by Trisha Baker
"I never want to see you again!" Meghann screamed, infuriated by the hurt tears that threatened to spill out of her eyes. She'd wept over Simon's dying body, thought she'd die along with him if he left her and look what he was doing to her now! "How dare you call me an unfit mother when our son is dead because of what you raised him to be!"
Simon struck her chin, breaking her jaw. "Tell me where my daughter is."
"You can't see it, can you?" Meghann demanded after her shattered bones healed. "Beat me all you want, it won't do you any good. I can't tell you where Ellie and Jimmy are because I don't know! They've gone someplace far away and they won't come back until I tell Ellie it's all right. And I'll never do that, no matter what you do to me . . . you won't have any chance to destroy Ellie through me!"
Simon's eyes didn't harden or narrow. Instead, rage gave them a transparent, glassy quality that made Meghann fear for her life as he leaned toward her .. .
And she suddenly found herself in New York City, standing in front of a town house she hadn't thought of in years.
Meghann looked around, unable to believe the busy Manhattan street and mellowed oak wood facade of the town house were real. Certainly, it was possible that terror gave her the ability to escape Simon via the astral plane but no vampire could travel from
Southampton to New York City. Why, it was a distance of more than ninety miles—more than triple the maximum distance of thirty miles a vampire could fly!
Mikal's blood has given you greater power, Banrion.
"Alcuin?" Meghann said, not noticing the curious stares of passersby as she looked around for the ghostly mentor she could hear but not see.
Don't let Simon push you away, Banrion. He needs you so desperately. You must help him do right by your daughter and remind him of my promise.
"What promise?" Meghann asked but the otherworldly presence surrounding her had vanished. Now she felt all the sensations of the physical world it had forced back . . . the hot cement sidewalk beneath her flimsy summer shoes and soft light of the streetlight beaming down on her, the muggy staleness of the city air in contrast with the sharp ocean breeze of Southampton.
Meghann stared at the elegant town house, thinking that this was where everything truly began, far more so than the house on Long Island Mikal had appropriated to carry out his vicious batde against his parents.
Had Mikal known about the town house, Meghann wondered as she climbed up the smooth marble steps. Did he know this was where his father transformed his mother during World War II? Did he know thirteen years after that transformation Meghann thought she'd finally thrown off Simon's brutal rule over her body and soul by staking him and leaving him on the rooftop for the dawn of a new day to finish him off?
Right now, Meghann would heavily regret not killing Simon that long ago night if it wasn't for her daughter. It wasn't immortality but Ellie that was Simon Baldevar's one true gift to her. She should have left the ungrateful bastard to die the other night instead of risking her own life to save him.
But if his behavior tonight finally had made her see the error in loving him, why couldn't she get rid of the dull, tight ache in her heart? Why did she still shudder when she remembered that hideous night a week ago when she'd held Simon's dying body in her arms? She'd been out of her mind with grief and pain, knowing if Simon died she would too and it wouldn't be through suicide either. Meghann would have simply lost the will to live this life without Simon Baldevar in it.
Damn you, Simon Baldevar, Meghann thought savagely and glared at the mahogany front door with its stained glass panels and it swung open for her. How can I love a monster like you when all you do is hurt me?
Meghann stepped through the foyer with no thought of trespassing on some mortal's home. She knew Simon still owned the property, had reclaimed it around the same time he decided to come back from the dead and reclaim her.
Perhaps it was foolish to enter this house where Simon could easily find her; maybe she should use her head start to escape him more permanently. But Meghann knew Simon could probably find her wherever she went—damned if she'd give him the satisfaction of watching her run in fear. Better to remain here and face head on the confrontation she knew couldn't be far away.
Most of the priceless furniture Meghann remembered was packed away in storage. Only a few massive pieces remained, covered in huge sheets that made the large rooms seem desolate and abandoned as she wandered through the dark house.
Meghann paused at the steps leading to the basement, thinking of the bedroom that lay below and all she'd gone through there—everything from unimaginable pleasure to the utter disintegration of her ego as Simon bent her mind to his will with his humiliating mastery over her body.
