by Mia Ford
We even found a few private areas around the resort where we took part in outdoor sex. There were places in the trees where we’d crouch low to the ground as our bodies slapped together, me riding Perry while he met me thrust-for-thrust. I always struggled to keep from screaming his name as I came, clutching his strong shoulders as I felt the waves of pleasure ripping through me.
There were places on our beach where we could be alone and in the water as he fingered my clit to a release, his fingers buried inside of my bathing suit as I bit down on my lip to keep from crying out his name.
I gave him a blowjob at one of the bars one night, outside and around a corner where we could hear but not see some of the other guests. I was down on my knees, taking him into my mouth as I pulled against his ass. Perry was big, but I’d learned to relax and get him deep into my throat, and tonight he was fucking my mouth with earnest. I felt him thicken before he shot inside of my mouth, eager to swallow it all down as he panted and held my hair. He dragged me to my feet and back to the cottage, leaving our drinks at the bar so that he could fuck me hard and deep while I was on my knees in the living room. We’d christened every surface of the cottage and joked that they would have to clean up well after we were gone, something that made me a little sad.
Perry had a successful business back home, but I wanted to be here with him forever. I knew that I worked hard through school to go back and get a stable job that I’d dreamed of for so long, but a part of me would give up all of that to stay here with him. He could never work again or do it from afar and be just fine, along with the money from my parents. I’d never ask that of him, though.
I would just go home and have faith in whatever happened.
The last day was one where we explored all our favorite places, taking endless pictures of the turtles and fish that swam just under the surface of the deeper water. I made a point of taking photos of us, memorizing the natural happiness in his face as well as the way that his blue eyes shimmered. Perry was gorgeous and meant everything to me, and I wanted these memories for the rest of my life. I walked the soft sand of the beach, taking in the sound of the waves as I looked all around and fought the urge to cry. Perry took me to a special dinner that night in the restaurant, where I sipped wine and tried to hold my emotions in. I knew that he could see right through me, smiling as he told me that everything was going to be good.
He took me back to the cottage and right up to bed, worshiping my body with his mouth and hands. I cried as I came before he crawled over me and entered me with one deep thrust. It was carnal and raw, expressing all the mixed emotions between us. Perry drew my feet to his shoulders as he took me, staring down into my eyes. I came first with a guttural cry before he shot deep inside of my pussy, rocking slowly against me.
We dozed lightly, waking up to move together all over again several times during the night as well as first thing in the morning. Our flight was early, and I was quiet as we made our way to the plane. I slept on the longer flight, feeling a sense of dread as we came closer to Colorado. Something was going to happen, though I didn’t know what.
Even his hand holding mine in my sleepy state didn’t assure me as we moved closer to home.
I came back to find a few emails about possible jobs, all over a few states. My internship and high grades paid off, and I read all the messages with a mix of excitement and dread. The best overall offer was from a graphic design company in California, on the beach. They had an excellent starting wage, incredible benefits, and perks and it was in one of the most beautiful coastal towns on the west coast.
I accepted an interview, flying over to meet with the head CEO to talk in person. I packed as Perry watched from the doorway of my room, asking me questions about the position. We’d cooled down considerably after arriving back home, which had a lot to do with my withdrawal from him. I suppose it was to protect myself against the inevitable. I knew that I would accept a job at some point and perhaps even move, not surprised when the best offer was in another state.
Even Perry had to admit that this job sounded perfect, urging me to do well at the interview. Before I would have hugged him for that, but now he just got a smile.
I checked into my hotel in Santa Barbara, looking out over the water that was a darker blue than the one that I would always coin as mine and Perry’s. It was still gorgeous, though, and I licked my lips as I glanced at the white bag from the local drug store that was sitting on the table. Its contents would have everything to do with my decision about this job and my future.
It just might change everything for me.
Chapter Ten
Perry
Once we were back, I thought that I’d enjoy being back at the office and normal life. I knew that Caroline was going to start considering jobs and the beginning of her life, though I preferred the one that happened at The Brando Resort. She was everything that I could have wanted, in and out of the bedroom. Caroline kept me interested and laughing when we were talking, always waiting for the next words from her mouth. It was always a natural and easy time with her, as it always had been without the electric attraction between us. I knew that others noticed it, both men and women, and it fueled my desire for her further. She was a beautiful woman, and though I didn’t tell her, I was falling for her. I wanted to ask her to stay with me, but she worked too hard to give up her dreams. It was what her parents would want as well. I had to honor that.
I watched her pull away from me once we were home, though I knew that she couldn’t deny the feelings and attraction between us.
They were heavy in the air as she talked about the interest she’d received once we got back. Caroline sounded excited when she told me about what each company offered, making my heart drop when she said that the one in Santa Barbara offered her the best package. That wasn’t far as far as distance, and it could be worse. I just knew that she wouldn’t be here with me, safe in my care. Caroline had someone always watching over her, whether it was her parents or me as her guardian. Now I was looking at her, talk about her future all on her own when it felt like my heart was breaking inside of my chest.
