The Best British Short Stories 2013
Page 19
Thus we did the Mendelssohn, the Brahms, two of the Mozarts. The patches, the grafts, were getting longer, but by careful choice of stock, and care in sending out the review copies, I got away with it. But for how long? Her stamina was depleting, though the resolve was still there.
Then came the moment I had been dreading. She brought up my promise to record her in the Delius. Perhaps sentimentally as well as artistically, she was determined to hold me to it.
What the hell to do? There were so few recordings to draw on. The Pougnet/Beecham of 1946 was too well known, too distinctive. What else was there?
Then, almost in despair, I came across a reference to yours. I wrote to your company’s distributor in Sweden for a copy.
It was – is – a wonderful performance. You may suspect flattery in that, but to counterfeit a phrase, plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery.
I found it pure-toned, coolly lyrical, so similar to my memories of Eleanor’s performance. And, luckily from my view, unknown outside Scandinavia.
I arranged the venue and orchestra and we began recording. I took the precaution of setting Eleanor well forward from the orchestra – the close-miking now would hardly matter.
In spirit she was inspired. But as I feared, I was able to use hardly any of it. I got her to repeat a few passages for form’s sake. But the finished record was, I have to confess, almost entirely yours.
Not the opening bars, though. Those were hers, and are sublime, as I hope you’ll agree. If only she’d been able to maintain . . .
None of this is meant in mitigation. I just want you to understand.
I delayed the release as long as I could, but Eleanor became increasingly impatient as she declined. I gave in, coupled it with the still unreleased Berkeley and brought it out. I sent out only limited review copies. Ironically, they were very well received, you will be pleased to hear.
It sold moderately well for a while, then went the way of most recordings – n.l.a. in the catalogues.
So it would, should, have remained, had I not been foolishly persuaded to re-release it on compact disc in her memory. That decision, and the boy’s-own sleuthing in the musical press – but no! It’s as well it was found out. I have opportunity to make amends, to you at least. And I’ll be with Eleanor the sooner.
I hope this letter reaches you still alive.
Brockleby-Barr my dear sir,
How gratifying your package, I found. My eyes give trouble in these late days, so I played first the disc before reading your letter. Thankfully. For I was entranced.
Yes, they are not my opening bars, and this threw me off the scent, as you say. But how assured, how beautifully judged. And later too, the yearning, infinity pitied passages of the slow movement, so sadly lovely. The arpeggios in the cadenza, the 4/4 dance rhythms of the scherzo, so hard to make lyrical – these I admired.
Then my attention snagged (is this correct?) on the clarinet’s second figure in the closing bars. He plays an A. It should have been A flat. I was reminded of a similar mistake in our recording. A coincidence? An error in the score?
And the violin’s fading close – not as whispering as I would have liked.
Then I summoned my attention to your letter, to discover this was indeed my own performance. What strange elation I felt at first.
Your Scottish poet tells of the gift to see ourselves through other’s eyes, or ears. This, my dear sir, is what you gave me. And how proud it made me for a time. For the praise of others is a poor substitute for one’s own self-worth. And that is in normal life denied the artists. We know only the frustration, the failures, the wasted attempts.
My defence lay in giving only public concerts, in giving up recording altogether. My recording company pressed to record my concerts live, but no. I had no wish to preserve my errors with the coughs of auditors on plastic for posterity.
I have not even played your disc again, for the same reason, in fear of all the old dissatisfactions flooding in. Within minutes of the realisation it was mine, I was remembering the difficulties of those 4/4 passages, the number of takes, the final abandonment. Also the second, and third, thoughts on the tempi of the cadenza, the linger of the close . . . All the elation rubbed away.
But for those minutes I was happy, a happiness I had not expected. I had glimpsed of freedom, a moment perfection. I was grateful.
I hope you read my clumsy hand, and that in my turn, this letter finds you still alive.
Contributors’ Biographies
Charles Boyle has published a number of poetry collections (for which he was shortlisted for the TS Eliot, Forward and Whitbread prizes), a short novel (McKitterick Prize, 2008) under the pen-name Jennie Walker, and two books combining text and photography (under the pen-name Jack Robinson). He runs the small press CB editions.