Meghann let her hand trail off the forbidding black door. Even after all this time, she couldn't bear to reenter that room and remember her change from innocent undergraduate to concubine of a power- crazed madman. There was something else she needed to see here, so Meghann closed her eyes and flew up to the rooftop.
"Call Elizabeth."
Though the steely voice made her heart plummet, Meghann kept still and opened her eyes slowly, glaring at the fiend that awaited her in the precise spot where she'd left him to die.
"Never," Meghann said, not attempting to escape but staying well out of striking range. She didn't think Simon would kill her—Ellie would never come back if he did. On the other hand, Simon might torture her in the hopes her pain would bring Ellie running back to her mother's side.
"I should bloody well torture you for procuring your daughter to . .."
"Shut up!" Meghann yelled, no longer frightened but enraged. "I did not procure Ellie to Jimmy Delacroix. I told you everything happened while we were in Chicago."
"So why did you not kill Delacroix the moment you discovered what he'd done to Elizabeth?"
"Because I needed someone by my side when I went to rescue you and Elizabeth. Since Charles was dead and you'd taken Lee for your own futile scheme, I had no one else to rely on but Jimmy."
Something flickered in the depths of Simon's imperturbable gold eyes when she reminded him what his strategy had cost Lee Winslow and his voice lost some of its hostility when he spoke to her again. "You used him so you'd have an ally when you faced Mikal. I understand that, but why is he still alive? You should have destroyed him for violating our daughter. Instead, you hand her to him. Your actions defy reason."
Meghann gave him a disgusted look. "I didn't give Ellie to Jimmy. A statement like that shows you know nothing about her and less about me. My God, you think I wouldn't take apart with my bare hands anyone who hurt Ellie? Jimmy didn't rape Ellie or take advantage of her—they love each other."
"Love?" It was Simon's turn to look disgusted. "What kind of love can there between an innocent child and that pathetic weakling?"
"Jimmy is not weak. He's withstood your every attempt to destroy him—I'd say that shows a great deal of strength." Meghann mentally shook her head, wondering how she'd been maneuvered into defending a relationship she in no way approved of.
"You do not approve?" As he divined her thoughts, Simon seemed less and less angry with her.
"No more than I approve of you reading my mind," Meghann snapped. "But what can I do?"
"What can you do?" Simon echoed incredulously. "You, with all your power, are telling me you could not dispatch that loathsome creature?"
"Your daughter loves that loathsome creature," Meghann said. "Have you thought of what it would do to her relationship with us if we kill her lover?"
Simon's face darkened when Meghann reminded him Ellie and Jimmy were lovers, but his voice had lost all its anger when he spoke to her. "So that is what you meant when you said you didn't want anyone else to die. You worry slaughtering Delacroix would cost us Elizabeth's love? Meghann, we must do what is right for Elizabeth . . . not allow her to destroy herself because we fear to correct her."
"Killing Jimmy Delacroix isn't right! What's right is realizing Ellie is an ad
ult now, capable of making her own choices even if we don't approve of them. For God's sake, Simon. Do you really think Jimmy is going to hurt her? He transformed Ellie—successfully, I might add. That alone shows what a powerful bond there is between them."
Simon's eyes narrowed and Meghann thought she'd finally said something Simon Baldevar couldn't refute. "Don't you see that Jimmy proved what kind of man he is when he charged into Mikal's club to rescue Ellie? Throw away your ridiculous prejudices and jealousies and see Jimmy Delacroix for what he really is—a fine, brave man who loves Ellie with all his heart. He'll never hurt her, and it's over his dead body that anyone else will hurt her. Isn't that enough for you?"
"Elizabeth could do far better than him," Simon replied but here was no heat behind his words. His flat, considering tone gave Meghann hope she might actually accomplish the impossible and get Simon to leave Ellie and Jimmy in peace.
"All Ellie and Jimmy are asking for is a chance. After everything that's happened, can't you at least grant them that?"