I hadn’t had that feeling since I lost my best friend and his wife.
I asked her about the job as she packed to go for the interview, trying to sound like a guardian would. In truth, I couldn’t stop thinking about how beautiful she looked when she came for me. I couldn’t ever forget how it was to be inside of her that first time, the first man in her life. I felt honored that her dad was the first man to love her and that I was the one she gave that precious gift to. I would never forget how it felt to hold her in my arms as I slept, and now my big bed felt empty and cold.
Caroline was moving closer to her future, though. That was what mattered. She folded clothes for the two nights that she would be there, talking about the company and perks that came with the job offer. Caroline mentioned how much she loved the beach and I wanted to scream at her how much I knew that. I was the one making love to her every night and morning with the sound of the waves coming through the open windows. I wanted to remind her how it felt as I fingered her in the water, feeling her tremble against me as a climax tore through her. I remembered all of that as she kept talking, and I clenched my fists.
Could she actually walk away from us?
I drove her to the airport the following morning, hearing her nervous babble the entire way. Caroline wouldn’t look at me. When I dropped her at the curb, she gave me a loose hug and walked inside of the terminal with barely a backward glance.
I thought that everything improved at the island between us once we gave into our desire. I wasn’t sure how it might work when we arrived home due to the nature of our relationship, and I didn’t think that she was either.
I also didn’t expect her to be looking through job offers so quickly, but why was I surprised? She was brilliant, and I was confident that her reputation preceded Caroline after the impressive work during her internships. She needed to see what she could get, something that see
med to be a weight on both of our shoulders.
I drove home from the airport alone, feeling a little lost. I wasn’t ready for Caroline to leave me, especially after the vacation. Everything about that was perfect, and what I wanted in my life, just with a woman I would have never considered before. She moved from a little girl that needed me to take care of her to a sexy, mature woman that got me going, even now sitting alone in this car.
Fuck. I drove out of the parking lot and home, going right to work in my home office as the silence settled in the house. The last eight years played through my mind, the good and the bad. I finally admitted that I loved Caroline inside of my head, deeply and in a way, that I’d never feel about anybody else.
I went to work early the following morning and stayed through the afternoon. Stella told me that I looked happy when I came back and told her that I had a great time. I wasn’t even as eager to be in the office, not like I thought I would be with the knowledge that Caroline was at home.
Today, she poked her head in when it was time to go home and raised an eyebrow at me. “What are you doing, boss?”
“Just finishing some stuff up,” I tried to sound casual despite the tapping of my feet under the desk. I was on edge and couldn’t get Caroline out of my head. I might not go home at all, knowing that the house was empty now.
“So, you went to a gorgeous place for the better part of a month just to come home to being a workaholic? Didn’t you learn anything?” She sounded mildly angry, and I glanced at her, seeing the concern in her eyes.
“It’s who I am, Stella.” I tapped on my keyboard to sound like I was working hard.
“You need a woman in your life, Perry,” she snapped before turning to leave as I dropped my hands on my desk.
I had a woman, and she was amazing. I made love to her every way that we could think of after I got to know her mind and soul. I was in love with her, and I sent her to find a life without me. I stared at my phone for a moment before picking it up. I dialed and leaned back in my chair, listening to the ringing until her voice mail picked up. “Hi, Caroline. I was just calling to see how things were going. Give me a call back,” I murmured before ending the call.
I went home at nine that night, drinking a bottle of whiskey in her room as I sat against the bed. It smelled like her sweet apple perfume, and I closed my eyes as I took another swig from the bottle.
I dragged myself into work the next morning with a hangover, drinking coffee to get through the day. When I got home at ten, I walked into the house and felt Caroline’s presence. I looked into the kitchen and then walked up to her room to see her staring into her closet. “Hi,” I said as she kept staring forward. “How did it go?”
“I got the job,” she replied as she pulled out an armload of shirts. “They got me a condo, and I am going to drive there tomorrow and get settled. They need to fill the position soon, and I don’t have anything to hold me here.”
“You don’t?” I asked as she moved to the bed and folded the shirts into a big suitcase with a fixed expression on her face. There was a part of me that hoped she’d come home and tell me that she wanted a future with me that formed in my head during those lonely nights at work.
“I went to college to get my dream job, Perry. You can finally be on your own and start your life. You deserve to have something more,” Caroline told me as I tilted my head. She sounded robotic, and I stepped into the room.
“More than what? More than what we had on the islands?” My voice rose in anger as she blinked at me. There was a pain in her eyes before she looked away.
“I don’t want you, Perry. I want this job and my house on the beach.” I stared at her in a stunned silence for a long moment before I turned to leave the room. I got back into my car and headed to a bar, my emotions reeling at her claim as I tossed back a few shots.
I couldn’t believe that she was moving away. I couldn’t believe that she chose the job over us, something that we hadn’t discussed since the morning that we left the resort. I ordered another shot, feeling my vision blur as the numbness set in.
