Abby clung to him, kissing him back, tears prickling behind her closed eyelids. She fought them back, knowing there would be time for tears later.
They made love again that night. Still tender and slow and sweet. Tasting each other, stroking, caressing, committing the feel of naked skin to memory. When they finally lay down to sleep afterward, Lance pulled her in close, his arms wrapped around her.
When his breathing grew slow and even, she drew one of his arms to her mouth and gave it a soft kiss. “I love you,” she whispered, needing to confess the words aloud even if he wouldn’t hear them, before closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep.
Lance slid out of bed the next morning, Abby's whispered declaration of love still echoing in his head. He’d been almost asleep, but the movement of Abby lifting his arm to brush her lips across it had brought him back to consciousness. He hadn’t reacted, keeping his breathing steady so she wouldn't know he heard. She obviously hadn't intended him to. He wasn't going to say it back, even though he wanted to—had wanted to for a while—because it wouldn't be fair to either of them. He was leaving.
He hadn't planned to take her again before he left. But when he leaned over her after his shower to kiss her awake, he couldn't help himself. She was all warm and sleep rumpled in his bed, naked and still smelling of sex from the night before. He gave in to his hunger and his need to mark her, to make her his one last time. Because as much as he’d hoped to work her out of his system in the last month and a half, he’d only succeeded in embedding her firmly under his skin.
Abby responded to his kiss, and her eyes flew open when he yanked the sheets back after dropping his towel on the floor and grabbing a condom. He wanted to claim her, taste her, and feel her once more so that he’d leave with her taste in his mouth and her scent on his skin. He moved his mouth over her body, rougher than normal, nipping and sucking hard enough to leave marks.
Meeting his roughness with her own, she dug her nails into his shoulders when he sank his teeth into her flesh and raked them down his back when he entered her hard and fast. She bit his shoulder too, her teeth sinking in hard enough to give him an edge of pain to mix with his pleasure.
Their climax was explosive when it happened. She screamed into his shoulder, and he collapsed on top of her, almost blacking out from the intensity. He moved off to the side when he came to himself again and pulled her into his chest once more.
Eventually he couldn’t ignore the fact that he had to let her go, had to leave. They got up and dressed slowly without saying anything. A couple times he caught Abby looking at him, taking a breath like she was about to speak, but then she’d just let it out without saying anything.
Lance stripped the bed and tossed the sheets in the washer. He was leaving them here along with the bed for whoever took over his room. Gathering his towel, his clothes from the day before, and the few remaining things in the bathroom, he stuffed them into his backpack and took them out to the car.
When he came back into the house, Abby was filling his cooler with drinks and snacks for the road. He helped her finish in silence, then set his house key on the counter for Chris and Matt to find when they got home.
He closed the cooler and picked it up, leading Abby outside by the hand for the last time, locking the door and closing it behind him.
When he finally turned to look at Abby after loading the cooler into his car, there were tears glittering in her eyes. She smiled at him, and he pulled her in, wrapping his arms around her, burying his face in her hair.
He held her for a moment, and then lifted her chin to kiss her, tasting the salt of her tears on her lips.
Breaking away, he looked into her eyes for the last time, memorizing their crystalline depths, hoping that maybe one day he’d find his way back to her, though he had no idea how. “Goodbye, Abby. I—” He stopped, his voice catching, warring with himself over what to say next. Should he tell her? But no. He’d already decided he shouldn’t. “I’ll miss you.”
She kissed him once more. “Goodbye, Lance. I’ll miss you, too.”
His arms ached to hold her again when she disentangled herself and walked to her car. He wanted to call her name, make her come back, beg her to come with him. Transfer schools. Something. Anything.
But he didn’t.
He couldn’t.
It wouldn’t be fair to her. She had ties and responsibilities here, just like he had ties and responsibilities far away.
Their relationship wasn’t supposed to be serious. And he couldn’t break the rules now.
He watched as she climbed into her car and waved at him before driving away. He held up his hand as she passed, getting into his own car once she was out of sight.
Looking at the space where her car had disappeared, he said what he’d almost said to her before she left. “Goodbye, Abby. I love you.”
A groan greeted Abby when she opened the door to her apartment.
Confused, she flipped on the lights and the groaning doubled.
“Dude! Turn off the lights!” Matt whimpered from his place on the floor. He rolled onto his side and pulled Megan’s fuzzy green blanket over his head.
Chris lay moaning on the couch, Megan’s comforter covering him from chest to knees and his arm thrown over his face.
Taking pity on them, Abby turned the lights back off, plunging the room into gloom. Chris and Matt both let out moans of relief.
A thud came from the direction of the bedrooms, and Megan appeared in the living room. Leaning against the wall, she took in Abby’s messy hair and puffy red eyes. She didn’t say anything, just walked over and put her arms around Abby, pulling her into a hug.
The show of concern was all it took to push Abby over the edge again, and the tears began to flow. She’d only made it a few blocks from Lance’s house before she had to pull over because she couldn’t see through her tears. She sat sobbing on a side street in a random neighborhood for an unknown amount of time, waiting for the worst of it to pass so she could drive the rest of the way home. She’d managed to hold back long enough to get home, but now she couldn’t any more. She didn’t need to.
