Ella watched surprise, then disappointment register on his face. She knew his ego had suffered the ultimate blow, being refused in public. Whispering back, Bob pled with her, “For God’s sake, don’t embarrass me. Not here, like this.”
Ella blushed and looked down at the ring on her finger. There was nothing more to say. He wanted to play out the little charade and she saved face for him.
He finished his meal and rose from the table. As they walked to the coat check, several employees at The Club asked to see Ella’s new ring. She held her hand out and they made the appropriate comments. Ella caught the enormous ring on her cashmere wrap and untangled it. She had no idea how she could live with this massive ring on her finger. It wasn’t sensible. She was a gardener and wanted a low-profile diamond, if any at all. Although they’d only window shopped once, she remembered specifically telling him that. It was obvious that Bob knew nothing about what she wanted. The diamond was more of a statement about him than her. She would wear it home to save face for him at the club, but decided to refuse it once she got home.
Walking home with Bob became an interrogation session.
“So, how do you like the ring? You’ve been awfully quiet since it’s been on your finger.” Bob asked her.
“It’s lovely, Bob. I can only imagine how much you paid for it.” Ella murmured. She couldn’t tell him her true feelings. It was a monstrosity, something a real housewife on a bad television show would wear. Not Ella’s style at all. But it wasn’t just the ring she couldn’t accept, it was Bob’s proposal. “I can’t accept this, Bob.”
“Well, if you must know I spent half of my bonus on that ring.” This was Bob’s way of telling her how much he cared: the price tag.
“I’m sorry if I embarrassed you inside The Club. It was too…public.” Ella said.
“Okay,” Bob recovered, “You can tell me now. When do you want to set the date for the wedding?”
“I don’t want the ring and I am not planning a wedding. I need time to heal right now. I am getting over the sudden loss of my father. I’ve been very emotional lately. You’ve not been here to notice.” With tears in her eyes, Ella felt she was pointing out the obvious. But she always felt that way with Bob. This was the dance they did, over and over and over. “I’m sorry, Bob. You may have to exercise a little bit of patience.”
“Right. You want me to be patient. Got it.” Bob was trying to appease her.
“Let’s just go home and change the subject for tonight.” Ella suggested. She was truly exhausted with the whole discussion.
But Bob wasn’t done with the subject. An imposing figure at six-foot four, he stopped on the path and stood in front of Ella. As his hands grasped her shoulders he put his face close to hers, “We’re getting married and that’s final. I don’t want to change the subject. This is the subject, damn it. I love you, Ella. You’re the one who’s got to be more reasonable. What’s up with you lately? Everything I do seems to be wrong.”
She couldn’t withstand the intense glare of his blue eyes. Her eyes dropped to his suit and she felt his grasp loosen. She knew he felt defeated and he did not deal with that emotion well. “Please, Bob, can we just go home?”
He grasped her hand, “You love me, right honey?”
Automatically, Ella muttered, “Of course I do.” For a moment, Bob was silent.
“I’ll contact The Club tomorrow, honey….you do want to get married there, right?” He was like a dog with a bone. He would not give up.
“Let’s talk about it tomorrow, Bob.” Ella murmured. And they continued walking. Finally he seemed to acquiesce. There was a moment of silence as their feet stirred in the dried fallen leaves on the path.
“So, what did the attorney say about your father’s estate? Is everything wrapped up?” Bob was trying to sound casual but she knew he wanted every detail.
“The appraisals are done and the attorney is preparing some paperwork that I need to sign. Cassie said she’ll be the witness.” Ella stated.
“What’s this guy’s name?” Bob asked, suddenly more interested.
“Ray Adriano.” Ella replied.
They arrived home and Boomer was crying to go outside. “That’s okay, Molly. I’ll take him out.” Ella said softly and handed the teenager a twenty. “Thanks for watching Boomer.” She picked up the puppy and took him outside for a moment. She heard Bob going upstairs to change. She waited for Boomer, but while outside she looked up at the starlit night and couldn’t help but think how different tonight would have been with Ray. For one thing, she wouldn’t have been at a stuffy country club drinking champagne. She inhaled the fresh night air deeply, steeling herself for whatever was coming. She sensed her life with Bob was changing, shifting somehow, but she wasn’t sure what course would be taken. She still felt adrift in a dinghy on a very large ocean, very much alone, without a paddle.
Ella prepared for bed and Bob was already in it with the television on, engrossed in something on his laptop. She took off the enormous ring and put it back into the little box it came in and left it in the master bedroom closet on a shelf. A moment later he was talking on the phone to someone. She slipped out of the dress and put it into the closet and found her favorite robe. “Need anything? I’m going downstairs for ice cream.” No answer. Maybe he didn’t hear her.
Padding downstairs barefoot with Boomer in her arms, she decided on a tiny dish of ice cream. She’d let Boomer lick the bowl. More than ever, Ella wanted someone to talk to. She knew Cassie was out on a date tonight. She propped up the iPad and noticed Ray’s light was glowing on the side.
