by Shea Balik
As much as Kirill hated giving up time with his mate, he could see whatever Harper wanted to do was important to him. “Sure, petal. We’ll spend time together tonight after dinner.”
When his mate pressed a kiss to his lips, Kirill felt like he’d won the lottery. He might be giving up time with Harper, but he’d gained his mate’s trust and that was worth everything to him.
CHAPTER 18
“What are we doing?” Jari asked as Harper led the way to the main house and the only working kitchen in Miracle.
Edrick and his men may have given the only other house in town safe enough not to fall over to Kirill and Harper so he had a safe place to recover, but it didn’t include a working kitchen. At first, the only thing they had was running water. There hadn’t even been electricity.
It wasn’t until Harper had woken everyone in Miracle with his bloodcurdling screams that Edrick had sent someone to pick up another generator and hook up electricity to their house so Harper could have a light to keep the dark shadows of his nightmares at bay. Not that they ever stayed completely away, but at least he now only woke up Kirill and not everyone else.
“I want to make Kirill a pie,” he said as he climbed the porch steps of the Alpha’s house.
“I hope you’re making more than one,” Nole said. “May I suggest apple?” His impish grin was infectious.
The screen door banged shut behind them as they entered the house. “We don’t have any apples,” Jari informed him. “But I do have a couple of cans of peaches.”
There was no way Harper was using canned fruit for the first pie he made his mate. But he didn’t need peaches. He had a plan.
When he entered the kitchen, he made a beeline for the pantry Jari had gotten Chadwick to build him. It was huge. Then again there were seven shifters living in the house. It needed to be big. Checking to be sure he had all the ingredients he’d need to make a crust, Harper went to cupboards that held two large stockpots Jari used for making large quantities of soup stock or considering how much everyone ate, spaghetti.
“Hey guys,” Iniko said as he strode into the kitchen. “I saw you headed this way and figured I’d join you since I’m sick and tired of having to fetch tools for everyone.”
Harper rolled his eyes at his best friend. “Who are you kidding? You love being around all those sweaty men.”
Iniko scowled. “None of them will give me the time of day. I swear, it’s like I have some disease or something.”
Nole snorted. “Yeah. It’s called diarrhea of the mouth.”
Iniko glared at Nole. “Shut it, traitor.” Iniko then turned to Harper. “I thought you hated Nole.”
Since hanging out with Nole while hunting ghosts, Harper had found a way to forgive him for abandoning Harper to his brother. If he were honest, Harper probably would have done the same thing. It just sucked that he’d been the one left behind. “Not anymore.”
To shut his friend up before he ended up offending Nole, Harper shoved one of the pots in his hands. “If you want to help, carry this.” He handed the other pot to Nole. “Okay, I saw some blueberry bushes out by the old farm when we were there yesterday.”
Nole nodded. “I remember. Hudson wouldn’t let you take the time to pick some.”
Nodding, he said, “Right. That’s where you’re headed. If you want enough pies to feed everyone, you three need to fill these pots with as many blueberries as you can.”
Iniko popped his hip out with the pot balanced on it. “Us? What are you going to do?”
Harper was already busy pulling out the couple of pie tins Jari had. “Making crusts. With only two tins, it’s going to take time for me to make enough.”
After his friends left, Harper busily set about making pie crusts. He found some heavy-duty foil in the pantry and used the pie tins to make molds and created his own, homemade pie tins. They weren’t perfect, but they would do in a pinch.
An hour later, when his friends came back with the two pots heaped with blueberries, Harper had ten pie crusts made along with the lattice stripes for the top made and cut. He’d never been so glad that Jari had managed to finagle a second oven as when he started to load each of the pies inside. As it was, he could only manage nine of the pies. The tenth would have to wait, but he figured Jari could take it out when it was ready.
As the pies baked, he helped Jari make dinner. It was the least he could do since he’d taken up Jari’s kitchen for so long.
Nole moaned from his chair as he made a salad for dinner. “Those pies smell so good my stomach is actually growling.”
