by S. E. Brown
As the song came to an end, Madison pulled back and looked into Declan’s soft eyes. “Thank you.”
The corners of his lips turned upward as he lowered his head to brush his lips against hers. “Anything for you.”
Madison tightened her arms around his neck, bringing his lips closer for a more passionate kiss.
As their kisses grew more intense, the music was ignored and they stopped swaying. Hands began to explore, running up and down arms. Tongues met. Necks were tasted.
Soon what started off as a slow kiss had escalated into something that was quickly leading them down a new path.
When Declan felt Madison’s fingers skim his flesh under his shirt, he reached down and took her hand in his. “Hey, wait a sec.”
“What?” she asked breathily.
He paused a second before he quietly answered. “I don’t want our first time to happen like this. Not in the middle of the gym.”
Madison lifted up on her toes and kissed the bottom of his jaw. “Let’s go back to my place then.”
All thoughts of the previous conversation had been left behind. There was a sparkle in Madison’s eye now and Declan knew what she wanted.
He just wasn’t so sure.
Hand in hand they turned off the lights and locked the front door.
The ride to Madison’s house was quiet but filled with tension. Finally, Declan spoke. “Please don’t take this the wrong way, but for tonight, I’m just going to drop you off.”
The hand that was on Declan’s knee moved up to this thigh. “You are? Why don’t you come in for a while?”
Declan knew if he came in, it wouldn’t be just for a while. He laid his hand over hers. “I want to, but tonight, I’m just going to drop you off,” he repeated, his tone more decisive than the last time. Although, he wasn’t sure who he was trying to convince more.
Madison’s hand immediately went to her lap. “Okay.” She had a hard time disguising the hurt in her voice. Having a man turn down her advances wasn’t something she was used to. In fact, if anyone had been doing the turning down, it was her.
The rest of the ride was filled with tension for an entirely different reason.
When he pulled into the driveway, Declan put the car into park but didn’t turn off the ignition.
“Is it me, Declan?” Madison finally asked, although she wasn’t even sure where the question came from. She was strong and confident, but something about the way he turned her down hit her the wrong way. She had opened up. And cried. It seemed for every brick of wall she had taken down, he had suddenly put them all back up.
Shit. Maybe he thinks I’m some softy that gets all weepy and sappy at shit now.
“No, Madison. Not at all.” He shifted in his seat so he was facing her.
“Then what is it?”
“God, yes,” he almost groaned.
Madison looked at him, completely confused by his response. “Yes, what?” she asked, waiting for him to explain.
“I am attracted to you. So damn attracted to you. And I enjoy spending time with you. You’re beautiful and funny and strong …”
“Then what is it, Declan? I don’t understand.”
“I just don’t want to rush into anything.”
“And you coming in tonight would be rushing?”
“Yes …”
Madison nodded. She was lost somewhere between hurt and disbelief.
“Please say something.”
“I’m not sure quite sure what to say, Declan. You want me, but you don’t.”
He sighed, taking her hands in his and running his thumbs over her knuckles. “It’ll happen. Just not tonight.”
For what felt like several long minutes, they sat in silence, looking at each other, past each other, and then back into each other’s eyes again.
“I guess I should go,” Madison finally said, breaking the silence.
Declan nodded, hoping he hadn’t just ruined everything. “I’ll see you tomorrow? At class?”
“Yeh, I’ll see if I can make it.”
Feeling hurt and pissed off, again, Madison removed her hands from his and opened the car door. She got out and walked up to the door, alone. Taking her keys from her purse, she unlocked the door, and walked in the house. And without looking back to him, she closed the door.
Chapter 9
“Seriously. He fucking turned me down, telling me we would be rushing things or some crazy shit like that.”
Jessa looked at Madison, sharing in her friend’s disbelief. She hadn’t known anyone to turn down Madison Quinn before. Never.
“Maybe he has a good reason?” she offered. “Maybe he’s just more cautious, like something happened in his past to make him want to wait.”
“Maybe.” Madison tried to look at the scenario from a different angle. It wasn’t like Jessa to use logic to figure out why someone did or didn’t do something, so she had to give the idea some consideration.
“You don’t think … You don’t think he’s a virgin, do you?”
Madison looked at her friend, completely speechless. Finally finding her voice, she spoke. “No. No way in hell. You’ve seen this guy. There is not a chance.” She took another drink from her glass and her eyebrows shot up at a memory. “No, he’s not. He told me had a one-night stand once.”
“Well, thank God for that!”
Jessa looked at her friend, trying to read her expression and finally seeing something she had been experiencing herself. Someone had finally cracked the barrier. Someone had found their way beneath Madison’s Kevlar exterior and was crawling into her heart.
“You like this guy,” Jessa pointed out, and it nearly sounded like an accusation.
Madison looked quickly to her friend, ready to reject the claim, but couldn’t. There was something about Declan. She couldn’t quite put a finger on it, or even attempt to explain it to Jessa, but she liked him. And she finally realized she liked him enough that she was willing to wait. To learn more about him. To spend time together. To give a part of herself to a relationship – something other than her body.
