by Kumar, Lisa
“Yes. As I said, it doesn’t matter how we lose the choice. Once it is gone, it is gone forevermore.”
“That doesn’t seem fair.” Disbelief tinged her voice. She furrowed her brow.
Relian smothered a smile at her childishness. He merely shrugged. “When is it ever?”
“But I’m human. Maybe the rules or whatever you call them don’t apply to us in the same way?” The words tumbled out in hopeful eagerness.
Was she really so ready to desert him and the bond they started to share? As his heart lurched in a most unbecoming way, Relian couldn’t stop the accusatory glare he sent her way. He didn’t like this turn in conversation at all, and it did nothing to improve his mood. “Regardless, the outcome is the same for me. It’s seeking to finish the bond it began.”
“What is seeking to finish the bond?” Her forehead now creased in puzzlement rather than in its previous disapproval.
“The binding. The binding is essentially the beginning stages of the bond. It wants to be completed. It desires to be completed.”
She glanced away, her hands twisting in the skirt of her dress. “What happens if we don’t complete it? I mean, besides never having another chance to bond again? Are there any negative effects? Your father mentioned something about consequences. But since we didn’t ask for this, surely there’s a way out. Not everyone can be happy to be betrothed this way.”
The conversation headed into dangerous territory. She was under the misapprehension their binding was brought about the normal way. He didn’t desire to tell her even part of the truth, because one answered question could lead to a thousand unanswerable ones. Any information about how unusual their situation was, beyond the apparent, would have to be carefully controlled and released at the appropriate time. At least until they could assess her adaptability and discover why the veil wanted her here.
Total omission, though, wouldn’t serve him well on this occasion. If he wanted her to go through with the ceremony, some measure of candor would likely sway her in his favor. But the whole truth could very well close her mind to further considerations of their binding or push her emotional stability over the limits. “My people accept the binding for the gift it is.” Because in their cases, it’s something they seek willingly. He left this part of his sentence unsaid. “As for any negative consequence, I cannot say for myself, as I’ve never experienced it. But I’ve heard that the joy of living is not as strong as before. Unfortunately, the soul loses something of itself when a bind or bond is broken. It’s hard to ever be quite the same again.”
She gasped, as if doing so would negate his words, and faced him. “I would condemn you to be a broken man….elf?”
“Not broken. If severed early enough, I would become an elf who changes because he lost something he can never regain.” He gave a shrug. What else could he say? “I cannot explain it more fully than that.”
He’d simplified it quite a bit for her, but the core fact remained: one cannot break a binding without cost. No matter how he might begrudge the fact, part of his soul was entwined with hers—not fully yet, but enough to negatively affect him if the binding remained uncompleted. Soon, even that would change, and he wouldn’t be able to let her go. Not when his sanity counted on it. Death would be a welcome release, one he’d be guaranteed.
His heart clenched. Death. She was mortal, and death came easily to people such as she. That ghostly specter visited his people much more rarely. For his kind, this was a blessing and a curse. Loss and a nearly endless life didn’t combine well. For those with any kind of bond, it was doubly worse.
However, to burden her with this knowledge was wrong. The time for pressure of that kind would come later, if need be. The illusion she had some control would keep her calm and pliant. At least that’s what he told himself. That he didn’t want to destroy her hopes shouldn’t matter, couldn’t matter.
Cal stared at him and then at her hands, seeming to ponder something. She raised her face, her glassy eyes searching his. After she hesitated a few seconds, her subdued tone reached his ears. “Would I feel the same? As you?”
“Since you’re human I suspect you would feel the same, except to a lesser degree.” A rapid fire of emotions flitted across her face as she processed this information.
“So I would never be truly happy again? Is that what you’re saying?” Her voice rose a little.
“I wouldn’t say ‘never happy.’ There would just be a lingering melancholy present most times.”
“That sounds like unhappy to me,” she cried, wringing her hands.
