I heard the sound of running feet as I left and turned to catch a missile. I wrapped my arms around her as she clung to me, crying and trying to apologize. There was a word and a sob, then a sniffle that repeated over and over. I walked back, carrying her to the bridge, and leaned over, releasing her into her seat at communications.
“We won’t be gone long, sweetie,” I told her. “Remember, this is the business we are in now, minus the emotions. This has been a long time coming, and there is so much blood on the books already — it’s all led to this moment. Do what Lorelei orders, unless it sounds stupid, then check with Binda or Nedra for what you should really do.”
“Benjamin!” Binda yelled.
“Get off my bridge!” Lorelei added.
Natalia smiled through the tears. “I’ll be sitting here watching for your message, Dad,” she said.
“Lorelei, if you can’t meet us, then sit tight or run towards Trillond if that’s what it takes for you all to remain safe. I will find you.”
I found Aisling on the way back. Her door was open and I stepped in. “I just said goodbye to the bridge,” I told her. “They have their instructions; Lorelei trusts you, so if they run into trouble, don’t hesitate to offer suggestions. I told them to run for Trillond if something happened and we would find you.”
Aisling pushed the door closed and pulled me into her arms. I didn’t want to hold her too tight for fear of hurting her. She leaned in, put her mouth to my ear, and bit my earlobe.
“Damn, that hurts!” I said.
“Making sure I have your attention,” she replied, her lips brushing the side of my face. “Kill that fucker and then kill him again to make sure he’s dead,” she said softly. Her hands came up to my face and she cupped my jaw while she kissed my lips. It didn’t matter that her lip was rough from a scab, it was still the kiss of an angel. That was Aisling; she wasn’t about to give me a kiss on the cheek. I didn’t think she ever had.
“Get some rest if it stays quiet and try to heal up. There is no telling what’s in store, even when this little adventure is over,” I said. I opened the door and walked out, pulling it shut behind me. This time there was a small crowd saying goodbye, now that everything was loaded up. Grubb, Buddy and Adam were shaking hands with my team. I saw their eyes go big and take a step back from me. I knew who was there.
She stood there working her jaws like she had something she wanted to say. She was a queen; it seemed they had opinions on everything, and she was no exception.
I’ll be on my way back in a few days. You think you can control yourself and be good? I asked her.
I will make no promises or owe any explanations, she said.
I stepped into her personal zone, though it wasn’t somewhere I often liked to be. I scratched between her eyes and stroked the fur. Watch over my daughter and everyone else. We are family, Imelda, and we take care of our own.
You leave me behind? I don’t understand.
You stay to protect what is most precious to me. You can do me no higher honor, do you hear me? If I fail, there will be repercussions. Enemies will seek them out and try to harm Natalia and our family. I don’t plan on failing, but sometimes the fates aren’t kind. I must go now; I’ll see you soon.
I was the last to board. I looked around the hold as the ramp closed until I could see no more.
Chapter 31
Shawna was in the pilot’s seat, with Blue Eyes riding in the second. There was tension in the air, and I knew to leave it alone unless it turned physical. It was never going to be easy for Blue Eyes if she stayed with my crew, so I hoped if she lived through this she would head out on her own. I was no shrink, so I didn’t understand how the compulsion in her head exactly worked. She had come after me, failed, and hadn’t shown any desire to try again. Plus, she had killed her master and fled, only wounding me.
I surmised they would be alright, and I found Taz a few feet away staring at me. The muscles in my face tightened. My brows hurt from frowning during the long exhale, and my teeth were starting to grind. She just didn’t get it.
“I’m glad I thought to come along,” she said. “Being the only person who didn’t get a goodbye, I can’t be upset or insulted, because I’m here.”
“Taz, I didn’t want you coming because of your position in the whole scheme of things, and I didn’t talk to you because we would have argued and fought about it,” I told her. “I knew you wouldn’t be reasonable or accept the explanation that I cared about what it could mean for you to be involved. Will you stay on the shuttle out of sight?”
