by Avery Kirk
“Aww… OK, Melia. That’s so nice. See you,” Dave said, waving.
Tom shook my hand again as I rushed past him.
After I got home, I was able to make all the recipes that I could remember my grampa liking. Perch with lemon, blueberry muffins, green beans with almonds, Waldorf salad and spoon rolls. Each recipe was easy to follow because my gramma typed them up on a typewriter. There were a few White-Out blobs. On the perch recipe, she’d written in pencil: Don’t flip too much or it won’t brown right. I remembered my gramma saying ‘the secret is really the butter.’
I smiled as I realized that the same foil under the gas burners had been there since she, herself, had last cooked. I guess that was proof that we made a little too much food in the microwave.
I washed each pan as soon as I was done using it. My grampa tried to help when he got home, but I wouldn’t allow it. I asked him to set the table with the orange mushroom plates that my gramma bought when I was little. In an effort to get me to eat my food, she had told me that fairies were probably hidden behind the mushrooms.
After dinner, I gave my grampa his present. I’d wrapped it in the comics section of the Sunday newspaper. My mom always did that with our gifts.
“I thought this dinner was my present!” he said, clearly surprised. “Honey, really. This is too much.”
“Open it. I’m excited,” I said.
He very carefully unwrapped the box and admired the picture on the cardboard sleeve, nodding the whole time. ‘Will ya look at that,’ he kept saying. I just watched him. He had an argyle sweater on that he usually wore for special occasions. It made me smile that he thought my dinner was a special occasion. His nose had been broken twice when he was in the service so it was almost cartoon-character large. He had his coffee cup next to him. He drank coffee all day every day. I smiled.
“Slide it off, check them out,” I said to him.
He gently slid the cardboard sleeve off and ran his hands over the smooth wooden case.
“Oak?” he said, looking at me.
I smiled. “Think so.”
He carefully unlatched the box and opened it up to reveal the router bits.
In a moment of terror, I realized that I should’ve opened the box because this was the shipment the blue Temecula shirt had come in. I was suddenly intensely afraid that he’d find a new message inside the router bits. I panicked since I couldn’t see inside, and my Grampa’s expression had changed. Oh God, what. What else could possibly be sent to me? I already had booked the damn trip. I was going. Please don’t bring my grampa into this. I couldn’t bear explaining the whole thing to him. He looked up at me, and I felt as though my heart had stopped.
“Carbide coated, my word. These are just beautiful, honey. Thank you,” he said, picking one up to examine it.
I smiled in a mechanical way and stood up abruptly to get a better look over the opened lid. I saw nothing in the box other than the router bits. I sighed deeply.
“You’re welcome.”
I ran my fingers across the pieces just to ensure that they were all there, and I wasn’t insane. I sat down again.
“I talked to Dave’s parents today. He’s somewhat better. Turns out he had dropped the tonneau cover in the water and jumped in to get it. He got caught up in it and the boat got away from ‘em. He thought enough to break off the bell when he knew he was in trouble. You know, try to ring it from the water for help.”
“That’s crazy. He jumped in for a boat cover?”
“Well, being responsible is very important to Dave. He wants to prove that he can do things like any adult.”
“I guess.”
Grampa started fidgeting with his fork on his plate. “I’m so proud of you, honey. I can’t get over what you did. I was just sick that I wasn’t there. Just sick.” He shook his head and looked down.
I kissed him on his head, his buzz cut tickling my face. “I’m OK, Grampa. You’re always here when I need you.”
“Thank you. Thank you for all of this. What a great gift—all of it. I want to take a minute and talk with you since I have you all to myself tonight,” he said as he re-closed the case with extra care.
“What about?” I said. I was still not fully relaxed.
“I don’t want you to get upset with me. I’m only bringing it up because I care. But I see some things in you that worry me a bit. Behaviors that worry me. I want to ask you to deal with some of them and I can help you if you need me to. I just want you to know that I think you are—well, I think you’re wonderful, and I’m very proud of you. You’ve had it rough the last few years, and well, I’d move mountains for you. I just want you to know that.”
