by Ava Walsh
“Everything will be easy, boy,” she said. “The only part that’s going to suck, and you know that I don’t exaggerate things, will be the first shifting.”
“As in?”
“As in, come full moon you will shift into a werewolf. None of us can keep ourselves from shifting during a full moon. Why do you think your dad comes here every full moon?”
“To hunt,” I said. “It’s just once a month, randomly. He never said anything about the full moon.”
“The full moon doesn’t follow your calendar dates. Anyway, even a person as strong as your father can’t resist it. You will be coming with him from now on.”
“Do all werewolves have to be here every full moon?”
“No, they don’t,” she replied politely. She thought for a moment. “But after what happened with Harrison and your mother, we believe it is for the best if they are.”
“What happened that night?”
“Your father used to lock himself in his study during full moons. Your mother had a spare key because she was working on renovating the study.”
“Then?”
“This one night she had forgotten something in there. She unlocked the door and there he was, shifting. Your brother was in her arms. They saw the whole thing, the complete shift from man to wolf. She lost it after that. We tried to talk some sense into her, but she was hell-bent on getting the word out. But then she lost it completely.”
“Why did you take Harrison?”
“Harrison was young. Your Grandpa believed that we could prevent serious trauma by bringing him here. Instead of traumatizing him, it would just open a door into a new dimension. I can remember the time when he came here, he was so quiet and meek. Look at him now! It’s worked out well. She-wolves throw themselves at him.”
“This is too just too much,” I said, and walked off into the woods. I found a quiet place near the fence boundary and looked outside, into the forest. It felt like I was losing my sanity, and I wished Siobhan was there. In the last two weeks, we had only been able to talk on the landline, and boring as it may sound, we had connected. Our ideas about life were similar, and although I’d never thought about marriage before, I believed that if I ever tied the knot, it would be with her. She got me. She was raised in a similar environment to me.
There was a rustle in the bushes. I turned around and saw a wolf staring at me with his bright, yellow eyes, fangs bared. I knew better than to be scared of it, but it was intimidating. It lurched forward to attack me, but shifted into Harrison.
“You scared me, man!” I panted, my heart pounding. “Why did you try to attack me?”
“I didn’t,” he said, grinning. “When shifting back, we just lurch forward like that.”
“Weird,” I said. “How did you find me?”
“I smelled you,” he said. “Your scent is new here, alien. Anybody can smell and track you anywhere on this entire mountain.”
“Right…”
“Come with me,” he said.
“Where?”
“I want to show you something.”
I followed him through the trees and the thorn bushes. There were paths inside the fence, covered with dirt and foliage. After slipping and crawling through this mountainous terrain, we came out on a lake. It looked ominous. The water was dark and still, and the visibility lower than other areas because of a thick fog. Large rocks and boulders surrounded half of the lake.
“This is where I used to hide when I was new here,” Harrison said.
“This looks dangerous.”
“You should come here during the day,” he said. “It’s an excellent spot for basking in the sun. We all come here to relax. This is also where the Alphas used to mate.”
“Alphas?”
“Leaders of our pack.”
“You mean Grandpa comes here?”
“Grandpa isn’t the Alpha. Father was, but he never came here to mate, because mom didn’t know about any of this.”
“Who’s the Alpha now?” I asked.
“I am,” he said, grinning. “After your training is complete, you will become the new Alpha.”
“Oh no, I don’t want to—”
“You have to,” he said. “During your first fight, you will challenge me. And since I have to train you in fighting, you will sure as shit beat me.”
“I’d rather not,” I said.
“You don’t have a choice. If you don’t challenge me, they’ll think of you as a weakling. If you lose, same results. Grandpa says we have to establish authority or the wolves start acting out.”
Another wolf came out from the trees.
“Who’s this?” I asked.
“Mishayev,” Harrison said.
She lurched forward and, like Harrison, shifted into herself.
“Listen,” Harrison said to me. “Grandpa wants to train you slowly. He thinks you can’t handle it. But I know you, and I know you can. We want to speed up your training. Trust us, okay?”
“Okay,” I said.
“Now, when you shift, don’t hurt either of us. We are both stronger than you think, and we’ll strike back. We won’t hold back.”
“What?”
“Once you shift,” he said, “remember not to let the wolf take over. Think of me, mom, dad, whoever.”
Mishayev threw a small stone at me, which hit me hard.
“Hey, what was that for?”
“Shift,” she said.
“How?”
Harrison threw another, hitting me on the forehead.
“This isn’t funny, guys. Stop it.”
“Shift,” she said, kicking me off my feet.
I fell to the ground. “Okay, stop it. You’re pissing me off now.”
“Shift,” he said, striking me with a stick.
“Fucking tell me how to shift.”
“Shift,” she hit me in the head.
“Shift,” he kicked me in the stomach.
“This is infuriating,” I shouted. I got up to punch Harrison, but he dodged me easily and kicked me in the shins.
“Shift,” Mishayev shouted again, tearing my shirt off and scratching my chest.
“Fucking bitch, stop it. Fuck off, both of you. Get away.”