“No!” she said flatly.
“You have no armor and will stand out as much as Harry,” I sighed. “I’m hoping to be . . . screw it. It’s useless trying to make a plan to carry out an op and have it go according to said plan with people like you around.”
“What do you mean, people like me?”
“You know, the kind that butt in, don’t listen, and don’t follow orders,” I said.
“You mean people like you! I know how to follow orders,” she said haughtily.
“No, you don’t. I said stay on the ship, and you said no. That’s not following orders.”
“I have armor, and I can tuck my hair in my shirt and wear the helmet. Natalia had me try on Bill’s armor, and it fits mostly. It’s tight and loose, but it will work.”
“You and my daughter will be the death of me,” I said. “I don’t need you two conspiring behind my back every time something comes up.”
“You most definitely need both of us and your crew to keep you focused.”
“I’m thinking when this is over and we are on our way out of this system we need to spend some time apart, see new people,” I told her quietly. “It will do us some good. You have a list of suitors probably as long as this shuttle just waiting for you to get home so you can do whatever it is you people do.”
“You are on dangerous footing, Benjamin Jamison. Do not speak of this again, or even think it,” Taz hissed like a spitting cobra.
I did my best to keep a straight face and kept right on talking. “You stay on the shuttle and I will consider your opinion on the subject, but otherwise I will follow my own counsel, and we will go our separate ways to see who else is out there for us.”
Everyone had the good sense to stay away from our conversation except for myself. I was enjoying the irritation I was causing her. Besides, it would always be a no-win situation, so I might as well irritate her. Her inserting herself in my life was what she lived for right now, and my only recourse was to get her home and head for the farthest point in a galaxy belonging to a species other than the Cjittan. I wasn’t even sure if that would work; maybe faking my death might do it.
I contemplated a number of options while looking at her irritated face. I did my best to ignore the easy, no-broken-bones option of just being with her. What’s not to like? And who knows where it could lead? I thought. Then again, she is a queen, and probably has a closet full of skeletons that I don’t want to know about. I just got the big reveal on my last lover, and in light of all that’s happened lately, that was just icing. I figured the smartest thing would be not daydreaming while I was in the process of pissing someone off. But I realized this a few seconds too late.
Slap! The hand connected with my face. I was back now, and it was like high school, waking up to a punch from a classmate in the middle of the teacher asking a question.
“Are you listening to what I am saying?” Taz hissed again, closer to me.
“Yeah, your word is law, and you seem to enjoy slapping me.”
“Not bad, right on both accounts, but wrong conversation,” she answered.
“Sorry, it won’t happen again,” I said. “Unless you start talking, of course. Then I’m not to blame; it’s a medical condition the male of our species is born with.”
“You lie. There is no such condition.”
“Oh yes, just ask Ronnie. It occurs when there are too many words bombarding the male. The max tolerance
level adjusts itself, and if the words are harsh and angry, our brain, in order to protect our minds, shuts down the signals from our ears. So you really shouldn’t talk so much, because I don’t hear it anyway.”
Taz looked at Ronnie for confirmation and I almost busted. I had been kidding. But Ronnie, bless her, nodded her agreement.
“I can’t say that theory has been proven,” Ronnie said. “But I have seen those very symptoms quite often, so it’s not just a myth.”
“When we get to Cjittan we will see if we can find a cure,” Taz said. “We have the very best scientists. We may need to alter your base molecular cell structure to correct this deficiency.”
“Oh no, you’re not,” I protested.
“But it will cure your disability,” Taz argued.
“It’s okay, Taz. They like being the way they are and there is nothing you can say that will change that,” Ronnie explained.
