by Rye Hart
“I'll be right back,” even though I wasn't sure I actually would be.
I breathed a sigh of relief as I locked myself inside the bathroom stall. Maybe I could feign sickness and sneak back to the room. Maybe I could order room service instead, I thought. That sounded like a great idea and the more I thought about it, the more appealing it became.
With a plan firmly fixed in my mind, I finally brought myself to take a deep breath and exit the stall. I sent Lila and quick text, claiming that I wasn't feeling all that well and that I was going back to the room to go to bed. I knew she'd see right through it. But then, maybe she'd also appreciate a little alone time with her boyfriend. I just needed to get out of there and do everything in my power to avoid Gavin.
Just seeing him again sent shivers down my spine and a flutter through my heart—not to mention through my more intimate parts. Seeing him brought back so many memories, all of them good.
My insides tightened as I remembered the way he'd made me feel that night—the way it felt to have him inside me, and his lips on mine. God, it had been amazing, and I wasn't sure any man would ever live up to him. But, considering the fact that I was pregnant, I wouldn't be getting another chance. Not with Gavin, and likely not with anyone for a good, long while. My child would have to come first.
I opened the bathroom door and slipped out, my eyes on the entrance of the restaurant. Because I was so distracted with trying to keep out of Gavin's line of sight, I wasn't watching where I was headed and ran smack dab into someone—a tall, firm body that smelled eerily familiar.
As soon as the musky scent hit my nose, I knew. I knew I was in trouble even before my eyes moved up to his face.
“There you are,” Gavin said. “Wow, it's so good to see you again, Josie.”
He remembered me. He actually remembered me. I was convinced that I'd been nothing more than a one-night thing and that he'd have forgotten me long before the ship pulled out of port for its next run. Clearly, I'd been wrong. I swallowed hard, and tried to smile, knowing it probably looked as fake as it felt on my face.
“Hi, Gavin,” I said. “What a surprise.”
Gavin took in my face before his eyes moved down the length of my body. I covered my belly with my arms protectively, crossing them in front of me and hoped it was sufficient to hide the growing bulge. He had a curious look on his face when he met my gaze again.
“I spoke to Lila, while you were in the restroom,” he said. “She invited me to join you. I hope that's okay?”
I shot a look in Lila's direction and she waved, a knowing grin on her face. I scowled at her. I would have given her the finger, but that probably would have been more than obvious.
“Oh yeah? That's great,” I forced another smile.
Gavin took my hand in his, which made my pulse race. My heart was beating so hard, I was sure he could feel it through my hand. We walked back to the table together and Lila put her phone away, giving me a wink as we sat down. She'd received my message. She knew I'd been trying to slip away, and that's also probably why Gavin was now sitting at our table.
“Lovely to see you again Gavin,” she said. “And my, what a coincidence.”
However, there was something I could see in her eyes. Something I was having a hard time figuring out. It was kind of a look that said this was far less coincidental than she claimed. Now, though, wasn't the time to ask about it. It was something I'd have to deal with later. The waitress came back with our drinks, “A beer for you,” she said, handing Jason his drink, “A mai tai for you, and just a water for you, miss.”
As she put my water down, Gavin looked at me and cocked an eyebrow, but no one said anything.
“And, Mr. Lemar, would you care for your usual?” she asked him.
Gavin nodded. “That'd be great,” he said. “Thanks, Suzie.”
“Anything for you, boss,” she said before turning to walk away.
Chapter Eleven
Gavin
She was every bit as beautiful as I remembered her to be and my breath caught in my throat the moment I looked at her. Josie's auburn hair was longer now than it had been the last time I saw her. Now, it reached nearly to the middle of her back, and wasn't done up like she'd had it before.
Her natural curls were a bit wilder than the tame ones she'd sported last time, but I liked them better that way. She wore less makeup, which meant her true beauty shone through. Her freckles weren't hidden by concealer, and her clear skin looked clean and soft.
In most every way, she looked remarkably the same. And yet, something was different about Josie. I noticed it when she rushed into the bathroom. My first thought was that she'd put on a little weight. It wasn't until she was standing before me, though, that I noticed all that weight was centered in her belly. She had a bump. Now she was sipping water and avoiding eye contact with me.
I could do the math. If she was pregnant, the timing would mean it’d be mine. Unless she’d slept with other men around the same time. But I knew her better than that. The truth of the matter was that she’d been a submissive little virgin. I was the first and likely the only man she’d slept with during that time. Hell, I may still very well be the only man she’s slept with, period.
“Congratulations,” I remarked to her, my tone a little sharper than I’d intended.
I found myself angry at her. Had she planned to keep my child a secret from me? She looked over at me, her eyes growing large.
“What do you mean?” she asked lamely, speaking slowly.
“You know what I mean,” I said, trying hard to keep my cool.
“I don’t…” she stammered.
Tears welled up in her eyes, and she stood up, pushing the chair completely back from the table and it tipped backward onto the floor with a loud clatter. People turned to look, watching closely. Not one to create a scene, though, I took her hand and tried to keep things from escalating.
“Sh,” I said. “Sit down, Josie.”
