“What are you talking about, Nathan?” Todd said, trying his hardest to sound confused.
“Anyway, Mom wants us downstairs for pictures in ten. So hurry up, Blossom.” Todd gave Claire an energetic two-thumbs-up. “And remember, Powerpuffs save the day!”
Claire whipped a fuzzy pink slipper at him and hit a black-and-white photo of Massie's grandfather instead. It crashed to the ground but didn't break.
“Get out!”
Todd and Nathan raced out, screaming and laughing. They slammed the door shut behind them.
Claire heard the muffled sound of “Monster Mash” coming from the DJ booth, and the pre-party jitters kicked in. She suddenly felt like she had to go to the bathroom.
“Claire,” Judi shouted from the kitchen.
Claire didn't answer. She was too focused on zipping up her pink dress and adjusting her red wig.
“Claire,” Judi yelled again.
“WHAT?”
Claire was tired of the constant interruptions. All she wanted was five minutes to get ready and give herself a pep talk in front of the mirror before the party started. She needed to work on her confidence if she was going to look for a boyfriend.
“Come on,” Jay said. “It's picture time. The party's about to start.”
“COMING.”
Claire put on her mask and made her way downstairs even though she didn't feel completely ready to face her public.
“Oh, how cute!” Judi said when she saw Claire.
“You decided to dress up like your brother and Nathan,” her father said.
“What?” Claire shot her brother a look. “It was my—” But she stopped, suddenly remembering that her mother expected her to be a Dirty Devil.
Claire didn't know what to say next. If she told her mother what happened at school, Massie would get in trouble. And the thought of Massie's wrath made the insides of Claire's stomach bunch up in fear. She would hunt Claire down like a limited edition Motorola and destroy her like last year's Ugg boots. Claire's appetite for Halloween candy was completely gone.
“Yeah,” Todd said interrupting her. He widened his eyes just enough for Claire to notice. This usually meant she should shut up and follow his lead, but she couldn't imagine where he was taking her.
“Mom, I know you wanted her to dress up like Massie, but me and Nate really needed a third, so we begged her and she finally said yes. You're not mad, are you?”
Claire shrugged and gave a what-can-you-do? look.
“How could I be mad at that?” Judi smiled lovingly. “I think it's incredibly thoughtful.”
“Okay,” Jay said as he took the lens cap off his camera. “Picture time.”
Jay started snapping and Judi directed the kids, suggesting different poses so their pictures would have variety.
“How did you know about my costume with Massie?” Claire asked Todd through her fake smile.
“I happened to overhear your phone conversation with Layne,” Todd said through his teeth.
“Why did you lie for me?” Claire whispered.
“Sometimes I like to use my powers for good instead of evil. And I figured you could repay me by doing my math homework this weekend,” he said.
“Fine,” Claire said.
It was either that or admit to her parents that their dream—to have her and Massie become friends—would never be more than a fantasy.
THE BLOCK ESTATE
MASSIE'S BEDROOM
6:50 PM
October 31st
Massie was standing in front of her full-length mirror, trying to slide the devil horns onto her head without ruining her perfect part. It would have been easier if she wasn't talking on her cell phone at the same time, but she was late.
“Kristen, try to stop crying,” Massie said. “I can't understand what you're saying.”
“My” (gasp) “Mom” (sniff) “won't let me” (sharp inhale) “go tonight.” Kristen let out a final sob.
“Tell her it's an all-girls party.”
“It's not that.” Kristen blew her nose into the phone. “It's the call she got from Principal Burns about our outfits today. I knew we should never have worn—”
“No offense, but your mother's way too strict.” Massie straightened the devil's tail on the back of her skirt. “When I got home, my dad gave me a two-second speech about obeying school rules and went right back to downloading an audio book off the Internet.”
“You're so lucky you have cool parents,” Kristen said.
“Can't you just sneak out?” Massie asked.
“No way! I'm already in enough trouble.”
“Well, it will totally suck if Dylan steals Derrington.”