“Boss, why don’t you just be nice to her? Then she might just leave you alone,” Snake said. “It’s like reverse psych-ops. I had a third cousin who kept bothering me, you know what I mean, and one day when no one was home she came over. She was older than me by a few years, and I thought it would be cool, an older woman and all. I took her by the hand and we went into my brother’s room. It was like three minutes later, she hurried out and never bothered me again.”
“Three minutes, Snake, is that what you said?” I asked. “Not a great story, buddy. Keep that one to yourself, it’s not exactly reverse psych-ops.”
“Damn, Snake, really?” Genius said. “Your cousin? Three minutes?”
“I think it worked. She left me alone and wouldn’t even acknowledge me at family reunions,” Snake said.
I was so happy Snake had told his awful story; it was a good diversion. I sat down quietly and closed my eyes, Taz was engrossed in her thoughts trying to understand the conversation they were having with Snake. Harry had the same idea I had and sat with his eyes closed. It was a safe bet he didn’t understand anyway, and he was lucky he didn’t.
A little while later, the conversation had died off and we were all doing the same thing, just trying to rest. The shuttle was cloaked and making good time. Angel had proven herself useful and had given us a number of places to land near the coordinates Blue Eyes had provided.
I still wasn’t really sure if I could trust either of them, but if I needed their help to get to who I wanted to kill, then I didn’t care. I would handle whatever surprises they had in store for me.
“Everyone, get some sleep,” I said, loud enough for them all to hear. “Shawna, wake me up in four hours and I can sit up front while Mira takes the helm.”
Blue Eyes and Shawna both turned, looking through the open door at me. “You asked me for a name,” I said. “That is my choice. If you don’t like it, you are free to come up with your own, but this relieves me of my obligation.
“Mira,” she said. “I like it. Thank you, Benjamin.”
“No problem. It’s not exactly one of my strong points, but I thought it would be a good name, and easy to remember.”
“It is. You have been kind when you have no reason to be. You gave me clothes and a name and didn’t kill me,” Mira said.
“That’s all you can hope for, is a guy who won’t kill you,” Shawna said and laughed. “You’ve got a lot to learn, girly.”
“Maybe you should help her. She doesn’t have the life experiences of a grown woman, just the body,” I said.
“Why me?” Shawna said. “I’m betting we have to take her out when we get this party started. You should have gotten rid of her when you got rid of Matt and Bill. It will be a waste of time.”
“How about we see what happens, and if she comes through this and earns our trust, then you take her under your wing.”
“It’s not necessary, Benjamin, I have learned much from being around you and your crew,’ Mira said.
“Suit yourself, you’re probably better off,” I told her. “A lesson taught by a reluctant teacher only provides poor knowledge. Wake me up in four, Shawna, then get some sleep. You’ll need your wits about you when the time comes.”
zzz
“Permission to enter, Captain?” Aisling asked
“Permission granted, Captain,” Lorelei replied.
“You two aren’t going to keep calling each other that, are you?” Natalia said.
“Just this time, Natalia,” Aisling answered. “Your father has been a bad influence on all of us. There are courtesies and protocol that have been neglected of late, and I would like to return to them.”
Something about the statement didn’t sit right with Natalia. She felt angry at them for blaming Benjamin.
“Okay, well, wait ‘til you get back to your own ship,” she said crankily. “I don’t want to have to start remembering a bunch of crap because you two want to take a trip down memory lane and your military glory years.”
“Bad influence probably is too kind,” Aisling revised. “I remember when you were just a girl, scared but also excited about being on the Warhammer with all the crew. You didn’t seem to care about our protocol and courtesies when we were taking care of you.”
“How did you like being locked in that room after having your ass kicked, Captain Aisling?” Natalia yelled. “Were you hoping they would get it over with and give you a quick death? No, you weren’t, you were waiting and praying for my father, the bad influence, to come and save your ass. You love him and you knew he would come. You were the bait, that’s all you were. I didn’t have that luxury. I used to pray someone would save me, but they didn’t come. Then I prayed someone would kill me, but they didn’t do that either, did they Captain Lorelei? No, they used me and fed me enough to keep me alive. Then that fucking captain would use me again, and beat the shit out me.”
