Besides, he got paid to be nosy. It was hard to just shut it off.
“Yeah. Well … it’s a bit blatant. Yeah, I’m not surprised. On the job?”
Thoughts clicked through Slate’s mind like beads on an abacus, calculating potentials.
“Yeah, I know as soon as Randy picks the date … he did? Crap, Lorne must be … yeah. Look, let me think about it.
The last idea slid into place and a pattern formed. Slate’s expression remained neutral.
“OK, Clairice, talk to you later. Hug the big guy for me.”
“Clairice, I assume?” Slate asked conversationally, folding the paper up carefully.
“Yeah.” Garnet hung up the phone, then busied herself around the kitchen, a meal taking shape with lighting speed. “We’re worried about Lorne.”
“So I gathered.” Slate watched his lover dart around the kitchen, a sort of domestic tornado, checking a casserole here, making a salad there. He held back a bit of annoyance - he considered Lorne a friend, one of the few he’d made since coming to Metris, and he’d hoped any problems would be shared with him.
“Well, HuanJen and your sister have gotten … cute. I mean at random, pure attacks of cuddling and everything but pet names. Even on the job, I hear.”
Slate’s mind drifted into the rather strange area of Jade being affectionate and sugary, unfamiliar intellectual territory. His sister was family, and as much as he’d tried to stick by her, there was a distant, unreachable part of her - a part HuanJen seemed to have reached. He could rationally conceive of her acting … well in a manner unlike herself, but he couldn’t feel it emotionally.
He reflected that, perhaps, that was a good thing. His sister was too often a source of confusion to him.
“I see. Go on.”
“Well, ” Garnet carefully set the table, “I think its wearing on Lorne, especially with Randy’s wedding coming up, he’s kinda … lonely. I mean face it, the guy’s social life has been a mess. That and if they’re doing this on the job - I know Huan is very careful about how he acts on the job, he knows people rely on him. He wouldn’t want to do something inappropriate.”
“Yes. I suppose a ‘kiss me you hunk of sorcerer’ would go over bad in front of someone who just had a delivery of herbal potions. I … you’re going to try and do something, aren’t you?”
Garnet stopped her preparations. “Well … its really annoying and its not professional, its definitely not HuanJen.”
“This has nothing to do with my … schedule?” Slate asked affectionately, but pointedly. “No jealousy? I know Jade got you that book for Christmas …”
“Well … they get to spend more time together than us. OK. Maybe a bit, but overall … they’re new to this and quite frankly they don’t know how nauseating they are. Was she ever like this?”
“Never,” Slate answered curtly. “Not with Cerullian, not with anyone. Usually she seemed, well, at best in control, at worst, distant. So, what are you going to do? I know I can’t stop you, love, so just tell me so I am prepared.”
Garnet rocked back and forth on her heels. “Clarice and I, probably, we’ll talk to them. What are friends for?”
“I suppose HuanJen and Jade will find themselves asking the same question eventually …”
“What?”
“Nothing, dear.”
January 8, 2000, Xaian Standard Calendar
PLAN A: Talk to HuanJen
Clothes shopping on Metris was an unusual experience for those used to worlds of large chain stores and wide selections. Mass manufacturing of items one couldn’t be sure would sell was not an option considering the relatively small population of Xai. Shopping was thus a matter of looking for used clothes, hoping that what was made or imported was in ones size, or finding a tailor.
In the case of HuanJen, a six-foot-two man with a thin build and no fashion sense of any kind whatsoever, it was the kind of challenge he needed help with. The magician priest stood outside “Men’s Unlimited Clothing” on Stitch Street, looking very out of place.
“I appreciate this, Garnet.” HuanJen smiled at his vulpine companion. “Originally the Guild didn’t say there would be concern over clothing. Then Guild Medical …”
“I know.” Garnet patted her friend’s arm reassuringly, crimson-furred face splitting in a calming smile. “Let’s get you a suit. Don’t worry, I got Slate stately, I’ll get you taken care of too.”
Inside, Garnet carefully maneuvered her friend to the right areas and the right people. MUC was a strange place for the uninitiated, a mixture of stock clothes, some used, and tailors anxious to empty ones pockets of Guilders. It was the kind of place HuanJen would, on his own, likely find what he was looking for - in the space of a few hours.
