by Joyce Alec
"Agnes, the truth is, I am frightened by the thought of marrying the duke. I only dream of being happy, and this arrangement has brought me nothing but sadness."
"M'lady, I’m sure His Grace has some wonderful qualities that will bring you joy. At some point, you might even grow to love him."
"Tis true, Agnes. Thank you for your optimism. Your words have made me feel better."
Lucy smiled at Agnes, and Agnes nodded. However, both women knew there was no truth in Lucy's words.
***
At a quarter to seven, Lucy walked down the grand stone staircase into the great hall. She walked past the oil paintings. Lucy looked into the eyes of her wealthy ancestors and searched for answers that would never come. Lucy wondered if any of them had the same kind of thoughts and struggles that she had. How many of her ancestors' marriages had been arranged? Did any of them find happiness in matrimony? Lucy longed to make her own choices and choose her own future.
The duke had not yet arrived. She walked across the drawing room to join her parents, her brother William, and her sister Margaret. Lucy admired her older brother, William, who was independent, brash, and said what he pleased. He was next in line for his father’s marquess title, so his right to speak his mind was never questioned. William would have a say in who he wanted to marry, and Lucy hoped that William would marry for love.
Margaret, Lucy's younger sister, was a beautiful and meek girl of sixteen. She had blonde hair and big blue eyes, which was a stark contrast to Lucy's brown eyes and brown hair. Lucy considered Margaret to be her opposite in every way, but still, she loved her dearly.
Taking a seat next to her sister on a red upholstered couch by the fireplace, Lucy did not attempt to engage in conversation. She was lost in her own thoughts when her younger sister nudged her.
"Lucy, Papa is looking in your direction. I believe he wishes you to join him. His Grace has just arrived."
"Oh, Margaret, I do not wish to marry the duke. My heart aches, and I just don't think I can bear to wear a smile that does not show my true feelings."
Margaret brought her hand to her mouth in shock, "Lucy, you must be quiet. What if somebody had heard you?" Margaret tried to console her sister, "You will be a duchess, and the duke seems kind. Imagine what other women would do to be in your shoes."
"Well, those women can have my shoes, and my future title," she sighed as she stood up to join her parents.
Lucy shuddered involuntarily as she approached the duke and tried to pass her reaction off as just being cold. She curtsied, and he bowed.
"Lady Lucy, how lovely to see you again. I have been looking forward to this visit since we last met."
"What kind words, Your Grace. Thank you. I have been looking forward to your visit, as well," said Lucy as she smiled, knowing she was telling a falsehood.
The Duke of Selby was seated next to Lucy at dinner. Determined to make the best of the situation, Lucy tried to find something they had in common.
"Your Grace, I hope your journey was pleasant."
"Lady Lucy, please call me Robert. We are to be married, so I would like to do away with such formalities."
"Very well, Robert. I must insist that you call me Lucy."
"Nothing would make me happier, my dear."
And with that exchange, the conversation ended for several minutes. Lucy didn't know how to engage the duke, but once again, she tried to start a conversation.
"Robert, have you read any books that suit you recently?"
"Ah, I do enjoy reading, but business has kept me quite busy as of late, so I am afraid I have not had time to enjoy a good book."
Lucy offered her opinion on a book she had read, and the duke cut her off mid-sentence to speak to the woman sitting next to him. He yelled at one of the footman for standing too close to him, and he embarrassed the butler after screaming at him for a small mistake. Lucy finally gave up and said a silent prayer for the meal to end as soon as possible.
After a grueling three days, the duke finally returned home. Lucy had joined the duke for walks in the garden and dined together in the evenings with Lucy's family. Although Lucy had originally thought he was kind, she now found him to be arrogant and rude. He treated the staff poorly and showed no interest in Lucy's talents or interests.
Chapter 4
A week had passed since the duke's visit, and Lucy finally felt her body relax. She hadn't realized that every muscle in her body was holding the tension that her heart felt. Time alone would help her clear her thoughts. Lucy headed to the stables to find Mabel.