He sighed. It sounded that way to him, too. Not that he would ever admit it to her. “I don’t know what else to say. This is the best I can describe it.”
“How can you be so calm?” she snapped, her agitation growing.
“Young one, I’m not calm, just resigned. There’s nothing I can do to change it, nor can you. You must realize this, no matter what course you choose.”
“What course I choose? And stop calling me young one. Considering what you want of me, that’s just freaky.”
Relian fought his impatience, his frayed fabric of nerves threatening to tear beyond any stitches he could give it. “There are but two choices before you. Yes or no, you must pick one.” He kept his voice a steady monotone.
“Yes or no?” she questioned dumbly.
His temper snapped to life. “The binding! Yes or no to the binding,” he retorted more hotly than he intended. This woman tried his patience like no other.
Cal jumped a little in her seat, and alarm spread over her face. Relian didn’t know if it was from the news he imparted or the way he imparted it. He swore under his breath. Why did he overreact around her? He felt like a young elfling who had no control over himself or his words.
Her hand shakily tucked a tendril of hair behind an ear, and he watched, fascinated. A sudden desire to see that glorious hair spilling around her shoulders rocketed through him. It would be a wondrous sight, as it had been in his dreams. He just knew it.
“I’m sorry, but all this is new to me. I need...I need time to think, and I can't possibly make a decision of that magnitude right now.”
Her plaintive words broke through his haze. Shame washed over him. He’d resolved to be more patient. Indeed, his father rebuked him to take more caution with her. But what was he doing instead? He surely didn’t show the calm exterior in which most elves prided themselves.
He forced his pulse to stop its upward spiral. “Nay, no one is asking for an answer right now.” At least, not until they pressed her to give one. His voice sounded hollow and empty to his ears. “All we attempt right now is to make your stay and your friend’s as comfortable as we may. Nothing more.”
Hopefully, she didn’t give his people cause to make her stay unpleasant, for they could and would if they saw the need. Much rested on what she didn’t understand, on what they didn’t understand.
“How long will I have to decide before….”
He inwardly cringed. “A few weeks, at most.”
No matter her decision, he couldn’t allow her to go home.
Chapter 13
Cal’s heart sped up but not from happiness. Her stay here? A few weeks to decide? She didn’t like the sound of that at all. Mustering all the firmness she could, she worked to keep her voice level. “A few weeks? I can’t stay here that long. Maggie, either. We have lives to live and families who will worry.” Her coveted "normal" life threatened to drain away like water from a sink, taking her college dreams along with it.
Relian responded to her rant by turning an inscrutable face toward her. Her cheeks flushed red, and her temper soared. Cal felt like a child throwing a temper tantrum, but his attitude drove her ape-crazy. She hadn’t asked for any of this, and now her life was spinning out of control.
Cal threw up her hands. “You know what? I don’t believe I want or desire your hospitality. In fact, I don’t want to stay here at all, not for another minute.” She glued a look of pride on
her face and stood up. “I’ll come to a decision at home—one that never brings me back here.”
Now that she’d stood up, Cal didn’t know where to go. A multitude of flowers and plants surrounded her. She’d no way of finding her way out of the garden, let alone finding a way to her world.
Deflated, she put her trembling arms around herself in a comforting, yet defensive hold. What a complete fool she made of herself. But she didn’t want to ask him for help. Relian sighed from somewhere behind her, but she refused to turn around and acknowledge him.
When a hand touched her shoulder, Cal shrieked. Spinning back toward the bench, she came face-to-chest with Relian. How’d he tread so quietly? He was close, so close she almost collided against him.
Even though she wanted to turn away, the brocade of his robe gleaming in the waning light mesmerized her. All her senses flared alive and slipped beyond her control, like floodwaters through a raptured dam. Her fingers itched to reach out and touch the smooth-looking fabric that covered his strong chest. The fragrance of pine and sandalwood inundated her already beleaguered senses. She wanted to close her eyes and savor the pleasant aroma. She wanted to rub her face against his chest like a cat that rubbed against a catnip-infused toy. Horrified by her thoughts, she tore her gaze from his chest and made the mistake of glancing up and falling into gray seas.