“Thanks, Gramps,” I said in a whisper. “I’m sure things will get better after my trip.” I hoped those words were true.
My grampa looked at me, his head leaned to the side.
“What trip?” he asked.
Crap. I’d totally forgotten to tell him. How could I have forgotten?
“Oh. I can’t believe I didn’t mention it.” I shook my head.
I took my time to answer. Every spin I ran through in my mind wasn’t quite right. If I led with ‘Kevin broke up with his girlfriend’ then he might think I was going there for very different reasons. I couldn’t mention my crazy stuff because any rational person would conclude that I was insane if they hadn’t been there to see the stuff happening. I pictured him blocking the doors of the house to be sure I couldn’t leave if I went that route and decided to tell him about all the signs. The explanation just wasn’t going to be easy.
“I was—well—Kevin and I planned a trip to California—just for a long weekend. He broke up with Lanie so you don’t have to ask how she feels about it. But, it doesn’t change anything. We’re just going as friends. You know, to check stuff out. I’m sorry I didn’t mention it before. I don’t know where my head has been.”
My grampa was quiet for a couple of minutes. He sat jabbing at his dinner when I interrupted.
“Grampa, I’m not going to be doing anything wrong. Just checking stuff out. Just a quick trip.”
He nodded. “You’re twenty-four years old now. Not much I can do about it. I just wish you’d thought to tell me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“How long you been planning this?” he asked a little louder with a sincerely curious look on his face.
“Not long at all. About a week or so,” I said, feeling like a terrible person.
He nodded again. “Will you please leave me your itinerary?”
“For sure.” I was a little amused at how official he made it sound.
“Your gramma’s yellow suitcase is in the closet in the hall if you need it.”
“OK thank you.”
“I hear it’s real pretty there,” he said. “Should bring the camera.”
I nodded. “Yeah, I hear that too. I’m kind of excited.” I might have lied. I’m sure what I felt was anxiety, not excitement.
He stood up with his plate in his hand and kissed me on top of my head.
“Now then,” he said, looking at his watch, “How’s about a little Wheel of Fortune?”
“Deal,” I said.
Chapter 13: Loose Ends
It was Saturday. The trip was less than a week away. It was time to tell Murray. I wanted to be sure I told him before he and my grampa got to talking too much about it before I went. I didn’t want anyone trying to talk me out of anything. My mind was made up.
I had to meet with Murray to give him the keys to the Bloomfield house since he was seeing the contractor. The homeowner was weird about a lock box and insisted that the contractor manage just a few sets of keys. Stupid, if you ask me.
Murray pulled up in his truck, suspension squeaking. He wore a red plaid shirt and super-old baseball hat. He parked so that our driver’s windows were facing each other.
“Hey, thanks for meeting me.”
“No problem,” I said, handing him the key. “I wanted to talk to you for a minute
anyway.”
“Yeah? Whatcha got?” he said.
“I’m heading out for a long weekend. Kind of a mini-vacation,” I said, looking past my steering wheel at the people walking in and out of the nearby store. “I figure you’re set. I don’t think I’m messing you up. It’s this coming weekend, plus Friday and Monday. Be back late Monday night.”
“Who with?” he asked.
For a minute, I wished I had a normal employer. I’d heard somewhere that it was illegal to ask these types of questions when you were a real employer. I tossed around the idea of lying. But he knew my grampa too well, and I just didn’t feel like lying and I didn’t think I should have to.
“With Kevin,” I said the words hard in obvious irritation.
He shook his head for what seemed like a long time. “Mel. I just worry for you. That’s all. Is his girlfriend coming this time? Is this a weird thing?” he said, concern and hesitation all over his face.
Great. Now to explain this part. I rolled my eyes. I wanted to say ‘nope he’s single and so am I! Woo hoo!’ and drive off. I decided against it.