After a few moments, another pair of arms slid around them from behind her. They were muscular and a little hairy. The smell of stale beer and the feel of a large body pressing into her made her lift her head and look over her shoulder. Chris smiled, and gave a little squeeze. She managed a slight curve of her lips in return.
Then Matt was there, wrapping his arms around all of them, and Abby let out a choked laugh through her tears.
Megan pushed the guys off. “Alright, alright. Let’s give the girl some room to breathe.”
Chris and Matt dropped their arms and backed up a couple steps, Chris unashamedly scratching himself before heading to the bathroom. Abby watched him walk off while Matt dropped onto the couch to lie down again.
Abby managed to muster up a little curiosity. “What are they doing here?”
With a shrug, Megan said, “We were at a party, and they said they couldn’t go home. I figured we could do an exchange. Since you were at their house, they came to ours.”
“Oh. Okay.” Abby nodded as though that made perfect sense. Then she looked Megan over again. She looked tired, but without the usual wince that occupied her face the day after a party. “Why don’t you have a hangover like they do?”
Megan smiled. “I was the DD. I figured you’d need me today, and I’m useless with a hangover.”
More tears gathered in Abby’s eyes at Megan’s thoughtfulness. Megan reached out and rubbed her arm, then turned her head and shouted, “Hey! You guys can go home now.”
Matt flinched. “Shit, Megan. Why so loud?”
Megan went and yanked her comforter off him. He reached out for it, but she flicked it out of reach. “Because if I’m loud, you’re more likely to leave just to save yourself.”
Sitting up, Matt ran a hand over his face and grumbled to himself. Megan went over and banged on the bathroom door. “Move your ass, los
er! My girl’s home, so that means you can have your place back. Go piss and moan there.”
Chris opened the door and gave Megan a death glare. She just smiled brightly at him until he retrieved his shirt from the corner of the living room and put it on. Picking up his keys and wallet from the kitchen table, he grunted at Matt. “C’mon. Let’s get out of here before she starts bitch slapping us to make us leave.”
Megan laughed loudly, and both guys winced. With another loud groan of protest at the sunshine when they opened the front door, they left.
“Alright, the boys are gone.” Megan pushed Abby onto the couch, took the keys out of her nerveless fingers and the flip flops off her feet, and put them in Abby’s room. “What do you need? Ice cream? Wine? Beer? Something harder?”
Abby just leaned her head back against the couch with her eyes closed, letting more tears slip out. With a low sound of distress, Megan climbed onto the couch next to Abby, pulling her into another hug and rubbing her back. “Let it out,” she whispered. “You’ll feel better if you just let it out.”
Abby clung to Megan, and did what she said.
Chapter Thirty-One
“There you are.”
Lance pocketed his phone and put on a smile for his mom. “Hey, Mom. What’s up?”
She closed the door to the home office behind her, searching Lance’s face before answering. “I looked around and couldn’t find you. It’s your welcome home party. Why are you hiding out in here?”
With a shrug, he looked away, clenching and unclenching his teeth, trying to keep his frustration inside and not take it out on his mom. It wasn’t her fault he felt like this. “I told you I didn’t want you to set me up, but you’ve been running girls at me all night.”
She crossed her arms in front of her chest, looking up at him. Lance had been taller than his mom for years, but she still gave him that look that made him feel like a misbehaving little boy. “I was trying to invite people your age. Some of them are young women. I’ve never known you to be unhappy about having attractive young women talking to you.”
He looked away again, not knowing what to say.
“Who is she, Lance?” Her voice was soft and knowing.
His eyes snapped back to his mom, surprised. “What do you mean?” How could she know he’d met someone? He’d specifically never mentioned Abby, especially as he spent more time with her. He didn’t want his mom getting any ideas. Or lecturing him about his responsibilities. He knew exactly what they were. He was here, wasn’t he?
“Don’t play dumb with me. You know exactly what I mean. You’ve been home for a week now and grumpier than I’ve ever seen you. Except sometimes you’re looking at your phone when you think no one’s watching, and you have this smile on your face. You look so happy. And now you’re being almost rude to the young ladies here that are trying to get to know you. The only thing I can think is that you met a girl this summer that you didn’t bother telling me about. So, you’re going to sit here and tell me now. Who is she?”
His mom’s soft voice held an unmistakable command, so Lance sat down in the desk chair, his head in his hands. He waited for her to pull out the folding chair they kept in there before he started talking. “Her name’s Abby.” It was actually a relief to talk to someone about her, even if that someone was his mom.
“Where did you meet her?”
A faint smile ghosted his lips. “At a party. She spilled her drink all over both of us, and I offered her a ride home. She had said she was ready to go, but hadn’t driven herself.”
“When was that?”
“Mid June.”
His mom let out a soft gasp. “June? You’ve been seeing this girl since June?” She waited for his nod of affirmation. “And you never said anything. Why would you keep this from me when I ask every single week?”
He ran his hands through his hair and sat back in the chair. “Why bother, Mom? It couldn’t go anywhere. She still has two years left of school, and I had to come back here to work with Dad.” He couldn’t keep the bitterness from biting into his tone.
