by Trisha Baker
"I thought of blood banks, "Jimmy said, not wanting to seem like a complete moron of a vampire. He joined Maggie, Charles, and the mortal Lee at the round oak table, the blood pack clutched in his hands. "I just didn't know how to get into them."
"Don't ever snatch blood from a blood bank," Charles admonished. "It's monitored too carefully because there's almost always a shortage. It's easy for us; Ballnamore was a licensed research lab so we had a right to draw blood. Now, Lee's a doctor, so what we do is pay healthy mortals for transfusions and solicit enough to last a year or so."
"So we never have to feed directly from people?"
Meghann sighed. "I wish, but vampires sicken if they go too long without fresh mortal blood."
"What's too long?" Jimmy demanded and opened the now warm transfusion pack, pouring the blood into an oversize coffee mug Charles gave him. He could taste the difference between fresh blood and a transfusion pack immediately—it was kind of like regular versus diet soda. But it wasn't bad and he did feel the familiar strength coursing through him as he drank.
"It varies," Charles shrugged. "I tend to need fresh feedings once a month whereas Meghann needs them bi-monthly. But packs are enormously helpful for new vampires. Through the packs, you can train yourself to make do with less and then when you feed from a mortal, it's easier to stop before you kill them. Also, Meghann or I will chaperone you when you feed for a while. Don't feel insulted—both of us had an escort when we were first learning to restrain the blood lust."
Far from feeling insulted, Jimmy was relieved that if he did get carried away, from now on he'd be pulled off mortals before he hurt them. "Uh, do you think it would be okay if just you went with me, Charles?" The last thing he wanted was for Maggie to see him reduced to a blood-hungry savage she had to pull away from his host like some ravenous dog being yanked away from raw meat.
Charles and Maggie exchanged a look before they both nodded, Maggie seeming to understand why Jimmy didn't want her with him when he fed.
"I'll just handle the other aspects of your training, Jimmy," she said.
"What other aspects? What are you talking about?"
"To begin with, simple tricks any vampire is capable of," Maggie said and started cleaning peanut butter off Ellie's face and hands. "Sit still, Miss... you don't want that sticky stuff in your hair. What do you need to learn? Telekinesis, flying the astral plane—that's very important, it can save your life if you need to escape or you're far away from shelter and dawn is coming. Also, we'll work on any dormant psychic ability vampirism has brought out in you. For example, transformation gave me the ability to summon spirits ..."
"No," Jimmy said forcefully. "I don't want to mess with magic like all of you do. I'm no fucking sorcerer. Just teach me what I need to know to survive—that's all."
Maggie started to protest but Charles took her hand and something passed between the two of them that made her shrug. "Okay, Jimmy. If that's the way you want it. But flying the astral plane is something you'll need to learn for survival."
"Yeah, "Jimmy muttered, not so much in agreement as acknowledgment of her words. He couldn't explain what made him so uneasy. It just seemed that once he became like Maggie and Charles, with their way of holding whole conversations without ever opening their mouths, appearing and disappearing as the spirit willed them, that would be the end of Jimmy as a human. A cynical voice told him he'd stopped being human the moment Simon Baldevar forced his blood down Jimmy's throat but Jimmy shrugged it off just as he'd shrugged off Maggie. He'd learn to drink blood without killing and he'd adjust to never seeing the sunlight but as for the rest... Maybe it was stupid but Jimmy thought the more he behaved as a mortal, the easier it would be to pretend this whole awful nightmare had never happened.
Suddenly Jimmy remembered the terrible fights he used to have with Maggie, the way he'd beg her to transform him and she'd refuse, saying transformation was a curse. At the time, he'd refuted her words with bitter sarcasm—what the hell was so terrible about living forever and never getting sick or infirm? But now Jimmy understood. She'd been speaking of that awful feeling of being different, of standing to the side of humanity—observing but never belonging.
"No, Jimmy," Maggie said, not the least bit embarrassed that she'd eavesdropped on his thoughts. "We do belong ... maybe not with humans ... but we have each other. Some vampires, it's true, become cold and cynical. They live just to prey on victims, never allowing themselves to be touched by love. But Charles and I never feel alone; we have each other. Don't ever close your heart or feel you're an outcast. It's those feelings that can turn you into a monster, not the blood lust."
