“Maybe a little, but not enough to want to do it.”
“Choked? Erotic asphyxia?”
“Ummm, kinda? It’s hot when I can’t breathe during a blow job, but no one’s ever choked me on purpose.”
“I know you have to comply to sex on demand, but I’d like to know how you feel about it.”
I shrugged as I set the Mississippi mud cake to the side and started organizing ingredients for the cornbread. “I don’t go to the clubhouse if I’m not up for sex.”
“Are there any you don’t like having to service, but have to when they want it?”
“You’re supposed to make the questions generic so we don’t bring the MC into it.”
“Sorry. I thought I was making the cornbread?”
“You are. I texted you the recipe, and here are the ingredients.”
About an hour later we sat down to a feast fit for a king. Or, at least a couple of werewolves. He moaned as he took his first bite of the pork chops, and I grinned as I prepared for my first bite.
“We did good,” I told him as I swallowed, and he nodded as he tried the mashed potatoes.
* * *
When it was finally time for me to change the next evening for our full moon run, I was nearly out of my mind with the need to run on four legs.
I’d come so close to changing when the moon had gone totally full on the other side of the planet that morning, but Patrick had held my arms behind my back so my shoulders hurt when I tried to shift, and I forced myself to reverse the change to get relief on those joints. It’d lasted maybe four or five minutes, but it’d been painful to stay human. Patrick had just made it more painful to turn wolf — though not by much.
Later, he’d made me run with him in human form, he’d put me in the wire frame with Flopsy a while, and we’d eaten all fucking day. If I was still human I’d have gained ten pounds.
I’d called Angelica the night before to tell her I’d be staying here to run with Patrick. Surprisingly, Dozer had called me about fifteen minutes later to check on me and make sure I was okay. I guess he’d just wanted to be sure I wasn’t being bullied by the Pack, maybe. I assured him I was fine, and he reminded me if I needed help I only had to let him know.
“I’m glad you have people to back you up,” Patrick said as I disconnected. “Most lone wolves don’t have that.”
I nodded. “Yeah. My wolf is happy being able to hang out at the clubhouse.”
And now, we were walking across the field naked, preparing to change once we were under the cover of the forest. It wasn’t fully dark yet, but I wasn’t sure I’d last another thirty minutes. The cows and chickens were in for the night and fed, the house was locked, and we had the night to run.
My change as the moon rose above the horizon felt better than it’s ever felt — the difference between sawing through a tree with a dull knife, and letting a sharp knife sink through warm butter. I was human, and thirty seconds later I was wolf. It was more than the speed, though. Everything shifted in the right order, so the bones and muscles worked with each other and it all just happened.
Patrick’s change was almost instantaneous, and he was waiting for me when I finally took my first steps.
Running as a wolf is so freeing, so exhilarating. You know how everything feels different in a sports car than it does in a truck? You’re lower to the ground, you can take curves better, and you have more power. With four legs propelling you forward instead of two, and when you’re aerodynamic, and your body is literally made for running — nothing can beat the sensation. I’d waited to feel this all my life and I loved every second of it.
And running under the huge full moon hanging in the night sky, with the pull of the moon against gravity, and the magic of the night? It was better than I’d ever imagined. The silvery moonlight highlighted every leaf, the sounds and smells helped finish out the picture, and the forest was ours.
Patrick’s wolf was clearly dominant, and my wolf had no problem letting him lead. She got a little ticked when he wouldn’t let her eat the deer with him, but it didn’t change the fact we couldn’t eat until he let us.
Pronouns are so hard now that I’m two beings. Sometimes it feels right to say ‘I’, but other times the only way to explain it is to use ‘us’.
Patrick and I slept in the woods, awakened as wolves, and made our way back to the farmhouse as the sun rose. We changed back to human at the last moment, just before we stepped into the back door, and then only because we needed thumbs to open it.