Simon turned his back to her, staring at the brightly lit skyline and dark trees of Central Park before he spoke to her again. "He will come before me as a man and ask for my daughter's hand before I consider this. I will not see Elizabeth with some spineless creature that cannot face me to ask for her."
Meghann let out the breath she hadn't even known she was holding, thinking this was as safe as Ellie and Jimmy could be from Simon's wrath. Meghann wondered if she should tell Simon that Jimmy was all for facing down Simon, that it had been her and Ellie who urged him to leave the house once Simon regained consciousness.
"Maggie, "Jimmy had argued before Ellie finally got him to leave. "What are we accomplishing here, me and Ellie going on the run from Baldevar like criminals while you fight my battles with him? This isn't right. Either I confront him head-on or I'm the chickenshit that dickhead likes to think I am."
"Vulgar, if accurately, put," Simon said and Meghann nodced an amused gleam in his eyes as he crossed the roof to come to her side. "Perhaps Mr. Delacroix has some small merits I was not aware of."
"Stay away from me," Meghann said coldly and started for the rooftop door. "I told you what would happen if you ever hit me again."
Meghann reached the heavy aluminum door, intending to leave Simon for good now that she'd gotten him to agree to leave Ellie and Jimmy alone. She grabbed the thin, rusty handle and then fell back in shock, transfixed by what she saw.
"Simon ..." Her voice came out thin and reedy, devoid of fury or any emotion but astonishment. "Simon, look."
She heard swift footsteps behind her and made no attempt to resist when Simon wrapped his hands around her waist. Together, they stared at something neither of them had seen in countless decades—the shadow of the slowly lightening sky illuminating the cracked, rusty door handle.
When Meghann first came up here, the handle was bathed in darkness. Now there was enough light to show each crumbling flake of the rusty handle . . .
light that should have been making her and Simon feel the exhaustion and pain of imminent sunrise. Meghann thought she'd never seen anything as beautiful as that chipping rust growing brighter and brighter with each passing second.
"Simon ..." Meghann said again, his name almost sounding like a prayer as she turned to him.
Simon stared at the door, seeming as transfixed as she was, and then lifted his eyes to the sky, still dark but now deep blue instead of the black that was all vampires could stand seeing.
If careless about the time, a vampire could still be awake in this gray light of the pre-dawn hour, but they felt sluggish and ill, if not in actual pain. Just looking at Simon, Meghann could tell he wasn't experiencing any aches and pains any more than she was.
"Do you think ..." she began.
"I don't know, Meghann." Meghann whipped around at the wonder and humility in his voice—two things she'd never expected to hear from cool, ironic, detached Simon Baldevar.
"I'm scared," she confessed. It wasn't the coming dawn that frightened Meghann but the possibility this was all she'd be allowed to enjoy of it. She couldn't bear to come so close to enjoying sunlight, only to be driven back into darkness once the fiery orange ball rose in the sky.
Simon didn't attempt to soothe away her fears with meaningless words. He merely turned her around and said, "My love," before gently kissing her.
Meghann responded to him, her anger over his behavior when he found out about Ellie and Jimmy forgotten. It was impossible to hate Simon now, to feel anything but cautious hope and a deep sense of thanks that there was someone here to share this moment with her. Only another vampire could understand her joy in watching the burgeoning light chase the shadows from the rooftop and the stars from the sky.
Simon broke off their kiss, and turned her around so they could both view the horizon. Then he opened the rooftop door so they could rush into the dark house should the need arise, and then they leaned against each other, waiting and hoping.
Meghann trembled violently and Simon grasped her tighter as they watched the sky go from purple to navy blue and finally the azure of a new day. Meghann had forgotten what a gradual process the sunrise was, each gradual step so subtle you could miss it completely if you weren't watching with the same avid attention she and Simon were.
She waited for the pain, that bone-deep agony that was the last step before her skin would burn from exposure to sunlight. But the pain never came and all Meghann felt as the sky lightened was the first natural light and warmth on her skin in seventy years.
