by L.H. Cosway
He moved closer, his lips at my ear again, as I felt every muscle in his body go taut. His words were lethal. They held equal parts anger, triumph, and satisfaction when he whispered, “I fucking knew it.”
Nine
Subtly, he moved his hips, his hard-on lightly pushing against me as he let out the tiniest masculine grunt. He felt heavenly, and for a moment I forgot that even though I hadn’t breathed a word, my body had betrayed me.
The cat was very much out of the bag…or should I say, the fake lesbian was out of the closet.
“Oh, this is fabulous! Okay, both of you get up. I want some shots of you standing by the window. Oliver, you go behind Lexie. Put your arms around her and, I don’t know, nuzzle her ear or something.”
First of all, was he shitting me?
And second of all, I felt like I was having an out-of-body experience when I moved to get off King. Just before he let me go, he clutched my wrist, giving it a hard squeeze that said, This isn’t over.
I walked to the window, sensing him follow directly behind. I felt like a small animal being preyed upon by an expert hunter. He’d caught me out, and I was under no illusions that he was going to make this easy for me.
But still, he was my boss. He shouldn’t have been acting the way he was acting. Even though we weren’t in the workplace right now, I needed to remind him of that. A moment later King’s heat was on me again, this time as he wrapped his arms around me from behind. And oh, my God, in spite of everything, it felt so good to be held.
“You’re attracted to me,” he whispered with a touch of curiosity.
I huffed out a breath. “Can we talk about this later?”
“You’re not gay, are you? You know I value honesty, so why would you lie?”
I felt the tip of his nose against the back of my ear, nuzzling me just like Bradley had asked him to do. My breathing stuttered; my heart hammered. Wow. His hand moved to my belly, fingers just barely slipping under the hem of my vest. I had tingles everywhere.
“I wasn’t intentionally trying to be dishonest with you. It was supposed to be a joke, but then you thought I was serious, and it kind of got out of control. I didn’t know how to take it back.”
His hand moved a fraction further, his fingers digging hard into the soft part of my lower belly. “You take it back like this: I lied, King. In fact, not only am I not a lesbian, but I also think you’re hot.”
“C-cocky much?” My words came out weird and choppy.
He didn’t say anything, but I could tell he was grinning.
“Okay,” said Bradley. “Turn around, Lexie. Put your arms around Oliver’s neck and stare up at him. Make me believe you’re infatuated.”
Oh, jeez.
As I turned, my breasts brushed King’s torso, and I heard his breathing deepen. How on earth did professional models do this every day? Perhaps I was just more sexed up than the average person, because every single touch got my mind racing to dirty, forbidden places.
I reached up, slid my arms around his neck, and hooked my fingers together. My chest was flush with his, but this way I couldn’t quite tell if he still had an erection. Perhaps that was for the best.
“You really had me believing you for a while,” he said quietly.
“Are you mad?” I asked, desperate to know.
“A little bit. I thought we were friends.”
“We were. We are.”
“Then why lie?”
“Because I wanted to keep it that way.”
Understanding lit in King’s eyes, his expression softening as his mouth firmed. “I see.”
He went quiet then, and he didn’t say anything more for the rest of the shoot. The other models were called back from their break, and I was still needed for a few more group pictures. I swear I was sick to death of smiling and pretending to be “having fun with the girls” by the end of it. When Bradley called a wrap, I went to change back into my own clothes. As it happened, I wasn’t allowed to keep the ones I’d worn during the shoot.
Not like I was dying to squeeze myself back into that black number anyway.
Unable to spot King, I decided he must have gone home. I said goodbye to Bradley and the other girls, and was just leaving the building when I saw the Merc idling by the side of the road. I hitched my bag up on my shoulder, having every intention of continuing on to the tube, when the door swung open. King emerged, and before I knew it, his hand was on my elbow, steering me back towards the car.
“We need to talk,” he said, voice firm.
“Oh, right, yeah okay,” I mumbled, climbing inside, skin tingling where his hand cupped my elbow.
It was dark out already, and I was exhausted after spending the entire day in the studio. I think King must have seen me blinking my eyes to try to stay awake, because he murmured, “Come here.” His voice had grown soft, tender. And as he held his arm out, I couldn’t resist scooting over and resting my head on his shoulder. He stroked my arm as his driver started the engine and drove away from the studio.
“You’re exhausted,” said King, and my God, I’d never heard him sound like that before. I’d heard him strict. I’d heard him joking. I’d heard him business professional. But I’d never heard him bedroom-y. I really liked hearing him bedroom-y. It was almost like now that he knew I was into guys, some kind of wall had come down between us.
A long sigh escaped him before he said, “We’re in something of a predicament, love.”
I turned my face to look up at him. “We are?”
Reaching out, he stroked my cheek with the back of his hand. “Yes, my darling, because I very much want to fuck you.”
I inhaled sharply at his admission, but he continued talking before I could say anything.
“In fact, I find myself thinking about it a lot. But I don’t fuck my assistants. I’ve never wanted to. And the problem is, I value you far more as an employee and a friend than I ever will as a conquest.”
