“See you on the other side,” Amy said, disappointed.
“You don’t want to go on the ride?” Mrs. Taylor asked when she noticed Cole in her wake.
“No, I think I’m gonna sit this one out,” he said.
“Okay, well, I’m going to sit on one of the benches at the exit to wait for everyone to get off. Come join me there.”
Mrs. Taylor and Cole sat together to watch the coaster navigate its frantic course and listen to the screams, both thankful to not be one of the unfortunate passengers.
Blink, cough, touch your knee and swallow before the coaster reaches the end of its run.
Amy is on that car! He followed the instructions as inconspicuously as possible so as to not draw any attention to himself. He was trembling as he went through the motions, breathing a deep sigh of relief as he finished. He kept his eyes glued to the coaster to make sure nothing happened. He had a terrible feeling that, like the train, something bad was about to happen.
For some reason, another kid about his age caught his attention. Cole could never be sure what it was that caught his eye, whether it was the kid’s intent stare at the roller coaster or some other factor, but when the coaster pulled into the station, the kid’s shoulders drooped as if he was also expecting something that never came. This struck Cole as odd and he watched the kid’s back for a few seconds, analyzing, trying to make heads or tails of him. Something struck him as not quite right, but he couldn’t put his finger on it. He thought he might have heard some little voice in the back of his head, but it was only a whisper.
Almost as if the kid could feel Cole’s stare, he turned around. Their eyes met and held for a long moment before the woman with him, presumably his mother, grabbed hold of his arm and led him away.
Cole became aware that someone was calling his name.
“Cole? Cole?” It was Mrs. Taylor. “We need to go. They're getting off the ride.”
“Huh? Yeah, okay.” He could not shake the chill that was making the hairs on the back of his neck prickle. He had no idea why he felt like this. The kid had just given him an innocent glance. He had been pretty average looking, with brown hair in a standard crew cut and a beat up gray hoodie. Nothing about his demeanor stood out as unusual, but nonetheless, Cole was unnerved. He shook it off as Amy came running up to them.
“Oooo Cole, you should have done that one! You would’ve loved it. It’s sooo much fun. I’m hungry. Mrs. Taylor, can we have lunch?”
Mrs. Taylor smiled. “Of course.”
While they took a lunch break, Amy described every single dip, twist and loop that Cole had missed and then went on to tell him about every other ride she wanted to go on that day.
“I take it you’ve been here before?” Cole interjected after Amy had finished demonstrating how the third loop of one of the coasters was the best one.
“Oh yes, many times,” she said. “My family comes here a few times a year. I have this park almost memorized. Are you sure you’re going to sit out for the rest of the day? That's lame. You should give it another shot. You just have to get used to it.”
“If the others are anything like the first, I’m going to have to pass.”
Amy pouted. “Okay. I’ll go on a smaller ride with you later. What would you like, the merry-go-round?” She smirked. “Joking. Joking. We’ll find something.”
“Lunchtime is over,” Mrs. Taylor announced. “Let’s go kids.”
They all marched off to the next ride. The day continued in a similar fashion, Cole growing continuously more bored as the day wore on.
“The next one will be for you,” Amy said as she got on one of the last coasters in the park. “Pick a ride you wanna go on before I come back. See ya.”
Cole and Mrs. Taylor took up their usual spots on the bench by the exit.
“Are you having fun?” Mrs. Taylor asked. “You can choose the last thing we do before we leave. I don’t want your day to be a waste.”
“It’s okay,” Cole said, “and besides, I wouldn’t even know what to go on. I doubt I’d like anything here.”
“Just pick an activity and we’ll do it before you go. Everyone else has had their share already and we need to leave soon. There has to be something you want to try.”
“Um, I guess I could go on the bumper cars.”
“It’s a deal,” Mrs. Taylor said.
When the group returned to them, Mrs. Taylor traipsed them all along in the direction of the bumper cars, which she announced would be the final activity, to a number of groans and complaints. Cole was thankful she did not mention the reasoning behind this decision.