“Natalia, I’m sorry,” Aisling said, realizing the trigger.
“Stow it, Captain! You two can play at whatever shit you want to, but my father has nothing to do with my attitude or your ship. He gives people choices all the time, simple choices to stay or go. He loves his friends and never badmouths the hard-working crew members of your ship, or any ship. I watched him deal with two people he respected and called friends, who had been betraying us all along. Captain Lorelei, how about I lock your ass in the floor and you can listen to the click of the lock day after day as you lay on the ice cold steel floor. You didn’t even bother to tell them I was locked in the floor of the ship, did you? You were hoping I would die so no one would ever know what a piece of shit you are. Do you two think I have forgotten my past at the hands of an evil, twisted fucking captain? The next time you blame my father for the lack of control in your life, I’ll shoot you. How’s that for bad influence? And it didn’t come from Benjamin Jamison.”
Natalia was standing, trembling in anger. It had been pent up inside her for a long time. She had done her best to suppress it when it came to Lorelei, but as time went on and she spent time with the people her father surrounded himself with, she was losing the battle for control. This was the result.
“Natalia,” Aisling said patiently, “I wasn’t serious about Benjamin being a bad influence. It’s a joke, really, and it’s not like we can do anything about it. He has won us all over to his side, which isn’t exactly in line with the military way right now.”
“It’s a joke I’m tired of hearing,” Natalia said. “He has been through enough, and if you think his ways are bad, then stay away from him. Both of you owe him a lot, so talk about how you’re going to make sure you do your part getting them back safely.”
“Natalia, you can leave the bridge and you don’t need to come back. I have enough people to cover everything,” Lorelei ordered.
“Captain Lorelei, let me explain something to you that you might not know,” Natalia answered, suddenly calm. “I am my father’s heir. Anything happens to him, and the Claymore is mine. So don’t tell me what I can or can’t do.” Natalia walked slowly over and stood toe to toe with Lorelei. She looked her in
the eyes, and it wasn’t Natalia who looked away first. After a few more seconds, she walked out, ignoring Aisling.
The two women were at a loss for words. Natalia’s anger had cut deep to the bone. Lorelei hadn’t known Natalia harbored so much anger; she had never seen that in her before. She also couldn’t defend against it. The child, now a young woman, was righteous in her anger. Nothing she had said was a lie.
“If anything happens to Benjamin, you can come and live on the Warhammer,” Aisling said after a pause. “It may not be safe for you here.” She observed.
“Thank you,” Lorelei answered. “I hope I get the chance to prove myself to her. I’m not the same person I was then.”
“She worships him, calls him her father, and he has accepted her as his daughter because that’s who he is. Maybe she’s right, I don’t know,” Aisling said. “He plays judge, jury and executioner like it’s just a bad day at the office, then teaches his daughter how to fight and survive in exactly the same way. She said she would shoot us, and I think we had better take that seriously.”
“Aisling, if she shoots me, she is not to blame. Even Benjamin’s influence on her is not to blame, really. He is teaching her control over something she already had inside her. I think E’Aria leaving hurt her a lot, more than we noticed. She made it through Andrea’s death to have E’Aria leave and then her father kidnapped. I think something clicked over again to self-preservation.”
“You may be right, but being alive is a lot better than being right, so think about my offer,” Aisling said.
“What’s wrong?” Binda asked, walking in. “Why do you two look so shocked and serious?” Nedra walked in behind her, looking equally curious.
“It’s nothing,” Lorelei said. “I’m going to get some sleep, so please just wake me for the next shift.”
“We have other crew members who can take the watch, Captain,” Binda said, but before she could continue the offer, she was cut off.
The Chronicles of Benjamin Jamison: No More Lies (Book 3) Page 25