We were both silent as we cooked eggs, bacon, sausage, gravy, and biscuits, and I finally spoke as we took our plates outside to the porch to eat.
“Thanks for helping me stay human until last night. It wasn’t easy and I know I called you names a few times, but it’s appreciated.”
“I fly out of town tomorrow and probably won’t be home until Tuesday, but I’d like for you to talk to Maggie about going back and forth from her house to mine, depending on when I’m in town. I think you gained something in the beginning by being forced into the alpha role, but Evie isn’t here and I’m not sure it benefits you to be the strongest wolf around anymore.”
“Is that an invitation?”
He nodded. “It is, and I don’t make it lightly. I want to get to know you better. I’ve already told you there’ll be rules — living with me won’t be easy, but most things worth doing aren’t easy.”
“I’ll talk to Maggie and Angelica, but my initial response is to plan to spend two days with you next week, and then we’ll see where we want to go from there. I appreciate the offer, and my wolf wants me to take you up on it right away.”
He tilted his head. “Our wolves are in agreement, then.”
“Am I going to feel the moon all day today? Will I need to change tonight when it rises? Or should I be okay since we ran last night?”
“You’ll feel it, but it won’t be like yesterday. I’ll go home when Maggie arrives because I know you’ll be okay without me. Also, it won’t set you back any if the two of you want to run together tonight.”
* * *
Maggie checked on the animals first thing, and then hugged me as she thanked me for taking care of them.
“Not a problem. Well, waking up early to keep the cows on their milking schedule was a pain in the ass, but I’m glad I could help. How’s Evie?”
“She’s doing amazing, but I worry it’s because Randall’s close. What if she can’t hold it together when she’s away from him?”
“He’ll teach her, and he won’t let her leave until he’s sure she’ll be able to maintain control without him. As far as Alphas go, he’s one of the good guys. If my wolf had come on when she was supposed to, I’d have gladly been part of his Pack.”
“But you feel as if he turned his back on you, and you can’t let him accept you back now?”
I nodded and changed the subject. “I had Patrick buy a ham, and I made it into country ham yesterday. How about ham, eggs, biscuits, and gravy for breakfast?”
“Sure, but you have to tell me what happened with Patrick. The two of you acted like you’re together, all comfortable around each other, but then you just hugged when he left! No kiss?! Something isn’t adding up.”
“Honestly, I have no idea. He’s going out of town on a job, and he’s invited me to his house for a few days next week after he returns. I can’t go home to my apartment, but he says his house backs up to forest property he owns, so I’ll be good to go if I can’t hold my human form.”
“Okay, but what happened since I left?”
“He doesn’t get sexually or romantically involved when he’s on a job, and I guess since Randall put him here with instructions to keep me safe and help me with my wolf, he wouldn’t take the extra step. I’m hoping things’ll be different when I’m invited to his house.” I couldn’t tell her about Junior, so this was as close to the truth as I could get.
We ran together that night, and had a relaxing couple of days once the moon was no longer dema
nding I run on four legs.
Maggie was as amused at my attachment to Flopsy as Patrick had been, but when I offered to buy her and take her home, Maggie said, “She’s yours. You know I bought them all as feeders for you and Evie’s wolves, but if you want to make her a pet then more power to you.”
I researched ways to play with pet rabbits, and had Maggie pick up a small ball and a slinky the next time she was in town. It turned out Flopsy loved the slinky, and I spent many hours on the floor of the screened in back porch playing with her, once Maggie gave the okay to have her there.
The next week I made plans to clean Gonzo’s house one day and McGyver’s house the next. I was shocked to learn Gonzo had taken himself off the market, and even more surprised to see a smile on his eternally grumpy face. He also gave me advice no one else had given me, and it helped so fucking much. He told me I could make deals with my wolf, offer to give her something in return for letting me have my way during a difficult time. I’d been looking at her as my adversary when she wanted me to change but I needed to stay human, and this tactic completely altered my approach to those times.
