Finding Myself In You

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Finding Myself In You Page 15

by Melanie J. Cole


  It’s probably a good thing that Dean didn’t tell me where she was at. Because, with the way I’m feeling right now, I’d probably go to her, tie her up, and make her come to Houston with me. Wow, I must be really fucked up, because the images in my mind of her tied up, over my shoulder, is turning me on.

  I open my closet and pull out my last bottle of Jack. It hasn’t even been opened. When I was with Taylor I didn’t need the liquor. I got drunk off of her and the things that she made me feel.

  I unscrew the lid and tip it back to my mouth.

  Motherfucker that burns!

  CHAPTER 49

  TAYLOR

  “Can’t you pass it?” I ask Merita, unable to be patient. We’re behind a huge bus, and this is taking forever.

  She throws me a look. “No, I can’t pass it, Taylor. It’s a double line.” She actually points out the window at the line, as if I’m too blind to see it.

  I begin tapping my foot impatiently. “I know it’s a double line, but this is taking forever. We’re never going to make it, if we don’t get around this damn bus.”

  I called Dad last night and he sounded so…happy. It cemented my decision. I’d all ready decided that I wanted to go to Houston with Matt. These past few weeks without him have felt like I’ve been stuck in purgatory. I’ve been miserable. I want to be his and I want him to be mine. I feel like we’re connected. It’s like I can’t breathe, when I’m not with him. It physically hurts.

  I know he’s planning on moving right after graduation. I wanted to go last night and watch him and Dean, but I didn’t have time. By the time I finally made up my mind it had been really late. I had to get all of my stuff packed.

  I relax back in my seat, when the bus finally turns off. Thank God! “Faster Merita. Or we’re going to miss him.” I urge her. I swear if she doesn’t get this thing up to speed, I’m going to reach over there and give it the gas myself.

  She increases her speed slightly and sighs. “You should have let me drive you over here last night.” She says in a reprimanding voice.

  “I all ready told you. I had to pack my stuff.” I whine.

  She just shakes her head and rolls her eyes. We’re only a couple blocks away when I start seeing taillights. Ah hell! What now?!

  “It looks like there’s been an accident.” Merita says, pointing to a small white car sitting off to the side of the road. Great! Of course there’s been an accident. That’s just the way my life seems to be going.

  That’s it. I don’t have time for this shit. I swing my door open and hop out of the car.

  “What are you doing?” Merita asks, leaning across the seat and looking up at me.

  “I’m going to go get my man.” I tell her shutting the door.

  “What about your stuff?” She calls out to me.

  “I’ll worry about that later.” I call out to her over my shoulder.

  I pump my legs as hard as I can, ignoring all of my muscle’s protests. I really need to get into shape. Maybe, Matt and I can join a gym together.

  I feel relief course over me when I see his apartment building come into view. I’ve never been so happy to see a building before. I keep my eyes focused on the front door. I’m in the home stretch. I really hope he hasn’t changed his mind about wanting me to come with him.

  I burst through the door, not even taking the time to knock. All of my adrenaline slips away as I look around at the barren apartment. There’s nothing here. I’m too late. He’s all ready left.

  I drop down onto the floor, trying to catch my breath. I don’t even try to fight the tears off. I burst out into loud sob. I’m just so tired and it’s making everything that much more intense for me. I never should have run from him. He was the best thing that ever happened to me, and I fucked it up. I feel crushed.

  “Taylor…” His hesitant voice washes over me, and I swear I feel like I’ve just been given a second chance at life. At the very least, I’ve been given a second chance at happiness.

  I turn slowly and find those beautiful caramel eyes drinking me in. Matt has his head cocked slightly and he’s looking at me like I’m some sort of hallucination. No Matt. It’s me. I’m really here.

  I take a deep steadying breath and climb up onto my feet. I quickly wipe away the tears and smile at him. “Hey Matt.”

  “What are you doing here?” He asks, taking a small hesitant step towards me.

  “I came to tell you that I’m sorry. I never should have left. If your offer still stands, I’d like to come with you to Houston.” I wring my hands as he just keeps staring at me incredulously.

  Oh no! Why isn’t he saying anything? Has he changed his mind? I wouldn’t blame him if he did. I was acting like a spoiled little brat. That’s not the person I want to be anymore.

  More silence as I stare down at the floor, completely unaware of his easing closer and closer to me.

  “Taylor,” I hear his soft voice seconds before I feel his finger beneath my chin, tilting my head up.

  I take a stuttering breath, trying to force the tears back. I can only imagine how I must look right now. I haven’t cried like this in so many years, I’m actually doing that hiccup thing. This is beyond mortifying. “It’s okay. I don’t blame you for changing your mind.” I somehow manage to force out around the huge lump that seems to have lodged itself deep in my throat. I do my best to sound ok, I really do, but my quivering raw tone has to give me away. I can see it in his eyes. Oh God, those eyes. I could get lost in those rich caramel eyes.