All of a sudden, he felt a strange prickling sensation and turned his head to see the same kid staring at him. He was standing in line at a concession stand with his mother and his eyes bore into Cole’s with such intensity that Cole could practically feel them inside of him. Many people had stared at him in his life, but this was different. There was an undeniable connection between this boy and him, one that could not be put into words. The whispering in Cole’s head had returned tenfold, an indecipherable frantic murmur that magnified as they drew closer. For just a second, as Cole passed by, the whisper became audible.
…is an agreement that... touch the... so that they... before it…
Cole’s mind froze. He was two feet away from the boy, each of them looking into the others’ eyes and not moving. A barrage of random words assaulted his brain.
Coaster…swallow… during…quick…twitch…
The stare intensified for a split second and then Cole had passed the boy. Cole's feet had carried him on their own. He heard his name and the trance was broken. He snapped his head forwards and hurried to catch up to his group.
“No lagging,” Mrs. Taylor said. “Please try to keep up.”
“You know that boy?” Amy said.
“Umm, no,” Cole said. “He was just giving me a weird look.” He was trying his best not to show how shaken he was, but he was afraid his voice betrayed him.
“You should kick his butt.” She giggled. “Ooo, hey, we’re here! And no line!”
They had arrived at the bumper cars. Amy raced off to have first choice of the cars while everyone else strolled inside and sat in the closest car he or she found. Cole had never admitted it to anyone, but the bumper car ride had always intrigued him. It was the only ride where he had some control and it was the closest he could ever come to driving at his age. Under normal circumstances he would have been excited, but petty pleasures were meaningless right now. The kid’s face was imprinted in his mind, particularly the eyes which penetrated deep into his consciousness.
A sudden jolt from behind brought him back to reality. “You have to hit the gas pedal!” someone shouted. There was laughter. Cole had not even realized the ride had started. Embarrassed, he shot his car forwards into the fray. He feigned enjoyment for the rest of the ride, but when it was over, he could not remember a moment of it. All he could do was wonder. He had an idea who the kid was, but the thought terrified him. He racked his brains, trying to think of a better explanation, one he could at least accept.
“Wasn’t that so much fun?” Amy squeaked after the ride ended.
Cole gave a noncommittal grunt.
“What’s wrong with you today?” she asked. “You’re so out of it.”
“I’m fine,” he said. “That was a lot of fun.”
“I’m sorry I told you to come. I thought you’d like it.” She sounded small and pathetic as her focus shifted to her feet.
“No, no, it’s not that. I really did have fun. I think I’m just worried about my mother.” Half truths are always the best lies.
“Oh, yeah,” Amy said. “Sorry. Glad you had fun. Did it help take your mind off it?”
“Uh-huh. I actually always wanted to try bumper cars.”
“And now you can say you were on a roller coaster.” That smile was back.
Now it was Cole who was looking down. “Yeah, there’s that.”
“Oh
man... time to go home. Worst part of the day. I guess I'll see ya later.”
“Yep, bye.”
All the groups from the school had met up and Amy trudged back to her original chaperone. He caught sight of her again outside as the parents arrived to pick them up. She ran up to a man who was standing next to an expensive sports car convertible and wearing sunglasses and a business suit. Cole felt a sharp pang as he watched the man hug her and then they got into the car and drove away. For the second time since that night Amy came over, he felt an emptiness he knew nothing could ever fill.
And in a second it was gone.
“Cole! Cole! Over here!”
Cole spun around in shock. “Mom? Mom!” He bolted over to where she stood by her old beat up Toyota. He ran into her so hard he nearly knocked her off her feet and threw his arms around her. “I thought you were going to tell me when you were getting out.” He buried his face in her jacket and then, remembering where he was, let go.
