“Oh. Is he still here? I thought he was going home for a while.”
“I did, too. But we got to talking and making honeymoon plans, and so he decided to just stay here until we all go for dinner,” Sheila explained. “Do you want me to make you some tea before we go for our walk?”
“That would be great, dear. And, do you think you or Rick could help me get the movie going on the television? I’d really like to watch whatever it is your father recorded for me.”
“Sure, Mom,” she replied with a smile. “I’ll take Josie so you can freshen up, and we’ll have some tea and get the TV ready for you in a few minutes.” She reached down and lifted the kitty from Joan’s lap, saying, “Come on, cutie pie. Let’s go make some tea.”
She opened the bedroom drapes to let the daylight stream in before leaving Joan alone to get up and get ready.
Joan swung her feet down to the floor and pushed off the mattress as she stood. “These old bones don’t like to move the way they used to,” she muttered. Then she added, “But I guess I should be thankful for two legs and two arms that can still do their jobs.”
Gazing in the mirror, she saw an old woman looking back at her. It’s funny, Lord, how part of me doesn’t feel any different inside than I did when I was Michelle’s age. But this mirror and these aches and pains don’t lie. Soon I’ll probably be seeing You, and my precious Phil, face to face. She smiled at her own reflection, brushed her hair a little, and then picked up her envelope and headed out to the front room.
Rick was down on one knee in front of the television, inserting the DVD into the player on the lower shelf of the cabinet. He stood as she entered the room and asked if she’d had a good rest.
“Yes. I feel much better, although still a little groggy,” she replied.
“This should help,” Sheila said, entering from the kitchen with a teacup in her hand. She set it down on the little table beside the rocking chair where Joan always loved to sit.
“Thanks, dear. Where’s Josie?” Joan asked.
Just then, the little kitten came bounding out of the hallway from the direction of the bathroom.
“I put her in the litter box one more time to make sure she knew where it was. I think she’ll be fine if we leave the bathroom door open when no one’s in there,” Sheila replied.
The white furball darted around the room, leapt on the couch, and then jumped off again.
“Be careful where you walk, Mom. She’s so tiny right now. I don’t want you to trip.”
“I’ll watch for her, honey. Don’t worry. We’ll be fine.”
Rick used the remote control to turn on the television and showed Joan how to begin playing the DVD. “The volume control works just like when you are watching a regular show,” he reminded her, indicating the up and down arrows. “And when you are ready to stop the movie or to pause it, you can just push this button.”
“Do you think you’ll want to watch regular TV after you see Dad’s DVD?” Sheila asked.
“No. I think I’ll read through this material when it’s over,” Joan replied, lifting the envelope.
“Okay, then all you need to do after you stop the DVD is to hit the power button and the television will shut off,” Rick said.
Sheila picked up her purse and jacket and said, “We’ll be back in about an hour or so.”
“Have fun,” Joan said, lifting her teacup to take a sip as she settled into the rocker for her movie.
Rick hit the play button on the remote. “Here goes,” he said, as he handed the device to Joan. “See you soon, Mom.”
Mom. That sounded nice coming from her future son-in-law.
Just as the front door closed behind them, an image of Phil, sitting in the shed on a stool, appeared before Joan, filling the television screen. He looked away from the camera for a moment and asked, “So it’s recording now?”
She could hear Trent’s voice in the background. “Yep. You’re on.”
“Okay, thanks.” She saw Trent dip his head down and wave goodbye into the camera, and then she heard the shed door close.
Phil’s eyes seemed to be gazing straight into hers. She sat forward in the rocker, leaning close to him.
“Hello, Jo. You’ve probably already had a chance to look at the other contents of the envelope I’m leaving you for Christmas.”
Oh no. Should I have looked at those first?
Her husband continued. “You may think you want to read all of them at once. But I hope you’ll follow our old rules and do what it says on each envelope.”
That old coot must have written some cards for various occasions! She smiled at the thought.
“As you can see, Trent’s been helping me out here in the shed. It was his idea to make the movies. Good thing the youngsters these days are born with natural skills in technology. I never would have been able to figure out this newfangled system.”
She smiled as she watched his eyes crinkle in a humble grin.
“I’ve been thinking about all the things I want to say to you here. But how do I put into words a lifetime of gratefulness?” He paused and took a deep breath. “We made it, Jo. We made it all the way to the end. Remember what Bob Hope used to say, ‘You know you're getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.’”
She chuckled softly. “Yes, I remember that one, Phil.”
He sat back on his stool a little, grasping a raised knee for balance. “Remember that camping trip to the lake for our first anniversary?”
“Yes. It rained the whole time,” she said.
“It rained the whole week,” he echoed. “But you were such a good sport as we snuggled in our tent and cooked dinner under umbrellas.”
She nodded, smiling at the memory.
“I knew I had captured myself a great gal after that week.” He paused and looked into the camera as if sitting right there looking into her eyes.
Joan’s heart leapt into her throat. Suddenly they were twenty-one again and so very much in love. So many memories came flooding back. The twinkle in his eye, his gentle touch, and the way he could always make her smile.