Lucy adored being outside and loved to go riding at every opportunity. It was late September, and the weather was comfortable with a slight chill to the air. When she was alone with Mabel, she could let go of all her cares. The wind against her face and the sun warming her skin made her worries disappear. She didn't want the moment to end.
Mabel was getting tired, so Lucy headed home. She left her horse in the capable hands of a stable boy and walked into the great hall of family's estate. As she was heading for the staircase, Lucy was intercepted by her mother.
"Lucy, I have delightful news."
"What a pleasant surprise, Mama. I could use some good news."
"The duke is hosting a house party, and we are to join him in a fortnight. What a wonderful opportunity for you to see your new home."
"How lovely, Mama."
With that, Lucy turned and ran upstairs to the sanctuary of her room. The muscles in Lucy's body tightened as she felt the tension return. The tears were streaming down her face, and Lucy couldn't stop them. The thought of sharing a life—and a bed—with the duke took control of her emotions. She had already begged and pleaded to be released from the promise of marriage, but her parents said it was too late do such a thing.
***
The day had arrived, and Lucy's family was on their way to the duke's country estate. The trip was long and uncomfortable. Lucy was heartbroken, as was evident in her demeanor and actions. Lucy didn't even try to hide her disappointment in front of her family.
Lucy's brother, William, even tried to talk to their father on Lucy's behalf. It pained him to see his sister in such turmoil, and he kept telling Lucy how sorry he was that he couldn't put a stop to the marriage. William blamed himself, but Lucy consoled him and told him it was their parents' doing. Both of Lucy's siblings were sympathetic to her predicament, but her parents insisted it was for the best.
Lucy and her family arrived at the grand country estate. They were met in the great hall by the duke and his children. They ranged in ages from twenty-five to ten. A sick feeling came over Lucy as she imagined being a stepmother to her future husband's children. Lucy had always wanted children of her own, but she had never dreamed of being forced into a motherhood this way.
Lucy noticed that the heir to the dukedom, Lord Pearson, was entirely different from his father. His actions were gracious, kind and very welcoming towards Lucy. He was tall, handsome, and strong in stature. Lord Pearson was five years Lucy's senior, so she imagined him to be more like a big brother than her future stepson. She hoped that they would get along well and possibly form a friendship.
When Lord Pearson was introduced to Margaret, Lucy noticed an immediate attraction between the two. His eyes fixated on Margaret, who returned his gaze with a smile. Lord Pearson's confidence waned as he stumbled over his words. Margaret made him nervous. Lucy smiled at the encounter and winked at her sister when Lucy caught Margaret's eye. Margaret’s cheeks reddened with embarrassment.
As Lucy was shown to her room, she was overwhelmed by the size of the house; it was enormous. She had never been in a house to match its opulence or size. After seeing the house, it made perfect sense why Lucy's parents arranged the marriage; it was enormous. Lucy admitted to herself that the money and estates were tempting, but the man she would have to marry made the offer unattractive.
Lucy was wealthy, and her family lived in a grand house that was considered one of the most beautiful in
Yorkshire, yet her bedroom would fit three times over in her bedroom in the duke's estate. The footman brought up her trunks, and Agnes unpacked them.
Unable to relax, Lucy went to the door and checked the locks, and then just to be sure, checked the window latch as well. She looked at Agnes and thought for one brief second that Agnes was trying not to laugh.
"M'lady, I doubt you have to worry about him coming in the window. Although, I am sure he has a key to the lock; this is his house."
Lucy couldn't hold back her smile, although the situation was not funny. Agnes was fully aware of Lucy's grievances, but as a servant, she never spoke poorly about the duke. But in this situation, Agnes was right. Lucy's attempts to lock herself away were futile.
"Agnes, please lay out the coral dress for this evening." Lucy added, "And, I am afraid you are right about the door."
Lucy had selected the coral evening gown because she had never liked it. She always thought the color made her look pale, and it looked ghastly with the coloring of her hair. She hoped the duke would think so as well and ward off any attraction he had to her.
