by Jean Haus
***
“Ah, ha!” I say, snapping the back of the book closed. “I’m right. You’re wrong.” I flick Romeo’s paper with a finger and it falls off the counter.
He quickly shuffles to the answers in the back of the book. “Damn. That’s a first.” He snatches my paper and picks his up from the floor.
While he compares the two, I go to the fridge and fill two glasses with ice and water. Setting them down in front of our mess on the counter, I smirk at his wrinkled brow. “Figure out where you screwed up yet?”
“Yeah, I forgot to take the derivative the third time.”
I feign a look of surprise and come around the kitchen island. “Genius boy forgot?”
He swivels around on the stool and pulls me between his legs by the belt loops of my jeans. “Did you just call me a boy?”
A grin explodes across my mouth. “I believe I did.”
He removes the grin off my lips with a hard, deep kiss. “Did that feel like a boy?”
I brace my hands on his thighs. “That felt very manly. And pretty damn hot,” I add, inching closer to him.
He groans and drops his forehead to mine. “What am I going to do with you?”
“Should I answer that?”
He shakes his head. “Not when we’re in a house alone.”
I drown in the lustful thoughts that flip-flop between our gazes, but my mother and sister could come home at any second. “Should I call you Justin now? When were alone at least?”
“Ah no. After living with Justin for over two years, I like Romeo better.” His hands tighten at my waist. “We should tell the guys. Hiding like this…I feel disrespectful to you and to them.”
The mood suddenly changes with those words. I step back and sit on the stool while he watches me. “Today sucked, but usually the only time I’m around is at practice.” I slide my textbook closer to the edge of the counter. “I think you were right last night. Let’s wait it out and see how things go. There’s no reason to get everyone riled up before anything’s… real.”
His dark eyes pin me to my stool. “This feels real.”
Under the intensity of his stare, I’m wondering how to respond to that when the door to the garage opens. “Romeo’s here,” Jamie squeals.
I introduce him to my mother while Jamie bounces around him. While she is polite, my mother seems disinterested which is totally different from the way she acted when I brought Aaron home for the first time. She hovered and questioned with Aaron. She’s almost dismissive with Romeo. I’m not sure if her indifference is because I’m technically an adult or if she can’t care about anything outside of her bubble of depression, but her reaction bothers me.
Jamie brings her DS to the kitchen. My mother, seeing we’re studying, takes her upstairs for a movie. Thankfully the seriousness that hovered between Romeo and I is absent as we finish going over the sections for tomorrow’s quiz.
Near ten o’clock, I walk him to his van parked in the street. After he tosses his books inside, he reaches for my wrist, but I step back. “I wouldn’t do that here.”
He cocks his head in question and that angled fringe of hair falls over his eye.
“Marcus lives across the street two houses down. And though he’s at the dorm, his family might see and say something.”
He lifts his chin as his jaw tightens. “So we’re going with the dirty little secret thing?”
“Though I don’t like this pretending crap, I’m just not ready to deal with Justin and Sam yet.”
His expression is conflicted, but he says, “Alright, I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I go to the sidewalk and wave to him as he drives away. I actually don’t want to deal with Sam or Justin, but the truth is I’m not ready to make Romeo and me official yet.
Chapter 23
I finish the last problem on the Calculus quiz with confidence. Professor Hill likes to save the fun for the end of the class. However, as I pack up my bag and slip on a jacket, my nervousness about my grade sets in. The professor will hand back last week’s test when I hand in the quiz. Tests are worth fifty percent of our grade. If I didn’t do well, my college career will start out in a slump. Taking a deep breath of courage in, I march past the last two people still quizzing and plop my quiz on the pile with the others.
Professor Hill looks at me through thick glasses. “Riley Middleton, right?” he asks lowly. After my nod, he shuffles through the papers and hands me the test.
“Thanks,” I mutter, turning away and lifting the stapled mass of paper up. The score on the top has me rushing into the hall to find Romeo.