“Easy, easy,” Meredith said, gently pushing Cole back to arm’s length. “It was a surprise to me too. The doctor ran some tests and said I was good to go. He had mentioned the possibility of going home before, but I didn’t want to give you false hopes.”
Cole looked up into his mother’s flushed face, only now realizing how fearful he had been for her safety. “I wanna go home.”
“I figured as much. Come on.”
9
Life returned to a degree of normality after that, but never reverted completely to the way it was before. Meredith appeared cured although Cole did notice her occasionally trying to hide a moment of weariness. She seemed to lean on things – tables, chairs – more than she should have to. Still, her excitement at being back home with Cole was the most noticeable aspect of his mother's change in behavior. She cooked an elaborate dinner that night, more courses than either one of them could fathom finishing, and made an obvious extra effort to engage in conversation.
“How’s school going? Did you have fun on your trip?” Meredith asked during the fourth course.
“It was good,” Cole said, not wanting to lie and not wanting to get into it. “Things have been going great with Amy,” he added, steering the conversation in a better direction.
“Oh, I didn’t want to say anything in case you didn’t want to talk about it. You were with her today?”
“Uh huh. Found out she's a little out of her mind today. But not in a bad way.” His eyes were wide as he remembered the experience. “She's just completely obsessed with being flung around wildly by those monster coasters.”
“A roller coaster?” Meredith said, failing to hide the shock and worry in her voice. “Did you go on them too?”
“I tried one. Let's just say it's not really my thing.” Cole stuffed his mouth with a huge bite of food to show he did not want to elaborate on that statement.
An expression of humor appeared on Meredith's face. “Can't say I'm too upset to hear that.” She took a bite of food and chewed it slowly. “So, have you only hung out outside of school that one time at Aunt Beth's?”
Cole paused for a second, wondering if his mother was implying something. “Yeah, so far. Should I ask her to come over tomorrow so you can meet her?”
“Definitely. I’m very curi... I mean, it would be nice to meet her.”
“As long as you don't embarrass me,” Cole said jokingly.
“Of course not. When have I ever?” Meredith said in mock innocence.
Cole was uncomfortable showing emotion so he kept to himself, reading Les Miserables in his comfort zone like he always did, hoping his actions didn’t offend his mother. She didn’t seem to mind.
The next day at lunch, Cole asked Amy if she wanted to come over to his real house.
Her eyes lit up as she nodded a vigorous yes. “Totally. I've been really, um... bored at my house lately. It'd be great to get out.”
“My crazy aunt didn't scare your mom away?”
“Nah, doesn't matter how crazy she is. My mom is always happy to have me go over to someone's house.”
“Man, good, I was super worried about it. I really hate her sometimes. After your mom met her I was positive she'd never let you see me again. Your mom must be awesome. If she could put up with that, she can put up with anything.”
Amy gave a half smile. “Yeah, I s'pose.”
“Oh, and I promise my mom is way more normal.”
The smile spread across her face. “You worry too much.”
They met up and waited for her mother after school for a repeat of last week. Amy’s mother showed up, looking as pristine as ever, flashing a bright smile at the sight of her daughter. She was exuberant, if a little tentative, at the mention of plans with Cole, but looked somewhat relieved when they explained that it would be with Cole’s actual mother this time.
“Don’t worry, she’s nothing like my Aunt Beth,” Cole said, chuckling at Mrs. Brown’s expression of worry.
Mrs. Brown retained some measure of tentativeness as she approached Meredith’s car. “Hi, Mrs., umm…,” she started, racking her brains, wondering if she ever knew Cole’s last name. She kept her distance from the car, just bending slightly to see inside the low window.
“Call me Meredith,” Meredith said, extending her hand through the window.
Mrs. Brown looked startled but recovered enough to shake her hand. “Hi, I’m M…, uh, Sandy. I met your, umm…”
Meredith laughed. “Don’t worry about my sister. She’s grown into quite the eccentric character. Harmless, but definitely eccentric.”
