by M. E. James
She waved away his comment. "Stop trying to make me feel better."
"I'm not." He ground his teeth. "I'm telling the truth. That night, I wanted you bad, so bad I would have kept going."
Though she wasn't sure that she believed him, she didn't refute his claims any longer. "Are you…are you sure that you want to help me with this?"
"Of course I do." His gray eyes softened. "How long have you known you were pregnant, anyway?"
She sunk her teeth into her bottom lip. "Not long. I figured it out only yesterday."
And she was still scared. No, scared was too weak a word to describe what she was feeling. She was terrified. Though she'd told the father she was pregnant, she had so many more trials to overcome. Quivering, she reached out and grabbed the wall for support. Unfortunately, Sebastian saw.
He was at her side within moments, steadying her. A zing of electricity rushed through her body, reminding her just how this situation had come about in the first place. She met his eyes, certain that she was going to fall into them. For a moment he stared back at her, saying nothing, but then he gave her side a gentle squeeze and helped her over to the couch. She sunk down, not sure whether she was relieved or surprised.
Sebastian touched her arm. "You're shaking all over."
"If you happened to notice, I wasn't exactly jumping for joy when I told you the news." She chewed her bottom lip. "I spent all night wondering how you were going to react."
"I suppose you don't know me that well, do you?" he said quietly.
"We've only spent one day together."
"That'll change now." Sebastian's grip on her wrist tightened. "I'm going to take responsibility for everything, and I promise I'll take care of you."
You really are Mr. Hero, aren't you?
"Aren't you scared?" She studied him.
His eyes darkened. "Of having a baby?"
"Yeah." She hung her head.
"I guess so." The man hesitated, his jaw clenching. "I don't think the news has sunk in yet."
"I'm not used to this yet either." She stared down at herself. "Everything is different, but it's exactly the same too. I find it so hard to fathom that I'm having a baby."
He made an effort to appear comforting, but it looked more like a cringe. "We'll find a way to make this work. I promise."
Suddenly, she couldn't think of what to say.
"I'm sorry about how I acted when you came inside," Sebastian said, saving her from the awkward silence. "You were horrified enough. It was just that I really have been looking for you everywhere."
"It's okay. I understand." She winced. "To be honest, running out on you the morning after our night together wasn't exactly an intelligent move on my part. I just hated the idea of being the woman you slept with who you couldn't get rid of."
Sebastian squeezed her wrist. "You came back, though, right? That's all that matters."
She winced. "I'm sure that this wasn't the reunion you had in mind."
"Maybe not, but it's better than nothing." Sebastian took a deep breath. "And if this was going to happen with anyone, well, I'm glad it was with you."
The words stole her breath, and she wasn't sure it would come back. "You don't even know me that well."
"I know enough." A vein throbbed in Sebastian's jaw. "You're smart, funny, and attractive. Any man would be lucky to have a woman like you."
She gave a derisive snort.
"It's the truth," he said.
"Okay." She didn't believe his compliments for a second, but she continued on regardless. "I'm also rude, cynical, and stubborn."
"I'm stubborn too."
She cringed. "I've begun to realize that."
"You'll realize more than that soon enough."
"I probably will," she said.
For a moment neither of them said anything. She was too busy being stunned, and Sebastian was too busy being, well, she didn't know. He looked awfully serious, and she had the feeling that he wasn't daydreaming about puppies frolicking in a meadow of daisies.
"I want you to marry me," he said suddenly.
She wasn't sure what she expected, but it wasn't that. "Excuse me? Was that a proposal?"
"Yes." The man sighed. "You're going to have my baby. Marrying you is the least I can do."
"You make me sound like a charity case." She wrinkled her nose.
"You know I don't mean it that way," he said. "Look, this situation surprised me. You can't expect me to get down on one knee and give you a big, fancy speech. I know this isn't the kind of proposal that a woman dreams of—"
"No, I'm sure that this is the proposal every woman wants," she said drily.
"But at least it's better than none at all."
She didn't like the way Sebastian made it sound like he was being forced to marry her. She knew that she was pregnant with his child, but she hadn't even thought about getting engaged. Maybe she wanted him to take responsibility and be a part of the child's life, but marrying him would be like marrying a stranger. She'd probably have to move, clean his house, cook his meals, and share his bed…No, wait, sharing his bed didn't sound all that bad. She could imagine their legs intertwining as his fingers buried in her hair. Already she could taste his mouth on hers, urging her on as she longed for more. Maybe he'd run his fingers up her inner thighs and then she'd—
Crap, she was turning into a raging pervert. Why was she thinking like this? She was in the room with Sebastian for a half an hour and all of the suddenly she was imagining him fondling her girly bits. Well, no siree, she was going to rid those thoughts from her mind.
"Emmy?" Sebastian touched her wrist. "You haven't answered me yet. Will you marry me?"
She snapped to attention. "I, I don't know."
"You don't know?" He looked so incredulous she wanted to poke him in the eye.
"Well, forgive me," she grumbled. "It's not like I came over here thinking, 'He's going to ask me to marry him, and we'll be together forever and ever and ever.' Marrying you will change everything."
