by Trudi Jaye
“Come in,” called Kara, maintaining her position in front of Rilla. “We’re in here. I have her.”
A tall man in the local sheriff’s uniform came cautiously into the hall, his handgun held ready in two hands. When he saw the two women, he stopped and heaved a sigh, putting his gun back in its holster. “Kara, what are you doing?” he said, exasperation in his tone. “Put that gun down.”
Kara glared at the deputy sheriff. “She’s inside my home, stealing from me, and you tell me off? Don’t you think you might want to thank me for doing your job for you?”
“Kara, put the gun down. Rilla won’t run, will you?”
Rilla shook her head, relief flooding through her body. Deputy Sheriff Matt Fordham was an old friend. He’d helped her father on a few occasions, keeping trouble in check and making sure the Carnival ran smoothly each year as it passed through the county. He’d come to the Carnival as their guest several times, and Rilla had even cooked dinner for him once. Her father had believed in charming the local law enforcement.
What was interesting was the atmosphere between Kara and the deputy. As soon as he entered the house, electricity sparked between them, making them both irritable and uncertain.
“You’ve arrested her before? I knew it!” Kara’s voice was full of triumph.
“No, I’ve never been arrested, Kara. I’m not a thief.” Rilla kept her eyes on the barrel of the gun, but Deputy Fordham’s arrival had taken away her fear of being shot. Now she just had to get out of being arrested.
“Rilla’s father runs the Carnival, Kara. Or did,” said Fordham, flicking an apologetic glance toward Rilla.
“Did?”
Rilla answered. “He died in a car crash a few weeks ago.” Pain flared, burned its way down into her stomach, and then settled heavily.
Kara nodded. “I’m sorry.” She looked at Deputy Fordham. “But it still doesn’t explain what she’s doing in my house. I want you to arrest her.”
He moved forward. “Kara, you need to put that gun down. You can’t just go waving it around like that.” He put his hand out toward her. “When I taught you how to use it, I didn’t mean for you to pull it out all the time.”
“One of us needs to have their gun out. I found her in my home, Matt. She broke in. Do you understand?” Kara’s voice was rising again and her hands were shaking.
“Kara, that’s fine. I’ll take her down to the station. I’m just saying I know her, and I know where to find her if she runs.” He paused to look at Rilla. “I’ll be sure to throw the book at her.”
“I’m so sorry, Deputy Fordham,” said Rilla. “It’s not as bad as it looks.”
“Just keep quiet and turn around.” He nudged Rilla around and put cuffs on her wrists. They scraped where they touched her bone, but Rilla didn’t care. The deputy was a much safer bet than Kara.
Matt turned to Kara. “If I take her to the station, Kara, you have to promise me you’ll lock that gun away where it belongs. It’s not safe.”
Kara scowled at him for a moment, holding the gun loosely in one hand. “What else should I have met a burglar with? A fluffy toy?”
“Someone could get hurt. That’s all I’m saying. And I don’t want it to be you.” He put one hand on her arm.
Kara twitched but didn’t pull away.
“Call me tomorrow.” She glared at Rilla. “Tell me what you get out of her.”
“I’ll do better than that. I’ll come ‘round to see you, to make sure you’re okay.” He hustled Rilla out the door and into the back of his car before climbing in and starting the engine.
“Look, I can explain—”
“This’ll be good. Just tell me this: were you planning to take anything or hurt Kara?”
“No, I swear.” Rilla shook her head in his rearview mirror.
“Then I’m going to put this down as something crazy that you did after your dad died. For Abacus’s sake, I’m going to take you to the station, write up an incident report to keep Kara happy, and then I’m going to take you home. After that, we’re not going to talk about this ever again. But you have to promise me you’re not going to do anything like this again either, okay?”
Rilla nodded, tears tight in her throat. Just when she thought she had a handle on her grief, someone did something nice and it all came crashing down.
“Come on, now, don’t cry. Your father was one hell of a guy, but he hated tears.”