“Yes, well, nice to meet you. Your son and Amy wanted to get together tonight. If it’s fine with you I can drop her off anytime tonight.”
They made plans and Amy left with her mother. Cole heard Mrs. Brown whisper to Amy something about “like her much better” before they got out of earshot. As he climbed into the passenger seat, an agreement flashed into his head, freezing him partway through the door.
Get in your seat, swallow, then stretch your legs before your mom says anything or Amy won’t come over tonight and something bad will happen to her.
Cole flung himself into the seat, simultaneously trying to work saliva into his mouth and to the back of his throat. But it wouldn’t go down. Why is my throat so damned dry? He maneuvered ferociously, trying to make his throat do something it was not intended do. In one last painful flex of muscles he forced himself to dry swallow, feeling like he just ingested a box of cotton.
“Are you all right?” Meredith said, watching his little spectacle, the car’s passenger door still open.
“Yeah, just got something caught in my throat.” NOOO. I didn’t get a chance to stretch my legs. That was the easy part. Dammit Mom! Dammit…
“Well, can you close the door so we can get out of here?”
Cole nonchalantly closed the door, but he could feel cold sweat and the tumult of his insides. I love you Mom, but goddammit. He refused to think of the implications of what just happened, but the vivid memory of the failed agreement for his mother kept whizzing by. Then, in his desperation, a thought came to him, an idea that he could not believe he had never thought to try before. If it worked it would have rescued him in the past – again he thought of his mother – and it would be a panacea for the future.
Clear your throat three times to undo the last agreement, he thought to himself. He did it. If I can’t win an agreement, I’ll make up my own to counteract it.
Move that muscle for the same reason as the last one.
Swallow when Mom is not talking for the same reason.
Move this…do that…say that… and so it went for a few minutes, nullifying the effects of the failed agreement, until Cole was satisfied that his efforts, if they did anything, would work. All that was left to do was pray, because if this worked he could never lose again.
“She seems like a nice girl,” Meredith said, bringing Cole back from his own world.
“Yeah, she’s cool,” he said, trying to push his external calm on
to his internal frenzy. He was still feeling defeated, but at least there was a glimmer of hope to hold on to.
“I knew you could make friends, no problem. I’m really happy you broke out of your shell. Not that you weren’t great before, but what I mean is I’m sure you can already see the advantages -”
“Mom, I know. Don't make a big deal out of it.”
“Sorry. I'll try, but I am your mother. Kind of my job.” She glanced over at Cole as she drove, but he was staring out the window. “I just wanted to make sure you were happy about it. Sometimes I can't tell with you.”
“It's cool. I understand. But trust me, I'm happy about it.”
All evening, no matter what he tried to do to distract himself, he was reminded of the fated agreement that would soon be proven one way or another. He watched the minutes slowly tick by, praying that Amy would show up any second, happy and unharmed. He wished he could do more, but he felt helpless beyond what he already tried.
“Are you nervous about her coming over?” Meredith asked him.
Blinking away his daydream, he looked up at his mother standing over the chair. “What do you mean?”
“Well… you’ve been sitting in this chair for an hour not doing anything. That’s very unlike you. You must be thinking about something.”
“Yeah, that must be it,” Cole said. He slumped back into his chair to stare at the clock.
Around the time Amy was supposed to show up, the phone rang. Cole’s ears perked up, his heart beating rapidly, as he listened with bated breath.
“Hello?... Yes. Speaking… Oh, that’s too bad… Maybe another time then… Not a problem… Okay. Bye.”
Cole’s heart sank. That had to be Mrs. Brown. At least it didn’t sound like anything happened to her. “What happened?” he called into the other room.
“I’m really sorry,” Meredith said, “but Amy isn’t going to be able to make it tonight.”
“What, why not?”
Meredith frowned, thinking back over the phone conversation. “Her mother didn’t say why. Just said she’d need to reschedule.”
Dark Mind (The Dark Mind Trilogy Book 1) Page 7