“Shift,” she said, throwing a fistful of sand into my face.
My eyes watered and shut reflexively. I couldn’t see anything. I was panting now. All I heard was ‘Shift,’ and then I was being hit. The word ‘shift’ span in front of my vision, ringed in my ears, bounced in the darkness of my head. “Shift! Shift! Shift!”
My heart beat faster, like in the dreams. I could sense someone shifted. They bit my wrist, and blood oozed out. Anger rose up inside me, pulsing in my brain. I clenched my fists tightly.
“Shift.”
I tried to get up, got kicked, fell.
“Shift.”
The anger took over. I thought I was having a heart attack. I started moaning, my chest tightened, my lungs didn’t have enough air.
“Shift.”
I was in pain. I shouted, screamed, whimpered, moaned, shouted again, screamed again.
“Shift.” Another blow. Fuck, these assholes needed to—
I screamed like a bitch as my arms twisted and bended backward. My mouth felt strange, swollen. I couldn’t speak. I heard them in my mind. “Shift. Shift. Shift.” My heart pounded in my ears, “Dhub, dhuk, dhub, dhuk, dhub.” I heard another heartbeat and another. What was happening?
“Shift.”
Fuck this.
I got on all fours and looked around. The sand had cleared and I could see better now, better than I could before, as though I was wearing night vision goggles. She was on the left, standing still. He was standing on the right, looking at me. I turned to him, ran on all fours, and pounced. He dodged and grabbed me by the paws. His lips moved, but I ignored him. I wanted to get back at him for hitting me. She grabbed me from the back, pulling hard on my fur, then span me around and hurtled me into the water.
I ran back, ready
to attack. She grabbed me from behind again. He held my muzzle, said something. What was he saying? He held my what? Muzzle? What did he just say?
“Brother, come back. Harrod, focus. Remember. Take control.”
I stopped. He patted me, petted me like a dog. Then they shifted.
“You did well,” said Mishayev. I didn’t say thank you. I was still furious.
We jumped into the lake, swam, then they showed me around. The dawn was breaking. The stench was unbearable. Mishayev called it ‘scent’.
“You’ll get used to it,” she said.
We climbed the boulders and rested there, drying ourselves off. I thought of Siobhan. Tonight’s episode kept me from talking to her.
“We’ll continue the training tomorrow,” Harrison said.
We dried ourselves off and headed back to our cabins. I wondered what Siobhan would say about all this if she ever found out.
Once everyone was gone, I sneaked into Grandpa’s cabin.
“Grandpa,” I began. “There’s this girl I’m seeing. I don’t know what will happen if she finds out about all this.”
“Son,” he replied. “It is preferable if we choose from our own kind. But, if we don’t, it is better to tell them, if they can be trusted. Your mother couldn’t be trusted, or your father would’ve tried to convert her.”
“Convert her? Into a werewolf?”
He laughed, and I realized I sounded like a five-year-old. “Yes,” he said. “An Alpha’s bite can do that.”
We talked for a while as I learned more and more about my kind, then he went out and I returned to my cabin to sleep.
Chapter Nine - Lovesick
Siobhan
I was sick. With love. One night, that’s all it took. Perhaps it was lust, that desire for things we couldn’t have. Harrod disappeared the day after our night together. I was aching to see him again. I wanted to feel him feel me up again. I dreamed about him, about our night together. I didn’t regret waiting this long to have sex, because losing my virginity to him was worth it. I knew beyond the shadow of a doubt that I’ll never regret it.
All that dribble aside, the love had actually made me sick. It had been two weeks since he left, and I was a mess already. I was sitting on the bed in my jammies, my hair messed up, a trash bin at my side. I had some bug and I was puking like hell as I waited for his call. I couldn’t wait anymore. I was going to tell him exactly how I feel.
Then the phone rang.
“Hey, sweetpea.”
“Hello,” I replied hoarsely.
“I missed you.”
“I missed you too, Harry.”
“Are you okay? You don’t sound so—” Another wave of nausea hit me and I puked ruthlessly.
“Sorry, I’m sick. Anyway, when are you coming back?”
“I think it will be another week before I can come back,” he said.
“Why did you have to go all of a sudden? We should have followed up with the second date. This is torture, Harry. I need you.”
“Listen,” he said tentatively. “There’s something you need to know.”
“I’m listening,” I said.
“I can’t tell you over the phone. I…I need to show you something. I just don’t know…it’s complicated.”
“Well, tell me where you are and I’ll come over.”
“No, you’re unwell. Go see a doctor, get well, and then we’ll talk about it.”
“Harry,” I began. I needed to tell him how I felt. I couldn’t bottle these feelings inside for long. “Don’t freak out, okay?”
“Okay, what is it?”
“I think I am in love with you.”
“That’s a relief,” he said with phew. “I thought you were gonna say, ‘I’m pregnant’.”
“Is it too soon to say it?”
“Siobhan, I think about you all the time. I believe in taking things slowly, but the way I feel for you, if it isn’t love already, I don’t know what is.”