I went home with a brunette that night, trying to fuck Caroline out of my system a few ways. I woke up the following morning with a stranger whose name I didn’t remember, stumbling out of the front door after I called for a cab. I had him take me back to the bar, hopping in my SUV to head home as my heart sank. Had I fucked up by leaving? Would Caroline be gone?
I pulled through the gate, into the driveway and pushed the garage door button as I stared forward. It was empty, and I blinked for a moment before pulling forward. Did she get any sleep at all before she left? Would she be all right? I came to a hard stop and hurried into the house, calling out her name. “Caroline? Are you here?” I ran up to her room to see the closet emptied as well as her bathroom before I walked into the hallway.
She was gone without saying goodbye. After all the years, we’d known each other, lived in the same house, I didn’t expect this. Maybe I did with what happened when we were on vacation, but when I looked back at all of it, Caroline seemed so happy. She appeared to be a woman in love every time that she looked at me, and I wondered if that scared her as much as it did me.
I convinced myself that she would call once she was settled, or that I would. I wasn’t going to let it go this easily since she was under my skin now. I’d find a way to work this out with Caroline and convince her that we were perfect together, but for now, she could have some space. I knew how empty the house was going to feel, but there was not going to be another woman here to keep my bed warm, at least not until I spoke to Caroline about what happened between us.
The first week, I worked a lot and let her have time to settle in. Everything felt empty when I returned home, and I didn’t even bother cooking too much anymore. I just grabbed food on the way home and worked it off in the gym before work in the morning. It became routine, but it didn’t make me happy. Nothing made me happy the way that she did, the women that used to tide me over not even getting my attention these days.
I started calling the week after I assumed she was moved in and on a schedule. I got her voice mail and left a message, sending her a text later when I hadn’t heard back. I did the same thing the following day with the same results and tossed and turned in bed as the worry set in. Caroline was a beautiful girl, and anything could happen, a fact that ate away at me as days went by without any response.
I checked the news in Santa Barbara once another two weeks had passed, reading about every crime that happened anywhere nearby. I knew that she spoke to a lot of firms, but I couldn’t remember the name of the one that she was working for. I was in too much shock that it happened so fast. I never thought that Caroline would be able to leave so easily, not after the bond we formed after her parents died. I was still in control of her money as far as I knew, so we had to talk sometime.
Within three months, I still hadn’t heard anything. I asked a friend who was a private investigator to find her for me, giving him the information needed. I just had to know that she was all right and stop keeping myself up at night worrying about all the possibilities. He came back with the name of her new company, Anagrama. I promptly researched them thoroughly, which I would have done anyway if she gave me half a chance, finding them to be one of the best in the world. I couldn’t fault her company, so I wondered what was going on as I read everything that he found out in the week that he’d taken.
She seemed to be doing well as far as Matt could tell. I didn’t ask for intimate details of her life since I didn’t think I could handle that yet. I found out that she lived in a condo near the beach that was in a complex owned by the firm, giving me the impression that she didn’t have a permanent home yet. I knew that she was alive and I let it rest with that for now, giving her this time to be stubborn before I went there myself.
I fucking missed her. I missed the mornings where we’d just talk, eat dinner together or just laugh. I didn’t know how much she meant to me until we got so close on the island and
left shortly after coming home. I knew that I loved her as something of a daughter, but it never clicked that I’d fall for her on a romantic level. It was more than sex, and I thought back to the nights that we spent together, trying to remember if I told her that. I hated that idea that she might think I was using her.
Once four months went by without any word from her and I knew that the holidays were in just a couple more months, I bought a plane ticket online. Caroline was going to know how I felt, whether she wanted to or not.
Chapter Eleven
Caroline
I eased out of my car and walked towards the beautiful glass building as I took a slow breath. Everything was perfect about Santa Barbara, including my job and the condo that I was still living in thanks to the firm. Everything apart from the fact that Perry wasn’t here. I worked extra hours when I wasn’t exhausted, coming to the unit to shower and cry myself to sleep almost every night.
It was pathetic.
I entered through the doors and made my way to the elevators, smiling when I saw my coworker Lana. “Morning,” I told her as she blew into the cup of sweet chocolate and coffee with a need in her eyes.
“Hey there, mama. How are you doing?” She asked as she handed me a cup of decaffeinated green tea with a rueful smile.
“I’m tired. I miss coffee,” I responded as the doors opened and we walked inside. I looked down at my belly, starting to show now as Perry’s baby kept growing inside of me. Once I took the test when I was away on my interview to find it was positive, I knew that I was going to take the job if they offered it to me. I didn’t want to inconvenience Perry with a baby, particularly since I’d assured him that I was on the pill. I knew that was stupid even at the time, but I wanted him so bad. I wanted all of him, and a part of me wondered if there was an immature part of me that wished for a baby. What was I thinking? He asked me more than once if it was safe, so I knew that he probably didn’t want to start a family. He was at a high point in his life with the company and not having to worry about a thing.