“Shit,” she sighed. “Yeh, I think I do.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
It had been too long since Declan had seen Madison. She hadn’t come into the gym for class the day after, or the day after that.
He finally called Erin, acting as though he wanted to talk about the alarm system. He knew, however, his sister would press him for information about who he’d been with the night it went off, and figured she could give her input on the situation and offer suggestions for how to fix it.
“Hey sis. Can you talk?” he asked when Erin answered the phone.
“Sure. Hang on a sec while I put Ike down. He just fell asleep.”
“Okay.” He could hear Erin moving around.
A minute or so later, she finally spoke. “So what’s up?”
“I just wanted to check in, see how things were going. Talk about the alarm going off the other night.”
“Things are going well. Your nephew has been getting us up at regular intervals and we’re both very anxious for the first time he decides he wants to sleep through the night.”
Declan chuckled. “I don’t envy you that. I’d be pretty pissed if someone continued to disrupt my sleep.”
“Don’t worry, you’re time will come. Ike’s worth it, though.”
Declan smiled. It was weird to hear his sister talk about being a mom and all that went with it. Thankfully she had a pretty great role model growing up, and he knew she’d do just fine.
“What about the alarm?” she asked. “You find out anything more?”
“Nope. We’re still not exactly sure what happened.”
“Really?”
“Hey, at least it was a false alarm instead of someone getting in and trashing the place.”
“Is there anything I could have done to prevent it?”
“No, I don’t think so. The security company was just here and they reworked a couple of the wires. Hopefully things will be good mo
ving forward.”
“Thanks, Declan. I’m sorry you had to deal with all of this.”
“I am the owner, you know.”
“I know, but I’m your manager. You shouldn’t have to worry about these types of things.”
“Good thing you’re my sister then, huh? I’d be giving Nelson hell if this happened in his gym.” He loved teasing her about how he let things slide at her gym more than he did at the other. She hated when he did it, but it was one of the simple pleasures he got to enjoy as an older brother, and a boss.
“No special treatment, Declan. Remember?”
“I’m kidding. Relax. You’re doing a great job, and you’ve kinda had your hands full the last few months. No worries.”
“Thanks,” she responded. “So you want to tell me who was with you the other night? I’m guessing it wasn’t just the police since you wouldn’t fess up.”
Declan sighed, not because she brought her up, but because he was frustrated with the whole situation. “Her name is Madison.”
“And…” Erin prodded.
“Hang on, let me close the door.”
Declan and Erin had always been open with each other growing up. In many ways, they were each other’s best friend. Aidan included. They used to bounce “I don’t understand what he/she means” conversations off each other. It was nice having access to the other sex’s perspective.
“She’s Ryan’s best friend. And things were going really great until I ruined it.”
“Ruined it? How?”
“I get the sense she’s one of those people that has a lot of walls built up, and she was taking them down, opening up to me.”
“That sounds like a good thing, bub.”
“It is. But then we were kind of going at it pretty hard in the back gym –“
“Eww!” Erin interrupted.
“Shut up. You want to hear this or not?”
“Yes. Continue … just don’t give me too many details, kay?”
“There really aren’t any more details to tell. That’s kind of the problem.”
Erin didn’t need to hear anymore. She already knew exactly where this conversation was headed. “Declan, you didn’t.” Unfortunately, she’d seen him do this before. He’d find a woman he liked and then freeze when it came time to actually have sex with her, claiming he didn’t want to rush things.
“Yeh. I explained that I really like spending time with her and everything. I just didn’t want to ...”
“Rush things, get physical, do the horizontal mambo -”
“Erin…”
“And let me guess, she got pissed.”
“Well, she certainly wasn’t happy. She left the car and walked into the house without saying a word. I haven’t seen or talked to her since.”
“Bud, what is with you?”
“What?”
“You’re almost thirty-five.”
“So?”
“Are you playing the three date rule or something? Because you know that shit is old.” When it came to this particular topic, she had no patience for him. He was one of the kindest, nicest people she knew, but she could never understand why he wouldn’t sleep with the women he dated.
Doesn’t the man ever just get horny?
Erin shook her head at the thought. The last thing she wanted to think about was her brother having sex.
“No…”
“Then why not sleep with her?”
“I just didn’t want to rush anything.” Even as he said it, he realized how much like an ass he sounded.
“God, sometimes you are such a girl.”
“What, just because I’m a guy I’m supposed to want to get in the pants of every woman that walks by?”
“Well, sort of, yeh.”
“That’s not me, Erin. You know that.”
“I know,” she sighed. “Why not go to her place and talk to her? Force the issue?”
“Because I’m trying to not be a total ass.”
“You’re not going to break down her door, Declan. Just talk to her. She’ll come to her senses and see you’re worth the wait.”
