The shining scales, the delicate claws, the glittering eyes, the luminous wings!
There is nothing monstrous about such beauty.
*
My sisters want to help me. They tell me a secret that I have entrusted to them at another time, not so long ago, when I wore a slightly different human form.
The secret brings me exquisite joy. Exquisite pain.
I remember!
A shift in reality. A swirl of different lives.
Red on white.
Blood on snow.
*
It would be unwise to remember this secret when I am in my human form. The girl is remarkably strong but very young, yet, and far too emotional. She will put us both in danger.
Both him and me.
A flash of ruby, emerald, sapphire, amber.
We will help you to forget, my sisters tell me. We will spin a soft thread around your mind, delicate and beautiful, so that the girl will only remember when the time is right. For now, the most important thing is to save the one who has become her friend. His mind is almost broken, and she will need him if she is to become what we all know she must.
I sing my gratitude to them.
How could I ever, even in a million lifetimes, return a favor so great?
*
I can.
I can return the favor tonight.
All I need to do is to tell him.
All I need to do is make him see.
All I need to do is make him believe.
Chapter 5
Today, very little is known about the Pendragon women, more commonly known as the so-called ‘half-dragons’. What we do know is that after adolescence the women are rarely, if ever, seen in public, and that the Pendragon men have found a way to utilize their powerful magic by controlling their mindless, doll-like human bodies.
From A Brief History of The Order of Keepers (1961), by Harry Charles Shawcross.
It is only when I enter the Pendragon mansion that I remember I am me.
As soon as I step into that dark fortress of metal and brick and stone, my dream of happiness ends and I’m yanked back to a reality that I cannot deny and cannot accept.
Two men escort me to my bedroom suite, but it’s only when I open the door and see our reflections in the heavily framed mirror on the wall that I remember who they are. Who I am.
Jess. Jonathan. Zig.
I stare into the mirror while I try to anchor myself to this world again. My hair is wet, I notice distractedly, and Zig, for some reason, is not wearing a shirt. I stare in fascination at the huge tattooed dragon that snakes itself around his chest all the way to his back, covering a body full of old scars, horrible jagged marks that—
“Don’t touch me!”
I pull my hand back. “I’m sorry. I wasn’t thinking.” Then I look up into his silver eyes, perplexed. “What happened to you? Who hurt you like this?”
The only answer I get is a vicious curse before he storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
I turn to Jonathan who is staring at me in that way he has: all glittering eyes and wicked smiles and lazy confidence.
“No,” I say, remembering. “Stop that. I asked you before.”
He laughs. “I’m not doing it on purpose, okay? I can’t help it, it’s an automatic response to your dragonshine.”
“I’m shining?”
Another laugh. “Yup.”
I look at my reflection in the mirror, but I can’t see anything different. Hmm. Perhaps my eyes are a bit greener than usual. My hair too. And I’m wearing a peculiar, very short dress.
“What is this?” I ask, pulling at the material, trying to get it to cover a bit more.
“You can’t remember?”
“Remember what?”
He grins. “You refused point-blank to get dressed after you got out of the lake. You even chucked your clothes into the bushes because you thought the water glittering on your skin was ‘holy’ and ‘beautiful’.”
“Really?”
“Zig basically had to wrestle you into that shirt.”
I look down. “This is his?”
“Afraid so.”
As I pull at Zig’s shirt again, a part of me realizes that something about this bizarre tale might disturb me tomorrow. Right now, however, I have far more important things to worry about.
“Jonathan. I need to tell you something.”
“This isn’t the best time.” He takes a step toward the door. “You’re shining too brightly; you’ll soon wake the whole house, and your keepers will lose their shit if they find me here.”
“No.” I put a hand out to stop him. “What I have to say is far more important than any discomfort your presence may cause my keepers. Please sit down. This cannot wait.”
His smile fades. “That sounds pretty serious.”
“It is. Very serious.”
“In that case, I think I prefer to stand.” A flicker of uncertainty in his green eyes. “Just how much of you is Jess right now?”
“I am myself.”
“Really? Cause you’re sounding pretty strange.”
“Essentially, I am myself.”
“If you say so.” He does not look convinced.
I walk up to him, take both his hands in mine. “Jonathan. There is something you need to know. This knowledge may bring you pain, for which I apologize. But eventually it will be the years of not knowing rather than the knowledge itself that will cause you distress.”
The uncertainty in his eyes turns to wariness. “I don’t know if I want to hear this.”
“Unfortunately, I am honor-bound to tell you. Are you sure you don’t want to sit down?”
“Jesus, Jess. You’re scaring me.”
I inhale deeply, bracing myself. Then I wait until he gives me a barely perceptible nod before I speak. “Your mother and your sister never left you, Jonathan. They are still here, fully alive in this world, even if they cannot communicate with you any longer. Your grandmother too. And her sister and your aunts.”
I watch his pupils dilate with shock. “No.”
“They have been here all the time, watching over you.”
“No.”