McGyver has a fancy doorbell that rings his cellphone with a video of whoever’s at his door. He let me in to clean even though he wasn’t home, and had left my cash on his kitchen table. I’d been looking forward to having sex with Gonzo and McGyver, and was more than a little disappointed when I went home without any.
I knew I’d get some if I could stop by the clubhouse, but there are frequently humans in there so I didn’t dare try.
Patrick had texted me Monday night to tell me he’d pick me up Wednesday around three in the afternoon in a van, and to warn me I’d be in a cage in the back in case I changed.
Chapter 11
Patrick
I had no idea how Briana would handle what I’d planned, but my wolf was insisting I not go easy on her for the break-in period.
She’d either be okay with my lifestyle, or she wouldn’t.
I checked out one of the Drake vehicles to transport her. The cage in the back is strong enough to hold a lion, so it’d hold her with no problem.
She’d ordered a cage for Flopsy, and asked if I was okay with her bringing her new pet. She said Maggie had made her leave the cage on the back porch, but I told her she could bring the little thing in the house as long as it didn’t make a mess.
A wolf with a pet bunny may seem absurd, but bitten wolves find all kinds of ways to keep their humanity. I’d do what I could to encourage the budding relationship she had with her bunny.
She was on the front porch swing with her e-reader when I pulled up, and I noted the small rolling suitcase beside Flopsy’s cage at the top of the steps, and a duffle with Flopsy’s name embroidered on the side.
“Your rabbit has her own luggage?” I asked with a smile.
“Maggie’s sewing machine does all kinds of cool things. I had her buy me a cheap blanket when she went into town, and I made the duffel and put Flopsy’s name on it. I have enough fabric to make some more stuff — just haven’t figured out what yet. How was your trip?”
She sews? Well, little Briana was full of surprises. “Uneventful, thank goodness. When did you last eat?”
“About an hour ago.”
I pulled a chair from the other side of the porch and sat a few feet from her. Maggie’s car was gone and I didn’t hear her heartbeat, so it was safe to talk to Briana about this here.
“There are some things you need to know before I take you home, because it isn’t fair to pull you into this if you aren’t aware.”
She tilted her head, curious without making judgements, and I continued. “I didn’t oath to Randall as a Pack member. He oathed me in with the ceremony he requires of the Alphas in his territory.”
She crossed her arms and leaned back a little more in the swing. “He wants you to replace Frank.”
I nodded. She seemed aware of the politics surrounding the Ringgold Pack, but I explained anyway. “The Ringgold Pack was around eighty strong when Frank took it over seven years ago, but there are only eighteen left. The others have moved to other Packs. Randall feels the Chattanooga Pack is getting too big and losing the family feeling. He wants the people from the surrounding areas to move back to their home Packs, but he can’t ask them to do it when an asshole is in charge.”
“It’ll be a fight to the death, and if I’m seen as yours then they’ll probably kill me, too.”
I shook my head. “I’ve stayed away from all organized full moon runs since I bought the house five months ago. Next month I’ll ask to run with them to check out the Pack, and I’ll either challenge and fight Frank then, or we’ll set a date if he wants to put it off.”
“Who knows about this?”
“Randall and his top five, me, Aaron Drake, and now you.”
“You aren’t going to join the Pack and work through the hierarchy?”
I shook my head. Usually, this was the way to gain the respect of the Pack members, but with so few left, I’d manage okay joining as I killed their leader and took what was his.
She didn’t ask her next question, but I had a feeling it had to do with the possibility of her joining my Pack, if I took this one over. She wouldn’t join Randall’s Pack, or the one in Atlanta, because she felt they’d shut her out.
I hadn’t known her back then though. Would she join me? My wolf wanted this woman, but Alphas don’t have relationships with lone wolves. They can have one with a human, or occasionally another kind of shapeshifter, but if they partner with a wolf then it either has to be another Alpha, or someone in their Pack.