He waits near the door to the outside entrance. Unsurprisingly, two girls are talking to him. As I get closer, I am surprised when one of them turns her head in a giggle. Kendra obviously is still hoping for a fuck fest. Ah yeah, over my dead body.
I shake my head at Romeo as he tries to break away from his stalkers.
He seems to get my point because he stays put. Yet when I pass, he yells out, “Hey Riley, you said you’d give me a ride to…the mall.”
To the mall? That was lame. I stop and force a confused look. “Oh yeah, I almost forgot.” That was even lamer. In fact, this whole secret thing is lame every time it comes up.
Kendra turns toward me. “Hey Riley.” Her wide eyes make a gesturing roll at Romeo. “We should meet you at the mall.”
My hand tightens on the strap of my bag. “Ah…”
Romeo steps between the two girls. “We should, but we’ll have to do it another time. We have a… quick band errand to run.”
Kendra visibly deflates. Her tall, pretty friend, who I‘ve never met, stares at Romeo as he sides up to me.
We step away and Kendra yells, “Call me later, Riley.”
I quickly slip out the doors to cut off a possible answer.
A few steps into the brisk wind of the day, I glance at Romeo as we walk along the sidewalk that leads to the parking lot. “She asked you about a girlfriend didn’t she? And you told her you didn’t have one.”
His head snaps up. “I thought we were hush, hush.”
“She was asking about April.” That he thinks I’m referring to me is a bit scary.
“You told her I was dating April?” he asks as his winged brows meet.
“I thought you were when she didn’t understand your flirting then quick departure.”
He nods slowly. “Guess I do need to tone it down.”
I give him a look. There is no way in hell I’m going to watch girls hang all over him now.
“Like to an almost non-existent level.”
“Ah, I knew you were smart.” Stopping at the curb, I lift my test up. “Look at this.”
“A ninety,” he says with a lopsided grin that threatens to steal my breath. “I think I deserve a kiss for that.”
I grin back. “I think you do too. But not here.”
His eyes roams over me slowly. Slow enough that I can feel the heat of his gaze in the brisk wind. “We should celebrate.”
“Thought you had work.”
“I have two training sessions tonight but not until seven.”
The temptation wanes as I think of the time. “I have to pick up my sister.” My mother usually picks Jamie up on Monday’s since it’s her other day off, but today she has a counseling appointment at the Child and Family Center. I had to nag and beg, but she finally made the appointment.
“We could pick her up and take her with us. You’d just have to bring me back by six thirty.”
Temptation becomes sweet reality. “Okay, but we’re not going to the mall.”
“How about pizza at your house?”
I grin at him. “Pizza and my house would be perfect.”
On the way to pick up my sister, about two miles from the university, Romeo reaches across me at a four way stop and puts the car into park. Confused, I turn to him.
He grins. “Time for my tutoring reward.”
I’m grinning too. At least for a quick second.
&n
bsp; He wraps a hand around the back of my neck. Strong fingers press me closer. His lips first suck on mine then he sweeps his tongue in for a thorough kiss.
A horn sounds behind us but his kiss has me prisoner.
He lets me go.
The horn blares again.
My eyes flutter open and stare into those nearly ebony eyes. “That was nice.” I touch my lips. “As in sizzling.”
He sits back, a smug expression on his face. “Maybe you should drive.”
I shift the car out of park.
The person behind us holds the horn down.
“Yeah, yeah, I’m driving,” I say and wave behind me.
On the rest of the way to my sister’s school, he looks through my iPod and randomly makes comments about drummers and their limited song choices. All loud banging and fast beats. And here I thought my music selection was eclectic.
We wait for Jamie until the long line in front of the sprawling elementary school is reduced to a handful of cars. Since she usually comes out with the first wave of students, her absence has me worried.