"And having a baby won't?"
"Of course it will." She wrinkled her nose. "But that doesn't mean I'm going to marry you at the drop of the hat. You know I could do all of this without you."
He clapped his hand to his chest. "Ouch."
"I didn't mean to be insulting." She sighed, wishing she'd be a little more careful about what came out of her mouth. "It's just that I don't need a man to take care of me or this baby. You know that, right?"
"Of course I know that," he said. "It's one of the reasons why I like you."
"And if I were to marry you, I wouldn't be one of those women who cooks, cleans, and does all of the housework." She gave him a stern look. "We'd have an equal division of labor."
"I never expected you to be my housemaid, Emmy." He looked pointedly around the room. "Does it look like I need anybody else to clean this place for me?"
"Hmmm." Well, he had a point there. He was cleaner than she was. "And I don't intend to stop working either. I'll run my bakery until the day I die."
Sebastian's eyes widened. "Cripes, did I ever tell you not to work? You can do whatever you want."
"This is what I mean," she said. "I don't know what to expect from you. You could be a man who stows dead women in his closet."
Without saying a word, Sebastian stood up and headed toward a door to the right of the TV. He opened it, revealing a closet filled with cleaning supplies.
"No bodies," he said.
She rolled her eyes. "You know I didn't mean that literally."
"I'm not a rapist or drug dealer either," he said.
Now he was just being ridiculous
"Good to know." She had to stifle a groan. "Now what's your blood type? Do you have any diseases in your family?"
"Do I have to answer all of that before you'll agree to marry me?" He shook his head in exasperation.
"Your family's health is that bad, huh?"
Wincing at her insinuation, he walked back over to the couch. "I'm blood
type AB. My family also has excellent health. Happy now?"
She had a whole new list of questions for him. "Well…"
"Oh no." The man groaned and sunk down onto the couch next to her. "Look, Emmy…"
"Uh-huh?"
Sebastian seized her hands. "I'm a good guy, and I like you. Maybe we don't know each other that well yet, but I think that it'll be better for you in the long run if we get married. Still, if you need more time to think about it, then I can wait."
"Thank you." Her shoulders slumped in relief. She still wasn't sure what answer to give him.
"But until then, I think we need to make an effort to get to know each other." His grip on her hands tightened. "That way, when you decide to say yes—"
"If," she interrupted.
"If," he agreed. "Well, if you decide to say yes, then you'll know what you're getting yourself into."
She contemplated his words for a moment. The man was the father of her child, and she supposed that she should make an effort to get closer to him. Plus, it wasn't like he would be a hard person to spend time with. He wasn't a creeper who collected women's hair or ate fly larva for dinner. This was Sebastian. Gorgeous, friendly, heroic Sebastian. How bad could it be?
"I guess I can agree with those terms." She sighed.
His eyes were sparkling with mischievousness. "And until then, I'll do everything in my power to make you say yes."
"Why do you want to marry me so bad, anyway?" She studied him, half wishing she could crawl inside of his skull to see the inner workings of his brain.
"Why? That should be obvious," he said. "Because you're the mother of my child, and I want to have you close so I don't miss a single moment of this experience."
"Jeez, you just found out I was pregnant and you're already to take responsibility for everything," she said. "When I found out I was pregnant, I started puking. Though that could have been because I'd just eaten a plate of creampuffs."
He paused because of her words, then threw back his head and laughed. "See, this is why I like you. You not only admit that you eat, but you also admit to puking too."
"Women don't eat or puke?" she asked.
"Oh, they do." He shrugged. "But most of them don't tell me about it."
She winced. "Sorry."
"Don't be sorry." He ruffled her hair. "I like your honesty. And now, I'd like for you to answer a question I've had for a long, long time."
The words made her go rigid. "What is it?"
Judging by the expression on his face, his question was important. Unfortunately, she had no idea what kind of pressing query he had in store for her.
"What the hell is your last name?"
She let out a laugh. "Oh. That. It's Ellison."
"Emmy Ellison." The man finally smiled. "If only I had known that the whole time."
"I don't know your last name either," she pointed out.
"It's Black," he said.
"Well, Sebastian Black, nice to meet you." She stuck out her hand.
The man took her hand and shook it. "Nice to meet you too. Now let's have a baby together."
****
An hour later, Emmy walked side by side with Sebastian as they headed to a steak restaurant. She glanced at the man beside her, noticing the way his hair curled over his gorgeous forehead. She took a moment to picture what their baby might look like. It was easy to imagine pale, tiny fingers curling around her hand. As she experienced the first bought of excitement since she became pregnant, she smiled.
Sebastian studied her expression. "Finally, you're smiling."
"You sound relieved."
"Back in the apartment, you spent half our conversation looking as though you were about to cry," he said.
"Well, you know learning that you're pregnant isn't exactly stress-free," she said.
"I know exactly what you mean," he said drily.
Both of them fell silent. The quiet between them was strange after the conversation filled night back at his apartment. She searched her mind, trying to think of something to say. Instead of coming up with anything witty, all she could think was, blah, blah, blah. She didn't normally have to play hide-and-seek with the words in her head. Her lack of speaking ability was horrifying.