“Your mother wants you to know that she has not missed a moment of your life. Your talks to her every night are by far the most precious part of her life.”
“No.”
“She wants you to know that she has heard every word you ever said to her. And she is incredibly proud of who you have become.”
“You’re lying.” His face now as white as a sheet.
“She wanted me to tell you that you are a good man. Better than you know, and far better than your father ever was. And she wants you to know that you are right.”
“No.” He yanks his hands from mine. “It’s only their bodies that are here. They chose another dimension—”
“No, they didn’t. They never left you.”
“You’re lying!”
“Your sister also wants you to know that you are right. You were right all along! And all of them—your mother, your grandmother, your sister, your aunts—want to send you the same message.”
“No.”
“Follow your heart, Jonathan. You were right all along. Forget all the lies you were told and follow your heart.”
“Why are you doing this?” He grabs me by the shoulders, his hands like a vice. “Why would you say this?”
“Because they asked me to.”
He gives me a little shake. “You’re lying! Admit it!”
When I don’t say anything he shoves me away so violently that I fall back against the wall, knocking my head, hard.
“Your mother knew you would fight this knowledge,” I say calmly while I rub the back of my head. “She said to tell you that, deep inside, you already know the truth. You always did. You are only fighting it now because you were taught to mistrust your inner wisdom.”
His eyes start to glisten with unshed tears. “Liar!”
“Y
our sister thought you might need more proof. So she asked me to tell you that the little blue man dancing around the green moon has still not found his cat.”
He recoils from my words, then yanks me to my feet in a kind of despairing fury. “How did you find out? What did you do? How can you know this?”
“I know only what they told me. Tonight. They came to me in their spiritforms while I was swimming in the lake, and they asked me to tell you this.”
He grabs me by the throat and pushes me against the wall. “Liar!”
I hold myself completely still.
I have lost a mother too, and I know what it means to find out that you have been deceived your whole life. More than that, I deeply understand how easy it is to hide behind anger when the alternative is facing up to the kind of hurt that can destroy you.
And so I don’t fight him, at first. Out of pity, I allow him to take his anger out on me for a little while.
It is only when he lifts me off my feet with one hand, squeezing my throat so I cannot breathe or speak, that I remember the basic skill of bloodmagic is Physicality, and that Jonathan is far stronger than any normal man could ever be.
“Liar! Liar! Liar!”
My world narrows to a small circle: the hand around my throat, the wall against my back, the clawing lack of air—
And then Gunn storms through the door with Zig right behind him, and the room explodes with screams and blows and punches and, frankly, far too much testosterone for this time of the morning.
It’s about an hour later.
Ingrid is angry at me. Gunn is disappointed. By now I’m so used to them feeling this way about me that it doesn’t upset me the way it used to.
Ingrid tells me it was wildly irresponsible for me to have dived into that lake. All that water could have sparked my inherent seamagic she says, her hands fluttering all over the place in agitation. What if I’d been pushed so far onto the path of the ocean that I couldn’t turn back? We can’t afford for me to enter a state of flux again; I need my firemagic to survive! The White Lady and her Skykeepers are determined to kill me, and my firemagic is the best weapon we have! What could I have been thinking? When will I realize the danger I’m in?
Ingrid is dressed in a silver pantsuit with a bright metallic sheen. While she rages, pacing up and down, I stare at her outfit, fascinated by the way the light reflects on the shiny material. Circles of light and depths of shade. Bright patches, and then blackness.
A memory of weapons, of armor glinting in the dark.
“Jess, are you listening to me?”
It takes some effort to pull me back. To anchor my thoughts in the here and now. “Yes. Sorry. Go on.”
Gunn is far less upset about me swimming in the lake than about me allowing Jonathan into my room. Don’t I understand that Jonathan Pendragon is my enemy? Do I still not understand the history of this family? Can’t I see what they have planned for me? How can I not grasp the danger I’m in?
Gunn’s voice is gentle, but I know he must be really stressed because of the way a certain tiny muscle in his jaw keeps jumping up and down. I can also see he’s trying to be as diplomatic as possible, because he often stops himself midway through a sentence to run his hand through his hair, sighing, before he continues.
I pretend to look suitably chastened while he lectures me, but to be honest, perhaps I don’t try too hard. For years and years I did whatever Gunn wanted. If he’d asked me to, I would have jumped off a cliff like a freaking lemming, I trusted him so much. I shared my deepest feelings and my greatest insecurities with him, and I ran to him with all my problems because I knew he cared for me, even if he didn’t love me in the way I wanted him to.
Hah. Cared. What a word.
Of course he cared for me. A zookeeper cares for zoo animals, a beekeeper cares for bees, and a Dragonkeeper… Well. He certainly made a damn good job of it.
He stops his lecture mid-sentence. “Jess. Are you okay?”
Those painfully gorgeous dark blue eyes. That perfectly carved, expressive mouth.
“Yes. I’m fine. I’m sorry.”
“You don’t have to apologize all the time.”
“Do I do that? I’m sorry, I didn’t realize.”