“You make me sound like a sixteen-year old virgin.”
“Well, then quit acting like one.”
“Why do I bother talking to you?”
“Because you know I’m right, and you love me. You take control in every other facet of your life. You’re highly educated and smart. You own two very successful businesses. You’re financially secure. You have unique hobbies. People like you and like spending time with you.” Erin paused a moment then handed him the hammer. “Get over yourself and this damn need to shoot yourself in the foot every time you find someone you want to spend time with. Go. Talk. To. Her.”
“Fine…”
“You need to get laid, Declan. Seriously. Don’t forget to take a condom when you go.”
“Okay. Enough. I think I hear Mom calling you.”
“Very funny.” She calmed her tone, back to being the loving sister. “Let me know how it goes okay?”
“Thanks, sis.”
“You’re welcome.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Madison stood at the reception desk secretly hoping Declan was working. She felt silly and stupid for reacting the way she had to Declan, especially after Jessa made her wake up and realize she actually liked the guy. She was so used to not caring, not wanting relationships with men, she wasn’t sure how to act or what to do. For as ballsy as she was, she knew next to nothing about being in an actual, committed relationship. The last one she’d been in had ended a long, long time ago.
On a double mission, she got out of bed and decided to hit the gym. With some luck, she’d find Declan and they could patch things up – if she hadn’t ruined the relationship for good. She also wanted to beat the shit out of something. The last couple of days had been near torture and she was ready to wail on the bags.
Normally what people thought of her would roll right off her shoulders. She really didn’t give a shit. She had learned from a young age her personal happiness was up to her and what other people thought of her didn’t matter.
Thinking about it now, there was really only one person whose thoughts did matter – Ellie’s – although she gave Madison nothing but unconditional love. In fact, it was more that Madison strived to do her best so she wouldn’t let Ellie down.
For some reason though, Declan’s rejection hit her hard. And let’s face it: her ego had taken a beating. She had been more than ready to take him inside and let nature take its course.
“Hey, Madison,” Issy greeted her in what Madison was beginning to understand was her usual cheery nature. “You here for the eleven o’clock class?”
“Hi, Issy,” she smiled. “Yes, please.”
Issy punched a couple of keys on the keyboard. “You’re all set.”
“What do I owe you?”
“Nothing. This one is on the house.”
Knowing it was a directive Declan must have given, Madison didn’t feel right about it. If she was going to participate in classes at his gym, she wanted to pay her way. It was one thing to offer a free class when a person was looking to join, but it was entirely different to just zero out any payments because of the relationship she had with the owner, whether or not they were on speaking terms.
“I’d like to pay, please. How much is the class?”
Madison handed her cash, leaving Issy a little confused. No one had ever demanded to pay before.
A few minutes after the class started, there was a lull at the desk and Issy walked to Declan’s office. “Hey Declan. You have a second?”
“Sure, Issy. What’s up?”
“The other day you told me to comp Madison Quinn’s classes.”
Declan nodded. “Right.”
“She, umm … she just insisted on paying.”
“She’s here?” he asked, rising from his seat. His heart began to beat faster.
“Yeh. She’s in Michael’s class right now.”
“Okay. Thank
s for letting me know. I’ll take care of it.”
Issy nodded and returned to the reception desk.
For Declan, it was the longest hour of his life. He refused to go to the classroom and stalk her. He’d just wait until she came out from the locker room after class and talk to her then.
He was standing in the doorframe of his office when Madison finally made her way to the front of the gym. He was pretending to be enthralled with the papers in his hand, but even she knew he was waiting for her. Taking out her aggressions on the bag had once again helped her see more clearly.
“Hey,” she said quietly as she approached him.
“Hey.”
They looked at each other for a minute, neither really knowing what to say. Declan was feeling bad for the way things were left the other night, and Madison was feeling like an ass the way she let his rejection get to her. The fact that he wanted to wait to better solidify their relationship shouldn’t have been an issue. In so many ways, she should have seen it as a good thing.
“I’m sorry, Declan –“
“You wanna come in for a sec?” they said at the same time.
Both chuckled quietly.
“Yeh, of course,” Madison said with a soft smile.
Declan stood to the side so she could enter the office and closed the door behind them.
“I’m sorry about the other night,” Madison said, looking him in the eye.
“I’m sorry I was an ass.”
“But you weren’t, Declan. In fact, you were probably right. Waiting will only make it that much better when it does happen.”
He smiled, liking the sound that it would, indeed, eventually happen.
“It’ll happen when it’s supposed to?” he asked, taking her hands.
Madison nodded and gently kissed him.
They could have easily continued the kiss but there was a knock on the door.
Declan sighed as he pulled back and rested his forehead against hers. “Damn it. Ten bucks says that’s Aidan.”
“Sounds like you have insider information. I don’t think I’ll take that bet.”
Giving her a quick peck, Declan let go of her hands and opened the door. In a flash, two arms wound around one leg and a second set of arms wrapped around his waist.
