by S. L. Giger
"I go to the gym, watch movies, see my friends. Make sure that my sister doesn't bring home stupid guys. You know, the usual."
"Ah, you have a sister. How old is she?"
"Yes, she's seventeen. How about you?" He then asked. "Do you have any siblings? And how old are you? I don't think old enough to be offended by this question. I hope." He rattled.
I held my breath for a second. Now I'd have to lie about my sister and my age.
"I'm twenty-one. And no, I don't have a brother or sister." I shrugged. It still hurt whenever I had to openly deny that I had a sister somewhere. "How old are you?" I asked.
“Twenty-one as well. And see, that's why I asked you. You could just as easily have been eighteen. Never sure with the girls these days."
I had to pay attention that I used my correct age at the right occasions. My current identity card stated that I was sixteen. I told Alex and the pub crew that I was twenty-one and when I was Serena, I was only seventeen. Who could stay on top of things here?
“So, I am truly sorry about your arm, but I am kind of glad, this accident happened. Otherwise, our paths might never have crossed again anymore, and I am happy they did.” He looked at me with an expression nobody had ever looked at me before. I wished this short silence would have lasted much longer, but he then sat up straighter. “I also have to be honest with you and tell you that I hope this is not the last time they cross.”
“Well, it would be rude not to keep you posted about my arm.”
There was another silence during which we were both smiling. Then, we both concentrated on our pizza again. My reason was that I was fighting the urge to reach for his hands and if I am not mistaken, I’d say his reason was the same.
The evening continued in the same lovely manner. Eventually, we walked back to the metro station. He lived close to the university, and I used Paula’s address as my direction.
When we were standing at the top of the stairs at the metro station, we both were a little unsure what to do. In the end, he gave me a kiss on the cheek. It only lasted a second, but I closed my eyes and fully took in the soft touch of the slight beard stubble on his cheeks. This was too much to bear. I tightly gripped his wrists but just as I wanted to pull him closer to me, I realized that I was about to sexually attack him. In shock, I took a step back.
“Thanks. See you soon.” I mumbled and jogged away. Once I was around the corner, I leaned against the wall and deeply inhaled. I needed to find a way to better control myself around him. Because one thing was completely certain his presence alone gave me such a thrill, that I had to see him again.
Chapter 20
Despite our unusual goodbye, Alex and I set another date. I met Roisin to tell her about the evening.
“I can’t help you with that since I have never felt so drawn to just one guy. But from what I’ve learned from Cathy and Melissa, this is completely normal for a Siren. And from the way I know you, I’m sure that nothing bad will happen to you and him,” she assured me. “Plus, with the puddles and all, I’d say you should give it more time to see where this all leads.”
More time with him sounded good to me. Nevertheless, I swore to myself to fully stay focused all the time. He waved at me when I was walking toward him and then leaned in to give me a kiss on the cheek that didn't last long enough.
We went to get a coffee on the university campus. I love paper cups because they make it so easy to pretend that you’re actually drinking.
We sat down on a bench in the sunshine. A few guys walked by and whistled at us. "Yeah, Alex, way to go man." One of them yelled, and the others clapped and rooted.
"I knew it wasn't a good idea coming here." Alex buried his face in his hands. "You've just had the pleasure of meeting some of my friends." He said when they were out of hearing range.
"They seem lovely," I laughed.
"What do you say, shall we go to my place, where it’s a little quieter?"
"Sure, why not?" When we got up, I slowly exhaled. The prospect of being home alone with him made me very nervous.
We made our way there as quickly as his crutches permitted. He lived in an apartment building a short way off campus with one of his friends, his sister, and one of her friends. All their names were written on a sign on the door. Rachel and Alex Thatcher, I read. I thought that his last name would sound wonderful together with my first name.
Alex gave me the tour of the apartment. Everything looked clean and tidy except for the dishes in the kitchen. They were on the drying rack, piled up like a Jenga tower. They obviously didn't like drying dishes.
"Small but cheap and there is a great atmosphere among the people."
"You moved in with your sister again? You must get along really well," I stated.
"Yes, we are quite close. Maybe that's what happens when your mother dies, and you are still children." He stroked his hands along the kitchen counter.
"Oh, I'm sorry." I put my hands in front of my mouth. "How did she die?" I asked reluctantly.
"She was sick." He pursed his lips. "More exactly, she had a genetic defect that made her sick a lot. In the end, a lung infection killed her."
"How old were you?" I asked carefully.
"Ten. I was in fifth grade. That's why I'm one year behind now; I had to repeat that year."
"And your sister was only six."
"Yeah. My dad did a good job in raising us, but I always watched out for her a little as well. She didn't really understand at first. You know, there is this age difference between us because my mom was practically infertile due to her sickness. It was such huge luck that it worked out once, that nobody thought it would work a second time. But then came Rachel." His sad expression changed into a smile he had trained over the years. "I don't know why I'm telling you all this. I don't usually whine to other people."
"Oh, that's not whining. It's nice that you tell me."
"I guess I just feel comfortable talking to you."