“Even though I think it’s not your concern, I will explain. He broke up with Lanie. I want you to understand something—just because he’s a man and available doesn’t make him an obvious choice. It’s just something different, and I’m not sure either of us wants to go there with it. Yes, I notice that he’s nice looking and I know we get along but this electric fence in my brain keeps him out of my list of potentials. He’s like a cousin.”
Murray had already been grinning. “Hey, now that you’re both single, I will drop it.”
I let out a kind of growl of frustration. Murray laughed.
“None of my business now! We’ll have some more work comin’ up when you get back. Just have to finish off the last two jobs before Thursday, if you would,” he said.
I nodded, still slightly frustrated.
“See you tomorrow, missy.”
He mocked me by pretending to move his hair off his shoulder over and over and said in a high voice, “Oh, this old thing? I would just looooove to go on vacation with you?” followed by a horrifying high-pitched giggle.
“Goodbye, Murray.”
I drove away, laughing.
I dropped my truck off at home and walked to see Harry.
When I entered his room, Harry’s bed was made, but he wasn’t there. His glasses were on the rolling tray and that made me worry. He always wore them. The man next to him was still there, sleeping. I sat in the pilled burgundy chair and waited.
After waiting for a while, I found a nurse to ask.
“I’m looking for Harry. Do you know where he is?”
“Oh, I think he’s just coming back. You can wait for him. He might be a little tired today though,” she said, smiling.
I was uncomfortable and edgy but felt like I should wait. So I walked back into the room and sat down. I stared at the sleeping man and rolled my eyes, feeling annoyed, so I looked out the window instead.
I watched the leaves blow around on the grass. Hardly anyone outside this time. The trees were just skeletons.
Harry was pushed into the room. He looked terrible. He had a hole in his neck.
“Harry?” I stood up.
“He’s all right,” the nurse said in a smooth voice. “He’s just recovering.”
“Recovering from what?”
She rolled Harry past me in a wheelchair and he rubbed my arm as he rolled by. To reassure me that he was OK, I guessed.
“I’ll get him situated, and then the two of you can talk.”
She helped Harry into bed. Set his marker board with the marker next to it on his rolling tray and rolled it next to him.
“He probably won’t be very good company today because he’s sleepy. But, you can stay for a little while and talk to him.” She handed Harry his glasses.
The nurse walked out, and Harry put his glasses on, smiling very briefly. It hit me like a bat to the face that I had never asked Harry why he was here. I never had. I felt dreadful. My head shook, thinking that I was the most selfish person in the world. I had only talked about myself every time I came.
Harry was making faces like crazy. Mostly he looked exhausted and older. He reached for his marker board. I stood up.
“Harry, I can go. I didn’t mean to— Did you need something? Can I get something for you?”
Harry shook his hand at me, palm facing me. He seemed to be letting me know that he was OK. He picked up his marker board and marker and rested them on his chest for a few seconds. Every movement seemed to exhaust him. He picked them up again and wrote, turning the marker board to me.
‘Throat cancer.’
I put my hand on my chest, horrified.
“Oh I’m sorry.”
‘Hey, I’m alive,’ he wrote with a smiley face.
I forced a smile back.
‘Trip?’
“Yeah, I told you I’d come to see you before I went. I had no idea you would be in pain.”
Harry smiled again.
‘Happy to see you,’ he wrote
“OK, well, I want to go so you can sleep, but I just wanted to come and tell you that I’m going. Kevin is going with me, and I know I probably sound clinically insane or whatever for going—but I’m going. I promise you that I will be careful. It will probably just be a vacation.”
I looked around the room awkwardly. I felt like running through a wall, I wanted to leave so much. I jammed my hands into my jeans pockets.
“Anyway, so I’m going to go. I have to pack and stuff. Maybe I’ll bring you back a shirt.” I smiled, knowing that I sounded lame. Harry looked troubled. He reached his arms out and moved his fingertips toward himself to show me that he wanted a hug.
I hugged him gently, avoiding his neck. When he let go, he grabbed my hands and held them for a minute.