Kristen started crying even harder.
Massie knew that comment was the last thing Kristen wanted to hear as soon as she said it, but she was upset that her friend was going to miss her party. Massie wished that just this once, Kristen would stand up to her parents.
“Kidding,” Massie said. “I'm sure she won't even have the guts to talk to him.”
“Yeah, right.” Kristen sniffed. “Ever since she lost weight, she's been a total flirt.”
“Don't worry. I'll call you, 'kay?” Massie knew she should have been more comforting, but she had five minutes to get Bean in her Dirty Devil outfit, and her makeup wasn't even close to finished.
After fifteen more minutes of primping, Massie was finally ready. By seven o'clock she was in position by the side gate, ready to greet her guests. It was a warm night, especially for October, which made the backyard feel as magical as it looked.
“Everyone is going to be talking about this for the next fifty years,” Landon said as she zipped by carrying a venti cup of coffee and a box filled with skull candles.
Massie's heart was so full of pride, she thought she was going to burst.
A huge banner hung above the entrance that said, WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER. It was written in red paint that looked like dripping blood. Waiters in red unitards dressed as Satan's helpers handed out orange-and-black tote bags so guests would have somewhere cute to keep their candy. A huge skating rink with a layer of mangled heads frozen below the surface had been placed beside the swimming pool. Two ghouls were stationed in one of the cabanas that had been converted into a booth full of rental skates. And mannequins hung off the massive oak tree dangling above the pool, which had been dyed red.
Three raging bonfires crackled and roared, casting an orange glow across the entire lawn. These “Pits of Despair” were surrounded by red blankets so the guests could sit on the ground and roast marshmallows with the wooden pitchforks that were laid out beside them.
The DJ was already playing music, Jules the caricature artist was setting up his easel, and the dry ice machine was casting an eerie fog that hovered above the top of the grass. Everything was in place except for one last detail.
Massie scribbled OUT OF ORDER on a piece of paper and stuck it to the door of one of the bathrooms by the pool. After all, every hostess needed a private place to rendezvous with her friends.
The first guests had started to arrive. Just as Massie had hoped, everyone was speechless when they walked through the gates.
“Massie, I think I've died and gone to hell!” Sadie Meltzer said, trying to be funny. She and her other B-list friends were dressed as princesses. Sadie always looked for an excuse to let her butt-length hair out of its ponytail, something her mother only agreed to on special occasions. “This is the coolest party I've ever been to. You and Claire are amazing.”
“Actually, Claire didn't have anything to do with it,” Massie said. “Unless of course you count writing out the invitations.”
Sadie said something back, but Massie could barely hear it. The only thing on her radar was Cam Fisher. He was approaching with Derrington and an unidentified person in a gorilla costume.
Massie thought the best thing about Cam was his eyes. One was green and one was blue. Alicia described his look as “psychotic husky,” but Massie preferred “in
tense.” Even though she was tempted, she stood by her decision not to tell anyone about her feelings until she was absolutely one hundred and ten percent sure that he liked her back. She had learned a lot from the humiliating mistake she'd made with Chris Abeley.
For weeks Massie had stalked him at Galwaugh Farms so they could ride their horses together. She ditched her friends to spend time with him and even pretended she was BFFs with his sister, Layne. All the while Massie had no idea that Chris only liked her as a friend; he was dating a disgustingly beautiful ninth grader named Fawn.
“Don't you look vicious.” Cam grimaced as he greeted Massie. She searched her brain for something clever to say about his costume, but he was dressed as a soccer goalie, so there wasn't much to work off of.
“What are you supposed to be?” she asked Derrington, hoping the abrupt subject change didn't tip them off to how nervous she was.
“A dirtbag,” Derrington mumbled. His head was poking through the top of a green garbage bag that was smeared with mud. “So are these the famous costumes we heard about all over school today?” Derrington looked Massie up and down, but she wished Cam had noticed her instead. He was too busy pulling a twig out of the gorilla's facial fur.