Regi Claire is the author of the story collections Inside~Outside and Fighting It, both shortlisted for a Saltire Book of the Year Award, and two novels, The Beauty Room and The Waiting. She was born and brought up in Switzerland but now lives in Edinburgh, where she teaches creative writing at the Scottish National Gallery. She is a Royal Literary Fund Fellow at Queen Margaret University.
Laura Del-Rivo was born in Surrey in 1934. Her first novel, The Furnished Room (1961), filmed by Michael Winner as West 11 (1963), was reissued by New London Editions in 2011. Two of her short stories have appeared online at 3:AM Magazine and a collection, Where is My Mask of an Honest Man, is forthcoming from Holland Park Press. She lives in Notting Hill and runs a stall at Portobello Market.
Lesley Glaister has written thirteen novels, the most recent, Little Egypt, to be published by Salt in 2014. Her stories have been anthologised and broadcast on Radio 4. She has written drama for radio and stage. Lesley is a Fellow of the RSL, teaches creative writing at the University of St Andrews and lives in Edinburgh.
MJ Hyland is the author of three novels, including Carry Me Down, which was shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize. She is a lecturer in creative writing at the University of Manchester and co-founder of the Hyland & Byrne editing firm. Her most recent novel is This is How.
Jackie Kay is a poet, novelist and short story writer. Her novel Trumpet won the Guardian Fiction Prize and the autobiographical Red Dust Road won the 2011 Book of the Year at the Scottish Book Awards. She lives in Manchester and teaches at Newcastle University.
Nina Killham is the author of three novels – How to Cook a Tart, Mounting Desire and Believe Me. She also writes short stories and screenplays. She holds dual British-American nationality. She lived in Crouch End, north London, with her family for 15 years and has just moved to Melbourne.
Charles Lambert is the author of two novels, Little Monsters and Any Human Face, and a collection of short stories, The Scent of Cinnamon. He lives in Italy. Forthcoming are a psychological thriller The View From the Tower (Exhibit A) and With a Zero at Its Heart (The Friday Project), a series of 120-word texts, arranged by theme, adding up to a picture of one man’s life.
Adam Lively has published four novels and also worked as a producer/director of TV documentaries. He is currently working on a collection of interlinked stories and completing a doctorate at the University of London on cognitive dimensions of narrative.
Anneliese Mackintosh’s short stories have appeared in Edinburgh Review, Gutter, Causeway/Cabhsair, Valve Journal and elsewhere. Her fiction has been broadcast on BBC Radio 4 and BBC Radio Scotland. In 2012 she was shortlisted for the Bridport Prize and won first prize for the Unbound Press Short Story Award. She lives in Manchester.
Adam Marek is the author of two story collections – Instruction Manual For Swallowing and The Stone Thrower – both published by Comma Press. He won the 2011 Arts Foundation Short Story Fellowship, and was shortlisted for the inaugural Sunday Times EFG Short Story Award. His stories have appeared in many magazines and anthologies. Visit Adam online at www.adammarek.co.uk
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Alison Moore’s first novel, The Lighthouse (Salt), was shortlisted for the Man Booker Prize 2012 and in the New Writer of the Year category of the National Book Awards 2012. Born in Manchester in 1971, Alison Moore lives near Nottingham. Her debut collection, The Pre-War House and Other Stories, is published by Salt.
Alex Preston is the award-winning author of This Bleeding City and The Revelations (Faber 2010, 2012). He is a journalist and critic and was a regular panellist on BBC2’s The Review Show.
Ross Raisin was born in 1979 in Silsden, West Yorkshire. His first novel, God’s Own Country, was published in 2008 and went on to be shortlisted for nine awards. His second novel, Waterline, was published in 2011. In 2009, he was named Sunday Times Young Writer of the Year.