His mom’s eyes narrowed. “I know you were never excited about coming back here to work with your father, but—”
“But what, Mom? The deal was that you guys would pay for school if I came back. You held up your end of the bargain, so now I’m holding up mine.” He spat out the last sentence, then looked away from his mother’s reproachful face. He felt like an ass for taking out his anger on her, but he couldn’t stop himself.
“Lance, I taught you better than to interrupt me when I’m talking to you.” He still wouldn’t look at her. “Look at my face.” He raised his head, taking in her flaring nostrils and the thin set of her lips.
“Why do you think I asked you that question every week?” He shrugged. “When you went away for college I told your father, ‘That boy is going to find someone while he’s gone, and it’ll be the worst thing we ever do if we make him come back.’”
Lance leaned forward in the chair again, his elbows on his thighs, his head hanging down, unable to maintain eye contact while his mom told him this. But she wouldn’t let him off the hook that easily. He knew it, and so he wasn’t surprised when she walked to him and put her hands on his shoulders. She cupped his jaw in her hand and gently lifted his face. “Do you love this girl, Lance?”
“Yes.” There. He’d finally admitted it out loud to another person. Not the person who should’ve heard it first, though.
His mom’s eyes examined his face. “Does she love you?”
“Yes.”
She pulled her chair closer to him and sat back down. “Tell me all about her. I want to know everything.”
Lance couldn’t help smiling a little, thinking that she might not want to know everything, but pulled out his phone to show her pictures and tell her about their summer together.
She asked questions, pushing for more details sometimes, and he shared them gladly, wanting to relive every second of their time together too.
After a while she looked at the clock. “Look at that! We’ve been up here for an hour. I’m surprised your father hasn’t come looking for us. We’d better get back to the party. But Lance? You either need to go back to her or get her to come down here.”
Lance shook his head. “She can’t come here. She still needs to finish school, and her mom …”
She nodded, like everything was settled. “Okay. Then you’ll need to go back there. We’ll start planning after everyone goes home tonight.”
“But Dad—”
“You let me worry about your father.” With a final pat on the cheek, she left him sitting in the office, dazed by their conversation. Was she serious? He’d just moved back, and she was happy to let him go again? And how would she convince Dad?
Despite all the questions, he felt hopeful for the first time since he realized he was in love with Abby and couldn’t do anything about it.
Chapter Thirty-Two
Abby dropped her bag on the floor and flopped down on the couch. Thank God it was Friday. Megan had connected Abby with the temp agency she’d worked for all summer, and today was the last day of Abby’s temp job. She’d decided she wasn’t going to take another one. Classes started again in just over a week, which meant she’d return to her job with the Foreign Language Department. She wanted a week to relax before getting back into everything.
She was exhausted. The temp job had served its purpose as a distraction since Lance left two weeks ago. The extra cash had been nice, too. But working constantly in an unfamiliar environment, trying to stay on top of someone else’s job while they were out, plus barely sleeping because staying with Lance all those weeks had made it impossible for her to sleep on her own made it so all she wanted was a nap.
The sound of the front door closing startled Abby awake. “Hey, Abs, you hungry?”
Blinking and rubbing her eyes, Abby tried to gather her bearings after being startled awake from her unexpected nap on the couch. “Yeah, I could eat.”
Megan breezed past the couch into the kitchen, opening the fridge. “Great. There’s nothing here. Let’s order a pizza and we’ll go to a party after.”
Abby groaned. “Megan, I’m really not in the mood to go to a party tonight.”
Casting a look at Abby over her shoulder while she filled a glass of water, Megan shook her head. “You’re never in the mood for a party. But you don’t have a choice. I’m not taking no for an answer.” She walked back into the living room and stood over Abby, who had toppled over sideways on the couch in silent protest. “Don’t make me drag your ass to the car when the time comes.”
“You’re not strong enough. I’ll go limp, and you won’t be able to move me.” Abby’s voice was slightly muffled from speaking into the couch cushion, but she knew Megan heard her.
Megan paused, seeming to contemplate Abby’s pretend threat. “True. I’ll just call the guys then.” She turned and walked toward her bedroom.
“What guys?” Abby sat up, her whole body tense as she waited for Megan’s response.
“Chris and Matt,” came the nonchalant answer.
Abby followed Megan into her bedroom. “You’re still talking to them?”
“We text sometimes. They let me know about good parties. Like the one tonight.” Megan leveled a glare at Abby. “And you’re going, so quit whining and pick out some clothes.”
“I thought we were going to order a pizza first.”
“We are. I’ll call in the pizza in a minute. But if I know you, you’ll try to wear your Pluto T-shirt, and I’ll have to make you change. So pick out something now so I can veto it before the pizza gets here.”
Abby wandered to her closet, hearing Megan’s voice on the phone with their favorite pizza place. Well, second favorite. Their favorite didn’t deliver.
Sliding some hangers around in her closet, Abby didn’t try very hard to pick out anything to wear. Megan was right. She’d just veto anything Abby picked, so she might as well just wait for Megan to come in and pick for her.
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