Garnet figured she could have him done in a half hour - forty-five minutes after making subtle comments about his diabetes-aggravating relationship with Jade. Having an excuse to talk to HuanJen in a seemingly innocuous situation had been a godssend - he had moments of naivet��, but they were separated by long spans of a kind of annoyingly precise comprehension you could mistake for naivet�� until it was too late.
Besides, putting things over on him directly made her feel bad. Her relationship with the magician-priest had been complicated, even after meeting Slate, but not without affection. Still, she reminded herself as thety walked thrugh the aisles, it was for his own good - and everyone elses.
“Well, I think we can do something for you … black. You wear black most of the time” Garnet gestured at HuanJen’s clothes, “Jade probably thinks it’s a bit dull.”
The first move. Garnet could almost hear the click of game pieces on a board.
“No, not really.” HuanJen thought for a moment, eyes sparkling. “Actually she comments little on my appearance. Considering, I find that fortunate.”
Garnet nodded, mind whirling like a tornado. They were on the subject of Jade, she was guiding him towards the overstocks in back, they had time …
“You know, you and she seem quite different lately, more affectionate, at surprising times.” The red-furred woman felt like she was moving the first piece in a chess game.
“Really? I suppose.” HuanJen’s smile was radiant. “Yes, actually, its remarkably liberating. With her, I am myself.”
A cold hand gripped Garnet’s heart. He was happy, this was going to be more difficult than she had expected …
“You what?”
Garnet could almost see Clairice’s upset face over the phone. She was glad Slate was at work. Having him hovering in the living room wouldn’t have been welcome.
“Look, I couldn’t get to him, it wasn’t going to work. I tried being subtle. I kept hitting walls of happy. We got a good deal on a suit at least. Oh, and shoes. His feet are big.”
“I suppose that’s a plus.” Clairice sounded thoughtful. “Lemme work on Jade. She’s got the kind of mind that subtlety works on since she uses it so little …”
January 10th, 2000 AD, Xaian Standard Calendar
PLAN B: Talk with Jade.
Clairice Bell looked at the doorway of HuanJen and Jade’s apartment. This was it, this was the moment of truth. It was time to talk to Jade and tell her that she and her boyfriend needed to watch what they did in public and think of their friends. It was time to rain on the parade.
She felt terrible. It had seemed like such a good idea, especially when Garnet was going to talk to HuanJen. Now, she understood her friend’s reluctance. A rational talk about someone’s relationship sounded quite easy until you were a few seconds from actually doing it.
The nurse knocked on the doorway, each knock a knell of doom. From what Jade had said, HuanJen would be out this evening, which gave her time. Still …
“Hey, Clairice?” Jade opened the door. “Just off of shift? Come on in!”
Clairice’s well-rehearsed speech kicked in as she stepped through the door. “Sure, brought some of those videotapes Lorne had over. That lost-world-in-a-book thing he’s talking abou
t. I …”
“Hello, Clairice,” a familiar, placid voice glowed with sincere friendliness.
HuanJen stood by the patio door, riffling through a satchel. He wasn’t supposed to be home, as far as Clairice knew. He wasn’t when she had called from work.
“Busy day?” Clairice squelched her confusion and set her bag of tapes down on the living room coffee table. “Usually you’re out and about.”
“Had to pick up a few things, I got some of Ahn’s mail again, and had to return a book to the Guildhall Library,” HuanJen rattled off his reasons. “Busy day, about to head out again.”
The nurse nodded. “I won’t be long, don’t let me hold you up.”
“You couldn’t, he’s on one of my schedules.” Jade sauntered over to the Magician-Priest and toyed with his hair “OK, the mousse is working, you got everything love?”
“Yes, perfect. I’m afraid you’ll have to get yourself dinner.” HuanJen leaned his forehead against Jade’s. “Sorry, dearest.”
“Oh, relax, maybe Clairice and I will get something. Hurry back?” The vulpine lay a furred hand on HuanJen’s neck and kissed his forehead. “You know I always miss you when you’re out.”