Finally, the reddish-orange ball of the sun appeared and Meghann trembled from head to toe while her heart rocked in her chest. Every instinct within her screamed at her to run from the killer sun but she took comfort from Simon's hard body supporting her and stood her ground.
Meghann had been wrong about sunrise—it wasn't slow at all. One minute she saw a small ball climbing rapidly in the sky, and the next blinding light bathed the city. She watched the city burst into life and didn't know she was crying until the falling tears tickled her cheeks.
How could she not cry at the miracle she was witnessing, at knowing she could bear the sun as well as a mortal? But what mortal could ever feel as Meghann did, take such delight at seeing colors and life she'd long since forgotten? What mortal knew to appreciate the trees of Central Park, no longer dark sentinels but a brilliant mass of full, green leaves? Meghann had forgotten green, forgotten the natural color of the world that she hadn't seen in so long. At night, all the color went away. How conditioned she'd become to blurred generalities. She'd forgotten the texture and depth of a leaf that wasn't visible by night just as she'd forgotten the sharp gray of the skyscrapers standing impassive and proud against the bright sky.
Simon's hands grasped her shoulders in an almost painful grip and Meghann turned to him, seeing wetness on his face that indicated he must have cried his own tears when he saw the sunrise.
Meghann peered at him closely, looking for the black circles beneath his eyes and ghoulishly white skin that characterized vampires during daylight hours. But Simon looked just as he always did, giving Meghann hope she too looked presentable in the sunlight. All the sun showed her was a man with pale skin, somewhat paler than average but easily explainable as the result of a prolonged illness.
We can walk among the mortals in daylight and not be thought of as unholy monsters, Meghann thought and looked at Simon expectantly but he simply continued to stare down at her.
"You can't read my thoughts, can you?" she asked and he shook his head regretfully.
"I don't believe we'll have our full strength during the day," Simon said and Meghann nodded—she'd expected as much. Mikal had no more strength or power than the average mortal during the day ... a few hours without her magic was a small price to pay for the privilege of seeing the world sparkle to life all around her.
"Ellie!" Meghann said and smiled brightly. "Simon, this is wonderful. I hated the thought of her missing the sun—now she won'
t have to at all!"
"No," Simon said firmly. "She will not drink of our blood just yet."
Meghann was about to ask why not when she realized why Simon wouldn't share the gift of daylight with his daughter—-Jimmy Delacroix. To appease Meghann, Simon wouldn't harm Jimmy but withholding the gift of daylight was his way of expressing disapproval over Ellie's choice of lover.
"Are you going to keep Ellie in the dark until she breaks up with Jimmy?" Meghann demanded.
"Only until I am certain she ... and perhaps Jimmy Delacroix, as well... deserves this gift. Besides, we do not know what drawbacks there are just yet. I am imploring you to wait, Meghann, and not allow our daughter to drink of you behind my back."
"Tell me what promise you made Alcuin and I won't let Ellie drink my blood until you're ready for her to experience daylight," Meghann said, remembering Alcuin's brief visit to her. Alcuin, Meghann thought with a pang. If only he and Charles and Lee could share the sun with her.
Simon gave her a sour grin, wide gold eyes still taking in the beauty of the new day all around them. "I should have known the pontiff would come to you in an attempt to dictate my behavior. The promise he attempted to extract from me was that I no longer slaughter my prey or anyone else except in the name of self-defense."
"Honor it," Meghann said and Simon laughed, an unpleasant, derisive sound.
"Why in the world would I do that?"
"Because we killed our own child," Meghann said quietly and for a moment the world was as dark as it was the night she chose to kill her son to save her husband. "How much more blood can you want on your hands?"
Simon didn't turn away from the sun when he said in a tight voice, "Have you any idea what you are asking of me—that I bend beneath the will of a priest that tried for centuries to control me?"
"What about you asking me to keep the gift of light from my daughter?" Meghann returned. "Please, Simon. At least honor Alcuin's oath while you deny Ellie the sun. Do that and I. . . I'll never bring up Mikal or what happened tonight again."