I grew slightly rigid as I listened to him speak, but couldn’t help sputtering a laugh. “A conquest?”
“Love and romance aren’t things that enter my mind very often. They’re too…time-consuming, and I have so little of that as it is. I enjoy the company of women in many different ways, but I don’t have space in my life for a real partner. It would hold me back.”
“Okay….”
“When you told me you were gay, I was admittedly disappointed. However, I was also relieved, because it meant nothing could happen between us. But now I find out that you’re not, and I begin to want things that I shouldn’t.” He paused to give me a smouldering look. “Touching you today, being close to you, has been more arousing than anything else I can remember. It’s a heady feeling to find someone you’re highly attuned to, is it not?”
All I could do was swallow and nod.
“And so,” he went on, “here lies our predicament. If I fuck you, I’m going to want to keep doing it, and I don’t have time to keep doing it. Christ, even coming here today was a massive chunk of time I’d normally spend working.” He stopped and ran his fingers through his hair. “I could lose the run of myself inside a woman like you, Alexis.” He paused before muttering under his breath, almost absently, “And I fear if I made you my queen, I could no longer be a king.”
I frowned at him, whispering, “There are lots of different ways to be a king, Oliver.” It was one of the few times I’d ever called him by his given name, and it added a tenderness to the moment I knew he hadn’t expected. The look he gave me told me that. But really, I felt a little sad for him. He was so focused on succeeding, on winning, that he would never have time for love. That was sad.
“That’s true, but my life, it’s, well, it’s always been a certain way, and I’m afraid this may be the only way I know how to succeed.”
I didn’t know what to say, so I said nothing. Our journey progressed, and we were only a couple of minutes away from my flat when King began talking again.
“You have an addicting presence, one I
don’t want to give up, so I propose we try our best not to touch. I think that touching, for us, is where temptation lies.”
I groaned and rolled away from him, covering my face with my hand. “What’s tempting is when you talk like that.”
Peering at him through my fingers, I saw him bite on his lip and cast me a considering glance. “Maybe just once….” He stopped himself, shaking away the thought. “No, that’s a bad idea.”
“Uh-huh,” I agreed with him stiffly.
This was the best-paying job I’d ever had, and was ever likely to get. I couldn’t go letting a fling with my boss mess it up for me. I mean, I’d spent half my life working for minimum wage in grotty pubs and bars. I knew a good thing when I had it, and I had no intention of letting it slip through my fingers. My dream was to one day own a home of my own, someplace nice, where there were low crime rates and no junkies hanging around every corner, waiting to jump you to pay for their next fix.
I knew all of this as fact. I knew it, and yet, there was no mistaking the disappointment in my gut to think we’d never explore the possibilities that lay between us.
“So, we have an understanding, then,” said King. “No touching.”
“Yep. Got ya.” I nodded, a weird awkwardness settling in. The car stopped, and I saw that we were right in front of my building. I got out silently, while King insisted on walking me up to my flat. I told him he didn’t have to, but he insisted. I don’t think he liked the look of the gang of teenagers hanging around by the entrance.
I wanted to tell him he was doing more harm than good, because once the locals saw me with a man like King, they’d think I had something worth stealing. I didn’t. Neither did Karla. That didn’t mean it wouldn’t be upsetting to come home and find our place broken into. My things held no monetary value, but they meant something to me.
When we reached my door, I slotted my key in the lock and turned back to King. He was staring at me with an intensity that caught me off guard, and my heart fluttered.
A moment passed.
I wetted my lips.
He saw.
I inhaled.
He clenched his jaw.
“I’ll see you on Monday, then,” he said with effort.
“Yes.” I nodded. “Monday. Right.”
His hand rose to my cheek in a soft, forlorn sort of caress. “Sleep well, Alexis.”
At long last he turned and went, and I felt every foot of distance like a cord was snapping between us. Opening the door, I heard Karla utter a quiet “fuck” and found her holding a hand to her forehead.
“Give your nosy flat mate some warning before opening the door next time,” she complained. She’d clearly been spying on us through the peephole and got clocked on the forehead in the process. I laughed, and she shot me a scowl.
“That man is beautiful, Lexie,” she sighed, as though it was a bad thing. I definitely knew where she was coming from. Beautiful bosses who wanted to be your friend were a very bad thing.
“Tell me everything that happened today,” she insisted, plopping down on the couch, looking cosy in her blue pyjamas. I smiled and went to join her.
“Okay, so first, I’m not sure if I want to murder Bradley or send him an early birthday gift.”
Karla giggled. “Oh, my God, this is going to be good. I can already tell.”
Had I mentioned how much I really, really loved this girl? Getting comfortable, I told her everything. And when I was done, she threw a blanket over me, because I’d already drifted off to sleep.
On Monday morning, King needed me to assist him with a small meeting in one of the conference rooms. It was with a client company whose shares he was supposed to value so that they could be sold on to investors. At least, that was the gist I got of it. I had a folder full of spreadsheets that Eleanor had prepared, so all I needed to do was hand them out, make tea and coffee, and take notes of what was discussed during the meeting.