Cal was sinking, drowning as he held her captive with his eyes. She couldn’t get a solid grip on land. Those eyes haunted her, had always haunted her, it seemed. The blue pupils glowed against their darker gray backdrop and made the whites of his eyes appear even more startling in their brilliance. Her mind grappled with the idea she dealt with someone out of her league, someone not human. Just when she could take no more, Relian broke the moment by shaking his head and gazing over her shoulder. The relief that crashed over her made her nauseous in its intensity.
He was silent for a few moments before he spoke. “The veil brought you here. It’s unlikely to take you back yet, if at all.”
If at all? What had happened to a couple of weeks? More panic at that thought should’ve welled up. But her mind couldn’t settle on that right now. Her body and mind numb, slight puzzlement was all she could manage. “The veil?”
He avoided her gaze. Her heart was the first thing to awaken, where it promptly dropped into her stomach and renewed her receding nausea. The sensation fueled her anger. What was so secret?
As her frustration built up like a geyser, he answered. “It is the mist that brought you here.”
Why did he give such cryptic answers? That told her nothing of what the veil actually was and why it brought her here.
He glanced down and locked his gaze with hers. “The veil is what separates your world from ours.”
Bafflement hit her. “How?” The mist hadn’t seemed to separate anything. It appeared out of nowhere and left as unpredictably.
Relian gave an elegant shrug. “The exact basics aren’t known. Magic controls it, the same magic of which it’s composed. I believe that is enough for today. The history lesson can wait. There will be time for further talk of it later.”
Cal wanted to pout like a petulant child. A look at his steely face told her it wouldn’t work. She threw him an aggravated look.
“May I show you to your guest quarters?” Without waiting for her acceptance, he took her arm and started to lead her back through the gardens.
Fighting back a yawn, Cal allowed him to do so without protest. She was tired and wanted to see Maggie. “Will it be near Maggie’s or can we share?”
“We will provide you with adjoining chambers. Will that be sufficient? What you do after that is your choice.”
She winced at the arctic tone in his voice. His demeanor scraped like sandpaper against her frazzled nerves. Feeling cold all of a sudden, she shivered.
Her troublesome hair took this chance to flop into her eyes again. With a huff, she reached for the errant piece. Relian stretched a long-fingered hand forward and gently tucked the lock behind her ear. Her breath stilled. She couldn’t reconcile such a tender act with his icy manner.
Astonished, she searched his face. He gazed at her with a strange expression on his face. His stare…it was too much, too intense. She girded herself to not look away, to stand firm, though hormones ran riot through her. What would he do if she reached up and pulled his mouth to hers? Her hands curled into fists. She wouldn’t make the first move.
How long would she and Relian stand this way? But the moment ended when he composed himself, his face returning to its normal calm mask. Whatever emotion he’d experienced, he now tightly locked away from her view. He pulled her onto a main path that hopefully led to the palace and Maggie.
***
“Details, girl, give me details!” Maggie demanded as she bounced on the tall bed in Cal’s quarters.
Cal stared at her exuberant friend before giving her a droll look. “You act like I just went on a date.”
“Well, if the shoe fits, dance in it, as I say.” At Cal’s expression of disbelief, Maggie grinned. “What? It’s so true.”
Not responding, Cal went to stand near the balcony that almost stretched the length of the wall. She wasn’t sure what to tell her friend, as she didn’t understand half of what had occurred herself. Everything had quickly become a haze—her feelings, any understanding she’d gained of Relian and the whole situation, and finally, their walk back to the palace. He’d explained certain points of interest in the gardens they passed. Though she listened, her mind wouldn’t comply with processing any requests. Even now it still spun from all she’d learned.
