by Lucy Ellis
She took a peek at him. His expression had relaxed and he touched the underside of her chin to have her meet his eyes. ‘What I said last night, Lulu, about it just being one night—I was too hasty. I want to see you again, hermosa…can you doubt it?’
Misery rose up to flood her as she realised he was saying the words any other woman would be thrilled by.
But that sense of incredible well-being this man had instilled in her was fast being swamped by panic.
‘I can’t,’ she choked.
‘Is there someone else?’ His eyes hardened, only to grow more probing as she shook her head.
‘You might have changed your mind,’ she said softly, averting her eyes, ‘but I haven’t. I was only looking for last night.’
‘Are you sure?’ His voice was coaxing, as soft as hers, but about a hundred times deeper and rendered incredibly sexy by his accent.
He didn’t believe her, she realised. Probably because any normal woman in her position would fling herself at him. The problem being she wasn’t normal…
‘I can’t,’ she said, stepping away from him. ‘Please don’t push, Alejandro.’
He just stood there, watching her, his arms by his side, clearly trying to work her out. Lulu wanted to tell him not to bother. It was really terribly simple—she was too much trouble. He just didn’t know that yet.
‘You know I will try to change your mind this weekend?’ he said, in that beautiful, coaxing voice she needed to block out.
Lulu wanted to stopper his mouth. He had to stop saying these wonderful, thrilling things to her. He had to be made to see she wasn’t worth the trouble.
‘No, don’t do that, Alejandro. Please. I don’t want you touching me or acting—acting in any way towards me that might be construed as intimate.’
It had come out all wrong, and she could feel her chest growing tight as a drum as he regarded her in newly tense silence.
‘My friends and family are going to be there and they’ll only ask questions,’ she finished, half under her breath, unable to meet his eyes.
Alejandro discovered he didn’t much like being put in the interesting position of being a woman’s dirty little secret. Although at least it would explain the stone lodged in his chest.
It was also a reminder to him that the moment you expected something better from a woman was the moment she let you down.
‘Please don’t be difficult about it,’ she said.
It was the bare shoulders, he decided, and the inky curls out of control above them, and her mouth, still swollen from kissing him. That was what was rubbing him up the wrong way.
As soon as they were back in the real world this feeling of possessiveness about her would loosen and fall away. There were plenty of beautiful women out there.
‘There is no difficulty, querida. I’m just surprised. You didn’t seem like that kind of girl.’
‘What kind of girl?’ she framed uneasily.
‘A woman who was looking for a one-night stand.’
A flash of real hurt glanced across her face, but she merely looked away and didn’t deny it, and Alejandro discovered that all his reasonableness in this situation was gone. He wanted to destroy something.
He’d slept with a lot of women as a younger man who just wanted to score a little fame and it hadn’t bothered him, because he hadn’t been in it for anything other than the sex.
But inexplicably the woman who came to mind was Valentina. He could still see his ex-wife—then his very current wife—clutching a sheet to her breasts while her lover, his erstwhile teammate, yanked on clothes so at least he would be dressed when Alejandro knocked him out cold.
In the end he hadn’t swung that punch. The guy had done him a favour—had destroyed whatever his parents’ crazy marriage had left of his faith in an old-fashioned till-death-do-us-part relationship.
When he’d asked Valentina why she’d married him as they’d signed the divorce papers she’d said simply, ‘You’re a ten-goal player.’
He looked at Lulu now—at her closed expression, her tightly held mouth.
Was that what this was about?
He remembered how she’d been on the plane: spoilt and demanding and exactly the kind of woman he avoided like the plague. He grimly reflected on the efforts he’d made in the past with Valentina, to satisfy her endless demands for a different life while holding together the livelihoods of everyone on the estancia. He’d wasted two years on a woman who was empty inside and had blamed him for it. He wasn’t wasting any time here.
He grabbed his bag and shoved a few things inside. ‘We need to get a move on,’ he repeated calmly.
Lulu watched Alejandro zip up his bag, utterly together, as if something very special hadn’t just been smashed at their feet.
She guessed he did things like this all the time, whereas she’d only done it once—now, with him—and it felt so strange and emotional and…knotty.
The problem was she couldn’t explain the circumstances of her request any more than she’d been able to explain why she hadn’t been able to give up her seat on the plane.
But she wanted to.
She opened her mouth to ask if he could think of another way, but what was the point? What was she going to ask of him? That he sneak into her room at night when no one would see? It was too ridiculous, and he’d just laugh at her or—worse—see her as odd and damaged. Better he think she could turn off her feelings like a tap, that last night had meant nothing to her. Because she had to let this go.
One day, when she was better, she’d be able to handle a relationship, but not now. She just wasn’t ready yet. Certainly not this weekend.
‘You might want to get dressed,’ he said.
His expression was cool, but she couldn’t blame him for it.
‘Our transport’s here.’
‘Transport?’
She followed his gaze out of the window. And she forgot about feeling about an inch high. She forgot about feeling in the wrong. Forgot everything but the need to hold herself upright by clinging onto the windowsill.