Clairice fidgeted, feeling very, very extraneous. Part of her felt like they could have wild passionate sex in front of her and not notice she was there - or at least only ask if she’d turn around for a few minutes.
“You flatter me, dearest.” HuanJen planted an affectionate kiss on Jade’s lips. “Now, I’m … going to walk, I think I pushed my limits today.”
“Take care.” The apprentice mystic gave her lover an affectionate swat on the backside. HuanJen let out a playful laugh, breezed by Clairice, and out the door. The nurse tried to remind herself that this was a person who used the words “exorcism” and “alchemy” in everyday conversation.
“Pushed his limits?” The conspirator asked cautiously. The unexpected rear-pat was still trying to register itself in her mind.
“Eh, you know, his little zappy-thingy.” Jade plopped down on a chair in the dining area. “He just gets … weird if he does it too much.”
“Yeah.” Clairice felt her pre-created ‘you two are nauseating script’ disintegrate. She’d had it very firmly in mind until she’d watched them together, which reinforced her commitment, yet distracted her.
“Hey, you OK?” Jade asked. Clairice’s heart turned to ice.
“Well, a bit concerned … about you two.”
“Oh.” Jade motioned to another chair, which Clairice sat in. “I understand. I know why.”
“You do?”
The Vulpine nodded sadly. “It’s OK, I knew this would come out. It’s OK to be concerned.”
Clairice exhaled forcefully, with great relief. She felt the clouds in her mind lift. “Good. It’s embarrassing.”
Jade patted her friend’s hand reassuringly. “Clairice, I know when you had to stay here it probably didn’t help HuanJen and I. But we’re OK, and we don’t blame you. You are, after that and Lorne and all else, my friend. Our friend. It’s OK.”
Clairice tried to climb from the mental rubble of her plans. After she’d lost her apartment, before she’d moved in with Lorne, HuanJen and Jade had put her up. She’d not really worried about their relationship because it hadn’t entered her mind - they, well, they just “were.”
“Thanks.” The nurse managed to get out weakly. “Thanks a lot.”
“It’s fine.” Jade’s smile was friendly and warm, and Clairice felt like she was burning in it. “It’s just like what happened to that complex at the University, it’s fine …”
“I couldn’t go on, Garnet.” Clairice sat in her darkened bedroom, phone in one hand, a margarita in the other. “I mean … what if she’s right? Then I can screw their love life up again.”
“Clairice, Clairice calm down … ” Garnet’s voice was calm, even. It was the kind of voice she’d practiced on Slate a several times.
“I’m trying, damn it. You know, Randy set the date. Lorne’s a groomsman. Ah hell. I’m gonna sleep on it. Hey, does Slate …”
“No.” Garnet’s reassuring tone continued. “He trusts us, look, lets just … think it over. Relax. Let it slide.”
January 13th, Xaian Standard Calendar
PLAN C: Be very, very frustrated
Slate was not a stupid man.
People assumed because he was large and muscular, that his brain had somehow been squeezed out by testosterone and pectorals. The would note that he was prone to anger, that he went silent for occasions, that there were moments he was not speaking because, obviously, he had nothing to say.
They were wrong.
Slate was one of those people who, unfortunately, had a brain that somehow was unable to get the rest of the person to go along with it. Some people could visualize beautiful images and not draw, others could dance in their minds but not with their bodies. Slate was the kind of person whose intelligent thoughts seemed to have trouble manifesting, running into walls of impulsiveness or obstinacy or just a lack of ability to express, the end result being most of his life felt like he was trying to use a straw for a firehose.
Thus, he took his time to do things, to avoid inappropriate actions, to plan and think. It had the added effect, he would admit privately, of surprising the hell out of people that thought he was stupid.
He’d been thinking about his friends, his extended family in this place, in Metris, on Xai. Slate liked things in order. He liked people happy and dinner on the table and children playing in parks and regular hours. He liked things where they should be.
Garnet had failed because she figured HuanJen would be sad to have things pointed out to him. He didn’t like people unhappy, nor did Garnet, and she figured such news would hurt his feelings.