Harper laughed. “Well, your stomach is going to have to wait.” The pies were nearly done and the aroma filling the kitchen was amazing. Even Harper’s mouth was watering for a taste and he’d gotten to sample the blueberries as he’d made the filling.
“I can’t believe in just another few days I’m going to have a diner,” Jari said. “It feels like I’m walking in a dream.”
Iniko rolled his eyes. “Really? A dream? Slaving away in a kitchen isn’t my idea of a dream.”
“That’s probably because you only know how to burn water,” Harper joked. Iniko had been a great friend. One of the few who had stuck with him even though it was obvious how much Harper’s own father and brother hated him. But the man didn’t know the difference between a stove and an oven.
“Hey,” Iniko protest. “I can microwave with the best of them.”
Harper nearly choked on the water he was drinking. “Then that wasn’t you who thought you could make a hardboiled egg in the microwave?”
Iniko waved a hand at Harper like what he said wasn’t a big deal. “That was only once. How was I supposed to know the egg would blow up?”
“First of all,” Jari said jokingly. “A microwave isn’t cooking, it’s heating up. Second,” he looked pointedly at Iniko. “It’s called a hardboiled egg. I would think the fact that boil is in the name would tell you what you’re supposed to do with it.”
Iniko cocked his head to the side. “You know, I never thought about that. Oh well, lesson learned.”
“And what lesson would that be?” Nole asked sarcastically. “Let others cook for you?”
Iniko nodded his head. “Pretty much.”
The four of them laughed. They might have had a rocky start but they were shaping up to be great friends. It was something he hadn’t had a lot of in his life. Sure, he’d had some friends growing up, but they tended to shy away from him whenever Harper’s family was around.
Not that he could blame them. Iniko had been the only one who hadn’t cared who Harper’s father and brother were. Or the fact that they were assholes.
Now, if he could just figure out how to complete the bond with Kirill without freaking out, Harper might find that elusive happily ever after those fairy tales he’d grown up with coming true.
He glanced at the men he was coming to depend on as friends and figured if there was anyone he could ask, it would be this group. “So, um, I need some advice.”
All three pairs of eyes turned to him with interest. Suddenly feeling nervous, Harper had to take a drink of water just to get his voice to work again. “After…I mean Kirill and I haven’t…” Damn, but this was harder than he thought as he stumbled the second time.
“You’re having trouble having sex after what Abdiel and the guards did to you,” Nole stated matter-of-factly.
Grateful he wasn’t forced to say it himself, Harper nodded. “Yeah. Any ideas how to change that?”
Thankfully the timer chose that moment to go off. Harper grabbed the oven mitts and went to work bringing out his perfectly baked pies while his three friends stood there watching him. Talk about feeling like he was under a microscope.
It wasn’t until he had all nine pies out and the tenth back in the oven with the timer set that he forced himself to face his friends. Considering what Jari had gone through at the hands of Abdiel, Harper was a little surprised to find a mischievous expression on his face.
If
he’d been surprised before, he was shocked when his new friend said, “I have an idea. How are you at tying knots?”
CHAPTER 19
Exhausted, Kirill dragged as he walked up the three steps to the wraparound porch of the home he shared with Harper. It wasn’t exactly the house he would have chosen but beggars couldn’t be choosers. At least it was a house, which gave Harper some of the security he so desperately needed.
Opening the front door, Kirill stopped in his tracks as the tantalizing aroma hit him. He would swear he smelled blueberries, but that had to be impossible. With the closest store more than an hour away, there wouldn’t have been time for Harper to get someone to drive into town and bring them back for him to bake a pie. Because that was what he scented. Blueberry pie.
“Harper,” he called out.
“Shit,” he heard mumbled from the direction of the bedroom. “Kirill, I didn’t know you were home. I’ll be just a minute.” Then there was a loud crash and more cursing.