There was a stonking great black helicopter sitting on the hill.
*
Leaving the bed and breakfast, Alejandro peeled off a couple of large notes to cover the picture they’d knocked off the wall and the broken lamp.
Mrs Bailey gave them a knowing look. ‘Not married long, then?’ she said, and Lulu wanted to die.
If she’d been a normal sort of girl it would have been funny. This morning would have been the start of something wonderful—but it wasn’t.
Instead she felt all knotted up inside, and with a murmur of goodbye and thanks she hurried outside, insisting on carrying her own case.
Perhaps it was foolish to ask him what he’d said to Mrs Bailey, given the mood between them.
‘Why would she think we were married?’ she asked as he led the way across the gravel to dump their luggage in the car.
According to Alejandro, a staff member from the castle would be driving his car in for him. If she’d needed any indication beyond a helicopter that Alejandro occupied a different stratosphere from her, his casual expectation that employees would take care of things settled the issue.
He opened up the boot, grabbed her bag and dropped it in.
Lulu bit her lip to stop herself from mentioning the crystal…
‘I didn’t say anything, querida, if that’s your question. I think it must have been all the noise you were making.’
With that he flashed her a challenging look, locked up the car and led the way towards their behemoth transport.
It was a short and thankfully uneventful flight before Dunlosie Castle came into view.
The place Lulu had been so anxious to reach yesterday was now the last place she wanted to be. All she wanted to do was lick her wounds in private. But at the same time she was so frustrated with herself she could scream.
She gazed out over the view of the nineteenth-century castle built around the original twelfth-century
ruin on the shores of a loch, still smarting from his words.
He might be angry with her, but he didn’t have to make her feel self-conscious about making the wrong sounds during sex. She couldn’t help the sounds she made. Any more than she could help it that she was not going any further with him.
‘As far as wedding gifts go,’ he drawled, ‘it’s a jaw-dropper.’
She whipped her head around, because it was the first thing Alejandro had said to her since they’d boarded.
‘What wedding gift?’
‘Khaled gave Gigi the deeds to the castle last night.’
Lulu bit her lip and for an awful moment wondered if her best friend was going to up sticks and move here.
‘Want one?’
What? Lulu didn’t know how to answer that. Of course she didn’t. But it was impossible to read him, so she wasn’t sure if he was having a go at her again.
Well, he could believe what he liked. About her being jealous…about her wanting the things Gigi had. Even if she did.
She did.
She dragged her eyes off his hard expression.
Only they weren’t the things he thought mattered to her.
How on earth had they been as intimate as they had been last night and yet they still seemed to know nothing but superficialities about one another?
Because you want it that way, Lulu. It’s more comfortable for you.
She pushed that voice away. She couldn’t help her condition.
Isn’t it convenient, though, that it’s there? You don’t have to delve a little deeper and look at what’s really going on here.
Lulu tensed, and that horribly familiar twisted feeling started up in her belly. By the time they landed the feeling was getting worse by the second.
It wasn’t helped when, as they disembarked, Lulu’s attention was caught by the woman who was coming towards the helipad across the lawn. The one person she really didn’t want to see right now.
In her distress she almost lost her balance, but Alejandro had her and for a moment didn’t seem about to let her go.
She looked up in alarm.
He had to let her go!
All she could see was the uninhibited things they’d done together last night.
And he was about to meet her mother!
Félicienne would make a fuss, and then Alejandro would know the truth about her, and she just couldn’t bear that.
‘Take your hands off me,’ she hissed, and after a long look he let her go. She turned away from the expression on his face because it made her feel like a horrible person.
She wasn’t horrible—she was just having a very bad day.
Pulling herself together, Lulu took off across the lawn, her attention fixed on her mother, who had that frantic look on her face—as if her only daughter had been off trekking down the Amazon, not taking a short flight from Paris to Edinburgh and staying overnight in a nearby village.
She could imagine Alejandro behind her, looking big and rugged and exactly the kind of man her mother would shrink from. She really, really didn’t want them to meet, and the faster she moved the better chance she had of keeping her two worlds from colliding in the worst possible way.
Only she was shaking so hard she thought she was going to fall down.
She stumbled.
‘Lulu?’ Alejandro was at her elbow to steady her, but she pulled away as if he’d touched her inappropriately.
‘I told you to leave me alone!’ she cried, her distress making her shrill. ‘What don’t you understand about that? I don’t want you!’
Alejandro’s big body tensed but he let her go. ‘Fine,’ he said simply.
Which was when she finally lost control of her legs, wobbled and collapsed headlong in a heap in the grass.
CHAPTER TEN
‘SHE’S FAKING IT,’ Khaled said dismissively, pouring them both a couple of fingers of whisky.
Alejandro had been telling himself exactly the same thing, but hearing it coming from another man pulled an aggressive response out of him.
‘You didn’t see her,’ he said grimly. ‘Something’s wrong.’
Khaled gave him a long look. ‘Good trip, then?’
Alejandro knew he should put it aside. He didn’t want to discuss Lulu and it had nothing to do with her plea for discretion. He felt protective of her, and he didn’t do protective. It left you open to manipulation, and the last time that had happened he’d almost lost the estancia.