"How about we play a game," Sebastian said, rescuing her from remaining forever mute.
She wasn't much in the mood for games. "What?"
"I ask a question and you answer me yes or no," he said. "How does that sound?"
"Sounds silly."
"It's a good way to get to know each other." The man elbowed her, grinning.
Somehow his grin was infectious. She found herself smiling too in spite of herself.
"Oh, all right." She rolled her eyes. "Are you asking the questions or am I?"
He shrugged. "I'll start, since I have some things I want to ask."
"I'm sensing an ulterior motive here…" she muttered under her breath.
"Doesn't almost everyone have an ulterior motive?" He studied her expectantly.
A can was lying on the side of the road. She kicked it. "Feeling philosophical tonight, are we?"
"I'm always philosophical."
She groaned. "Fine. I guess you're right. Almost everyone has an ulterior motive."
He smirked. "I'm always right too."
"Ha-ha." Rolling her eyes, she elbowed him in the ribs.
Finally, the pregnancy-induced awkwardness faded. She thought that should have been added to the list of side effects of being pregnant: nausea, vomiting, swelling, sore nipples, awkwardness around the father of baby.
"Okay, now here's my first question," he said. "Do you like children?"
"Yes."
"Are you at least a little excited about the baby?"
She considered it. "Yes."
"Do you like sports?" he asked.
"Some." Wait, it had to be yes or no. "No, I guess not."
"Disappointing." He grinned, but moved on. "How about video games? Do you like them?"
"No."
"Sitcoms?" he asked.
"Yes."
"Do you want more than one child?"
She imagined holding the hand of a little boy and girl. It was a dream she'd never even thought about until that moment. "Surprisingly, yes."
"Is dessert better than the meal?"
"Yes." She was a chocoholic.
The questions continued for some time until she was practically dizzy.
Finally, he said, "Do you regret sleeping with me that night?"
Before she even thought about it, her answer slipped out. "No."
She stopped walking, stunned by her own reply. Even after getting pregnant, she didn't regret sleeping with Sebastian. She didn't believe it, and yet she did at the same time.
"I'm glad." He took her hand and steered her to face him. "I don't regret what happened between us either."
When she looked up at him, she blinked in shock. "But I'm pregnant because of that night."
"Yeah, I think that's something engrained in both of our minds by now." The man was grinning, despite everything.
As she stared into his face, Sebastian placed his hands on her shoulders. His gaze dropped to her lips. At that moment, she realized he was going to kiss her. She was alarmed and a little pleased. The truth of the matter was that she'd been thinking about his mouth a lot since they'd slept together—sucking on them, licking them, feeling them roving against hers. The man bent his head, and she felt his hot breath against her cheek. When his lips swooped down to capture hers, she squeezed her eyes shut as her breath left her body in a quick gasp. His fingers tangled in her hair, and he drew her closer against him, grinding his hips against hers. She could feel his hard shaft burrowing in her soft lower stomach and she shivered. His fingers burrowed in her hair, and a moment later, he pulled back, leaving her lips hot and tingly.
She swayed against him, her brain a puddle of mush. "Wow."
"There's a lot more where that came from, sweetheart," Sebastian whispered in her ear.<
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His lips captured hers again. Her knees turned to water in his embrace, and if he had not been holding onto her, she was certain that she would have fallen over. Just as his lips left hers and his mouth strayed down to her neck where a vein throbbed desperately, she saw something dark out of the corner of her eye.
"Wait," she said as she spotted a man in the distance.
He kissed her neck. "I don't want to wait. I've been dreaming about kissing you for a month."
Unfortunately, she could no longer focus on his lips running sensuously over her skin. Her attention was on the tall man standing between two trees. The man's hair was brown but threaded with gray. He looked to be in his midfifties, yet he was so attractive that she was certain young women fell at his feet. Yet when she met his chocolate-colored eyes, all she experienced was a rush of fear that made her whole body stiffen. She didn't know that person, and yet all she wanted to do was run and hide.
"Okay, this isn't the reaction I was hoping to get from you." Sebastian stepped away from her, yet his hands still lingered on her waist.
She bit her bottom lip. "There was a man watching us."
"Good to know it wasn't my subpar kissing skills that led to the lack of interest," he muttered.
"Sebastian!" She wrinkled her nose.
Finally, Sebastian took her seriously and turned in the direction she was looking. There was only one problem.
"He's gone," she whispered.
"Are you sure there was somebody there?"
"Dead sure." She chewed her bottom lip.
Sebastian glanced at her warily.
"Let's just go." She seized his arm when he didn't say anything. "I'm hungry. It's been a hell of a day, and if I don't eat an entire plate of fries, I'm going to go insane."
He allowed her to drag him, but he kept looking over his shoulder.
"I shouldn't have said anything." She shook her head. "It was nothing."
"If you say so," he said.
"You were making a scene." She sighed in exasperation. "It's not that surprising that a guy was looking at us."
"I was making a scene?" His grin finally reappeared. "I believe it takes two people to kiss, sweetheart."
Her cheek colored. "Well, I was just trying not to hurt your feelings."
