mean, it’s impressive at such a young age. You couldn’t have become a doctor that long ago.”
“I graduated a lot longer ago than one might think. Having no social life helps those sorts of things.”
“That and an above-average IQ?” he asked. She looked at him closely, couldn’t put one past this guy. Because of her parents, Kara had always felt the need to hide her intelligence. Guys especially didn’t seem to want to be outsmarted by a woman they were interested in dating.
“That, too. I graduated with my undergrad in premed in two years. I’d started a semester late, so I told myself I was working hard so I could graduate on time. It was all just an excuse so I could drown out the memories as long as possible. When I was taking a double course load and working full-time to save up for med school, the memories were less intrusive,” she murmured. He whistled quietly.
“Double course load and working full-time. How long did that work?”
“It still works. If I keep myself busy, I don’t think about it as much. Until the night.”
“Which is why you don’t sleep.”
“Exactly.” She sighed. “I am also willing to work night shifts.”
“How long did med school take you?”
“I also finished med school in two years."
"So, not just a smart woman?"
“If you want to label it, then my IQ would be labeled above average. Does that scare you?” she asked. He looked at her, puzzled. “My IQ has scared a few men off. Mostly in high school; then after, well, other things scared them off.”
“It doesn’t scare me, but I was surprised. I mean, I realized that you are very intelligent. But premed and med school in four years. Amazing. I was still figuring out what I wanted to do after four years of college.”
“I would actually call that smarter than me. I just did what I had to do to get through the day, and that meant drive myself into the ground with courses.”
“Why didn’t you graduate high school early? I would think you were way out of the league of your classmates.”
“I could have, but my parents wouldn’t allow it. I was expected to graduate valedictorian, but not that I do it too soon. Really, I’m surprised they didn’t want me to graduate and leave sooner, they were so indifferent to me. They could have spun it to their advantage. Genius daughter. But they didn’t. I think they didn’t want their daughter to be smarter than them, and they wanted me under their thumb.”
On cue, her parents walked in, hours after everyone else, and still managing to look the ever-distraught parents.
19
Kara was sure they had some kind of reason. The cynic in her told her the reason was that they had to plant a bug in the media's ear so they’d be here when the grieving parents showed up. And Kara knew she was right, especially when the media walked in behind them. She was honestly surprised it had taken the media that long to come; their scanners must have been malfunctioning.
Kara had finally started to calm down, and then her parents showed up. She knew they didn't care about Ethan. The thought made her blood boil. One might find it hard to believe that Ethan and she came from them. If you just had the facts to look at, i.e. birth certificates and family photos, you’d know they were her parents. Kara had a similar bone structure to Ethan and her father. And Ethan looked a lot like their mother, as well, but Kara didn’t look anything like her. They were complete opposites. Ethan had platinum hair and blue eyes just like Constance Vanderbilt. Kara had auburn hair and green eyes. Her father had dark hair, but no one in their family had green eyes. Somewhere during her thoughts, Kara had missed Dr. William Chiglo enter the room.
“Dr. Vanderbilt?” Dr. Chiglo said. “Governor and Mrs. Vanderbilt.”
William Chiglo nodded curtly in her parents’ direction but never made eye contact. Much like Vanessa, William wasn’t a fan of her parents. Kara remembered a conversation ten long years ago with the beautiful older man and woman, in which the young doctors at the time had encouraged her to get away from her parents as soon as possible. Vanessa told her there was something off with them and that Kara needed to get away from them. William had agreed. Both doctors proved to be correct in their assessments and had nailed it on the proverbial head.
"William, how is Ethan?"
“He’s out of surgery and in critical, but stable condition. I won’t lie to you, Kara,” he said, deliberately addressing Kara and not her parents, “it was a surprise he made it out of surgery, and he’s not out of the woods yet. The next twenty-four hours will tell us more. Right now, it’s just wait and pray.”
Kara ignored the gasp of shock that had come from her mother. Constance Vanderbilt was a world class actress; Kara wasn’t sure if she was acting at that moment or if she was legitimately upset. It could be that she was upset; their mother was always more of a mother to Ethan than she had been to Kara, so maybe she cared. Of course, Kara was certain that wasn’t the case. In her opinion, Constance Vanderbilt only cared about four things: Constance Vanderbilt, money, power, and prestige.
“Can we go in and see him?” Kara asked. The “we” being herself and Caleb.
“Of course. But only for a few minutes.”
Kara stood back, agitated, but allowed her father and mother to go in first, even if they were the last to get there. At least she knew they would be in and out fast and then out of her hair. Not to be disappointed, they emerged less than a minute later; of course, the distraught parents. Distraught, my ass, she thought. She hung back for a second, preparing herself. Working in the ER, this wasn’t the first time she’d seen someone seriously injured after a car acc
ident, but she had to steel her nerves because she knew it would be entirely different seeing someone she loved hooked up to machines.
“Do you want to go in alone?” Caleb asked.
“No. I would like it if you came in with me. Ethan thinks of you as a brother, and I...” She stopped short of saying she needed someone there for her. Caleb put his arm around her shoulders as if he understood what she had wanted to say.
For a brief second, her legs felt like rubber, but she squared her shoulders and went into the ICU room and to Ethan’s bedside. Once standing next to him, she felt her knees go weak again, but before she could fall, Caleb pressed her body into his and held her up.
“I’m so sorry for involving you in this. If anyone should be lying in that bed fighting for their life, it should be me. My life hasn’t been much of a life, anyway. I’m not sure anyone would even miss me. But you—you would be missed. You need to get through this.” Tentatively, she took his hand and jumped when alarms sounded. Her eyes darted to the machine monitoring his heart rate.
“Oh, God, he’s coding.” She darted into the hallway. “I need a crash cart, he’s coding.” Within seconds, the room filled with doctors and nurses.
“Kara, we can take care of this. You need to give us some room,” William said as he came running into the room.
Caleb’s arm came around her slowly, and he led her into the hallway as they worked on her brother. Once in the hallway, she collapsed to her knees. Caleb followed her to the ground, holding her. She rocked back and forth, back and forth, with Caleb cocooning her in his arms. No, no, no, this can’t be happening. Please God, please do something. He’s all I have. I know I’ve questioned You in the last ten years, but please don’t take him and leave me here alone.
They knelt outside the door to Ethan’s room; her eyes remained transfixed on the room as she watched them work on Ethan. She could hear the machine signaling his heart was flatlined. And there was nothing she could do, but pray, so that’s what she did. Closing her eyes with her shoulders shaking with the effort to breathe normally, she continued to pray harder than she had ever prayed in her life, even harder than she had when she had been taken. Please, God, please don’t take him, he is an honest man. He needs to be here to do good. Please, I haven’t asked for anything in a long time. You came through for me, please come through for him. Caleb continued to hold her as she shook and rocked back and forth, pleading with a god she had thought she had given up on.
In the Night (Darkness Falls Book 1) Page 15