"Are those feelings what turned Baldevar into a monster?" Jimmy asked caustically, his tone full of all the anger and betrayal he'd felt when Maggie told him she loved the hateful bastard.
Maggie flushed but held his gaze and her voice betrayed no emotion when she spoke. "I don't want any false pretense between us, Jimmy. I did love Simon, in spite of what he is. But no matter how much I loved him, I still cared about you. I still did everything I could to help you."
"I wouldn't have needed any fucking help if your shithead boyfriend left me alone! "Jimmy snarled and Ellie whimpered. Immediately he lowered his voice, feeling ashamed of himself for yelling at Maggie when he'd still be a vegetable or dead if she hadn't helped him. "Look, Maggie, I just can't understand it. Why the hell would you love him after all he did to you, after the way he murdered poor Alcuin in front of you?"
Maggie and Charles both lowered their heads and Jimmy felt like even more of a heel. He probably shouldn't have brought Alcuin up—he knew they were both still grieving for the gentle priest-turned-vampire who had taken them both under his wing and taught them his way of living in peace with mortals.
"Simon does terrible things," Maggie said and just the way she said his name told Jimmy how much she still cared for him. He swallowed his rage and forced himself to listen to her. "But for all his monstrous behavior, he's also capable of great tenderness and love."
"Simon is a very different person when he's with her," Charles said quietly. "I was just as incredulous as you when they first reunited, Jimmy. But the way I saw him treat Meghann ... so sensitive, so devoted to her and the baby ... I really thought his love for her would change him. And of course, during Meghann's pregnancy, she really had no choice but to trust him—he was the only one that could keep her safe."
"Yeah," Jimmy agreed, remembering Maggie telling him that as soon as it became known that she was pregnant, all the vampires that used to fight on the side of Alcuin wanted to kill her. "I still don't understand that. I mean, I thought Alcuin taught you guys not to kill—going after a pregnant woman sounds more like something Baldevar would do."
Charles and Maggie exchanged another of their complicated, indecipherable glances.
"Before Simon transformed, he was an alchemist,"
Maggie told Jimmy. "He believed the secret to eternal life lay in transmutation of blood—purifying it of every flaw that left humans vulnerable to disease and old age. After he transformed, he worked on developing his theories, trying to discover why vampires could defeat death but be destroyed by sunlight. He finally decided that when you transform, your blood banishes many impurities from your system, but it's still not perfect. However, Simon thought there was one way to achieve a strain with all our strengths and none of our flaws—by mingling the blood of two vampires through conception. He thought a vampire baby would be immortal, walk in daylight and give its parents that same ability once they drank a small portion of the child's blood.
"Of course," Maggie finished with an ironic grin, "none of Simon's enemies wanted him to gain this ability. So they decided to kill me before I gave birth to a child that would free Lord Baldevar from darkness and give him a deadly edge over other vampires during the day."
"You mean they thought he'd drink the kid's blood and then go around offing vampires during the day?" Chilled, Jimmy glanced at Ellie, noisily banging a pl
astic cup against the tray of her high chair. Was Baldevar planning to drink Ellie's blood and then murder every vampire in existence, with the possible exception of Maggie and Charles? It was hard to believe, looking at the giggling little girl with her just-washed face and innocent green eyes that she was a superhuman and utterly unique creature—a vampire unaffected by sunlight.
"Ellie's not a vampire at all," Maggie said shortly. "We discovered that shortly after she was born. She's mortal, with no signs of vampirism in her chromosomes or her behavior. She's only different from other babies in that she show signs of genius level intelligence and a highly developed extrasensory ability."
"So she's not a threat to those assholes that tried to kill you ... they'll leave you and her alone?"
Maggie shrugged. "It certainly seems that way. At first, right after Ellie was born, a few came here to do battle. That's why Charles attacked you when we sensed a vampire's presence; we're still pretty edgy. But they haven't bothered us in a while . . . not since word got around that Ellie's just a mortal baby Lord Baldevar has no interest in raising."