I expected her to listen, as she was so submissive the last time I saw her. This time, though, she quickly pulled her hand back from mine and narrowed her eyes at me.
“I don't need you,” she hissed a moment before rushing away.
She hurried out of the restaurant, but I wasn't about to let her get away that easily. Not this time. I followed her out, chasing her down the corridor, calling her name over and over again. I knew she could hear me, but she refused to listen.
“Josie, listen,” I said, grabbing her hand just as she stepped into an elevator.
I stepped inside with her and pushed the Stop button. The doors were closed behind us, but we weren't going anywhere. She had to face me now. There was nowhere she could run.
“Stop, just leave me alone,” she cried, yanking her hand away from mine again. “Like I said, I don't need you. I don't need anyone.”
The sound of her voice cut deep into me. She sounded helpless and afraid, and my instinct was to protect her—to protect our child. I pulled her into my arms and found she didn't pull away. At least not at first. I calmed her down, speaking in calm, soothing tones to her.
“Josie, calm down,” I whispered. “I just want to talk to you, that's all.”
“I don't have anything to say,” she murmured.
Is it my child?”
I already knew the answer to that question. She was a good girl, not the type who slept around. What happened with me was not the norm for a woman like Josie, which was why I'd been drawn to her to begin with. We hadn't used protection, which was my fault. I honestly should have known better. But, caught up in the heat of the moment, I hadn't been using my head. At least, not the one sitting on top of my shoulders. Josie was a virgin and my instinct—my absolute desire—was to feel her from the inside out. And that had made me stupid. Careless.
Josie lifted her head, but wouldn't look at me. I could see the pain and torment in her eyes, though. I knew she was having a hard time coming to grips with this all on her own. I could see the fear and uncertaint
y in her eyes and wanted to take it away from her.
She nodded. “Yes. You’re the only man I’ve ever been with.”
I nodded back at her. “I figured as much.”
I lifted her face, stroking her chin, and stared into her big, baby blue eyes. They were wet with tears, as were her cheeks, and it killed me to see her crying. I hardly knew this woman, but she was carrying my child. Suddenly, my world shifted. Not only did I fantasize about all the ways I wanted to fuck Josie, I suddenly felt like I'd walk through heaven and hell to keep her safe.
“But listen” she said, wiping her tears away and stepping back, “I mean it. I don't need anything from you. You don't have to provide for this child in any way. This is my responsibility.”
“Like hell I don't,” I said. “If it's my kid, I'm going to take care of it. What kind of man do you think I am, Josie? This is much my responsibility as it is yours. Maybe more so.”
She bit her lip. “Honestly? I hardly know you.”
“Well, that's about to change,” I said. “Because like it or not, we're having a kid together,” I said. “Which means, we should probably start getting to know each other.”
“Do you think we can go somewhere to talk? Somewhere more…private?”
“Of course,” I said, pressing the elevator button for the top floor of the cruise ship.
ooo000ooo
“You live here?” Josie asked as soon as we stepped inside my suite. “Like full-time?”
I shrugged. “Most of the time,” I said. “But I have a home in San Diego as well. I just prefer to live at sea most of the time.”
“I don't blame you,” she said.
She'd already seen my bedroom, but I brought her through the front entrance this time. She was getting to see my living and private dining area. My suite came outfitted with a kitchen, just in case I felt like cooking. It went unused most of the time, though. When you have some of the best chefs working for you, why bother?
My living area was mostly ornate wood resembling older ships of times long past. I had a fondness for such things. Bookcases lined two out of four walls, and one wall was open into the dining and kitchen area. The fourth had a fireplace and a flat panel TV above it. Again, not something that was used often, but it was there if needed.
A large, plush couch and an oversized chair were the only other pieces of furniture in the room. I chose them for comfort more than appearance, and from the way Josie ran a hand over the material and smiled, I could tell she appreciated the finer things in life as well.
“So do you work for the cruise line or something?” she asked. “Because it must be a darn good job if you do.”
I laughed and scratched the stubble on my chin. “Ah, well, I don't technically work for them. Most of them work for me,” I said.
“They work for you?”
I nodded. “Yeah, I own the ship.”
She stopped in place, and her smile drooped a bit. She stared at me wide-eyed with her jaw nearly on the floor. It was as if she was having difficulty processing what I'd just told her. Or maybe just trouble believing it.
“You're kidding, right?”
“Not at all,” I said. “I own this boat and I'm in the process of buying a couple of others for the East coast and the Caribbean. Figured that since this one was doing as well as it is, it was time to expand.”
Josie just stood there, staring at me with her gorgeous blue eyes, an inscrutable look on her sweet face.
“As you can see, Josie,” I said, “you don't have to worry about a thing. I'm perfectly capable of taking care of my child. Providing for them. You too, of course.”
“You don't have to—”
“Yes, Josie,” I do,” I said.
I took a seat on the sofa and patted the spot next to me, inviting her to join me. She hesitated, then slowly sat down beside me, rather than taking the chair as I thought she might. It encouraged me a bit and I thought it was a good start.