***
Later that day, Lucy returned to her room from tea with her mother and other party guests. She was surprised to see a stunning emerald green evening gown with a low-cut neckline and green beading laid out for dinner. Lucy did not recognize the dress and immediately wanted to know what had happened to the coral dress she requested. She rang for Agnes, who arrived several minutes later.
"Agnes, where is the coral dress? I specifically requested the coral dress for this evening."
"M'lady. Your mother insisted upon this dress and took the coral dress with her. I couldn't refuse her ladyship. Please don't be cross with me."
"Of course I am not upset with you, Agnes. I guess my only option is the green dress," sighed Lucy.
The dress was breathtaking, and with the vibrant color and the neckline, she was sure to get noticed. Lucy didn't want the attention.
Agnes styled Lucy's hair with intricate twists and beautiful silver combs. The dress accentuated her slender frame and gentle curves. Any hopes of playing down her beauty were shattered.
When Lucy arrived in the drawing room to meet her parents and the duke, she felt all eyes on her. As the duke's fiancé, she would be meeting his friends and family members during their stay. To appease her parents, Lucy would play the part. She would smile, laugh at jokes, and act humble as her mother shared Lucy's accomplishments in music and poetry. She was well-bred and was perfectly aware of how to act as the future duchess.
After being introduced to nearly every guest, Lucy needed time to herself. She excused herself to go outdoors for some fresh air. The duke asked to accompany her, but Lucy politely declined his offer and promised she would be back shortly.
Before reaching the exit, which led to the balcony, Lucy helped herself to a cup of punch that a footman offered. As she stepped outside, she noticed a man gazing off into the garden. Upset that she would have to go back indoors, she sighed and turned around.
The man turned and saw Lucy, "Pardon me, my lady. I did not see you."
Lucy's heart stopped as she recognized the voice. She turned and looked into the eyes of the Earl of Harrogate. At a loss for words, Lucy turned and exited the balcony. What was he doing there? How did he know the duke? Did he recognize her?
The questions flooded Lucy's mind. Standing in front of her was the man she had been dreaming about since that serendipitous day. Lucy returned to the drawing room, just in time for dinner to be announced.
Throughout the meal, Lord Harrogate looked in the direction of Lucy, careful not to stare at her for too long. Nobody noticed the attention he was giving to Lucy, except Lucy. Every time his gaze fell upon her, she felt her body warm, as if they had a special connection. After several glances, Lucy looked in the earl's direction and offered a smile but quickly looked away so no one would notice the interaction.
After dinner, the men rejoined the ladies in the drawing room, much to the dismay of Lucy. The duke treated his own staff worse than he had treated her family's staff when he had visited. Some of his comments were vulgar, but his guests seemed to dismiss his disgraceful behavior because he was the duke.
He was eager to show off Lucy to his guests, almost as if boasting of his good fortune. Lucy was embarrassed, as she imagined the women gossiping behind her back. She knew that some of the women wished they were marrying the duke, and others saw Lucy as a fortune chaser. She wanted to scream that her engagement wasn't her choice, and she had no desire to be the duchess.
Lucy dreaded the moment that she would be introduced to Lord Harrogate. Would he pretend he didn't know her? Would he recount the story of their meeting? Lucy was unsure as to why they had not been formally introduced yet, but she imagined it was her mother's doing. Lucy assumed the marchioness didn't want anything to get in the way of Lucy's marriage to the duke.
When Lucy was sure that nobody was looking, she snuck out of the drawing room. An unlocked door proved to be her escape. She walked inside and quietly closed the door. Lucy shut her eyes and felt her heart racing. The unmistakable sound of a man clearing his throat surprised Lucy, and she opened her eyes immediately to see who had caught her in the act of escaping.
Lucy looked around for the source of the sound and realized she had made her way into the billiard room. Lord Harrogate was looking at her, a questioning look on his face. Lucy remained silent and waited for him to speak first.
"Lady Lucy Fitzwilliam, it is good to see you again."
"Lord Harrogate," she said, curtly.
"Are you all right? You look…frightened," he said, sounding concerned.
"Thank you, Lord Harrogate. I assure you everything is fine."