He sighs, glancing at Ingrid, but I’m too distracted by the task still waiting for me to let their secret little looks get to me.
“Is Daniel still shine-struck?” I ask.
“I’m not sure,” Gunn says. “You should ask your Skykeepers. Where are they anyway?”
I ignore his question. “Where’s Sofia? I need to speak to her.”
“At this time of the morning, she’s usually in the downstairs library.”
“Okay.” I get up, walk to the door.
“This conversation isn’t finished, young lady,” Ingrid says.
I lift my hands in a helpless gesture. “I’m sorry, okay? I didn’t mean to do anything wrong and I’m not trying to be difficult. I promise. It might not look like it, but I’m doing the best I can.” Then I walk out the door, and straight into Zig’s glowering face.
“Where do you think you’re going?”
“I need to speak to Sofia.”
He scowls as he looks at my neck, which is badly bruised from Jonathan’s attack. “You should Heal that,” he says brusquely.
I lift my hand to my throat. “I don’t know how. I’ve never Healed anything before, and these bruises aren’t reacting to my shine.”
“It’s because it was made by a Pendragon. Their bloodmagic—” He stops himself midsentence, as usual stubbornly unwilling to say a civil word to me. In the end he merely gives a tense little nod. “It will get better in time.”
I stare at my feet, patiently waiting for him to let me pass, but for some reason he keeps blocking the way. “What?” I ask when I finally look up to find him scowling at me. “What did I do now?”
His icy glare reminds me of what Jonathan told me this morning.
Oh crap.
“So, um, I’m sorry about the whole refusing to get dressed thing. To be honest, I can’t even remember it, but Jonathan told me what happened and I mean, obviously that was completely inappropriate…” I rub my forehead, trying to hide my blushing face. “Anyway, I’ll make sure your shirt is cleaned and—”
“I don’t care about the shirt.”
Because I can’t quite bring myself to look into his eyes, I focus on the dragon tattoo on his face instead. “I really need to speak to Sofia.”
“So speak to her.”
“You’re kind of blocking the way.”
He frowns down at the space between us, as if he doesn’t understand why he’s standing here either. Then he clears his throat. “I never thought Jonathan would attack you. If I’d known he was so unstable, I wouldn’t have left him alone with you.” His voice is so harsh and his expression so hostile that it takes me a moment to make sense of his words.
“Are you apologizing?”
“No.” The faintest pause. “Of course not.”
“Then what?” I ask, trying to understand what’s happening here. “Is this some kind of… bodyguard pride thing?”
“What are you talking about?”
“I’m talking about the fact that, for someone who has sworn to kill me, you seem very concerned with keeping me alive lately. I’m starting to find it a bit confusing.”
“Your confusion is not my problem,” he grates, his face now filled with the old hatred again.
“And there’s the Zig we all know and love,” I say drily as I step around his hard, unmoving body to go look for Sofia.
I find her in the downstairs library, studying an old book.
When she sees me she carefully closes the book. “Jess. I hear you finally found the lake.”
“News travels fast.”
“Your shine woke us all. I had to lock our bedroom door and hide the key to prevent Noah from getting into trouble.”
“I’m sorry.”
She gives me a level look. “Your ma
gic is spiraling out of control.”
“I know. You should get your husband and your son out of here immediately.”
“The Orlovs want us dead and they have spies everywhere. It’s too risky.”
“It’s riskier to stay.”
She narrows her eyes. “Once we leave we won’t come back.”
“I know. Daniel can’t see me again until his magic has been sparked. I understand that.”
“I don’t think you do. He can’t pledge himself to Sonya and no other clan will take him. He’s fully White—there will be no point.” She puts her hand on mine for a brief moment. Not so much a caress as a warning. “So you need to know that this is it. Once we leave, you won’t ever see him again.”
“No. That’s what I came to tell you. There’s a way for him to claim his magic and he should do it right away.”
“I just told you. White will never accept him.”
“Sonya Orlov isn’t the Skykeepers’ only leader.”
She pauses for a beat. “The White Lord?”
“Yes.”
“Oh, Jess. He’s no use to us.”
“The White Lord can spark Daniel’s magic just as easily as the White Lady.”
“Maybe, but he’s turned his back on this world and the everyday matters of the White clan years ago.”
“He defied the White Lady when she broke with the Order. And almost half the Skykeepers chose to follow him instead of her, which means he must still have a lot of power.”
“Yes, he has power. If he didn’t, Sonya would’ve gotten rid of him long ago. But he’s a mystery wrapped up in an enigma. Nobody knows why he didn’t support her rebellion, and it’s certainly no guarantee that he’ll be willing to help us.”
“He’ll help us.”
She waves my words away. “I don’t know where you got that idea but I assure you, it’s hopeless. Nobody even knows where he is; the man’s a hermit—”
“I know where he is.”
She sits up straighter. “You do?”
“The half-dragons told me.”
“You can communicate with them?”
“Yes.”
“Really? That’s fascinating. Did it happen here? Last night in the lake?”
Treasurekeeper Page 5