Romeo waits in the driver’s side while I go into the school. The halls are nearly empty and she’s not at her locker. Her classroom’s empty of students too but when her teacher sees me she smiles. “I figured you’d show up, Riley.” Every time I come to school I like Mrs. Hess more. She wowed me with her politeness at the open house—my mother couldn’t attend—but right now she’s confusing me.
She reaches for a stack of papers and books on her desk. “Here’s the work. Depending on how she’s feeling, she may not be able to get all of it done. Math and reading are the most important.”
I meet her half-way across the room and take the pile. “Jamie didn’t come to school today?”
She shakes her head. “Your mother must have called. The computer had her marked as an illness.”
“Oh,” I simply say because Jamie was watching TV and bouncing around the living room when I left this morning. I tighten my grip on the stack of books. “Okay, I’ll make sure she gets most of it done.”
In the hallway, I’m on the phone with my mother in seconds. Her sigh is loud and irritating, as I demand to know why Jamie didn’t go to school.
“I overslept, alright.”
“Why didn’t you bring her in late at least?” I ask, exiting the building.
“I only get one day off with her, Riley.”
There’s a long pause between us. I never missed school unless I was extremely sick—like deathbed sick. My mother drilled the importance of attendance into me for thirteen years—six of which I received an award for perfect attendance. But my mother’s newfound irresponsibility isn’t the biggest issue. “So you missed your counseling appointment.”
She sighs again. “I can reschedule.”
I wander to the lawn on the edge of the sidewalk and kick leaves. “So you haven’t yet. What exactly did you do all day?”
“I think you’re forgetting who the parent is.”
“Well it’s kind of easy when you don’t act like one,” I snap.
She hangs up on me.
I get in the passenger seat, toss Jamie’s books, and my phone in the backseat.
One look at my furious expression has Romeo saying, “I’m guessing the celebration has been canceled.”
I yank at the seatbelt.
His fingers turn the ignition. “And I’m guessing I’ll be driving back to the dorms.”
The seat belt buckle snaps loudly into place. “I don’t know who my mother is anymore.”
He glances at me with a sad look but stays silent and drives.
I sink down in my seat and push my tennis shoes against the glove box. “I used to wake up to bacon and pancakes. Now she doesn’t get up. Holiday’s used to inspire a decorating frenzy. For Halloween, she put one plastic pumpkin on the coffee table this year. Until I was in high school, she went over my homework with a fine toothed comb. Now she’s letting Jamie stay home on a whim.”
Romeo keeps his gaze on the road but his mouth turns down. “Things like divorce or the death of a loved one are stressful and can change people, Riley. Is your mom going to counseling yet?”
My fingers rub my temples as I shake my head. “She was supposed to go today, but the not big effing surprise is that she didn’t. I knew she’d find a way to weasel out of it.”
“Sounds like she’s afraid to go.”
“No shit.”
“You need to be patient with her.”
“I am but for how long? How long does Jamie have to live with half or less of a mother?”
He gives me a pained glance before turning onto the highway.
“And I’m not her. I’m not Jamie’s mother. I try to do what I can for both of them. But it’s obviously not working! Everything is just getting worse!”
Suddenly, Romeo pulls off to the side of the road. He reaches for me and I fall into the warmth of his body with a shudder. Even with the console between us and the sound of cars whizzing by, I’m encased in tranquility. I breathe in his clean scent, press my face farther into his chest, and tighten my hold on his back. The world stops spinning as I let his embrace strengthen me. The highway disappears and there’s nothing but Romeo and me.
Sometime later, the earth rotates again when Romeo pulls a few inches away and tilts my chin up with a finger. “Better?”
I nod and fall back against the seat. He finds a song with a somewhat slower drum beat before merging back on the highway. My fingers play the song on the dashboard as he drives to the dorm. He rolls his eyes at my playing, but it calms me.
Romeo doesn’t turn off the car when we pull in front of us building. He watches a few students coming and going before turning. “Will you call me if you need to talk?”