Rilla smiled and released a small laugh. He was right. “Thanks, Deputy, I appreciate it.” She looked around the sheriff’s car, thinking about the glance she’d observed between Kara and the deputy. “How long have you known Kara?” she asked.
***
“You’ve ruined it! The Gift has been broken, and you’re the one who did it. You’ve stepped in the way of a Gift.” Blago paced at the front of the food hall. His hair flew in all directions and he had a glazed look in his eyes.
The others from the Nine were gathered around them, silently watching as Blago berated Rilla.
Rilla gave an exasperated sigh. “The Gift isn’t broken, Blago. I was simply gathering information to help us finish it.”
“You know the result of this night? Tomorrow, you’ll be gone. You’ll wake up in a field somewhere with nothing, and you won’t know what’s happened. You can’t stop the Gift.” Blago’s rant was gathering momentum and heading for hysterical. Jack moved to stand beside him, laying a hand on his arm. Blago took a deep breath, the whites of his eyes showing as he looked at his son.
“I wasn’t trying to stop the Gift. I just thought we needed to know more about the Mark.” Rilla looked around at the others in the room. Tami’s eyes were wide, watching the scene with a fearful expression. Christoph was impassive, his big arms crossed over his massive chest. Viktor just seemed annoyed.
Jack broke in. “You got arrested, Rilla. You can’t get arrested. You’re the face of the Carnival.” He glanced around at the members of the Nine. “For now, at least.”
Rilla suffered a blaze of anger. For now? She managed to keep calm as she answered him, but she looked at the others from the Nine, trying to convince them, not Jack. “He didn’t arrest me, not properly. He wrote up a report and let me go. He knows me, which is why he brought me home.”
“The local deputy sheriff drove you home, and you don’t think you’re in trouble?” Jack snorted.
“I’m not. At least not with Deputy Fordham. He was a friend of my father’s.” Rilla crossed her arms over her chest. She refused to be bulldozed. “I’m not a child you can tell off. I did what I had to do. And it was the right thing.”
“You were taken off the Gift. We’re handling it.” Jack frowned at her before glancing back at his father.
“You’re not doing it right. With what I learned tonight, I know that for certain. We need to figure out what else we can do for her, or the Gift is going to fail, and the Carnival will no longer exist.”
Blago dragged his hand through his hair. “If the Gift fails, it will be because of you, Amaryllis Jolly. You better go pack your bags. You’re going to wake up tomorrow and not know where you are.” He stalked back and forth in front of her, flicking agitated glances around the room and rubbing his arm.
A chill went down Rilla’s spine. Was he right? Would she be kicked out the same way he was all those years ago? Perhaps he’d only been trying to help, as well. She felt sick and took a deep breath to calm herself down.
She’d been so sure she was doing the right thing.
Glancing around at the familiar surroundings, Rilla scowled and set her mouth in a firm line. Her stomach settled. “No. You’re letting your own mistakes blur your judgment, Blago. I didn’t go against the Gift. I was moving it forward. If anything, what you’re doing right now is going against the Gift. It might be you who wakes up somewhere else tomorrow… again.”
There was a terrible silence as the words hung on the air. Rilla bit her lip, wishing she could take them back. She watched Jack, but he was focused on his father.
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Blago staggered, breaking his stride.
He stared at Rilla, his face pale. Reaching up his hand, he clutched at his right arm. “Jack—” he said, then slumped forward. Jack only just managed to catch his suddenly limp father and scrambled to get him to the ground without falling.
Viktor and Christoph both leaped forward, and the three men crouched around Blago.
“Jack—” Blago tried to say again, but Jack hushed him.
“It’s okay, Dad. You’re okay.” He turned to the group. “Someone call an ambulance. Now!”
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
The hospital was white and sterile. As it should be, she supposed.
Rilla hated it.
It reminded her too much of when she was little. After the birth of her younger brother, they’d spent a lot of time in hospitals. For a long time, she’d blamed the hospital for her mother and brother leaving the Carnival. She hadn’t realized how sick her brother had been or that they’d needed to stay in one place for his treatment.