Oh, and did I mention that King was being weird with me?
I couldn’t tell if it was because of our conversation driving home from the shoot, or something else. To be honest, I thought it might be a bit of both. He seemed preoccupied, and it couldn’t all have been because of me.
The clients hadn’t arrived yet, and King had just finished having a chat with Daniel James, who had dropped into the conference room for a minute, when I lightly touched my hand to his elbow. I know we’d made that no touching rule, but I felt compelled to do it anyway.
“You okay, boss?” I asked softly.
His posture showed that he was definitely wound tight, and all the air seemed to rush right out of him. “Alexis,” he said, and turned his body to face mine. His usually bright eyes seemed tired, and he looked like he hadn’t gotten a wink of sleep. He spoke low, like he didn’t want anyone else to hear. “My mother had a bad episode last night. She…I had to take her to the hospital.”
Shocked by the admission, I gave his elbow a squeeze. “Oh, my God, is she all right?”
“She’s stable now.”
I wanted to ask him what had happened, but a moment later the clients arrived. King went to greet them, and I busied myself with the documents. It was a minute or two before I recognized one of them. Her name was Mila Rhodes, and I’d seen her before in a picture at King’s apartment. She was his ex-girlfriend, the one he broke up with because she wanted more than he could give.
Well, this was interesting.
I wondered if they’d met through doing business together. King didn’t seem at all affected by her presence. In fact, he still seemed preoccupied, probably over worry for his mum. He shook Mila’s hand and said hello to her just like he did the three men she’d arrived with. After the pleasantries were over, we all sat and got down to business. I sat on one side of King, my work laptop open in front of me to type down notes. The entire thing would have been a complete snoozefest if it weren’t for the underlying tension emanating from both Mila and her colleague, a middle-aged man named Vincent Jones.
I was good at reading people. Put it down to my years of bar work, watching how others interacted in social settings. And it was clear that something was going on between Mila and Vincent. I saw him touch her hand at one point during the meeting, but she’d very subtly pushed his fingers away, glancing surreptitiously at King, who was entirely oblivious to the exchange. Not me, though. I’d caught all of it, and surmised that Mila was having a relationship with Vincent that she didn’t want King to be aware of. Perhaps she was holding out hope he’d change his mind about settling down and come back to her. She didn’t want him to know about Vincent, that was for sure.
My seat was right next to King’s, and my laptop was open as I took the minutes for the meeting. At one point King leaned over to glance at my screen, his shoulder brushing mine as he shook his head. He wanted to correct something I’d written, but instead of telling me to do it, he reached over and did it himself. Practically leaning over me, he deleted a section of my notes before correcting them. I had no idea what to do with my hands as he typed, and felt a hot blush mark my cheeks at his familiarity and closeness. His cologne smelled gorgeous.
Even though Vincent had been talking the whole time, his voice filling the room, Mila hadn’t failed to notice. I saw her brows narrow in suspicion, and she cast me a considering look. And yes, just as before, King was entirely oblivious to it all, his mind focused completely on work.
The whole thing just made me feel awkward.
I didn’t know how to deal with posh people drama. If something like this were to happen at home, for instance, if one woman was jealous of another, it’d be handbags at dawn, earrings out, and a hair-pulling session. But here, in this professional environment inhabited by the wealthy and privileged, it was all narrow-eyed looks, passive-aggressive comments, and repressed anger.
I was practically bursting with the need to simply shout, There’s nothing going on! Because that’s what I’d do in any other setting, but not here. Here my employment was at stake. So
on the meeting drew to a close, and I excused myself to go use the bathroom. I’d just left the stall and was washing my hands when the door swung open and Mila Rhodes strode in.
Oh, for fu….
“Hello, Alexis,” she said, coming and setting her handbag by the sink. I nodded hello to her and turned off the tap as she pulled out a tube of lip gloss and began smearing it across her heart-shaped mouth. She was a petite little thing, at least a few inches shorter than me, and extremely pretty. She had one of those doll faces that always looked young, no matter the person’s age.
I had just turned to leave when Mila asked blatantly, “Are you fucking him?”
Well. Maybe these posh types didn’t beat around the bush after all.
I turned back around. “Excuse me?”
“Don’t play coy. I’ve never seen him so comfortable with an assistant.”
Any morsel of politeness I had in me swiftly fled as I gave her a sardonic look. “Ah, well, that means we must be banging, then.”
“So you are sleeping together?”
“Oh, my God, that was sarcasm. But if you need me to spell it out for you, here it is: No, we’re not sleeping together.”
She snorted like she didn’t believe me, but I saw a flicker of pain in her eyes that told a thousand words.
“You still love him, don’t you?”
Her face hardened as she swallowed what appeared to be a lump in her throat. God, I was right. Sometimes I hated it when I was right. Gentling my voice, I took a step forward and placed a hand on her shoulder.
“Take it from someone who’s been in many hopeless relationships. Move on. If he can’t see what’s good for him, then he’s not worth it. Find someone who is.” I paused, and Mila stared up at me, as though my kindness was the last thing she’d expected. “Vincent seems nice.”