Massie was getting ready to brag about how much trouble they got into at school when she was interrupted by a Powerpuff Girl.
“Hey, sorry I'm late. My parents made me pose for a thousand pictures before they'd let me leave the house.” She turned to Derrington. “Hi, I'm Claire.”
“You must be the new girl we've been hearing about,” he said. Cam turned away from the gorilla to steal a look at her.
“You've heard of me?” Claire asked. But Massie pulled Claire away before they had a chance to answer.
“Look,” she hissed. “There's no point in both of us standing in the same spot. Why don't you hang by the DJ booth in case people want to request a song or something? I'll stay here by the front and take care of the welcome thing.”
Massie was relieved beyond belief when Claire left with-out putting up a fight. Now that she was out of the way, Massie was free to focus on Cam. He was heading toward the treats table, and Massie tried to look casual by chatting and mingling while she followed closely behind. She was suddenly overcome by a strong craving for sugar.
CURRENT STATE OF THE UNION
INOUT
Dylan and Derrington Kristen and Derrington
Massie and Cam Fisher Massie and Chris Abeley
The “old Block” The “new girl”
THE BLOCK ESTATE
WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER PARTY
7:40 PM
October 31st
Claire made her way past the moaning zombie waitresses who were offering up “horror d'oeuvres.” She got the hint that Massie wanted her to disappear, but she certainly wasn't going to spend the night standing beside the DJ booth. This was her party too.
“Hey, Blossom.”
Claire turned to see Layne lumbering toward her. People cleared the way to let her pass, not so much because they were polite, but because they were scared they'd get knocked to the ground if they didn't.
“Wow, you really went for the whole couch potato thing, didn't you?” Claire said to her friend before snapping her picture. Layne was stuffed inside a horizontal refrigerator box. The pea green cushions from her basement sofa lined the top and her face was painted brown, like a potato.
“I love this holiday,” Layne sighed.
Just then Alicia and Dylan walked by, twirling their tails and strutting their stuff.
“Oh, look, a couch poo,” Alicia said to Dylan.
“I'm a couch POTATO.” Layne adjusted her pillows. She looked at Claire and rolled her eyes.
“I'm glad you told me,” Alicia said. “I was about to compliment you on your new dress.”
“Yeah,” Dylan said. “Anything's better than those janitor friendly man pants you've been wearing lately.”
“At least I wore a costume. You look the same as you always do,” Layne said. “Identical to Massie.”
Claire was so impressed by Layne's courage and quick wit she wanted to throw her arms around her friend and give her a hug. But that would have to wait until the box was gone.
“Yeah? Well, you look the same as you always do,” Dylan said. “Stupid!”
Claire and Layne knew their comeback was much better and hurried over to greet their friends before a major fight broke out.
They made a few laps around the yard with Meena and Heather, who were dressed as dead versions of Paris and Nicky Hilton. They both wore blond wigs, barely there dresses, and green face paint. It looked like all seventy-five people showed up, and Claire couldn't help wondering if anyone would have come had it just been her name on the invitation.
For the most part, the boys were lingering around the treats table and the girls were hovering around the edges of the dance floor. Everyone seemed to be laughing and having a good time, but no one was mingling.
“This DJ is so Wal-Mart,” Meena said. “When is he going to stop playing those cheesy Halloween songs and start playing something cool?”
“Now,” Claire said. She led the way to the DJ booth.
“Excuse me.” Claire used her most polite voice. “Hi. Um, do you think you could start playing some real songs soon?”
The DJ looked down at Claire from his booth and smiled so big the bottom of his goatee spread across his chin.
“I thought you'd never ask,” he said. “That Landon Dorsey chick forced me to play this crap.”
Seconds later Britney Spears's “Toxic” was blasting out of the speakers and everyone rushed the dance floor. Meena and Heather were the first ones out there. “It's what the Hilton sisters would have wanted,” Heather said before they took off.