Hello, how are you tonight? She messaged him.
Ray answered immediately, Great. Was just thinking of you.
Ella sent a reply: Really?
Ray answered: Was listening to some music and loved this song. He embedded the link to “I Can’t Love You Back” by Easton Corbin on YouTube.
When Ella plugged her earbuds in and listened to the song, tears welled in her eyes. She messaged back: That was absolutely beautiful.
For a moment Ella stared at the screen. She pondered her reply. Then sent a response: I really need to talk with you on Friday about something personal.
Ray’s response was rapid: Yes, I’ve booked a room right next to yours at the Low Tide. I think we need to have a long talk about a pre-nup if you’re thinking of marrying Bob. I’m only your attorney, but you need to think it through. Protect yourself.
Ella ended the conversation: I’ll see you Friday, then. Have a good night.
She played the song over again and it had the same effect on her. The song made her think of how much she missed Ray, even though she had just met him. She really couldn’t love him back, and he knew that. It was uncanny, as if he was reading her mind when he sent her that song. How did he know so much about her? Or was it just coincidence?
She should be sleeping; tomorrow would be a busy day and she planned to take Boomer with her on showings. She needed to train him and being with her around the clock would make it easier. Thank goodness she had an office on the ground floor and owned the building. Or, at least her father had owned the building before she inherited it. Ella counted her blessings before turning her thoughts to Bob. She knew he had another trip planned for Germany coming right up. She was happy to have Boomer to keep her company. It was so obvious to her that she was lonely, but Bob seemed to think their relationship was just fine. It was, for him.
No longer could she put her feelings on hold. She needed to be held and wanted; she felt a loneliness far worse than what living alone would produce. She was living a life, in a world, she didn’t want to be in - with a person she used to say she loved. That was the first time she admitted that to herself. Maybe she should be giving Bob another chance. It wasn’t that he was a bad guy, he just didn’t seem to be her guy. If Ray hadn’t come along when he did, she might have married Bob on the spot. But her father’s death changed everything. It was an awakening, it seemed. She wanted to talk to Bob about her fee
lings, but he was the source of her dilemma. She needed to talk to Ray, get his advice, from a man’s point of view, about marrying Bob and all that would entail financially.
Cassie would think she was crazy for even refusing the nine-carat diamond. On the outside, Bob appeared to be the perfect catch. But Cassie didn’t know what it was like to live with him. The demands, the insults, the passive-aggressive behavior. Bob had to have it his way -- always. One thing Ella knew she needed to do was talk to Bob, heart to heart. But she also knew she was one of those people who sought to avoid conflict whenever possible. This didn’t help the situation.
One other thing weighing heavily on her mind was the obligation she felt regarding the promise she had made to her father. It was his wish that she marry Bob. But right now she couldn’t see that far ahead. Since her father’s death, something inside her had changed. It was as if she was living in a protective bubble while he was alive. She worried about nothing. But the moment her father died it was as if her force field disappeared and she was raw and exposed to the harsh realities of the world. Even her attitude about life became different. She had serious doubts about Bob being the guy she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. She knew she wanted a loving relationship and children. She just didn’t know if Bob was capable of participating in one. At this point, he didn’t even want a dog.
When she got upstairs Bob was asleep and she turned off the television. She brushed her teeth and slid into bed, trying not to disturb him. He had to be exhausted. Maybe she didn’t have a loving relationship with Bob because she didn’t appreciate him enough. Yes, he could be demanding, but she constantly wondered if she was living up to his expectations. She must be. He asked her to marry him tonight. She was raw right now with grief and loneliness. She needed to give this time. Maybe things with Bob would change for the better once she got past this horrible feeling of loss. Then again, she wondered if the horrible feeling would ever completely go away. She could not imagine laughing, enjoying life, looking forward to things as she did before.
Ella slept fitfully and woke in the morning to a long list of showings. Bringing Boomer with her was a big hit with potential clients. Everyone wanted to pet him and he was no bother at all. In fact, he ate and slept in his dog bed underneath her desk at the end of the day for two hours while she caught up on paperwork and returned phone calls. The last call of the day was a surprise. Ray called her cell phone and she picked up on the first ring.
“Hey, how are you?” his deep voice resonated over the speaker of her phone.
“Great, and you?” She asked politely.
“All set for Friday?” he asked.
“Yes. And you?” She asked back.
“I can’t wait to see you again.” He said the words she was longing to hear. A shot of anticipation ran through her as she thought about kissing Ray. And in a second all of the sweet messages on Facebook filed through her mind. There was a pregnant pause before she said anything back, but finally she let herself go. “I feel the same way. Had a lot of fun with you last weekend.” Ella confessed.
Boomer woke and cried to go outside. “Hey, I’ve got to go. See you Friday.” And Ella ended the phone call. She put Boomer’s leash on and walked outside. She didn’t want to lead Ray on and make him think she was his girl or something like that. It was only a kiss. Or, was it? She had never been kissed like that before. And Ella wanted more than anything to just be in Ray’s presence and laughing once again.