When Lucy heard footsteps approaching, she panicked and raced behind the billiard table and crouched down by Lord Harrogate.
The door opened, and the Duke of Selby stood in the doorway.
"Harrogate, why are you in here alone? Come join the party! By the way, you haven't seen Lady Lucy by any chance, have you?"
Lord Harrogate looked down where Lucy was hiding. She shook her head.
"No, Your Grace, I have not, but I doubt you will find her in here."
"I do believe you are right," laughed the duke.
The door closed behind the duke. Lucy waited for a moment before she stood up and walked to the opposite side of the billiard table.
"I suppose I should thank you," she said quietly.
"I always seem to be saving you," he said with a smile.
"It seems as though nothing will save me from this marriage," she said as she turned to leave.
After the words had left her mouth, Lucy knew she should have kept them to herself, but she didn't care. After getting a breath of fresh air, Lucy returned to the drawing room to say goodnight to the duke and his guests. She avoided Lord Harrogate, who also avoided her.
That night Lucy stayed in her sister's room. Lucy poured out her feelings to her sister, and with nobody else around to hear them, Margaret consoled Lucy as she cried. Lucy shared the story of meeting Lord Harrogate and Margaret was shocked. Their parents had told Margaret that Lucy was visiting their cousin, the Vicar, and his wife. Margaret had no idea that Lucy had been in such an awful predicament.
When Lucy had no more tears, she asked Margaret about Lord Pearson.
"Oh Lucy, I do not feel that I can share my excitement when your romantic life is in such peril. Please, ask me another time."
Lucy took Margaret's hands in hers, "Margaret, my sadness should never take away from your happiness. I do wish to hear any good news you wish to share. In fact, I could use a good love story to lift my spirits."
"A love story?" Margaret laughed. "But we have only just met."
"I noticed him looking at you all night. And he is quite handsome," beamed Lucy.
"Well, since you asked, Lord Pearson did ask if he could take a walk with me tomorrow. Papa agreed."
Trying to make light
of the situation, Lucy said, "Can you imagine if you marry him, Margaret? I will be your mother-in-law."
Both women laughed at the situation.
***
The following morning, Lucy crept back into her room and dressed without Agnes's help. The men left early that morning for the day's activities, so Lucy was able to avoid the duke. Her stomach in knots, Lucy only managed a cup of tea and a piece of toast for breakfast.
Some of the women were in the drawing room, while others had retreated outdoors for a walk through the gardens. Lucy found solace in the study and made herself comfortable at a desk in a quiet corner of the room. She had told her mother that she had letters to write, but instead she stared out the window.
The door to the study opened quietly, and she looked around for an escape. She was in a corner and with nowhere to run. When Lord Harrogate noticed Lucy, he turned to leave the room but changed his mind.
"Lady Lucy, this is not my business, and I do not want to pry into your private affairs, but you seem to be in trouble."
"Why do you say that, my lord?" Realizing that Lord Harrogate should be with the men, Lucy questioned why he wasn't on the hunt.
"I should enjoy hunting, but I don't, so I chose to stay here. The duke was a close friend to my father, so he continues to invite me to his parties. I have been away, but before that, I typically declined the invitations," said Lord Harrogate. "As luck would have it, I decided to accept the invitation this time around. And because of that, I have been fortunate enough to see you again."
"Fortunate? Why is that, my lord?"
"To be honest, I haven't stopped thinking about you since we met."
Lucy's heart fluttered with excitement, but she knew nothing would come of the infatuation. "You do realize that I am engaged to your host, the duke."
"Yes, I am aware, but I don't understand why. May I speak candidly, my lady?
"Of course," said Lucy.
"When I met you, I believed it wasn't a chance meeting. Your compassion for the poor and your willingness to take them food and provisions on your own accord are remarkable qualities. And then, you almost risked your life for your horse. I didn't believe that a woman like you existed." Lord Harrogate continued, "I enquired about you but heard you were engaged to the duke. I do not mean to speak ill of His Grace, but he does not share the same good nature as you."