“I’ll be fine, Harry. I’ll see you next week,” I said, reassuringly.
Chapter 14: California
On the plane, I was insanely anxious about our trip. Thankfully, we were on a direct flight and flew into San Diego. The drive to Temecula took about an hour, and though I had no idea where to go, I insisted on driving. We sat in the rental car, and I pulled out the map. I turned it all around looking at it closely, both front and back. Kevin was staring at me.
“What are you doing?” he finally said. “I can guide us to the hotel.”
“No, I know. I was looking for like—a message or something,” I said, feeling stupid.
“A message? What kind of message? The rental guy circled the hotel, see?” he said, pointing to the map where there was a big circle and an arrow.
“I meant like a message with further instructions. Because I haven’t had any more strange encounters. I half expected someone to pass me a note while we were walking in the airport,” I said, now entertained by myself.
Kevin laughed. “Would the note passer be wearing a trench coat and a fedora?”
“Probably,” I said, playing along.
“Knock it off. I feel like I might need to drive you to the nearest psychiatrist. Although, I do believe that if we spend any amount of time overanalyzing why we’re here, we might both need one,” he said, taking the map from me.
Then he put on his calming voice. “Let’s do this. Let’s just say we’re here to check out the local sights and this is a little vacation we planned. Just for sanity’s sake we’ll say that. If any SECRET MESSAGES…” He air-quoted with his fingers with great drama. “…come along then we’ll deal with that.” He laughed again.
“Deal. Tell me which way,” I said as I turned out of the parking lot. “And no more air quotes. Air quotes are forbidden on our trip.”
I was very grateful that Kevin was here with me. I doubted I’d be so even without him alongside. Kevin guided me to the hotel. On the way, he checked out the tourist pamphlets he’d grabbed from the rental car counter.
We went to the hotel, checked in and got a two queen suite. The room was nice
—comfy and clean. The textured walls were a yoga studio aqua, and the bedspreads were tastefully floral to match. Kevin threw himself on the bed and stared at me while I unzipped my suitcase. I heard the silence and looked at him.
“What?”
“How are you doing?” he asked.
“What do you mean?”
“I mean, are you doing OK? I’m worried about you a little,” he said, tapping his index finger on his lips.
“Yeah, I’m good,” I said with my best fake smile.
“Are you tired?”
“No. Nervous. Are you tired?” I asked.
“Not really. OK. First of all, don’t be nervous. We’re in California! We’re on a trip to Temecula’s wine country. If nothing else happens, we’ll have fun with that. I feel like maybe we should get you a wide-brimmed hat so we can look the part.” He put his hands up next to his head to show a gigantic hat with improved posture.
I laughed.
“We’re only here for a couple of days, and there’s bound to be a bunch of crap we can do. Don’t worry though. I think it’s really cool that you’re waiting to see how this plays out. Of course, I’m fine hanging with you. But if nothing comes up, then no big deal. OK?”
I smiled. I was so glad he was here.
“OK,” I said.
When he spoke, he looked at me intensely. It was as if he was very concerned with my well-being, even though I was the one who’d dragged him here.
He kept his severe look and said, “And I’m serious about the hat.”
We laughed.
For the next two days, we went sightseeing. The first day, I wouldn’t leave Temecula—just in case. So we saw a movie and walked around checking stuff out and appreciating the much warmer weather.
I was beating myself up in my head. I wondered what if I was missing why I was here. I jumped at every sound and felt easily the most on-edge I’ve ever been. I didn’t even consider that the whole thing might be a fluke; I wouldn’t let myself off the hook that easily.
On Saturday evening, doing a little more exploration, we went to Sunset Cliffs near San Diego. I’d never seen so many surfers. We walked over and stood on a flat part of the rocks, taking in the view. A couple was getting married on a nearby cliff. The view surrounding them was gorgeous. The sky was a deep orange toward the horizon that lessened the further it spread from the waterline, mingling with the blue sky and touching the clouds.