“I just…we had such good time. And now I feel like I’m losing you already.”
“You aren’t losing me, darling. Things are just complicated. I’ll figure something out. I’ll talk to my dad. We’ll see if we can get you here.”
“Update me as soon as you can,” I told him. “By the way, they asked me today if I wanted to have another lab partner because you were on leave. I said no, but now I’m working for two. When you come back, I’ll make you work thrice as hard.”
“Baby, I’ll work on you very hard once we’re together again.”
“I love you,” I said, before the next wave of nausea hit. “I think I should sleep now.”
“No, just keep talking to me. I look forward to talking to you all day. It’s the only thing that’s keeping me sane.”
“You know, I almost feel like punishing you by not talking to you right now, just like you abandoned me.”
“I didn’t abandon you, babe. Things came up, and when you know why, you’ll understand.”
“I won’t pester you by asking you to tell me now, but it better be soon.”
“It will be, I promise.”
“I love you, Siobhan.” He finally said the magical words and butterflies fluttered in my stomach.
“I love you, too,” I said, hanging up.
The butterflies in my stomach were too strong, and their fluttering didn’t go away the next morning. I finally booked an appointment with my GP. After all the preliminaries and everything, I ended up in the GP’s room.
“So,” she said, “you on a pill or something?”
“What pill?” I asked.
“Birth control?”
“No,” I said.
“When was the last time you had sex?”
“Almost three weeks ago, but—”
“Did you use protection?”
“No, but it was just that one time. I’m not pregnant.”
“I didn’t say you are, but you could be. Here,” she said, handing me a cup and a water bottle. “Drink the water, and then urinate in the cup.”
I did as she said, and then she told me I was pregnant. I didn’t say much. I asked her if she was sure, and she told me that sometimes the tests show as negative during early stages of pregnancy, “But positive is positive. We can do a blood test or an ultrasound if you want, but you are definitely pregnant.”
“No, that’s fine, thank you.”
I had to tell Harrod. I had to tell him before my own mother found out. I knew how my pregnancy could be used negatively in the media to tarnish her image. There were journalists who fed on such stuff and made stories out of it, but I wouldn’t let that happen.
I tried to call him all day but I couldn’t get through to him, so I went to his house instead. The officers refused to clear me because Harrod wasn’t home.
“Fine, don’t clear me. I’ll wait here until his father comes. I want to speak to him.”
“Ma’am, we can’t tell you when he’ll be back. He comes home late. Why don’t you—”
“Save it,” I said decisively. “I am not going anywhere.”
The officer sent some sort of message on his walkie-talkie. Then another guy came from the security cabin and cleared me to go.
“Mr. Ford is already on his way here. Please go on. The butler will receive you.”
When I reached the gates, I got out of the car and skipped off the road. I wanted to walk in those gardens again, but the second I stepped onto the grass, a loud voice shrieked from hidden speakers, “Get off the grass! Get off the grass!”
“Okay, okay,” I said, and got back on the path. It was a fifteen-minute walk to the house. When I got there, Gabe took me to the drawing room.
“Mr. Ford will be landing any minute now. He’ll join you shortly.”
The butler left and I waited for Harry’s dad to finally arrive. Once I had calmed down, I realized how stupid of me it was to come here. I didn’t know what I would say to him. I mean, what could I say? I love your son, bring him back?
Mr. Ford
cleared his throat loudly to let me know he’s there, and was followed by the butler. He waved Gabe off, shook my hand, grabbed two glasses and a bottle of scotch and sat down on the opposite sofa.
“Young lady,” he said. “You have been quite a nuisance to my security personnel.”
“I am sorry, Mr. Ford. I just—”
“It’s fine,” he said. “Tell me, what brings you here? It must have been important.”
“I just wanted to see Harrod. I have to talk to him about something. It’s really important.”
“Ah, you two are dating.” He said that more like a statement than a question.
“I’m not really sure you can call it that, but your son and I like each other very much.”
“‘Like’ wouldn’t have made you come all the way here, all the while knowing he wasn’t here.”
“No, we do love each other. It just seems strange to say it so soon, but we are probably headed in that direction.”
“You are cautious, just like your mother.”
“You know my mother?”
“Everybody knows your mother. Senator Daphna has been one of the finest.”
“But I never told Harrod about my mother. How do you know all this?”
“Your mother and I have crossed paths quite often, mostly on the wrong foot. She gives us a hard time in Congress. Nevertheless, like yourself, she is a brilliant woman. Dedicated, hardworking and passionate. We are acquainted.”
“Right, and I can guess what you do.”
“Best not to speak of it. Now, back to why you are here.”
“I’d much rather talk to him.”
“Except you know you can’t. So I’m all you have for the time being. Now you can tell me what it is and I’ll help you as I see fit, or you can wait till later tonight to talk to him. Take your pick and decide fast, because I don’t have all day.”
“I’m pregnant,” I blurted out. To say that Harrod’s father was intimidating would be an understatement. He sweetly pressurized me and then threw the time bomb. Or maybe I wa hormonal. I was normally better at staying calm.