The remembered sadness seemed to echo along the walls as she strode down the corridor.
She carried two steaming mugs of coffee. Hot, black, and sweet, just how Jack had asked for it. She saw the doorway ahead and slowed, stealing herself to reenter the room. When Joey had badgered her into driving him to the hospital, she’d reluctantly agreed. Everyone else had visited, and she knew she couldn’t avoid it forever. Joey was still there, sitting with Jack and an unconscious Blago.
She took a breath and walked into the room. Blago was in the bed, his face horribly pale against the stark-white sheets. Only the beeping machines gave any indication he was still alive. Jack held his hand, and Rilla tried to swallow down the lump in her chest. She’d never meant for this to happen.
When they’d first arrived, Jack had been polite, almost not even noticing she was there. He’d talked reassuringly to Joey and smiled when he was supposed to. But there was something wrong, something wild in his eyes that didn’t match his bland exterior.
She had decided to stay, to keep an eye on him.
The only problem was after half an hour of awkward silence, she needed to escape. She really wasn’t any good at dealing with hospitals or the emotions they elicited in people. Even more so when she was the reason Jack’s father was lying there. So she’d offered coffee.
Rilla nodded at Joey, who’d taken up position in one corner, and then turned to Jack. He didn’t look her in the eyes, just nodded as he accepted the coffee she handed him.
Without a word, she went to lean against the window, her back to the sunlight outside. She felt like a fraud but couldn’t quite bring herself to leave. Jack’s face held a vulnerability that hadn’t been there before, and it kept her in place, waiting with him.
“He hasn’t moved. Not once in the last hour.” Jack’s voice was soft.
“Have you—” Rilla cleared her throat around the sudden tightness. “Have you called your family? Are they coming?”
“There’s just my little sister. She’s in Europe. I haven’t been able to get in touch with her yet.”
“Maybe you should take a break. Get out of this room and go for a walk to stretch your legs. I can look after things here. If anything happens, I’ll send Joey to find you.”
Jack looked up, his eyes focusing on her for the first time. Something flashed in them, then was gone. He nodded. “Thank you, that would be good.” He stood, placing his father’s hand on the soft, white sheet.
Rilla moved to sit in his place. She hesitated then reached out to hold Blago’s hand. It twitched, and she glanced up, startled. Blago’s face was pale and still. Glancing at Jack as he walked toward the door, she opened her mouth to speak.
But Jack’s face was so worn she couldn’t bring herself to give him false hope. It was probably nothing. He’d been in this room for almost two days and needed a break from his bedside vigil. She kept quiet and watched as he walked out of the room, rubbing his hand over his face, his shoulders hunched.
Fifteen minutes later, there was another twitch. She watched Blago’s face and saw his eyes flutter open. He squeezed her hand again and smiled blearily. “Hey, girl.”
Rilla’s heart hammered in her chest. “Hey, Blago. How do you feel?”
“Like shit.” He cleared his throat then turned his face to one side, toward the bedside table. “Water.”
Rilla followed his gaze and saw a water cup with a straw on the table. She grabbed it and held the cup under Blago’s chin, placing the straw in his mouth. He sipped greedily for a few moments then leaned back, closing his eyes with a sigh.
“Can I get you anything else?” she asked.
“Nope.” He opened his eyes again, glancing around the room, seeing Joey by the window, then coming back to her. “Thought you got rid of me, eh, Rilla?”
“Blago, I never meant—”
“Oh, hush, girl. I was just fooling.” His voice was weak, and he stopped to take a deep breath.
“How do you feel? I’ll call for the doctor.”
“No, don’t. They’ll just tell me things I don’t want to hear.” Blago looked around the room. “Where’s that boy of mine?”
“He’s gone for a walk. He’s been at your side the whole time. I convinced him to take a walk.” Rilla found herself babbling.
“Hey, Joey.” Blago nodded in Joey’s direction.
Joey moved forward, his face full of smiles. “Blago. It’s good to see you awake. You scared us.”