I nod slowly.
With his grip on the door handle, he asks, “You’re coming to practice tomorrow?”
I reach for the passenger handle. “Of course, playing keep me sane.”
He smiles weakly and shakes his head. “And people say I’m obsessed. Can we do something after?”
At the thought of being alone with him, I can’t help a wide smile. “Yes. I’d like that.”
Chapter 24
Over the past week and a half, Romeo and I have seen two late night movies and gone to a twenty-four hour diner for coffee three times. After each outing—two after band practice—we fog up the windows of my car or his van. Then there are the late night calls. Sometimes they’re deep and thoughtful and revealing. I could listen to Romeo talk about his musical, boxing grandfather for hours. The only person he respects more is his hard working, single mother. He understands my conflicted feelings about my father—the man he is compared to the man he was. Other times we stray into insignificant and silly. I text him pictures of my drum stick collection. He raps old Celtic songs to me over the phone. We argue over music. He likes the new wave of folksy stuff like Mumford and Sons and The Black Keys. I’m into classics like the Beastie Boys and Nirvana. Strangely, our taste in music rarely connects. Yet when we’re together, we exist on an island for two where sincerity and benevolence are intertwined in the warm breeze. And while I try to tell myself our secrecy is keeping things slow, my heart feels like it’s falling way too fast.
Especially when he touches me.
And as usual, he’s trying to touch me as we walk through the theater parking lot.
He reaches for my hand. I smack his shoulder. “Stop it before someone sees,” I hiss then add, “You already held it for the entire movie.” And did sexy things with his fingers the whole time. Who knew the brush of a thumb on a wrist could be hot? I never imagined such a thing before. Now I’ll be imagining it all the time.
He shrugs. “We’re already here together. So what if someone sees us?”
“Well hand holding is not as easy to explain as two friends going to a movie.”
He gives me a level look but doesn’t reply until we get to the end row near his van. Then his reply comes in the form of pressing me
against the cold side of his vehicle and kissing me hard and long until I’m gasping for breath. He steps back, panting into the cool night air. “Did that feel like a friend?”
Under the dim parking lights, the hard lines of his face twisted in anger make him look sexier than usual. And his usual is pretty damn sexy. I yank a lapel of his black wool coat and he’s close again. “That felt like the guy I can’t stop imagining about.”
His dark eyes flare. “Tuesday, you should come to the dorm after practice.”
“What about Justin?”
He shrugs. “He always stays until the bar closes.”
I give him a skeptical look.
He places a hand on the side of the van next to my head and leans near my ear. “I’ll play the fiddle for you.”
Now that is more temptation than I can handle. “Alright, you win,” I say, thinking I’ll have to park a couple doors down because of Marcus.
His lips brush the skin of my neck. “Early night right?”
I nod as a shiver runs through me. I’m not sure getting home after midnight constitutes an early night. “Eight o’clock class tomorrow morning.”
He straightens his arm and looks down at me. “I’m booked tomorrow so except for Calculus…” He sighs. “It’s going to be a long wait for Tuesday night.”
This is why I’m falling so fast. His wistful eyes and impatience to be with me. The almost tangible pull between us. The dark scruff of his jaw. His thumb caressing my wrist. The tone of his voice when he talks about his family. Okay, every single thing about him has me falling too fast.
“Riley?” Someone shouts across the row of cars.
I push away from the van and Romeo to see Marcus staring at me from over the roof of his car. His roommate, Dan or something, stares too.
Shit. “Hey Marcus.” I step toward my car parked next to Romeo’s van. “What’s up? What movie did you guys see?”
He says some title but all I’m aware of is the burn of Romeo’s narrowed eyes on me. I’m hardly aware of Marcus’s question about what movie I watched, but as his words come closer, I break my stare with Romeo.
“So what movie did you guys see?” Marcus asks again mere feet from me.