When she got home, she asked Molly next door to take Boomer overnight. She knew Bob wanted nothing to do with the puppy. And, she knew better than to leave Boomer with someone who didn’t want him. Plus, she trusted Molly. She loved dogs as much as Ella did, probably more.
She packed an overnight bag and put it into her car. Ella, Cassie and Paige would leave for the shopping adventure right after work tomorrow. She remembered to pack her toothbrush and mouthwash. Then tossed in a pack of spearmint gum for good measure. She wasn’t thinking of keeping her breath fresh for the shopping trip; she imagined dinner with Ray alone and maybe a few hours of conversation afterward. What was she thinking? She wanted so much to see him again. The shopping trip was all about being in his presence, not the usual girl stuff.
When she got into her car to drive to the office, there was a post-it note written in Bob’s handwriting on her steering wheel, “I’ll miss you, honey. Call me when you can.” That was nice of him. Maybe he felt badly that he fell asleep without kissing her goodnight. Maybe he sensed she was slipping away. Bob didn’t want anyone to tell him he couldn’t have something he wanted. That was his nature. He was persistent, if not somewhat spoiled in getting his every wish. She found that annoying sometimes. Especially when he talked down to service people or treated some of her friends disrespectfully. It was as if he didn’t even realize he was doing it. Ella wondered if that would ever change, then realized it was insane to expect Bob to change his personality for her. He wasn’t even aware he was behaving improperly. That was who he was.
That was one of the things she noticed about Ray that was so different. He was respectful to everyone he met. It didn’t matter if a guy pushed a broom or drove a truck, he said hello to everyone or nodded to acknowledge their existence. He made eye contact. He smiled and laughed. And, the funny stories were enthralling. He was a guy who had been around, experienced in ways that Bob never would understand. Not that Ray was a thug, but he had a touch of the street about him. He was a bit of a ruffian and having that essence made Ella feel protected, safe, almost like she did when her father was alive. She imagined he would protect her with brute force if need be. She never had that feeling of security and refuge with Bob.
She looked at the post-it note written by him. It took a lot for him to do something like that. He was usually in a rush to get to his office. She rarely had breakfast with him. He was an early riser and so busy throughout the day, he seldom contacted her. She wondered why he left this note at this time. Was he trying to make amends for some of his behavior? Did he really love her? She had so many more questions than answers at this time. Maybe getting away with the girls would be a good thing for a night.
When she pulled into her parking spot, she put Boomer on his leash and walked inside. The receptionist smiled and winked at her. Ella wondered what that as about. When she walked into her office space at the brokerage, there was an enormous floral bouquet of pale pink roses, there had to be two dozen. Ella ran to open the card and a few of the women in the office gathered around her doorway. Bob’s note touched her, I’ll miss you, honey. She inhaled the sweet aroma and smiled. Maybe he did love her. Maybe he was thinking about her.
The girls in the office came in to examine the flowers and all of them made silly comments, “Must have been a good night last night, eh?” one of them said. Ella smiled.
“Yeah, it was a great night.” She lied. It had been one of loneliest nights of her life.
The small crowd that had gathered in her office dissipated leaving her to the pile of phone messages on her desk. One by one, Ella called each person back scheduling appointments or changing them. All the while wondering why Bob sent flowers. He seldom did something like that. There was more to the note on her steering wheel and the beautiful arrangement sitting on her desk. Something was going on in Bob’s mind that he wasn’t sharing with her, not yet anyway.
There were so many differences between them. Bob wanted to travel the globe when he wasn’t nailing down deals. Ella wanted to have a child and make a home. She had figured by the age of thirty-five Bob would have changed and been more willing to settle down. But now she was having her doubts. If only he’d stop and smell the roses, literally, he might find that he could enjoy life more rather than planning the next stop, the next client, or the next win. Even as she enjoyed the beauty of the roses, she knew they would fade and die in a matter of days; this was how she felt about her relationship with Bob. It blossomed and looked beautiful for a while, but now the enchantment had worn off. And, her feel
ings for him were dying.
~ Ray ~
As he closed the iPad he took a deep breath. Damn, he was hoping Ella was having second thoughts about Bob. He glanced around his one-bedroom apartment and decided to exercise while the late night news came on. He had to keep himself as strong as possible since the back surgeries. Even though he couldn’t bench press like he used to, he did his usual weight routine. He was now good friends with his physical therapist, Raoul. He’d stop in the bar sometimes on the weekend and chat with Ray, even though Raoul didn’t drink. He lived nearby and liked to shoot the breeze. He was a good guy. Ray had done some legal work for him gratis.
It was important for Ray to keep his arms strong but he was restricted to using light weights when it involved his back muscles. He was dedicated to the cause of staying healthy; well, as healthy as a guy with a broken back and four major operations could be. His main focus was on his lower body and his legs were in good shape. The bike in his apartment served two purposes. He used it as an exercise machine and transportation around the city on weekends.
Fallen for Her: Book 2 Page 4