“Aside from the day I made you my bride, I’d have to say the very best day of my life was when we became parents,” Phil continued. “I remember watching them whisk you away to the delivery room. I thought I’d wear a hole in that gray linoleum floor with my pacing.” He looked down at his hands and then back through the camera to her heart. “Seeing you, with our tiny baby girl in your arms…well…I’ll just never forget that moment.”
She nodded. And suddenly she could actually feel Sheila, as a helpless newborn, snuggled to her chest. Tears of joy mingled with tears of longing for just one more moment with them all together as a family.
Phil’s voice caught her attention again. “I’d have to say that the hardest day of my life was when we had to say goodbye to Christopher.” His voice caught and she saw him swallow a lump of sorrow. “I suppose I’ll be seeing him again soon, though, sweetheart. And I’ll be sure to tell him all about you.”
Visions of their stillborn son flashed through Joan’s mind. Images she’d buried deep inside and rarely shared with anyone. She tried to imagine Phil meeting their little boy on the other side. What must that reunion have been like? And what would it be like for her to see them both together one day?
Phil’s posture on the screen straightened as he took a deep breath and continued. “I’m sure you’ll remember that scrappy little puppy I brought home the week after Christopher’s funeral. Sheila sure did love that little guy. They were inseparable.”
Memories of Sheila toddling around, trying to carry Riley Rover through the house brought a smile back to Joan’s face. That puppy was such a gift from God at a time when they really needed a boost of joy in their hearts.
A twinkle returned to Phil’s eye. “Hey, remember when I helped Sheila pull out her front tooth, and you had to leave the room?”
She laughed and wagged her finger at the screen. “You really had me going with that s
tring tied to her tooth,” she scolded the man on the screen.
Phil cleared his throat and looked right into her soul. “You’ve always had such a tender heart, Jo. It’s another thing I’ve treasured in you even though it meant I was in charge of cleaning and bandaging those scraped knees and elbows.”
Joan nodded. I’m so glad you were willing to do that, Phil. But you’ll never know how many times I had to do it myself, too.
He went on to reminisce about how they served side-by-side in premarital counseling for the church, and how valuable her input was as they guided young engaged folks into a lifelong commitment.
Phil dropped his foot to the floor and sat forward again. “I know I wasn’t always the perfect husband, Jo. I got so wrapped up in ministry from time to time, and left you home alone more nights than I should have.”
Joan wracked her memory. All she could think of was his faithfulness to be there with her and Sheila at nearly every dinner.
As if reading her thoughts, he said, “I guess I was pretty good about getting home for your cooking,” he chuckled, “but there were too many nights I had to leave again to go to a hospital or attend a church meeting. I know those things were important, and I believe God called me to do them. But this heart,” he said, tapping his chest, “this old ticker sure wishes I could get those nights back and spend them with you now.” His voice cracked as he finished speaking.
Tears filled Joan’s eyes. “It’s alright, dear. I understand.”
Phil leaned back and stretched his leg forward so he could pull a hanky out of his front pant pocket. Blowing his nose, he composed himself and continued. “So, it looks like we’ll be apart for a spell here.” He winced, and she remembered the pain he experienced those last few months.
“God’s calling me home, Jo.” Again his eyes looked directly at her. “I want you to spend however much time you have left, really living, Joan. I mean it. Don’t waste a moment. Seek God and ask Him what His purpose is for your remaining time on earth. Don’t let age rob you of whatever He might have planned.”
It was something she hadn’t expected to hear from him. Memories, yes. But this? His words reminded her of the impression she’d gotten back home in Mariposa. A purpose. Do you really have a purpose for me to fulfill even now? she asked God silently.
And a whisper in her spirit said, Yes.
“I love you, Jo. You have been all I could have ever wanted in a wife and even more. There was not a single day that I did not thank God for bringing you into my life.”
“I love you, too, Phil,” she whispered.
He leaned really close to the camera and added, “I’ll see you on the other side. You won’t need to look for me because I’ll be at the front of the crowd to welcome you home.”
Joan watched through the tears, as her husband blew her a kiss and then disappeared, replaced by a blank screen on the television.
She sat still for a long time, soaking in his smile and words. Then she lifted the envelope from the table and slid the contents out. A stack of cards and letters rested on her lap, each marked with a significant event. Anniversaries, birthdays, even Valentine’s Day—he remembered them all and had envelopes marked for her to open on each important day for the next few years.
Reaching for the remote control, she pressed the play button again. As she hoped, the DVD began at the beginning. She watched it several times, each time feeling a little more nostalgic and yet lighter in her spirit. It was a gift she would treasure for the rest of her earthly life.
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The week between Christmas and New Years flew by in a blur of preparations. When they weren’t focused on the wedding and reception, they were discussing and planning Joan’s move to Shoreline Manor. Rick even created floor plans with graph paper, and Sheila and Joan played with furniture arrangements for the living area and bedroom.
Josie was settling in to her new home and family. Joan purchased a few toys, and they all enjoyed a lot of laughs watching the busy little kitten throwing her toy mice in the air and pouncing on a feather teaser as Joan jiggled it on the floor.