There was a weird, rushed quality to the way Maggie said those last words that made Jimmy's eyes narrow. "What do you mean 'a baby Baldevar has no interest in raising?'"
"He abandoned Meghann and Ellie," Charles said and Maggie shot him a grateful look. "He was so disgusted when all his plans and schemes gave him nothing more than a human child—a girl child at that—that he wants nothing to do with mother or daughter."
"What an asshole," Jimmy proclaimed in disgust. "Blaming Maggie cause they had a mortal kid. And who gives a shit—it's still a baby to love." So smug did Jimmy feel in his superiority to his narrow-minded enemy that he never noticed the shuffling glances and tension of everyone else at the table. "So he just took off?"
Maggie nodded. "We have no idea where he is or if he has any intention of coming back. I don't think he hates me or Ellie; he left me the deed to this house and enough money to live comfortably for several centuries."
"So that makes everything all right?" Jimmy flared, angry because Maggie wasn't angry. "What the hell is the matter with you, Maggie? The asshole walked out on you both; you should fucking hate him—not give thanks cause he left you a beach house and a couple of dollars for his own twisted form of alimony. And when you combine that with what you tell me he used to do—how he beat you up and stuff—Christ, Maggie! What's it going to take to make you forget about him?"
"I'm never going to forget Simon," Maggie said and now her voice sounded ragged and squeaky, like she was trying to suppress tears. "I'm sorry, Jimmy, I know what you want. You want us to be like we were before and I won't lie to you. I don't think I'll ever be able to love another man, not after ..."
"Mommy," Ellie cried in distress when Maggie put her head in her hands and started sobbing. "Mommy, no!"
"No, baby, don't cry," Maggie said, tears still streaming down her face though she tried to smile when Ellie started to cry at the sight of her mother so upset. Maggie shoved her chair aside and picked the little girl up before rushing out of the room.
"No, Jimmy," Charles said and grabbed Jimmy's wrist when he would have rushed after her. "Let her alone."
"She needs me! She needs someone to make her see ..
"Jimmy." Lee spoke up for the first time and came over to take Jimmy by the arm and guide him back into his chair. "Can't you see how much it upsets her to talk about Simon? You're opening a very nasty wound and we can't have you doing that. Meghann needs time to heal."
"What the hell are you going to do to stop me?" Jimmy sneered and then stopped, appalled by the bullying tone of voice—he sounded just like Baldevar did whenever he'd threatened Jimmy.
To his credit, Lee neither cowered nor challenged him; he simply went on speaking calmly. "I won't have to stop you because I know you're just like Charles and me—you want only the best for Meghann. Isn't that right?"
At Jimmy's nod, Lee continued. "Now you seem to think the best is resuming your former relationship with her, becoming lovers again. But Meghann isn't ready for a lover, not yet."
"Are you trying to tell me we should let her spend eternity pining away for that creep?"
'Jimmy," Charles said and Jimmy's eyes narrowed at the slight amusement he thought he heard in the other vampire's tone. "It hasn't even been a year since Simon disappeared. I'd hardly say that counts as eternity. You must understand, no matter how much it hurts you, that Meghann was very vulnerable during her pregnancy and she turned to Simon for comfort. And I must say, he treated her with extraordinary sensitivity and tenderness. I know you think he's nothing but a cold-hearted fiend and certainly you have every right to feel that way after the way he treated you. But just as Meghann understands your feelings, you must try and see things from her point of view. If you keep trying to ram your own hatred down her throat, you'll do nothing except drive a wedge between you. For now, give her time to grieve, time to heal."
Jimmy nodded his agreement. If anything proved Charles's point, it was the way Maggie had run out of the room when Jimmy kept needling her about Simon Baldevar. He should have remembered from all the years they'd been together that Maggie never liked to talk about Baldevar.
That bastard did some job with her head, Jimmy thought grimly and got up. "I'm just gonna make sure she's okay," he told Charles and this time the vampire made no protest when he left the kitchen in search of Maggie.
It took awhile of prowling the endless corridors of the house but Jimmy finally found Maggie when his sharp ears detected a low voice singing on the third floor.