“Do you think anyone will ask me to dance in this stupid Powerpuff Girls costume?” Claire asked as she bobbed her head to the beat.
“See!” Layne shot her finger straight into the air like she had just made a brilliant discovery. “That's exactly why I didn't want you to invite the boys. If it was a girls-only party, you wouldn't care how you looked in your costume. You'd be dancing already.”
“Yeah, and if it was girls only, I wouldn't have come,” Claire said. “I've seen what these girls do for fun around here and it usually involves torturing me. So, if you won't introduce me to any boys, I'll do it myself.”
“Oh, right.” Layne smiled, amused, as if Claire had just told her she was swearing off gummies. “Better yet, why don't you ask your co-host to introduce you? I dare you.”
Claire bit her lower lip.
“If I do, will you promise to stay and talk to the boys with me?”
“Totally,” Layne said. She obviously didn't believe Claire would go through with it.
“Fine,” Claire said. “I guess I have nothing to lose except my life, which isn't worth very much these days.”
Layne rolled her eyes at Claire's melodramatic comment and playfully nudged her in Massie's direction.
Massie was standing by the bloody swimming pool, surrounded by a group of girls who were gushing over Bean's Dirty Devil costume. Four boys lingered on the outside of their tight circle, awkwardly punching each other.
Claire walked quickly at first but took smaller, slow steps once she entered Massie's force field.
“Hey there, co-host.” Claire smiled as she nudged Massie's arm. She knew that was probably a bad idea as soon as she did it.
“S'cuse me,” Massie said to her guests. She backed away from the circle and yanked Claire with her.
“What?” Massie barked when they were alone. The thick coating of black lipstick around Massie's mouth made her look so evil, Claire wondered if she was really in hell.
“Sorry to interrupt you, but I was wondering if—”
“Kuh-laire, do we look like a pair of boobs?”
“What?” Claire asked. “No.”
“Then stop trying to hang beside me,” Massie said.
“I was, uh, w
ondering if you could introduce us to a few of the Briarwood boys?” Claire pointed to Layne, who was watching from the azaleas.
Massie straightened the horns on her head before she spoke. “Why don't you ask the couch poo? She knows the same people as me.”
“She's shy,” Claire said. “Besides, our moms were probably expecting you to help me out since they think we're such good friends and everything. Right? Isn't that what you told them when you asked if we could throw this party together?”
Claire prayed that her voice was trembling. “How upset do you think they'll be when they find out you've been telling everyone this is your party?”
“Why guess?” Massie asked. “Why not tell them right now?”
Claire's insides froze. That was not the answer she was hoping for.
“Fine, I will.” Claire turned and headed down the path toward the main house. She looked down at her patent leather Mary Janes while she walked and prayed for a miracle. She had no idea what to do next, but she marched ahead like a girl with a serious plan.
“Okay, wait,” Massie called after her.
Thank you, God!
“Meet me in the out-of-order bathroom in five minutes. I'll bring over two guys that I think will be perfect for you and Layne.”
“No LBRs,” Claire said. She knew she shouldn't abuse her sudden power over Massie, but it was hard not to. “And no funny business or I'll talk.”
“Done,” Massie said.
As Claire walked back to Layne, she wondered if any boy was actually worth this kind of trouble.
WHEN HELL FREEZES OVER PARTY
OUT-OF-ORDER BATHROOM
8:22 PM
October 31st
The out-of-order bathroom was a tight squeeze for Layne and her oversized costume, so Claire was forced to sit on the toilet seat.
“I can't believe I let you talk me into this,” Layne said.
“You promised.” Claire finger-combed her blond hair and reapplied some clear gloss. “How many guys do you think will be into a girl they met on the toilet?” she asked Layne as she lowered herself onto the cold seat.
“We're being set up.” Layne tried to keep the corners of her costume from scratching the plaid Ralph Lauren wallpaper. “Why would she have us wait in a bathroom if she wasn't planning something humiliating?”
Best Friends for Never Page 7