Meeting up with the other couple, he’d led them through a dizzying array of corridors and hallways, each lovely in their own way. But the beauty around her hadn’t soothed. Her surroundings just exacerbated her confusion. Everything looked odd and foreign. In the enclosed hallways, sheer fabric, gently blowing in the breeze, covered the windows. Shutters that could apparently be drawn shut to keep out inclement weather elicited a frown from her. She hadn’t seen any glass panes or screens. For some reason that fact bothered her. How could windows not have glass or some kind of screen?
Cal’s mind shifted back to the present when Maggie spoke again. “I wonder how long we’ll be in this place.”
“The palace?”
“The palace, this world—take your pick.”
Cal shrugged. “Relian didn’t give me a specific end date, if that’s what you mean.”
“I figured, and I have a feeling the king and his son will keep you here as long as possible.”
“They have a vested interest in doing so.”
“But how far will they go to keep you here? I know you are supposedly Relian’s “soul mate,” so will they let you go if you don’t want to stay?”
“All questions I can’t answer.” Cal flopped onto the bed beside Maggie. “Was Kenhel anymore helpful?”
“What do you think?”
“Uh, no.” She hadn’t really thought Maggie would learn anything. The elves seemed reticent. They offered bits and pieces willingly, but she had the feeling they left much unsaid.
“Guessed that in one!” Maggie suddenly stopped bouncing and deflated, bending over to hug her knees. “I’m tired. Too much action for me.”
Cal forced a teasing note to her voice. “I never thought to hear those words from your mouth.”
“Well, write it down—you did.” Maggie threw herself back on the bed and grinned. “This bed is heavenly. Try it.”
Cal complied. “This is some place, isn’t it?”
Both women perused the room, taking in all it had to offer. The chamber, just like its connecting suite, was grand. Even to Cal’s untrained eye, the room screamed out elegant craftsmanship wherever she looked. The finest silks and linens outfitted the bed with exquisitely embroidered perfection that could’ve graced the finest luxury home magazines. Tapestries and other hangings lined the stone walls.
“It’s too perfect.” Maggie gestured wildly arou
nd her. “You know, it’s not natural.”
“The room?”
“The room, the whole place.”
Cal stretched her arms above her head while considering what Maggie had said. After a few moments, she nodded in agreement. “Even the people appear that way. They have that certain air to them. Though they look perfect, there’s something I can’t quite put my finger on. Maybe it’s the quality of reserve and mystery that hangs about them.”
“Repressed!” chortled Maggie, apparently finding it hilarious to imagine repressed elves.
Cal gave a small chuckle. “No, I actually wasn’t aiming for that word, believe it or not. Like I said, they have this mysterious quality, and I think they know full well what they’re doing. That’s what scares me. There’s more going on here than what we’ve been told.”
Maggie’s smile slipped from her face. “I know what you mean. They’re very carefully controlled, demeanor-wise. So what’s underneath? And are we as mysterious to them?”
“You know as much as I do. It’s a confusing place, and we haven’t been here for a day yet. Oh, and you better be careful lest you start sounding like them.”
Maggie pouted. “Me? At least I just said ‘mysterious’ and not ‘lest.’ That’s such an old-fashioned word.”
In answer, Cal picked up a green silk pillow and aimed it at her friend’s head. Maggie let out a surprised squeak, diving to the other side of the huge bed. “That’s behavior unfitting a future princess, don’t you think?”
Another pillow made its mark this time.
Chapter 14
Relian shifted in his chair as the walls of his father’s study closed in about him. He, Talion, and Kenhel were to discuss the recent happenings in an unofficial capacity. What better time to do so than when most everyone amused themselves in a celebration?
His father folded his hands on the desk, looking across at him. “Did you send a chambermaid to them?”
“Not as of yet. I did assign one to them but gave the maid instruction to not disturb them for a few hours.”