There was no way I'd let the mother of my child struggle when I had the means to take care of both of them. My dad did that shit with my mother, and I've never forgiven him for it. My mom did well enough for herself, and did everything she could to see that I never went without. But, her life was harder than it needed to be. And I never saw my dad. He didn't contribute anything to our family.
And there was no way in hell I was going to allow the same thing to happen to my child.
Josie smiled at me, a warm, sweet smile. A genuine smile. There was a reason I'd sent those tickets to Lila, and now sitting there, looking at Josie, I was so glad I did. I gave myself a little pat on the back for my ingenuity.
Seeing her sitting next to me, and knowing about the baby—it just sealed in my mind what I already knew in my heart.
Josie Pierce would be mine. There was no question about it.
Chapter Twelve
Josie
Gavin reached out and stroked my cheek with one of his big, strong hands. And despite doing my best to resist, I found myself leaning into his touch. I found comfort in his touch, a sense of belonging even. No man had ever made me feel the way he did. He made me feel safe. Protected. He made me feel wanted and even adored. When I was with Gavin, I felt appreciated.
Maybe it was because he was my first, and I was attaching all kinds of emotions to him that didn't actually exist anywhere but in my mind, but I didn't think so. I believed, deep down in my heart, that what I was feeling was true and it was real.
Getting to know the father of my child was nice, but part of wanted more than that. I didn't just want him to care for us financially—I wanted us to be a family. I wanted everything that came with that. I knew was probably naïve to even consider that. Especially now that I knew his secret. Knowing that he was wealthy and lived a nomadic lifestyle, not to mention all the women he undoubtedly had flitting in and out of his life, I seriously doubted that he wanted to be bogged down with a girl like me.
Even if he did want to care for his child, like he said he did, I assumed it was merely I guess, I had to be okay with that. At least providing for his child was something. Stepping up and taking responsibility for his child like that was a hell of a lot better than a lot of men did these days.
Gavin lifted my face and stared into my eyes. “I've been looking for someone like you, Josie,” he said softly. “I've been looking for a very long time.”
“Someone like me?” I said, cocking my head to the side, genuinely not understanding what he was talking about. “What do you mean?”
“A sub,” he said, and seeing that I was still confused, he continued, “I come across many women leading the particular lifestyle I led. But most of them are only after one thing. Outside the bedroom they're not sweet, kind, and gentle. Not like you are.”
“You only want me because I’m submissive and do what you want me to do?”
I was slightly taken aback by the comment. The idea that I would be controlled, both inside and outside the bedroom, and that was the only reason he wanted me, was something I found a little galling. A little repellent. At the same time, though, the idea of giving myself over to him in the bedroom was such a turn on that I felt myself growing wet just thinking about it. Honestly, there was a part of me that would love to see where Gavin could take me sexually if I gave myself completely over to him.
“No, not at all,” he said, a cocky grin on his lips. “But I have to admit, I do find that part of you incredibly sexy.”
He ran a finger down my face, trailing it all the way down to my cleavage as he licked his lips. When he looked at me, I could see the flames of desire and passion burning in his eyes and I so badly wanted his mouth pressed to mine. Wanted to feel his hands on me. Wanted so much more, but I waited for him to act.
“What do you say, Josie?” he said, his voice low and husky, “Would you like to spend the next week with me, here in my suite, and see where things take us?”
I nodded before I even had a moment to think about it. I knew if I stopped to think, I'd
have a million reasons to say no. But, my body was reacting before my brain could fully comprehend what I was getting myself into. An entire week with Gavin—the father of my child—in his suite, doing all kinds of crazy and delicious things?
My body screamed for it. But my mind whispered to me, asking me what happens if things go badly? What if we couldn't stand each other? What if he decided I wasn't worth his time or effort, and that I wasn't the woman he thought I was? Wasn't actually the woman he'd been looking for?
All those fears used to push me to run away from intimacy. They drove me to escape before I even had a chance to prove them right or wrong. This time, though, I had another reason not to run—and not just because of the fire burning in my belly. I had a child to think about too. A child who could really use having both of his or her parents in their life. At the very least, it was worth trying to see if we could make something work. For our child's sake. I owed our baby at least that much.
Deep down inside me, though, my reasons for wanting to try were less pure. My body yearned for him. Ached for him. Desired him in ways that scared me. And yet it filled me with happiness.
Gavin kissed me, pressing his hot, soft lips to mine. I kissed him back, my hands finding their way to his hair. Months had gone by, and I'd wanted to feel this again—to feel his hands on me, to touch him with my own. For so long, I'd yearned to stroke him, to even just see him. And now there we were, together again.
Gavin grabbed my hands, pulling them from his hair roughly, and yanked me up from the sofa. His eyes were burning with need, as were my insides. As he looked at me with his dark, smoldering eyes, I quivered at the thought of what he was going to do with me.
“Bend over the couch,” he demanded. “Now.”
I did as he commanded, leaning forward and putting my ass in the air for him. It's exactly what Gavin seemed to want from me and as I looked back over my shoulder at him, I saw the desire and hunger on his face plain as day. He'd been wanting this every bit as much as I did.