Clarice hadn’t thought through how Jade would react. Jade jumped to conclusions at times, and Clairice had forgotten her own past by focusing on the present. She hadn’t been prepared.
Some people who thought the had the answers right away never actually thought at all. He knew how to take time.
Slate looked up at the Galeneica, home of Guild Medical, all shiny white and carefully designed, none of the chaotic architecture of Shard Tower or the oddness of Guild Esoteric’s Guildhall. It was a symphony in stone and metal, and quite likely in financing; the members of the Constuctionist’s Guild didn’t work cheap. Even after a decade, the Galenica was probably still being paid off.
Ironically he wasn’t even here to meet a member of Guild Medical. Xai changed, and you adapted.
He worked his way through the front desk, clearance, and one rather unpleasant security guard who didn’t seem to appreciate that, technically, he and Slate were in the same line of work. A few minutes of waiting, walking, and instructing, and he entered a large office and saw one of the most unexpected sights in his life.
HuanJen in a business suit.
It was, at cursory examination, the rather odd man who was living with and in love with his sister. There were few six-foot-plus Chinese men with white streaks in their hair in Metris, so Slate was quite sure it was him. However, after some two years of seeing HuanJen in jumpsuits and ritual robes, the business suit somehow seemed wrong.
There was the sense some universal law was being horribly violated. Around someone like the calm alchemist, that sense was unusual disturbing.
“Slate, yes?” HuanJen looked up from the desk. Judging by the messiness of the office and the lack of personal d��cor, it was probably shared with others. He recalled his sister’s lover monitored some of Guild Medical and Guild Esoteric’s shared services a day or two a week, so probably he didn’t get his own office.
“I … ” Slate bit his lip. “Well …”
“Is it the suit? Everyone is reacting oddly to it.” HuanJen sounded troubled and uncomfortable. “Someone even said it made them rethink the formality policy here.”
“It’s different on you.” Slate sidled into the office, closing the door. “Garnet had m
entioned it. Good fit, though. Good.”
“It’s uncomfortable, it is impractical, and the tie is a clip-on, I do not care if it is frowned on, I refuse to wear a pseudo-noose around my neck.” HuanJen paused. “Sorry, busy day and these shoes aren’t helping. I can’t believe people wear these things for formal occasions.”
“I see.” Slate sat in a spare chair, of which there were several, all mismatched. “I’m glad you had time.”
“Some.” The magician-priest shuffled some papers. Slate kept feeling like he was in some sick television special and any moment a cameraman would appear and tell him this had all be a stunt and he’d won some prize. Sadly, he knew this wasn’t the case, since Xaian local television’s attempts to make such shows had run into tragic results with Guild Esoteric and the Lyceum a few years back.
“Well, I have a concern, and I can’t be restrained about it, I …” Slate felt his thoughts fighting to get out all at once.
“Go ahead, please.”
The hulking vulpine nodded. “HuanJen, you and Jade have outbreaks of the most disgusting displays of affection, and at times no one can predict. It’s annoying, unprofessional, and needless to say hard on Lorne. You know how his love life has been even when he hasn’t been dating Clairice’s ex-boyfriends. Besides, you’re so casual we’re concerned that it may occur at inappropriate times.”
“Ah.” The cleric blinked. “Why …”
“Clairice and Garnet tried to talk to you and Jade.”
HuanJen rested his chin on his hands. “I see. I think it didn’t work. They never said anything, Slate.”
Slate nodded. “They used subtlety. They figured it would be easy. That’s why I’m here. I am not subtle, and thus it is easier.”
“You are truly Jade’s brother,” the Magician-Priest acknowledged with a slight grin.
“That I am. Don’t worry, Garnet and I went through a phase like this.”
“Really?” HuanJen clasped his hands together. “I hadn’t noticed, I … rather think that explains a lot, come to think of it. I am not well equipped for some of what I am facing. Still.”
“Relax.” Slate patted the mystic’s arm reassuringly. “I know what it’s like to be new at things. Just take some time, get it out of your system. Time. As in, a day or so. Your clients will understand, and probably thank you. I usually found I just needed time to let things out with Garnet.”
Crossworld of Xai Page 34