I smiled. We were standing in the kitchen, and there was only about half a meter between us. Half a meter too much.
"So, is that why you study genetics?" I asked.
“That probably also played a role in my decision. But I’ve always liked bio and chemistry.”
“I hated chemistry,” I laughed. “I was always afraid that I’d break the test tube or light something on fire. The theoretical part was ok.”
“I’m sure it wasn’t that bad.”
“Well, I survived it, but I’m glad I have nothing to do with it anymore. I just wish I had some kind of passion, too. That would make it easier to find some kind of direction.” I leaned against the counter, next to him.
“You will figure it out. You can start studying throughout your whole life. It’s not like your high school degree will run out.”
“I hope it won’t take me that long.” Our arms accidentally brushed against each other, and we both stared at that spot for a moment.
“Would you like a glass of water? Or anything else to drink?” He offered.
“No, I am fine, thanks.”
“You know what else sometimes helps to give some direction?” He asked.
“What?”
“Music. Let’s go to my room I can put my phone on the docking station.”
We relocated to his room, which he shared with Brendon.
It suddenly felt very luxurious that I had my own room.
Clothes, mostly sweaters, hung from bedposts and thrown over the chairs. The desks were surprisingly tidy, only with a few cables, a cup with pens and a laptop on the left desk. Hanging above the left bed was a poster of a football player and an acoustic guitar. The guitar was mirrored above the other bed, but the poster was exchanged with one of a sports car.
"Guess which side is mine." Alex leaned against the door frame.
"I'd go with this one." I turned to face him and pointed to the side with the football poster.
"I don't strike you as the car guy?", he joked.
&nbs
p; "You could be. But that family picture on your bedside table gave you away. You still have something of that little boy about you."
"I don't know whether I can take it as a compliment that you compare me to my nine-year-old self."
It was the sparkling eyes with these long eyelashes.
"Where did you get these eyelashes from?" I asked.
"My mom. Her mother is Colombian, and I guess they passed that on to us. My sister has them too."
"You could make a commercial for mascara."
"Says the one who could be the star on any catwalk."
"Well, you know, still waiting for them to discover me." I threw my hair back over the shoulder like a diva.
Alex chuckled and limped past me to turn on the music. Then he sat down on his bed.
"You can sit down here too if you want."
I hesitated. My eyes were drawn to his chest, from where his heart was calling out to me. I wondered how close I could go without losing control. I sat down at the foot end of his bed. For a moment, there was a bit of an awkward silence because we were sitting on a bed and he too would have preferred to do something else than sit there. I was overcome by exciting tingles, but I could tell he was also nervous.
He got up again and installed himself on the opposite bed. This didn’t improve the situation since we were now facing each other directly.
“Where are the others? Are they still at uni?”
“My sister and Carmen probably yes, since they attend a summer course. Brendon went home over vacations.”
“So, you have this room to yourself for the moment?” I asked and then in my paranoia thought that this could have a hidden sexual implication. “Are you doing a summer course too?” I therefore added.
“No, I’m working on my project, and once I can walk without crutches, I will be back in the Deli too,” he sighed. “It’s kind of quiet here at the moment. Most people are gone.”
“So, you work in a Deli?” I picked up on his remark.
“Yes, see, we’re both in hospitality.”
We sat for a little while longer and talked about our parents and the upcoming fourth of July weekend.
When it was time to leave, Alex accompanied me to the door. Then he was standing between me and the closed door, debating what to do next. He took a step toward me again, and I hardly dared to breathe. Just as it started to get interesting, Alex’s sister opened the door. She had the same perfect eyelashes as her brother. Her skirt with flower prints and the bright yellow t-shirt reminded me that summer was around the corner.
“Oh, hi!” She said. On her right shoulder, she carried a heavy looking bag. “I guess your plan of hiding her from me has gone astray by a few minutes.” A broad grin stretched across her face.
“I wasn’t hiding her,” Alex said somewhat embarrassed.
“And you weren’t lying about how pretty she is.” She looked back at me with big eyes.
“Okay, let’s get this over with. Nathalie, that’s my sister Rachel, who gets overly excited when she sees me with a girl." Alex put an arm around her shoulder. A contact that I would have liked to have as well.
"Well, I'm still not entirely convinced whether he is gay or not." She bit her tongue and smiled.
"Thanks for that. I already made a complete fool of myself once in front of her. You don't have to ruin the slightest chance I might have had left."
"Okay, sorry. He most likely is not gay. And thank you for calling the ambulance for him." She said to me.
"Of course, anyone would have done that."
"I'm sure you have important homework to do now, right?" Alex urged.
“Fine, I see, I’m not really welcome here. Just be careful, Nathalie, my brother, can be a bit of a weirdo. A nice one, though.” She said and gave him a friendly clap on the back.
“See you.” She waved as she was entering her room.
“Bye, see you.” I waved back, and she closed the door to her room behind her.
Alex stepped out into the hallway with me and closed the door behind him.
"Perhaps hiding you from her might not have been a bad idea."