Not sure what was going on, Kirill started down the hall to the bedroom to check on his mate. But just as he started to turn the knob, the door flew open and a very startled Harper jumped about a foot into the air.
Suspicious when he saw Harper’s flushed cheeks, especially when he seemed to grow redder as Kirill stared at him, Kirill was just about to ask what was going on but Harper stopped him. “I-I-I m-ma-made you a blueberry pie. I-I hope you like it.”
Reminded of the pie that had his mouth watering, Kirill smiled. “You made me a pie?”
Harper nodded and practically shoved Kirill away from the bedroom door before shutting it behind them. That was odd, but as his mate chattered about the fun he had with his friends making several pies, Kirill pushed the questions he had about his mate’s odd behavior to the back of his mind.
He had pie to eat after all. His questions could wait.
“Ta-da,” Harper said with a flourished wave of his hand as the entered the kitchen.
Kirill stood there, mouth hanging open, staring at the small table set for two. There was even a candle glowing in the middle. “You did this?” he asked his mate.
Harper nodded. “Do you like it?” But before Kirill could answer his mate rushed on. “I just thought we could have some more alone time if we ate here instead of with the others. You don’t mind, do you?”
The fact that Harper’s gaze was darting everywhere but at Kirill told him how nervous his mate really was. What Kirill couldn’t quite figure out was why. “I love it, petal,” he said as he gathered Harper into his arms and gave him a gentle kiss. “Thank you for thinking of me.”
That blush that had been there, in the beginning, flushed anew. “I’m glad you like it,” Harper whispered. Then he leaned up and sealed their mouths together for a much longer kiss, one that had Kirill wanting to skip dinner altogether. He just hoped, one day, they would get to that point.
“Let’s eat,” Harper said when he ended the kiss. Kirill swore Harper wore a smirk like he knew exactly how much that kiss affected him. Figuring he was seeing things he wanted instead of what was there, Kirill sat in the chair opposite Harper.
“So, can we start with dessert?” Kirill suggested. The steak, baked potato, and broccoli that was on his plate looked amazing, but it was the pie that had his mouth watering and Kirill was desperate for a taste. He tried to put as much sad puppy dog expression into his eyes as he could just to get his way.
He was even willing to whimper if necessary, but thankfully, Harper laughed and got up from the table to where the pie was on the kitchen counter. When Harper lifted the towel, Kirill thought he might just cry. There, under the towel, was the remains of a mostly eaten pie and about a thousand ants crawling all over it.
“No,” Harper cried out. “Please tell me I’m just imagining this,” his mate whispered.
Kirill wished with every ounce of his being he could. He really had wanted that pie. “I’m sorry, petal. Those ants have really done a number on your pie. Good news is, it must be great because they haven’t even touched any of our dinners.”
Good thing too. Missing the pie was bad enough, not getting to eat at all would have been tragic.
“This can’t be happening,” Harper whispered.
Kirill pulled his gaze from the pie he had been hoping to eat to find tears tumbling down Harper’s cheeks. Pie forgotten, Kirill went to his mate and pulled him into his arms. “It’s okay, petal. I appreciate you trying.”
“It’s all my fault,” Harper wailed. “But when Jari said I should tie you down, I figured that meant I would need to prepare myself. So, I went into the bedroom to stretch myself when I should have stayed in the kitchen and made sure nothing happened to the p-p-piiieee.”
The last word was stretched out but Kirill didn’t pay any attention to that, not when the rest of the statement didn’t make any sense. “Why were you going to tie me down?”
“So we could have sex.” Harper’s crying got even louder. “But I suppose I ruined that, too.” When Harper pushed from Kirill’s arms, Kirill was so stunned by his mate’s statement, he didn’t offer any resistance.
In fact, it took several seconds for his brain to come back online, and even then, all he could think was, “Harper wanted to have sex.”
When he was finally able to have some sort of rational thought again, Kirill asked, “Why did you feel the need to tie me down and how did Jari enter into this?”