Rilla moved back and let Joey sit next to Blago. The boy chatted softly to him, telling him about the performances, inconsequential things that seemed to ease the older man.
“I’ll go find Jack.”
Blago glanced up at her and nodded. He was still pale and his head was firmly on the pillow, but at least he was awake.
Walking quickly down the hall, Rilla searched for Jack’s tall, dark head. She followed her nose back to the cafe, but he wasn’t there. She was just about to give up when she checked down a side hallway and saw him disappearing into the stairwell.
Pushing on the heavy steel door, she peered through the gap. Jack was crouched down, leaning his back against the wall, his eyes focused on some internal view. His expression was bleak. He didn’t see her at first, and she glimpsed the raw emotion on his face. He looked like he hadn’t slept in months, and his hands were threaded through his hair, pulling at the short ends.
“Jack,” whispered Rilla.
He jumped. Bloodshot eyes lifted and stared at her uncomprehendingly for a second. “Dad? Is he—?”
“He woke up. Joey’s keeping him occupied, but he wants to see you.”
Jack rocketed upward and practically shoved Rilla out of the way in his haste to get back to his father.
“Jack. Wait.”
He stopped, turning to look at her impatiently. “I have to go, Rilla. I have to see him.”
“Just… I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt him.” He opened his mouth to say something, but Rilla held up her hand. “And remember to take care of him. You don’t know how long you have with your family. They… they can just be gone one day, and that’s it. You never see them again. Remember to take care of him while you have him. That’s all.” A lump formed in her throat, and she swallowed hard.
He nodded. “I have to go. He’s waiting.” He turned and walked away.
Rilla stayed where she was, watching his tall frame stride along the corridor.
***
Jack looked at his father in confusion. “Dad, that’s ridiculous.”
“I’m serious, Jack.”
“I can’t be Ringmaster. I don’t know how to run the Carnival.”
“You don’t have to run it. You just have to be the one they look up to.”
“They don’t know me. I’m an outsider. They’ll never accept me.”
“They don’t have to accept you. The Carnival does. I don’t know why I didn’t think of this earlier.” Blago lay back against the white pillow and fla
shed a smug smile.
“I’m not going to do it.”
“Son, it’s not about how much you know. It’s about being the one who holds it all together. That’s what that little slip of a girl doesn’t get. She can’t hold them together. She’s not got it in her.”
“Rilla’s plenty strong, Dad.” A vision of Rilla flashed into his head. “You’re underestimating her.”
Blago shook his head. “She fights the wrong battles, and she’s heading in the wrong direction on this Gift. She came home in a police car, for crying out loud. How is that good for the Carnival?”
“Okay, so maybe Rilla isn’t doing a perfect job at the moment. But how am I the better option? I have no experience and no knowledge of how to run things in a Carnival where they’re suspicious of outsiders!”
“You just have to prove you’re a better option than Rilla. And with me backing you, that won’t be hard.” Blago smiled at Jack, his face lit with renewed enthusiasm.
Jack felt panic rising in his chest. He didn’t want to be Ringmaster. But he didn’t know if he could keep saying no to his father when he was so clearly relying on him to do what he wanted. “You need to be resting. You’ve just had a second heart attack. You don’t have time to show me what to do,” he said desperately.
Blago shifted restlessly in his bed. “As soon as they let me out of here, I’ll be fine. This is all just an overreaction. I feel great.” He moved about in the bed then winced. “Mostly great.”
“How long had you been experiencing symptoms, Dad?”
Blago waved his hand. “I didn’t know what it was. Just thought I was getting a bit tired, and my arm hurt.”
“The doctor was very firm about you having to take it easy. You can’t go running around the Carnival anymore. It’s time for us to go home.”
A light flickered in Blago’s eyes. “Son, we have to stay. I can’t go back to that house.”
That was the look Jack had been dreading. But he tried again. “Dad, this was never permanent,” he said, patting his father’s hand. “I have a life to live. Work to do.” He said the words, but he already knew he’d lost the battle. He thought back to what Rilla had said to him. Take care of your father.