It was way too soon for that conversation, though, so I put the chair back where I found it as I told her, “Let’s get Flopsy’s cage secured to your approval, and then it’ll be time for me to secure you so you meet my approval.” Yes, I intended to get across the subtle hint she’s going to be somewhat of a pet to me. Not because she’s a wolf, but because it’s the kind of relationship I’m interested in.
And because my wolf could see the incredible strength in her. She’d shown so much fucking control during her first full moon, she blew me away.
My wolf wanted her by our side as we ruled the Ringgold Pack, and at our feet behind closed doors. Honestly? I’d argued with him at first because of the age difference, but I was no longer opposed to the idea.
Briana eyed what she could see of the cage in the back as we settled Flopsy in the front floorboard and made sure she was secure, but she didn’t comment.
I walked her to the back of the truck, leaned against the corner, and said, “Strip. You’ll be naked in my home the entire time, and you’ll do as you’re told, when you’re told, or there’ll be consequences. For the purposes of our two days together, you’ll view me as your Alpha. I’ll return you here in forty-eight hours, and twenty-four hours later I’ll return so we can talk as equals.”
I smelled her arousal as well as her conflict, and she looked at the ground a good dozen seconds before she pulled her shirt off and worked her belt buckle. I opened the door and ordered her to fold her clothes neatly as she took them off, and she did so without arguing.
I motioned her into the cage and her arousal blossomed as she leaned over the triangular block so her hips were in the air and her face near the base of the cage. I strapped her legs to the block with the elastic binding — this would hold her in place whether she was human or wolf, without hurting her.
If I started playing with her now I might miss a step, so I remained methodical as I moved to the front of the cage and strapped her wrists to the floor over her head. If she changed she’d have her front paws free, but her body and back legs would be held in place to keep her from slamming into the cell’s bars and possibly injuring herself.
Finally, I pulled the wide strap over her back, secured it, and explained how this position worked no matter what form she was in.
Finally, I could let myself enjoy the scent and sight of her strapped in and available, and I took a few secon
ds to do so. Damn, she was beautiful. If we’d already had sex, I’d have sunk my cock into her and given myself a little relief, but this wasn’t the time or place for our first time.
I’d lubed a medium sized butt plug earlier, and now I retrieved it from a side cabinet and held it to her asshole. “Relax and let it in, Briana.”
She gave a small whimper, but I smelled the spicy scent of her arousal as she complied, and my cock swelled even more at her reaction. Fuck, but she promised to be fun to play with.
She jerked and yelped when I inserted a single finger in her pussy, and I reluctantly pulled my finger out with a grin. “If you ever want me to stop, you say the word red. Begging me to stop won’t make me do so, telling me something hurts won’t make me ease up — but the single word red will make everything stop until we can figure out the problem and either fix it and continue, or stop completely.” I paused a second and asked, “Tell me the word you’ll use if you want everything to stop?”
“Red.”
“Good girl.”
I closed the cell, then the back doors, and walked around to get into the driver’s seat. A camera let me watch her from the side as I drove, and a mirror let me see her from the front.
Chapter 12
Briana
By the time he pulled into what I hoped was his driveway, I was so horny I thought I might go mad.
I only thought the MC had been able to take me out of myself and give me out-of-the-world experiences. Patrick treated me like cargo — precious cargo that must be kept safe, but still, he packed me in, plugged me, and then let my arousal go from boil to simmer and back again as I rode behind him.
When he finally parked and turned the engine off, he grabbed my bags and Flopsy’s cage — and left. I could clearly hear a door opening and closing as he went inside, and I was outside, alone, strapped into a cage.
My wolf surfaced and I wiggled my fingers to try to remind myself what it was like to be human, but my fear and uncertainty were too strong for me to find control. Finally, I remembered what Gonzo had told me about making deals with her and I pictured a huge steak dinner in my mind — right next to a whole chocolate cake.
Careful What You Ask For Page 7