Harper was actually berating the ants for eating his pie when Kirill had asked the question but he stopped long enough to say, “Because I’m afraid I will freak out during sex, so Jari suggested I tie you down, that way I’ll be in complete control.”
Kirill pinched himself. He had to be in some sort of weird dream. It was the only explanation for this conversation. Ever since he arrived home something had felt off. From Harper’s strange behavior to the pie, to the ants, and now the conversation. Hell, even Harper’s talking to the ants had to mean this couldn’t be real. Right?
“Are you saying you want to have sex with me?” He had to know. Because if Harper did, the ants could have the pie. Hell, they could have the entire dinner for all he cared.
It was in that moment that Harper must have finally realized what he’d revealed. He turned beet red and started turning this way and that as if trying to find something else to say or do that would distract them both.
In the end, Harper grabbed the pie tin and strode to the door in the back of the kitchen and tossed the whole thing into the yard. “Have your stupid pie, ants. I hope you choke on it.”
Then he slammed the door closed and went back to the sink and grabbed a washcloth and started scrubbing every inch of the counter. Kirill wasn’t sure how long he watched his mate furiously scrub the counter clean, but he wasn’t about to let Harper off the hook that easily, not when it came to their mating.
“Harper.”
His mate stopped scrubbing, his shoulders sagging as if defeated. “Yes, okay. I want to have sex with you. I feel the need to mate just as much as you do, but fear keeps me from acting on it.”
Kirill’s heart broke. He hated his mate having to go through all this uncertainty and anxiety. Silently he cursed Abdiel and prayed he was paying for his sins in the afterlife. But none of that would help Harper.
He closed the few steps between them and pulled Harper into his arms, loving the feel of his weight against him. “If you no longer want sex tonight, I understand. I’m just happy you are thinking about it. Nothing would make me happier than to know, one day, we’ll complete our bond. I love you, petal.”
Harper turned to face him but kept his gaze on Kirill’s chest. “I love you, too. And I want to try, but what if…” His gaze went to the side before he found the courage to look into Kirill’s eyes. “What if I freak out and can’t do it?”
There was so much love for this brave, terrified man inside of Kirill. He cupped Harper’s cheek, stroking his mate’s jaw with his thumb, Kirill leaned down and rested their foreheads togethe
r. “Then we stop.”
When Harper went to open his mouth, Kirill stopped him with a kiss. When he pulled back, Kirill said, “And when you are ready, we’ll try again.” Harper’s brown eyes glistened with unshed tears. “There’s no time limit, no rush. This is about you and me. When it happens, it happens.”
“That’s just it,” Harper whispered. “What if I’m never ready?”
Damn, but his petal knew just how to break his heart into a million pieces. “Then it never happens,” he said. “Either way, you are still my mate, now and forever.”
Their kiss was sweet, soft, and so full of love Kirill could feel it right down to his toes. He’d meant every word, too. Mated or not, Harper was his and nothing was ever going to change that.
CHAPTER 20
Not even in his dreams could Harper have imagined such an amazing mate as Kirill. The man was all the fairytales Harper had read about rolled into one. Except for one big difference. Kirill was very real.
Harper sank into the kiss, loving the way Kirill’s lips felt on his. He could spend all day kissing this man and never tire of it. Then again, every moment he spent with Kirill was like a dream come true. There were times when Harper wanted the world to stop just so he could get a few more minutes with his mate.
When they stopped for much-needed oxygen, Harper said the words he’d been too scared to say until now. “If you’re okay with being tied up, I’d like to try and have sex.”
Shaking, Harper prayed his mate would agree. He knew it was a bit unorthodox but when Jari suggested it, Harper felt the first rays of hope trying to shine through. That didn’t mean Kirill was going to go along with the crazy plan. Harper wouldn’t blame him if he said no because Harper knew there was no way he was ever going to willingly be bound again.
Kirill’s thick fingers brushed against his face and into his hair, soothing some of the anxiety inside of Harper. “Whatever you need, my sweet, precious petal, I will do.”