No, he was here to enjoy the weekend. To watch his good friend make official the relationship that had intrigued Paris since the cabaret Khaled had won in a card game had hit the headlines and a red-haired showgirl had come into his life.
Alejandro had been at that game. He might have won that hand. He might have met that showgirl. But the one who swam to mind had glossy black curls and big brown eyes and the sweetest raspberry-tipped breasts.
He rubbed at his temples. It wasn’t just Lulu’s body that was playing havoc with his thoughts.
No, what really bothered him was the way she had felt, flopped in his arms as he carried her inside. She’d behaved so erratically this morning…as if she’d been struggling with something he hadn’t been able to see and then it had seemed to overwhelm her.
When her mother had intervened he’d felt aggravatingly powerless, and for a man who made sure he called the shots it had been an unsettling position to be in. But what right did he have to interfere? Why in the hell would he want to?
Lulu had made herself very clear on the subject. Besides, he knew well enough what happened when you went riding to a woman’s rescue.
The tension in him deepened.
‘So why aren’t you down there, mopping her brow?’
Khaled appeared to be enjoying this, and Alejandro found himself wanting to hit something. Probably not a good idea if it was the groom, a day before the wedding.
‘Her mother appears to have it covered.’
‘Probably a good thing. Gigi wouldn’t be happy with you making a move on her friend.’
Alejandro straightened up. ‘Why’s that?’
‘Lulu’s special.’ Khaled sipped his whisky, looking at home in this draughty pile of stone.
‘Special?’ Alejandro discovered his pulse was beating hard in his ears.
‘Sheltered, wrapped in cotton wool by her parents, not much idea of the real world. I doubt she’s ever had a boyfriend.’
The glass he held dropped through his fingers and smashed on the stone.
Khaled raised an eyebrow. ‘That answers that question. Man, you’d better hope Gigi doesn’t find out.’
*
‘He scooped you up and carried you inside…it was so romantic,’ enthused Trixie. ‘It was like something out of Gone with the Wind—you know, when Rhett carries Scarlett up those stairs.’
‘To force himself on her,’ scoffed Susie. ‘Yes, really romantic.’
‘Rubbish—no one forced himself on Scarlett,’ Trixie shot back. ‘Remember the smile she had on her face the next morning?’
Lulu wanted to die. She didn’t remember Alejandro carrying her inside. She only knew where she was now, as her mother’s face swam into view, and then she heard Gigi making everyone clear the room.
Fortunately that meant only Gigi heard her mother begin to cross-examine her about taking her sedatives and why she’d thought she was capable of flying alone in the first place.
The urge to scream at her mother was strong, held back by Gigi’s eyes telegraphing rescue over Félicienne’s narrow shoulder, and then her suggestion that the older woman might organise some tea while she and Lulu talked.
Gigi had always been able to manage her mother.
‘You’ll feel better when you’ve had a cup of tea,’ Gigi said gently, for Félicienne’s benefit.
The moment the door closed Lulu struggled upright.
‘I’m sorry, Gigi. I’ll do better.’
‘What are you talking about?’ Gigi took her hands. ‘You’re doing fine
.’
‘I’m supposed to be making this the best weekend of your life, and so far all I’ve done is cause mayhem!’
‘Lu, tomorrow’s going to be perfect, whatever happens. It’s all good. Calm down.’
‘It’s your wedding day.’
‘We said “I do” in a registry office almost six months ago. This is the cherry on top. Nothing is going to ruin this wedding.’
Gigi looked and sounded so confident it was hard not to believe her. Responsibility for running the cabaret and her life with Khaled had given her a new maturity and calm Lulu could only envy.
It just made her feel more of a mess. It threw the events of this morning into relief and brought home to her just how badly she’d handled herself.
‘So what’s going on with Alejandro?’
‘Nothing.’ She swallowed.
‘He was pretty concerned, Lu, when you hit the grass.’
‘Was he?’ She hated the way her heart lifted. ‘We didn’t get on at all,’ she lied. ‘He made me change a car tyre.’
‘He what?’
‘The tyre that blew out on our car—I changed it.’
Gigi was grinning at her. ‘So you showed him your skills? Nice, Lu.’
Lulu thought of what else she’d shown him and she could feel all the colour in her body meeting in her cheeks.
She was aware of Gigi watching her closely.
‘So last night—?’
‘We stayed in a bed and breakfast just out of town,’ Lulu supplied, studying her sleeve.
‘And?’
‘It was surprisingly comfortable.’
‘Lulu, what happened last night?’
I seduced him.
‘Last night’s over now,’ she said briskly. ‘I want to talk about the wedding.’
‘Oh. My. God…’ Gigi breathed. ‘You slept with him.’
‘No.’ She bit her lip. ‘Maybe. A little bit.’
‘Lulu!’
‘Stop making such a big deal of it. I am over twenty-one.’
‘So what happens after this weekend? Are you together now?’ It was impossible to miss Gigi’s hopeful interest.