  He shakes his head and his lips quirk up into a sexy grin. “Is that what you think?” He asks, leaning forward so that we’re mere centimeters apart. “That I changed my mind. You have never been more wrong. I’d literally give my right hand to have you go with me.”

  I absolutely cannot take anymore. I can’t believe that I’m actually getting what I want. Me, the real me, not some fake persona that I created to fool people. Matt knows me inside and out, and I love that about him.

  I release the breath that I’d been holding. “Matt,” his name literally falls from my lips in a whisper-moan. “I love you.”

  I know this is taking a big risk. He may not feel the same way about me, but I want him to know.

  He cups my face in his large hands and crashes his lips against my own. It’s a hungry, frenzied kiss that leaves my breathless.

  “Taylor, you have no idea how long I’ve waited to hear you say that.” He presses his forehead against mine, breathing me in. “You are everything that I never thought that I could have. I know that I’ll never be good enough for you, but I swear to you, I’ll spend every day of the rest of my life, doing whatever it takes to make you happy. I fucking love you more than anything.”

  I swear that I practically melt inside knowing that this beautiful man loves me. He loves me!

  THE END

  Also available from Melanie J. Cole

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  Warning this book contains strong coarse language, explicit sexual situations, and violence. It is not recommended for readers under the age of 17.

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  Trent Evers has spent the past eight years of his life, dreaming about the same girl. He doesn’t even know her name. What he does know, is that she was there for him, on the toughest night of his life. She stayed with him, holding his hand, humming to him, until the police showed up.

  Desperate for a distraction, he drowns himself in alcohol and random girls. It’s not enough, though. When he sees her again – at a McDonalds of all places – he’s determined to make her his. He doesn’t care that she’s dating one of his frat brothers. No one is good enough for her, especially not Aaron Jones. He’s on a mission. Now, he has a new distraction! Make her remember him, and make her his.

  Unlike Trent, Karma Davis had a perfect childhood. She grew up in a loving home with her parents, and sister.

  Her life begins spiraling out of her control, th
ree months into her relationship with Aaron Jones. He’s not the person she originally thought him to be. He’s controlling and abusive to her – both physically and mentally.

  Fearing for her life, Karma makes a plan to break it off with Aaron – once and for all. But Aaron is not the type of person who can take no for an answer.

  Karma’s terrified of what Aaron will do, if he finds her. Desperate for freedom, she moves off of campus, and rearranges her entire schedule. Will all of her efforts, be enough to get rid of Aaron? She hopes so.

  When she meets her new neighbor Trent, she knows he looks familiar, but she cannot place where she knows him from. She reluctantly forms a friendship with him, but soon realizes that friendship with Trent is not enough. She wants more, but can she trust any guy after Aaron? She’s determined to try.

  What do you do when you’re overweight, and don’t have any friends? When your own mom constantly points out every single flaw you have, every chance she gets? How do you cope?

  For 18 year old Laney, she uses food as a coping mechanism. When her life gets to be too much, and the walls close in around her, she locks herself in her room and binge eats.

  For the past 18 years she has been made fun of, and tormented by her classmates, mentally abused by her own mom. She feels unworthy of love, and happiness. She feels as if everyone hates her. So she closes up, shutting down, refusing to let anyone in. Too scared of being hurt. It’s all she’s ever known.

  Things begin to change, when her perfect brother, Ajay brings his hot roommate, Levi home with him for the summer.

  Levi is just as cocky as he is sexy. He instantly rubs Laney the wrong way. She does her best to avoid him, but he doesn’t seem to take the hint. The more she tries to push him away, the more he fights to get in.

  As they spend more and more time together, Laney begins to lower her walls. But when Levi learns her secret, she shuts down again, and pushes him away.

  Can he break the walls she’s spent the last 18 years building? He’s determined to help her, but in the process he ends up falling head over heels in love with her. The one thing that scares him, is will she be there to catch him?

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  Warning this book contains strong coarse language, and intense sexual situations. It is not recommended for readers under the age of 17.

  Chloe Matthews thinks she’s in seventh heaven, when her parents decide to give her a taste of freedom, allowing her to go to an overnight beach party. Deep down, she has always resented them, for their strict overbearing ways. She is seventeen after all. Her night takes a huge nose dive, when she wonders off alone, drunk. She finds herself in a very dangerous situation. Alone and helpless, she learns first hand why her parents were so overprotective. Too ashamed, and embarrassed by her own stupidity, she absolutely refuses to tell anyone, even her best friend, Jen. Her silence only makes things worse, when she finds herself being stalked by him. Can she find the courage to make him pay, or will she forever be a victim?

  Keep watching for more books from

  Melanie J. Cole

 

 

 


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