Maggie and the baby were in a room that was plainly the nursery, with cheerful murals of fairy tales painted on the walls and expensive-looking baby furniture that consisted of a crib, toy trunk, a small bureau and a changing table.
Maggie was perched on a green-and-white striped window seat, her sleeping child lying against her breast. Maggie's chin rested on Ellie's head, the long cascade of her fiery red hair covering the baby like a blanket while she crooned a lullaby to her daughter.
Don't move, Jimmy silendy implored and gave thanks when Maggie kept still while he squeezed off a few shots from the Nikon around his neck. What a perfect shot of mother and child reposing together; the sleeping litde girl with her flushed cheeks and damp curls cuddled against the beautiful young woman who barely looked old enough to have a child.
Before transformation, Jimmy had considered himself a decent amateur photographer. Now what used to be a hobby was rapidly becoming one of the few times he felt at peace with himself. Behind the lens, Jimmy wasn't an outcast predator; he was a chronicler of life, seeing the night from an utterly unique angle.
When Jimmy gave her permission to move, Maggie turned to him and he was relieved to see her green eyes were clear and dry. "That's my first picture with Ellie. Of course, we have tons of pictures of her but we weren't able to get any of the two of us together. You're the only one who knows how to manipulate the negatives so vampires don't come out as the usual blur in a picture."
"It's no big deal,"Jimmy shrugged.
"It is so," Maggie protested in a hushed voice so she wouldn't wake the baby and carried Ellie over to her crib. "How would you feel if you'd had no pictures of you and Jay together? I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that."
"No," Jimmy told her. "I know what you mean and I'm glad I could take a picture of you and Ellie. I'll take plenty more if you want me to."
"I'd like that,"-Maggie smiled and pulled a pink blanket over the baby before tucking a golden-brown teddy bear into the crook of Ellie's arms.
"Goodnight, Princess," Maggie whispered and leaned down to kiss her daughter's forehead. Then, turning to Jimmy, she said, "We have a suite with an extra walk-in closet. Maybe you could turn it into a darkroom."
Jimmy followed her to a room that, thank God, wasn't the same one Baldevar had imprisoned him in. This suite was on the north side of the house, overlooking the fir-lined private road instead of the beach. He could see that the
extra closet in what Maggie called the day room would serve as a fine darkroom. Next, Maggie showed him a bedroom he immediately felt comfortable in with its polished wood floor and furniture decorated in solid earth tones.
"You'll be happy here?" Maggie asked a little anxiously and Jimmy almost laughed when he thought of the difference between this luxurious house and the cheap trailer he'd called home for the past couple of months. She might as well ask a wino if they'd prefer to keep their cardboard box rather than move in with her.
"I'll be happy as long as you want me here . .. and you're not just asking me to stay out of pity."
"No, Jimmy," Maggie said, seeming surprised that he'd even think that. She came away from the window over to Jimmy's side and hugged him tightly. "Charles was right when he said you took a risk by coming here but I'm very happy that you did. I've missed you."
"I missed you too, Maggie," Jimmy whispered and tried to remember his resolve downstairs not to push a physical relationship on her but the hug was making it damned difficult. For one thing, her thick, long hair was tickling his hands as he grasped her waist and it didn't take a lot of imagination to remember making love with her on top of him, that brilliant red hair fanning out and teasing his chest.
No! He'd screw up his chances with Maggie for good if he kept panting at her, insisting she forget Baldevar and start up with him again. Maggie had been through a lot what with Alcuin dying, giving birth, and those other horrid vampires trying to kill her and Ellie. It was understandable that she'd turned to Baldevar and that the prick, with the centuries he had over her, all his Black Magic mumbo jumbo and most of all that damned blood link that connected any vampire with their master forever, was able to twist Maggie's thoughts until she thought she loved him. Jimmy knew Maggie had been brainwashed; all he had to do was make her see that.
But just try and tell all those good, rational thoughts to certain idiot parts of his body that were growing harder and more insistent by the second, tantalized by the tea-rose scent Maggie always wore and soft feminine curves of her body pressed against him.