"Why, she was nice," I said. "So, you don't usually bring home girls?" I teased to find out more about potential girlfriends and friends. We still hadn't approached that subject in any way.
"I do but not like this. More in a group, you know, with other friends. But I'm not gay; I can assure you that.”
Although I had hoped this, I was surprised that a guy like him could be single. The thought that he could be gay hadn't occurred to me before, but that would be just my luck. For Roisin, these things happen so easily.
"What about you? Any hidden boyfriends?" He asked while we walked to the elevator together. The building had only five floors, and we were on the fourth. But I guess if you are on crutches you are glad about any stairs you don't have to climb.
"Nope. And at the moment no imaginary ones either."
"Good to know." He smiled.
The elevator arrived.
"So, I see you Sunday?" He asked.
That was my next day off.
"Yes, see you Sunday."
This time he gave me a hug and then a kiss on the cheek. He smelled like a fresh, manly shower gel. After the hug, he quickly turned away. Before disappearing behind the door, he waved bye again. Alone, I stepped into an empty elevator, confused all over again.
Chapter 21
Fourth of July was a beautiful day. I spent the morning with Melissa and Luke at the beach between all the other folks that had arrived with their picnic baskets and camping chairs. At 11 am, I had to leave for work, but it was extremely quiet when I got to the pub. I spent hours cleaning vitrines and glass shelves. Then, I stocked up all the fridges and stood in front of the pub to enjoy a few sunrays. I read all the proverbs at least twice and, once I really didn’t know what to do with myself anymore, played a few rounds of hangman with Josh. I much preferred the evenings when I hardly had time to think about anything else but orders.
Thank God when Paula finally came.
“Wow, don’t overstrain yourself.” She yelled at me when she walked in and I was daydreaming, leaning against the counter.
“It has never been so slow here. I could have taken a nap, and nobody would have cared.”
“Don’t worry; it will pick up once the fireworks are done.”
The city provided big fireworks at 8 pm.
As Paula told me about her day and showed me the new sports clothes she bought time started to fly by. At 7.30 pm, a pleasant surprise in the form of Alex walked through the door.
“Speaking of the devil,” Paula winked at me.
“Hey, what are you doing here?” I asked. “I thought you were with your friends.”
“I was. They are down at the pier. But I thought I come by to say hello and see whether I perhaps could steal you away for an hour to watch the fireworks.” He showed an innocent puppy face smile.
I couldn’t believe he had thought of me. I glanced over to Paula. She knew exactly that I wanted to go.
“Go, it’s not like a soccer team will storm the pub within the next 10 minutes. Just hurry up with whatever you are doing after the fireworks.” She grinned.
“Thanks. See you later!” I shook my head, grabbed my jacket and stepped out into the agreeable evening breeze.
"I didn't think it was fair that you needed to work through the big show." Alex tried to explain his sudden showing up.
"Thank you for coming to save me then." I noticed how people parked themselves on camping chairs inside alleys too.
"Where are we going?"
"Somewhere, where we have a nice view," Alex smiled.
We walked to the next metro station and then squeezed into an overcrowded train. Being pushed against strangers on all sides wasn’t the most pleasant feeling. Being squeezed against tall and deliciously smelling Alex made up for that though.
"Don't worry, it's only two stops,"
Alex said.
We followed the stream of people upstairs and got out near the harbor.
"I figured we wouldn't be the only ones. Good thing that fireworks aren't on the ground.
We pushed past groups of people, who kindly parted the way to let the guy on crutches through. Along the pier, there were concrete cubes, and we found one that nobody was standing on. Alex held out his hand to me.
"After you." I grabbed it and stepped on the cube. Alex followed me a moment later. Now we were a little higher than the people around us. Also, we were standing rather close. I could feel the heat of his body radiate against me. It made it hard to concentrate on anything else.
"What have you been up to today?" I turned half around to face him.
"We had a BBQ at my friend’s house and pretty much ate all day." He patted his stomach.
"Sounds like a good day."
"The best part about it is now." He looked at me, leaving me unsure whether it was because of me or because of the fireworks that were about to start. To mark the beginning, there were three red fireballs shot into the air. Like the emergency lights on boats. More explosions in all kinds of colors followed and reflected on all the upward turned faces. I had my back against Alex again. Just as my neck started to hurt from craning it up too much, Alex put his hands on my shoulders to massage them. I hoped that he didn't notice the goosebumps his touch provoked. I rested immobile until I couldn't bear it any longer. I turned around again. His hands were still on my shoulders. I looked up into his eyes and found the reassurance that he wanted to kiss me, too.
"I'm not sure this is such a good idea." He breathed.
I was confused whether I had heard correctly since it was quite loud. The phrase didn't make any sense to me.
"What do you mean?"
"Ever since I saw you the first time, I want to be with you. I'm trying hard not to appear like a stalker. I've never felt so strongly pulled toward someone before. And I am afraid if I kiss you, I might lose the last bit of control I possess." As he was saying that, his hands wandered to the back of my neck, his fingers gently finding their way through my hair. I closed my eyes. "It might be a bit late to back out now," I whispered.