David Rose was born in 1949 and spent his working life in the Post Office. His debut story was published in the Literary Review (1989), since when he has been widely published in magazines in the UK and Canada. He was joint owner and fiction editor of Main Street Journal. His first novel, Vault, was published by Salt in 2011; a collection, Postumous Stories, is forthcoming.
Ellis Sharp was born in Harrogate. His short stories have appeared in numerous fringe publications and a selection entitled Dead Iraqis was published by New Ventures in 2009. He is also the author of four novels: The Dump, Unbelievable Things, Walthamstow Central and Intolerable Tongues.
Robert Shearman has published three collections – Tiny Deaths, Love Songs for the Shy and Cynical and Everyone’s Just So So Special. An award-winning playwright, radio dramatist and Doctor Who screenwriter, he is currently writing 100 new stories, one each for those readers who bought the leatherbound limited edition of Everyone’s Just So So Special. The stories are posted online at justsosospecial.com.
Nikesh Shukla is the author of the Costa First Novel-shortlisted Coconut Unlimited, an e-book about the 2011 riots, Generation Vexed (with Kieran Yates), and Kabadasses for Channel 4 Comedy Lab. His stories have appeared in the Book Slam anthology, The Moth and the Sunday Times online, and have been broadcast on BBC Radio 4. He was born in London and now lives in Bristol.
James Wall has an MA in Writing from Sheffield Hallam University and was shortlisted for the Bridport Prize in 2010. His work has previously been published in Matter, The View From Here and Tears in the Fence.
Guy Ware was born in Northampton and studied English at Oxford. He has published stories in various anthologies and his debut collection, You Have 24 Hours to Love Us, is published by Comma Press. He lives with his family in London.
Acknowledgements
The editor wishes to thank AJ Ashworth, Elizabeth Baines, Bernadette Jansen op de Haar and Cathi Unsworth.
‘Budapest’, copyright © Charles Boyle 2012, was first published in the Warwick Review, March 2012, and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘The Tasting’, copyright © Regi Claire 2012, was first published in Ambit 210 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘J Krissman in the Park’, copyright © Laura Del-Rivo 2012, was first published online in 3:AM Magazine and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Just Watch Me’, copyright © Lesley Glaister 2012, was first published in Edinburgh Review 135 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Even Pretty Eyes Commit Crimes’, copyright © MJ Hyland 2012, was first published online in Granta and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Mrs Vadnie Marlene Sevlon’, copyright © Jackie Kay 2012, was first published in Reality, Reality (Picador) and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘My Wife the Hyena’, copyright © Nina Killham 2012, was first published in Still, ed Roelof Bakker (Negative Press London), and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Curtains’, copyright © Charles Lambert 2012, was first published in Willesden Herald New Short Stories 6, ed Stephen Moran (Pretend Genius Press), and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Voyage’, copyright © Adam Lively 2012, was first published in Stand 197 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Doctors’, copyright © Anneliese Mackintosh 2012, was first published in Edinburgh Review 134 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘The Stormchasers’, copyright © Adam Marek 2012, was first published in The Stone Thrower (Comma Press) and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘The Smell of the Slaughterhouse’, copyright © Alison Moore 2012, was first published in The New Writer 111 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘The Swimmer in the Desert’, copyright © Alex Preston 2012, was first published online in Fleeting and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘When You Grow into Yourself’, copyright © Ross Raisin 2012, was first published in Granta 119 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Eleanor: The End Notes’, copyright © David Rose 2012, was first published in Unthology 3, ed Robin Jones and Ashley Stokes (Unthank Books), and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘The Writer’, copyright © Ellis Sharp 2012, was first published in Labyrinths 43 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Bedtime Stories For Yasmin’, copyright © Robert Shearman 2012, was first published in Shadows & Tall Trees 4 and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Canute’, copyright © Nikesh Shukla 2012, was first published in First City, October 2012, and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Dancing to Nat King Cole’, copyright © James Wall 2012, was first published online in The View From Here and is reprinted by permission of the author.
‘Hostage’, copyright © Guy Ware 2012, was first published in You Have 24 Hours to Love Us (Comma Press) and is reprinted by permission of the author.