“You’re going to have a lot of fun with her, Mom,” Sheila said, looking very satisfied with Rick’s gift.
“She does make me smile,” Joan admitted.
Sheila had arranged for Madison to come and stay with Joan while she and Rick were out of town. “She’ll be good company for you and Josie.”
A couple of days before the wedding, Joan and her daughter planned meals and went to the market. “Michelle will pick up anything else you need, Mom. Don’t hesitate to call her. She has to buy groceries herself once or twice a week anyway.”
Sheila and Rick stood at the doorway, saying goodnight. “I can’t wait for tomorrow,” he murmured softly into her ear. “You’ll be the most beautiful bride in the world.”
She smiled. “One of the oldest.”
“Not in my eyes. You make me feel like a kid again,” he said, taking both her hands in his. “I hope I can do this right,” he added.
“Do what?” she asked, her heart stopping for a moment.
“Be the kind of husband you deserve,” he replied. “It’s going to be quite a learning curve for this old bachelor.”
Relief washed over her, and she laughed softly. “Well, so far, Dr. Chambers, I’d say you’re off to a good start.”
“Why thank you,” he replied with a grin. “And tomorrow, it’ll be Dr. and Mrs. Chambers.”
Sheila just looked at him for a moment, once again taking in the amazing truth that she was marrying this man. “I can hardly wait. It will be my honor to wear your name.”
As he kissed her goodnight, an image from her childhood flashed through her mind of her parents kissing goodbye before her father went to the church office each morning. And she realized she hadn’t had a chance to watch the DVD he’d left behind for her. Tonight’s the night, she thought as she gave Rick a final hug.
“See you at the chapel,” she said.
“I’ll be waiting,” he replied.
Teeth brushed, face washed, and nightgown and robe donned, Sheila settled down on the couch and flipped on the television, careful to keep the volume low so she wouldn’t awaken her mother, who was sleeping soundly in the guest room.
She inserted her father’s DVD into the player and pushed the start button on the remote control.
As soon as she saw his face, her eyes filled with tears. And his voice, so familiar and comforting, filled not only her ears but also her very heart and mind.
“My darling daughter. How can I put into words all the thoughts and feelings I want to share with you?
“You and your mother are the light of my life. The greatest gifts God ever gave this old fellow. I hope you know that.
“There’s never been a day I didn’t find myself thanking Him for the honor and privilege of being your Dad. Each heartache and joy you’ve experienced, well you need to know I’ve experienced them right along with you.
“You’ve had more than your share of hurts, honey. I blame some of that on myself. If only I’d somehow helped you see how difficult life would be married to a non-believer, like John. God knows I tried. But I often wonder, did I try hard enough? To reach out to him as well as advise you?”
Sheila hit the pause button. “Oh, Dad,” she said to the face on the screen. “There’s no way you could have dissuaded me from marrying him.” She thought back over the many years of struggles in her marriage, especially the desperate act of trying to take his own life that John had committed in the not so distant past.
Then she thought about her Dad’s steady love and compassion, and how he’d intervened and actually led her husband to the foot of the cross. “You did well, Dad. And I love you for it.”
After taking a deep breath, she pushed play again. “My great consolation is the wonderful grandchildren you and John gave us.” His voice cracked as he added, “I never realized how deeply I’d love them. Being a grandfather took me by surprise.”
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br /> She smiled, remembering the first time she’d placed Michelle in her father’s arms. He held her tentatively at first, which surprised her because she’d seen him cradle many a newborn at church dedications. But this one was hers. And she could see the difference in his countenance and posture.
“It’s okay, Dad. She won’t break,” she’d said.
And he’d leaned down and breathed in the fragrance of her newborn daughter. When he looked back up, his eyes were brimming with tears.
Drawn back to her father’s voice, she focused again on the screen in front of her and joined her father in a sweet time of reminiscing about their family. Vacations, special events, and priceless moments the two of them had shared. It was almost like having him sitting there with her, remembering it all together.
And then the focus switched to the present.
“I know you and Rick are getting very serious, sweetheart. And I want you to know that I have a good feeling about him. Sometimes the people who become the closest to God are the ones who’ve pushed Him away for most of their lives. When the walls are broken down, and they see Him face-to-face in His Word, and sense His spirit tugging on their hearts, they discover a love they will cling to fiercely from that point on.
“I believe your professor friend is one of those converts. He knows life without God, and now he knows life with Him. There’s no turning back. He will stay the course to the end. I really believe that. And it blesses me to think that you may end up making that journey with him.
“If it comes to that, and the two of you marry, I want you to know that you have my blessing. It saddens me to think of missing that event, of not being able to be your Dad and walk you down the aisle once again. But know that my love will be there. And as surely as I will be holding onto Jesus on the other side, as long as you and Rick do the same, we will be linked in spirit.”
Sheila nodded, tears streaming down her face. And although he wouldn’t be present in the flesh tomorrow, she knew a part of him would be there in her heart.
From the Heart (Sandy Cove Series Book 5) Page 11
